The Twin

by Smokey Moment

  “Noah moved to Manhattan. He bought a condo there. Why you ask? You still trying to get him in bed?” he joked. “Oh Niles. Stop. Its more than that. I want to get to know him. Then bed him,” she said, with a hearty laugh. Cheyenne laughed then looked at Niles. She reminisced about her first impression of the twins. One was a playboy. The other, a hard working, laid back man. She was surprised she fell for Niles even though she believed Noah was more her speed. She too was hard working and driven. She too was living separate from her father’s wealth and had just reluctantly inherited a portion of it. Cheyenne was stable. She was reserved. She didn’t like drama and she expected a commitment not a romp in the bed. Niles was fun. Sexually, he was dynamic. Addictive. But she needed him to settle. She was ready for him to cool the steam that rose from his chest. He was a man who was always turned on. And it could be tiring. Cheyenne always needed a lot of down time. They were opposites. But even still, she adored him. And she hadn’t a clue his heart belonged to his brother’s now wife.

  The boat cruised along the coastline of the Saint Lawrence River. The captain was a former employee who had retired from Langston Financial. Niles hired him to be his driver whenever he took the boat out. Rodger Dayton kindly accepted the position. He loved boats and Niles’ boat was fabulous. Cheyenne and her friend enjoy the scenery as Niles listened to music while he played his friend Chuck, in a game of chess.

  “Watch him Chuck. He’s fierce,” Cheyenne teased. Niles nodded, as he studied his first move. Knight to F3 was his selection. He hoped the move would help him control the middle. Chuck moved to his Knight to F6. Niles rubbed the tips of his fingers together. He decided to move his Pawn to C4. Chuck looked up at him. “You trying to control the center huh,” he said, as he moved his Pawn to G6. Cheyenne took a sip of her champagne then looked out at the city. Melanie struck up a conversation about the guy she was seeing. Soon the women decided to take their drinks to the cabin and leave Niles and Chuck to play their game. Niles promised he would play for an hour or less. And he and Chuck would end their game if no one won. Chuck was a formidable opponent. Niles didn’t see an easy win. Niles looked over at Cheyenne then moved his Knight to C3. Chuck hesitated then moved his Bishop to G7.

  “What’s up. You awful quiet man,” Chuck remarked. Niles made another move. He continued rubbing the tips of his fingers together. “I’m good,” he replied. Chuck pondered the board. “So, you and her an item now?’ he asked in a low tone. “Nah. Just friends. I’m good on love. The one time it happens for me the shit ain’t meant. That’s my luck though. I guess karma for being unavailable to women. My payback,” he said, as he shook his head slowly. “Who you talking about?” he asked, looking curiously at his friend of nearly fifteen years. Chuck and his family lived in the same gated community that Niles and his siblings grew up in. Niles was open with him. Because of their busy lives, they did a lot of communication over the phone. Chuck didn’t recall Niles mentioning falling in love. He was confused.

  “Nothing man. I never got a chance to tell you because the shit ended before it even began. The only woman I ever truly loved. And the shit happened in the blink of an eye. We had this bond. This chemistry. Something I didn’t believe existed,” he said. his gaze on the pieces of the chess board. His mind somewhere else. “And what happened? Where is she? If anybody can get their woman back it would be you man. You have a way with women and you have something to offer. What woman wouldn’t be trying to get back to you,” Chuck assured. Niles knew better. Chuck didn’t have all the story. Bella was unaware there was anywhere else she had to be. She was living with who she thought was him. He was sure of it.

  “You can have all the money. Everything a woman desires… And it still won’t be enough.” Chuck sat back. Niles was giving half a story and he sensed it. “What man…is she married?” he asked. Niles leaned forward, his hands in a fist. He placed them under his chin. He looked at Chuck and shook his head. “Yeah. Something like that. It’s complicated.” Chuck nodded slowly. Niles would never give every detail but what he said was enough. He took a sip of his drink then moved his pawn. Niles was deep in thought when suddenly his phone vibrated. Noah sent a text. Niles sighed. He thought about whether he wanted to read the message. He was still upset and hadn’t been responding to any messages from Noah. He put his phone in his pocket without reading the message. It killed him not to read it. But he could be stubborn. It was trait both brothers had in abundance. Noah’s call and text went unanswered. Again.

