Forsaking the Prize

by Boyd, Heather

  Twenty One

  Tobias stood as the ladies departed the dining room, and then dropped into his chair. He’d endured the meal in near silence, watching Blythe chat happily with her sister and Leopold, recounting the events of the day. Her suitors were much talked over and laughed at. From the conversation, he’d picked up a few topics of conversation to avoid when courting Miss Trimble, but the prospect still filled him with dread. He wasn’t sure he was capable of being that agreeable. He longed to be just as he was.

  “What a day,” Leopold murmured as he refilled their glasses.

  Tobias took his, sipped, and then set the glass aside. “I heard you managed to play knight in shining armor.”

  Leopold scowled. “Arrogant bastard. To propose and then taunt her with news of her eviction is no way to win a woman’s heart.”

  Tobias sat forward. “Wait. Did you just say she’s lost her home?”

  “Not yet but soon. Apparently that stepson of hers has leased Walden Hall for the summer to a friend of his. Lord Archibald thought mentioning the unpleasant news would sway her to accept his suit. Blythe may very well have been tossed out because she stayed here too long. But if you ask me, Lord Venables was looking for any excuse to reclaim the estate from her control, and we’ve gone and unintentionally assisted.”

  “Devil take it! What will become of her now?”

  Leopold smiled. “She’ll live here. Mercy insists and there are plenty of rooms to choose from.”

  “So she’s without funds, too?”

  “I don’t know the particulars, but I do not believe she’s exactly penniless.” His brother paused, staring down at his drink for a long moment. “Mercy will not hear of Blythe moving away, unless she chooses to marry again. The latter, I feel, is a slim chance. So here we are, all lumped together under one roof.”

  So that was it. It was Miss Trimble, or another young woman like her with a dowry to match. He could never again think of Blythe in terms of a future dalliance. She’d told him no and he would respect her wishes. She was better off penniless at Romsey than struggling to make ends meet with him at Harrowdale.

  However, Tobias’ heart was heavy with disappointment. Blythe might have refused Lord Archibald’s offer of marriage, but without a home of her own, there would be many more tempting offers coming her way. It was just a matter of time. Eventually, she’d choose someone to replace her husband. She was too passionate not to wed again.

  “I forgot to ask how you went on your first social call,” Leopold said suddenly. “Was Miss Trimble accommodating?”

  “I forgot to take flowers,” Tobias confessed. “But Miss Trimble seemed polite enough and I’m looking forward to calling on her again.”

  “A pity you didn’t dance with another young woman last night for comparison, but there is no need to rush these things. You’re young and healthy. Mercy tells me the ladies were impressed with you, despite your failure to dance all night.”

  “That’s good to know.” Tobias stared at nothing. He wasn’t eager to attend another entertainment. He couldn’t watch another roomful of men ogle Blythe. He shook his head. He had to stop thinking about her so possessively.

  ~ * ~

  Good manners dictated that a woman should spend some time in conversation after dinner before she could safely retire without giving offense. Blythe flicked the edge of her book with her finger. It was still not time to retire upstairs and she was extremely conscious of the man sitting at her side.

  Tobias had barely said two words during dinner and none directly to her. Given that it was so unusual not to hear him speak, she kept peeking at him. As far as she could tell, he wasn’t in distress. Was he silent because she’d declined to take their relationship any further?

  “Letters have arrived for you, my lady.” Wilcox stood before her, his little silver tray poised on his fingertips.

  She swallowed, hoping her observation of Tobias had gone unnoticed, and took the short stack from the tray. “Are these all for me?”

  “Yes, my lady. Every last one.”

  Blythe shuffled through them quickly to see who had written. They were all from acquaintances. The last in the pile was from Emma Trimble. She stared at it and her hand shook. Emma didn’t often write. She usually came to visit when she had something to say. Emma’s letter was likely an angry one.

  “You’re very popular this evening,” Tobias said soft enough that only she heard. He stood. “Well, its been a long day. I think I’ll turn in. Until tomorrow.”

