The Scale (Martha's Way)

by Mika Jolie

  He looked her over from head to toe, taking in her physical transformation. She tried to read him to see if he appreciated her weight loss but his face revealed nothing.

  “Are you pregnant?” he asked finally.

  The words cut through her like a dagger. Her immediate reaction was to draw back and cry, instead she let out a soft chuckle. The time apart, as much as she hated it had served her well. It had forced her to let go of her insecurities. Jason’s last words were still fresh in her memory. I can’t love you if you don’t love yourself. It took her awhile to understand what he meant but she got it now, to really love someone one must learn to break free from your own fear. With new found strength she met his gaze.

  “I’m not pregnant Jason. If I were…”

  “You wouldn’t have told me, would you?”

  This time she was the one who held his gaze with challenge. “How much of a coward do you really think I am?” Her body rippled with frustration, heartbreak and now anger. “Yes, I would have,” she continued without giving him a chance to answer. “Every man deserves to know if they are a father to a child. It is up to them to choose if they want to be a father. Lucky for you, I’m not pregnant so don’t worry, you are under no obligation.”

  A silence fell between them. The cool crisp air that came along with the change of weather caused Minka to shiver a little. She looked up at the sky, a clear fall night with the stars shining down upon them.

  She’d arrived on the island yesterday and had been awed by the change. Most of the tourists were gone. It was quieter, more serene, and she loved it just like the man who stood frozen before her.

  “You said you shouldn’t have come here.” Jason was the first to speak, reminding her of her words from a few minutes ago.

  Minka let out a little chuckle again. Out of desperation she had uttered those words and wished she could take them back. There were so many things she wished she could take back, but if only life was that easy. “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m glad I’m here.”

  He didn’t say anything.

  “How long do you intend to stay angry with me, Jason? I can’t spend the rest of my life apologizing or begging,” she said gently.

  He thrust his hands in his pockets.

  “I love you,” she confessed once again. It no longer mattered if he turned her away. “It’s been three months and I’ve miss you every second of the day. I ache.”

  His eyes were still on her, watching her and letting her speak. She shook her head and smiled. “So you see, I’m glad I’m here. I wanted to be here to see you celebrate your mother. I wanted to be here in your arms but I may be too late for that.”

  “I’m not with her.”

  The words didn’t register to Minka as she continued to speak her mind. She had to say the things that had been plaguing her for the last three months. He could turn her away after but at least she’d know she tried. “I wouldn’t blame you if you slept with her. Of course it’d hurt but I’d get over it. I want us back.” She managed a tight smile “I want to love you, if you’ll let me.”

  “Minka…”

  It was then she realized he had somehow managed to close the gap between them and was now standing close to her. Her pulse quickened.

  “I’m not sleeping, having sex, whatever you want to call it with anyone.” His breath caressed her face as he spoke. “It will forever be you.”

  Her heart did a somersault with relief and joy. She inhaled his familiar citrus scent. Everything about him turned her on. Dizzy, she blinked. Did she dare believe they had a chance to start over?

  “I was angry for a very long time,” he admitted. “I also thought you needed to be alone for a while. I did some soul searching. I was going to come after you tomorrow.”

  Her body went still, thoughts spinning in her head. It took all of her strength not to throw herself in his arms.

  “Then I found out you were on the island.”

  “You knew I was here. They promised not to tell,” she said partly to herself. Each one had given their word of honor. Minka wasn’t crushed by the betrayal. Their loyalty as expected should be to Jason. He was family while she was the woman who’d double-crossed him.

  He nodded with a smile, the familiar twinkle back in his eyes. “No one told me but I figured it out. Everyone was avoiding me,” he said with a smile.

  His gaze stayed on her for what seemed like an eternity but he didn’t touch her. Instead he took a few steps away and started walking along the path. Not quite sure if she should follow, Minka remained still with her heart in her throat. He paused and turned to her then gradually extended a hand.

  “I think I heard you say you love me and want to start over.”

  “I do.” Her voice trembled in response.

  “All right then, let’s talk.”

  She took a few steps toward him and placed her hand in his, which he brought to his lips for a warm, lingering kiss. Jesus! She melted.

  “I love you, Jason.”

  He smiled. “I know. And I’ve missed you. I love you. I thought about coming after you every day.”

  She waited for the but.

  “However, I thought you needed some time alone.”

  Three months ago, she had started to gain an understanding of self-acceptance, self-love. Not that she was perfect, not by any means. The difference was now she loved who she was and all her imperfections in a perfect way.

  Jason had been right. As much as she disagreed with him then, she did learn without loving herself, she truly couldn’t love him or any other and therefore limited the expansion of her soul.

  For twenty-seven years she had lived within boundaries. The more she accepted and loved herself, the more those boundaries ceased to exist.

  “You’ve lost weight,” he observed. “Have you reached your goal?”