  “So, what’s up with you and Niles? I’m surprised you two are still going strong. You’re so picky. How are things?” she asked. Cheyenne rubbed the rim of her glass. She was swept into her feeling for him. He hadn’t stated his intentions. “I don’t know. I wouldn’t say we’re going strong. He still won’t commit. Never has told me he loves me. He’s hard to read. I mean, he’s open about his wants and desires. We talk. But he told me on the first date he wasn’t looking for anything other than a companion. I was okay with that at first. He has a reputation and I wasn’t trying to get hurt. But we are closer now. A part of me wants to ask him if he’s had second thoughts. But I’m afraid it will cause him to withdraw. I really like him. I’m falling for him. I want more. I don’t know,” she said. Melanie understood. She had dated a man with similarities. “Tell him how you feel. He has to man-up and at least revisit that conversation. There are first dates, and then there’s several months in. Sometimes men need help getting out of their own way.”

  Chapter five

  When Walls Crumble

  “These are not the right size,” Bella complained, as she pulled out a new line of tops she ordered from a company in Hong Kong. Bella inspected the material. The clothing was not the quality she expected. She was disappointed and decided to sell them for half off, which barely covered her costs. The dinging sounds of the bell above her door signaled someone had entered. Bella walked from the back of the shop. “Belle,” Chrissy greeted then hugged her. The women were life-long friends. They had grown up in the same neighborhood and attended the same high school.

  “Look at this. All the wrong sizes. I swear. I don’t know why it’s so hard to get an order right,” she complained as she folded the items and put them back in the box. “What’s going on with you,” she asked her friend. Chrissy never hardly stopped by. She worked the midnight shift at the hospital and wasn’t available for such visits. “Nothing. I’m off today. Finally. Wanted to see you and Dani. Go grab something to eat like old times. But she says you’re still avoiding her,” Chrissy said, looking deeply at Bella. She ignored the comment.

  “No Bella! You’re not still mad at her. That was months ago. She called me. She said she has apologized and hopes you will forgive her. Since when are you so mean. So unforgiving. You have to forgive her. Ralph has been doing crazy stuff. Coming to Vegas like that was the tip of the iceberg,” she said.

  “I know,” Bella said, as she sat the clothes down and began to reflect on what was happening around her. “I’m not even mad anymore. Truth is that’s how I met Noah,” she replied. “Where is he anyway? I wanted to introduce him to Conner. He promised he would help him figure out his finances. He said he would show him what to do to open the car shop. He did call. But Conner wants to talk to him again. Thanks for getting him to call, by the way. Conner learned a lot from him just in that one phone call. He said he was a mathematical genius.”

  Bella smiled. Noah was gifted. He helped her double her income by helping her use social media to promote her store. He’d also helped her gain a larger following and use ads as a way to grow. She was seeing results. Things were going as planned.

  Chrissy looked around the store. She held a yellow tee shirt up and marveled at how beautifully designed it was. It had small pink and white rhinestones that formed the word Empowered on the front. “I love this tee. Are there any more? Any other colors?” she asked. Bella didn’t respond right away and Chrissy walked closer. She could see her friend was distracted. “What wrong?” she
asked. Bella had a puzzled look on her face. “Nothing,” she said, as she sighed. “Something’s wrong. I know you. Come on Belle. This is me,” she said, Chrissy always thought Bella had married too fast. Noah was practically a stranger. It was a risky move. She had met him once and she liked him. But she still wondered what characteristics he possessed that would begin to tear at the fabric of their close bond.

  Bella took a deep breath and tried to clear her mind. She walked slowly towards her leather stool and sat on it. Chrissy sat on the one next to her. “I love him. I do. I don’t regret marrying him. But…” she said, taking a long pause before continuing. “There something missing between us. He’s different. Funny thing is he was someone I adored when we met. I fell in love instantly. We fit. We gelled like a married couple. It felt so magnetic. It was the stuff dreams were made of. And we knew it. We felt lucky. The relationship was full of energy. We couldn’t get enough of one another. But something happened. He changed. I feel crazy. Like maybe I didn’t experience what I thought I did,” she said reflecting on the weeks up to the marriage.