  He sauntered out and Blythe followed his exit with mixed feelings. Part of her wished he would stay and talk to her again.

  Mercy sat beside her and peered at the notes. “Are you going to read those?”

  Blythe tapped the letter on the palm of her hand. “I should.”

  Mercy stilled her tapping. “Would you rather read them alone? We can leave you if you’d prefer.”

  Blythe glanced across the room. Leopold and Edwin were using small blocks of sawn wood to build towers together. It looked to be great fun and she didn’t want to disturb them. “You stay, and I’ll go. It’s been a hectic day and I might retire early. I’ll read and answer these before I go to bed. Good night, Mercy.”

  “Good night, Blythe. Sleep well.”

  Blythe collected her letters, said goodnight to Edwin and Leopold and hurried upstairs. But as she crossed the threshold of her chamber, her resolve sank as if made of lead. She didn’t want to read Emma’s note alone. She was afraid of what her friend was going to say about Lord Archibald’s proposal.

  “I know you said we shouldn’t be alone anymore, but lock the door behind you, B.”

  Blythe spun toward the bed.

  Tobias sat on the edge, his expression serious. He patted the mattress when she didn’t move. “I’ll take Miss Trimble’s letter. Come on. Let’s get this over and done with so you don’t fret about the contents all night.”

  Although common sense told her it was none of his business, she locked the door and handed the letter over. She perched next to him, anxiety rising. He quickly ripped open the note. When he finished, he placed it face down upon the bed where she couldn’t reach it. “You don’t want to read it.”

  “Why? What does Emma say?”

  He sighed. “A lot of things I hope she’s already regretting. I thought better of her to be so spiteful. She blames you for stealing Lord Archibald from her grasp. She hopes never to see you again. That is the sanitized version of her note.”

  “I never encouraged him. I don’t care for him beyond what’s required for common courtesy. Emma loves him. I don’t.”

  “I know.” Tobias twisted to look up at her. “This needs to be burned and I will hope that Miss Trimble comes to her senses and apologizes before you speak to her again.”

  “Give it to me.” Blythe held out her hand. She wasn’t exactly afraid to face a rebuke from her friend. When she replied, she’d explain the situation so Emma would understand how events had really transpired.

  Tobias eventually placed the note in her hand. When she read it, she had to admit he was correct. She should have believed him in the first place. That note should have been committed to the flames instead of destroying her hope that her friendship with Emma could ever survive this catastrophe.

  Tobias tugged the note from her grip, climbed off the bed, and knelt before the fire. Slowly, he waved the bitter pages over the flames until they caught and were consumed.

  Once it was gone, he returned and pulled her into his arms. Blythe burrowed her face into his neck to hide how hurt she was. She’d not encouraged Archibald, but Emma believed the worst of her, and all because he claimed she’d flirted with him.

  “You’re not a tease, Blythe. I’m exactly the man to know. I could stand a bit of encouragement.”

  Blythe thumped his chest and earned his warm chuckle in her ear.

  “See. Nothing flirtatious about that sort of thing,” he whispered.

  He shifted until he was propped up against he
r bedpost, holding her fast against his chest. “Shall we see what the others are? I noticed a few familiar names.”

  Blythe glanced at them, but didn’t feel enthused about the idea. She was quite content in Tobias’ arms. “I suppose I should, but if they are all similar to Emma’s I don’t think I could bear it tonight.”

  His lips brushed her brow. “Then let me take care of the chore for you.”

  After a moments pause, Blythe nodded. She was too weary to disagree, and there could be something of importance contained in one that didn’t have anything to do with Lord Archibald’s proposal. When Tobias released her, Blythe perched on the bed to wait.

  He tore through them; muttering an occasional curse under his breath. Blythe clenched her hands in her lap, rather glad he wanted to spare her feelings.

  Eventually, he tossed the lot onto her writing table, face creased into a scowl. “Three discreet offers to meet and discuss terms, one request to go driving, and two of your female friends really shouldn’t be spoken to again because they are blinkered sheep.”