  “I’m comfortable now,” she answered. “I didn’t lose a lot. Maybe ten or fifteen pounds.” And that was a guess because she no longer jumped on the scale every morning. The only way she knew she’d lost weight was by the looseness of her clothes.

  “You no longer weigh yourself?”

  “I don’t have a scale.”

  His shoulders relaxed. “Don’t ever change who you are for me.”

  “It wasn’t for you, Jason. I mean, you were right when you told me I needed to love myself. I didn’t know it then but I do control my own happiness. I’ve survived the last few months without you in my life. It hasn’t been easy but…”

  He freed one hand from her grasp and reached to touch one of her loose curls. Minka had long given up on the idea of taming them. He inched closer and slid an arm around her.

  “I’m sorry for hurting you. That was not my intent,” he said, his voice gruff and glib at once. “I was sure I needed to let you go, but I’ve regretted every second of it.”

  He closed the space between them and their bodies touched.

  “I’m sure of a few things, as a matter of fact.”

  She let out a soft moan; the heat in his voice burned her skin. Minka closed her eyes as his lips touched her head then her ear.

  She shivered in his arms and this time the low, mournful sound came from Jason.

  “I was thinking,” he said, now trailing kisses along her neck.

  The cool air didn’t help any. Her body was a pool of heat. She moaned and tried to turn to give him all of her, but he held steady. She couldn’t help it; Jason would always make her body quiver.

  “I was thinking you should make Martha’s Vineyard your permanent home too.”

  His voice was husky and downright sexy. And it was making her head spin, so much so that his words didn’t register at first.

  “Jason.” She gasped, realizing there was a proposal of some sort coming.

  “I figure we have the love part covered and, since we don’t seem to care about using any protection,” he teased against her lips, “it’s only a matter of time until you’re pregnant.”

  “So this is about me get
ting pregnant?”

  He kissed her then, a deep, sexy kiss with promises of what was to come for the rest of their lives together.

  He pulled his lips inches away from hers. Minka’s hands automatically went to his chest, holding him close.

  “This is about me asking you to marry me and be my wife,” he acknowledged. “Minka Greene, will you be my wife?”

  She pulled him to her and kissed him. A hard and very sure kiss. A kiss that promised a lifetime together, their infinity. When she finally pulled away to fill her lungs with some of the cool, crisp October air, Jason pulled her back against his chest.

  “Is that a yes?”

  She smiled. “One hundred percent yes. Je t’aime, Jason Montgomery,” she said in French, showing off the few words she had picked up from him.

  “And I love you, ma chérie.”

  He produced a small, dark velvet box before her. Minka froze as he opened it to show her a classic Emerald cut diamond engagement ring set in a platinum band. Minka’s fingers automatically touched the delicate band. Something so simple held so much hope. A future.

  Jason removed the ring and gently slid it onto her finger. To her surprise, it fit perfectly. He lowered his lips to the ring, then the back of her hand.

  “How did you guess my size?”

  He grinned. “I cheated. I recruited Lily and Keely.”

  “They know?”

  “Everyone knows. Although Adam thought you should run while you can and say hell no.”

  She could picture the happy-go-lucky Adam teasing his friend affectionately. She laughed and nestled into his arms.

  “I take it you’re about to be my brother-in-law.” Keely’s voice echoed in the darkness of the garden. Minka shifted her head in that direction and noticed all of them were standing there smiling, waiting to congratulate them.

  Jason’s father was the first to embrace her, welcoming her to the family. Her sister hugged her and whispered “I love you” and promised to gladly cut a few pieces of Jason if he ever hurt her. Then the others followed with hugs.

  After everyone disappeared back inside the gallery, Minka remained in Jason’s arms in the garden. Earlier she’d dared to ask if she could be any happier. Oh, how wrong she was.

  A thousand emotions twirled inside of her like the autumn leaves winding and whirling fantastic trails in the most exquisite and delightful way. She couldn’t help smiling. Not only because she was about to marry the only man she could ever love, but because she had reached that point where she was now independent of fears yet dependent on love. Every now and then when she caught her reflection, someone beautiful greeted her. When a stranger smiled at her, she smiled back and made eye contact. She now laughed with her family.

  She had finally reached that contentment in life along with a sense of well-being. Because of the balance, she was ready for the next chapter of her life with Jason Montgomery. She would forever love his gentleness and how, in his own way, he managed to teach her to love herself.

  “I love you so much,” she whispered in the darkness.

  His hands caressed her arms. He had since given her his jacket. “I can hear you say that for the rest of my life.”

  “That’s a good thing, because you have me forever.”

  He kissed her, sealing their now and forevermore.

  *The End*

  About the Author

  Author of contemporary sensual, empowered romance, with fun relatable characters. I’m also a wife, and mommy to two energizer bunnies. Member of Secret Cravings Publishing. When I do have time to breathe, I like to run, hike with my camera at hand, and work on my gardening and knitting skills. I promised my husband I’d knit him a scarf…that was 5 years ago.

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