  Bella frowned. Her mind wandered. She felt she was going crazy. She wondered if she was originally caught up in lust and now the newness of the relationship had worn off. Her mind raced. There were a million things that could have gone wrong. She had thought of many over the last weeks. And she still had no answers. Nothing made sense.

  “Don’t get me wrong…He’s great. He’s nice. But it’s strange. How can someone change so completely? I feel like I’m in a whole new relationship with someone I don’t connect with. And I continue to hold on hoping we get back to the way we were. And to make matters worse, he doesn’t want children. Not even one! I don’t know Chrissy…. Maybe he regrets marrying me,” she expressed.

  Chrissy held her hand. Bella was straight forward in her wants. She wanted to be in love and she wanted to be a mother. She was a sweet and open woman with a romantic heart. She wanted to be romanced by her man. She longed to be caught in the rapture. She believed that if two people had deep love, the excitement would never leave. That it may dim a little, with time, but never go out. That the flame would flicker with different levels of intensity but always burn.

  “What do you mean by changed?” Chrissy asked. “I don’t know. Changed! Different! And I was so caught up in the moment that I didn’t think about whether we wanted the same things. I wanted him to be my dream man and I filled in the blanks for him, instead of letting him fill in his own blanks. I fantasized and created what I wanted. And he’s just so different from when we were in Vegas. I could probably deal with his changes if he would at least let me be a mother. No kids. Ever! Like what. Who wants that for their future? Not me. At least one. No children, is not an option. I’m thirty one. I waited to be married to be a mom and now I’m married and still won’t be a mom,” she said, her voice filling with emotion the more she talked.

  “So what, if he doesn’t want them. Get pregnant anyway. You don’t need his permission. Women do it all the time. We have babies. That’s what we do. We don’t always consult them. Sometimes it just happens. They’ll never be ready. Men think having a baby is like scheduling a foot massage. Make him ready. Just pop up pregnant. He has cold feet right now. He’ll change his mind when you’re carrying his seed,” she assured. “Don’t you think I thought of that. I’m not on anything. And I’m still not pregnant. Either he did something to ensure he wouldn’t get me pregnant, or I’m not fertile. Oh Chrissy! I don’t know what to do. Maybe this was a mistake. We are not on the same page.”

  B

  ella grabbed her purse and headed to the door. “I’m going to the shop. After that I’m going to stop by my parents,” she informed her husband. “Ok. I’m leaving out too. I have to meet with a man about leasing an office. This one is larger than that last one I looked at. I think it will be better for my clients,” he said. Noah was ready to get Principle Investments viable. He had already told his family and friends. And now is was time to make it happen.

  He had a few local customers and word of mouth had his business picking up steam. But he was currently going to them instead of having a place for his customers to come to. “Alright,” Bella replied, hesitant about leaving. She wanted to talk to him again. But she felt her words, and his promises, were all in vain. Bella walked to the door and turned the knob. She let go of the door handle and walked back to the large bedroom they had turned into an office.

  “We need to talk Noah,” she said. He sighed and sat his ink pen down. Bella instantly fumed. He was giving body language that suggested he was done talking. “Never mind,” she huffed then turned to walk away. “Bella! Talk! You want to talk, go ahead. I’m listening.” Bella turned back around. “Yes. And that’s all you do. Listen. But then ignore every request. You won’t give an inch. Marriage is a give and take Noah. This is not about you.” Noah looked off. Bella became more infuriated. “What do you want me to say. Huh. I don’t… want… kids. Not right now,” he said.

  “You don’t want them ever! You want me to wait. Then you’ll say it again five years from now when you think enough time has passed. I know how this goes. This marriage goes the way you want because you have the money to make it go in your favor. You think if you pay the bills, you get the say so,” she argued. Bella continued ranting. She was tired and now she was venting.