  Blythe shrugged. “That’s not so bad. When I married Venables half the district labeled me a money-hungry adventuress. I’ll survive this.”

  “I hope so.” Tobias dropped to his knees at her feet. “In the meantime, I do know a way to distract you, but I’m not sure if you’ll agree. A kiss, without any expectation beyond the moment, might bring sweeter dreams than that nonsense.”

  Blythe hesitated a moment and then sat forward. His kiss was tender and drugging and made her forget everything terrible about her day. She closed her eyes as he swept her into their private world of scandalous pleasure. He pulled her closer, but he kept his hands still at her waist. He never once assumed she’d offer more, and when he left her a short time later without a word, she was feeling a little sad over her decision to keep him at bay.

  Twenty Two

  Tobias sat through another morning of gentlemen callers for Blythe from the seclusion of the duke’s sanctuary, his disgust growing with every moment. He wasn’t there to spy, although that couldn’t be helped as their voices traveled so well. He had skimmed two more journals since sunrise and was about to begin a third.

  He stood, stretched his back, and then tiptoed to the doorway. He could see Blythe through the peephole, sitting a few feet away, back ramrod straight as usual. Her speech was calm and polite to even the most blatant flirtations. Was this how proper gentlemen would court a proper lady?

  He drew back in disgust and raked his fingers through his hair. He had to get out of the abbey for a while. The next moment Blythe was without callers, he would slip out. He checked the peep hole again. Thankfully, Blythe’s latest suitor stood to take his leave, rather obviously mentioning his pleasure at seeing her getting on with life.

  Nausea gripped him. He nodded to her as he exited the room and made his way to the terrace doors.

  “Where are you going?”

  Blythe’s trembling question wrapped around his chest and stilled him. He took a deep breath and spun about. Damn but he wanted to cross the room and take her into his arms. But he’d promised to keep a distance. He would master his desire if it killed him.

  Yet he couldn’t stand to see, listen or imagine Blythe falling for another man’s flirtations. “Harrowdale,” he said eventually. “I’m going home where I belong.”

  He let himself out without turning back and promptly knocked Beth Turner off her feet. He apologized and lifted her from the ground, returning her fallen basket to her hands.

  “Forgive me for not seeing you,” he apologized.

  Beth brushed off her gown. “Of course, sir.”

  They followed the same path away from the abbey.

  Beth stopped suddenly. “Tobias, might you tell me where your mother is buried? I should like to pay my respects and place flowers on her grave. She was very kind to me when my mother died.”

  “Mother did have ulterior motives where you were concerned,” he teased, but uneasiness trickled through him. “We honestly don’t know. My parents are not buried at Romsey. That is another matter to investigate. I cannot remember precisely where the carriage overturned.”

  Beth squeezed his arm then quickly stepped back. “I’m sorry. That makes your return all the more bittersweet, doesn’t it?

  “Romsey has forever been a source of disappointment.”

  Beth frowned. “Why so morose today?”

  “A touch maudlin. Nothing to worry about. May I accompany you for a walk?” He fell into step beside her when she nodded. “It’s true that the old duke didn’t kill me with his kindness. I survived.”

  Beth sighed. “I’m happy someone will live at Harrowdale again.”

  So was he. “The date for my removal isn’t set yet, but I feel it is coming closer. I still need to find servants.”

  Beth gave him a strange look. “Do you now?”

  “Hmm, just one or two. I’ve simple needs.” Tobias stopped before a shrub and ran his fingers over the dark leaves. The scent of rosemary filled his nose. “Mother’s Rosemary bushes have grown wild and large at the house. It will pain me to do so before my sister can see how they’ve grown, but I will need to cut them back.”

  He snapped off a sprig and tucked it in his pocket.

  Beth patted his arm affectionately. “You always were so different from your brothers. Never a harsh word, always remembering to show kindness despite your teasing. I am glad to see you unchanged by the years.”

  He scowled and looked ahead. “You make me sound weak.”

  “No, I think you very strong. You have a generous heart, Tobias Randall. I’m glad time and circumstance haven’t changed you.”

  Tobias ducked his head as Beth hurried off. He’d never be that trusting boy again. He still waited for the good to be taken away. He faced the abbey. Inside Romsey, he couldn’t behave as he would like. What he had discovered with Blythe wasn’t a happily ever after. Blythe’s guilt over betraying her husband’s memory was a bucket of ice water over any pleasure they shared. He had to stop thinking of her and wanting more. She’d called a halt to their private association and wouldn’t let him get any further.

  He drew in a deep breath, conscious of a heavy weight upon his chest. It was time. He would return to Harrowdale today, and make definite plans for his immediate removal. The moment had come to step back from temptation and leave Blythe alone.

  He set off on the most direct path toward Harrowdale, ignoring the light drizzle that fell upon him. But the further away from Romsey his strides took him, the more uncertain he became. It would be lonely at Harrowdale. He’d have to find ways to keep himself busy.

  As he broke from the trees a short distance from the house, the smell of wood smoke filled his nose. He glanced around, looking for the source of the fire. When he found none, he hurried toward Harrowdale. Could the place have caught alight in his absence?

  When the house came into a view, he gasped as a curl of smoke drifted across the rooftop. Tobias broke into a run. Harrowdale was on fire. His home would be denied him.

  Panic lengthened his stride and he was in the courtyard in an instant. Thankfully, Harrowdale wasn’t on fire, however, smoke rose from more than one chimney. The kitchen chimney, too. He approached the servants door warily, lifted the latch and quietly let himself in.

  The sound of laughter filled his ears. One voice, female, he particularly had reason to remember. He stepped into the doorway and set his hands on his hips. “Finch, what is the meaning of this?”

  Blythe’s former housekeeper beamed. “Sir, it is so good to see you finally returned. We, ah, have a proposition for you.”

  He glanced around the other bodies seated around the battered kitchen table, noting their full hands and crumb scattered plates. Five bodies were crammed into the space and he thought all of them were Blythe’s former servants. “Do you now? Do you know how much your disappearance has upset Lady Venables?”

  “We couldn’t let her know directly, sir. When Lucas overhe
ard his lordships servants talking about the new family moving in we decided we’d pack up and go, too. This house was empty and you seemed the kind to appreciate hard work and loyalty.”

  “How is it loyalty when you deserted your mistress? She’ll think I’ve stolen her servants from her.”

  “We never deserted our lady. We’ll be here and have everything ready for her when she needs us.”

  Tobias sagged against the doorframe. “So this is just a temporary stop on your way to your next home. Unfortunately, I fear you may be disappointed. Lord Archibald, her most determined suitor, has a well established household as do the others. I doubt she could take you all with her.”

  “What is Lord Archibald to our mistress?”

  “He asked her to marry him.”

  The housekeeper stood suddenly. “How did she answer?”

  “She said no, but it is just a matter of time before someone rich enough comes along and sweeps her off her feet.”

  “Then you don’t know my mistress.” Finch flicked her hands at the other servants, sending them scattering. “You should go back now and make sure she doesn’t.”

  “Of course she will say yes eventually.”

  Finch laughed heartily. “She cannot be made to do anything she doesn’t want to.”

  Tobias didn’t care for the housekeeper’s comment, even if it was accurate. “I am well aware Lady Venables stubborn temperament.”

  “As are we.” Mrs. Finch beamed. “Nothing would have compelled her to place her trust in another man but a deep affection.”

  “So?”

  The housekeeper smiled at him as if he were simple. “She brought young Adam’s things here. She trusts you. She cares for you.”

  Tobias scowled. “You are imagining an affection that doesn’t exist. I annoy her.”

  “Yes, I know. However, the fact that I know is significant. If my lady didn’t care for you, she certainly wouldn’t draw attention to that fact. She’d ignore you completely.”

  “We are much thrown together at Romsey,” he said quickly. “She has little choice but to speak to me.”