  “And you have more money than you originally told me. Where are you getting all this money from? Why do I feel as though you haven’t told me everything. And when do I meet your family. I don’t care if they won’t accept our quick marriage. They have no reason to dislike me. None. You’re hiding me,” she accused. “I am not. You know I don’t fuck with them. At all. You want me to prove it. Call them one by one. Have them get all mushy over the phone because I never call. And I never said I was broke. I have told you everything. You know me,” he replied. “No! I don’t. And to be honest, I could care less about the money. And I figure I’ll meet your family eventually. So those things don’t concern me at the moment. What I do care about is whether or not being a mother is in my future. And if the answer is no. Then we have made a huge mistake!”

  Bella stormed out of the condo. Tears streaming. Her heart feeling as though someone ripped it out of her chest. She wanted Noah and all that came with him. She was certain his family would love her. Certain they would embrace her children. After all, her children would be their grandkids. She not only wanted to be a mother she wanted a large family. A family that consisted of a complete set of parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles. If his parents were deceased that would be one thing. But they were alive and well. “This is insane. Who cuts ties with the only parents they have? And their siblings,” she said, as she hurried to her car.

  Bella stopped in her tracks. She turned around and went back inside. Her life flashed before her eyes. And she didn’t like the future she saw.

  “Noah,” she yelled, pushing the door hard enough to slam. It closed semi-hard at best. She wanted her entrance dramatic. She wanted him to understand the gravity of the situation. “I’m here in the office. Why are you yelling?” he said. Bella stormed in.

  “That’s just selfish. I love you. I want your babies. How do you marry a woman who has no kids, then say she can’t have any? Did you not once consider how that would make me feel. I have a small family. Its only me, my mother and my father. I have no siblings. Once my parents are gone, that’s it. I’ll have no one else. It will just be me and you. Not that what we have isn’t wonderful, because it is. But I want more than that Noah. I won’t have extended family to lean on because you don’t want me to have a relationship with your people. And I won’t have children to raise and love. That is so selfish. When did you become so selfish?” she cried.

  Noah couldn’t come up with the words to please her. He sat silent. Afraid of saying the wrong thing. He was stubborn to a fault. He sat silent and Bella screamed out with vengeance. “I want a baby Noah!”

  He looked at her. His face casting a blank st
are. She was being overly pushy and aggressive. He wasn’t use to this side of her. “I want to ask you something?” she said, hesitating and sounding nervous. She cleared her throat. She looked up. His attention was elsewhere. He was present only physically. And he couldn’t fix their problems in a few minutes. “How many times will we argue about the same things. Huh. What do you want me to do at this very moment? Tell me how I can fix it right this second?”

  Bella let out a loud sigh. “You know what…I think you’re hiding me. Are you hiding me? Is there another woman? Someone else?” she accused. “Why would you ask me that. Now I’m messing around. Don’t be ridiculous Bella. Don’t just make up things. No. I’m not.” Bella didn’t really believe he was. But nothing made sense. If he was otherwise involved and had been untrue, then things would make sense.

  Noah was nervous. Niles wasn’t talking to him and he had no moves to save his marriage. Telling her to wait had run its course. And he couldn’t give her an answer. He bore a look she didn’t recognize. He looked as though he had no control. Bella became confused. “This won’t work. I can’t….I can’t… We rushed. Before we knew important things about one another. I can’t do this,” she said, pacing and venting. Noah shook his head in disbelief. “What! Bella don’t. I need time to…” he said before she stopped him. “Time to what! That’s what you said four months ago. Then two months after that. Why marry me if you’re not going to even try,” she said, tired and emotional. She walked closer to his desk. “If you are not willing to give of yourself. Then why not just stay a bachelor,” she said.

  Noah got up and walked towards her. “Come on baby. We’re doing good. Don’t be mad. Don’t fight me. You have to trust me,” he said. Bella shook her head. She believed he was buying time. He had no children. Which was rare for a man who was thirty years of age. And from what she’d gathered, he hadn’t spoken to his family in months. She didn’t believe he would change. He was only asking for time hoping she would accept things the way they were. “No! I have to think. Maybe this is all wrong. I don’t know what to do. I can’t deal with this right now.”