When You Were Mine

by Elizabeth Reyes

  She lifted her foot up to demonstrate the very high wedge shoes she was wearing, and his attention was immediately drawn to her shoes. She glanced up in time to see his eyes wander slowly up her entire body until their eyes met again, and once again her insides were a hot mess.

  The lips that had gone flat when she mentioned the ring was a gift from Reggie began to lift at the corners again, slowly, teasingly. “Your shoes are probably the first thing I noticed about you,” he said. The dimple on one side of his face, the side where his lip lifted the highest, sunk impossibly deeper into his cheek. “Last year,” he added.

  That surprised her, and she wasn’t sure she believed him.

  “How could I not notice?” he continued as if reading her mind. “Don’t get me wrong. There’s so much more to you to notice, but you were Reggie’s girl. Like most of the other guys on the team, he and I were pretty tight. It wouldn’t have been cool for me to notice much more about you. But those shoes . . .”He peered down at them and then back at her. “It’s kind of hard to not notice a girl walking into a party working shoes that high as effortlessly as you did. It was very impressive.”

  Valerie felt the corners of her own lips lift slowly, wondering which party he’d noticed her at. “That was part of the reason why I broke up with Reggie,” she informed him, maybe a little too honestly. “Things like that didn’t feel right.”

  As expected, he looked confused. “Things like what?”

  “I remember a time or two . . . maybe more when I walked into one of those parties where you were at or maybe you walked in and I was already there, when I was still seeing Reggie.” She paused for a moment, wondering if she should go on, then decided why not? “It felt wrong to not be able to give him my full attention because I was so distracted by you.”

  His eyebrow lifted, and she got the feeling maybe this time he wasn’t sure he believed her. “Is that so?” She nodded as she felt the tug of his hand on hers, pulling her a little closer. Taking a step forward, she tried but was unable to keep her eyes off his lips. “You dumped Reggie because of me?”

  “I didn’t say that,” she laughed nervously. “I just. . . Well, obviously, I wasn’t that into him if I could so easily be distracted by another guy.”

  He stared at her for a moment; then his lips opened but he didn’t say anything as if he changed his mind. Curiously, she waited, and then he seemed to change it again. “Was I the only guy who ever distracted you like that when you were with him?”

  For the first time that day, she felt uncomfortable. Why the hell had she said anything about this? The question felt heavy with ulterior motive, almost as if it were a test. If she answered honestly, would that scare him? Make him not want to chance so much as a fling with someone who might get too clingy? If she lied, would he think her a slut—at the very least an insatiable boy-crazy flirt he might lose respect for?

  Deciding to stick with honesty as she had all day, she smiled, feeling her face flush. “Yes,” she said softly, hating how vulnerable admitting this made her feel, but then she’d never thought to prepare for this. Being here with him was something she never in a million years thought she’d be doing.

  His eyes brightened a little, but he said nothing at first. Instead, he stared at her silently as if deciding if he believed her or not; then he smiled. “I didn’t think a girl like you blushed,” he said, tugging her hand and making her take a step closer. “I never would’ve believed it if I hadn’t seen it for myself.” He pulled her even closer, making her take another step forward, and she was now standing between his legs, their lips close enough to kiss. “Why does that embarrass you?” he whispered, staring in her eyes.

  She wanted to ask him what he meant by a girl like her—wondered if she should be insulted. But the way he was feasting those sultry eyes on her she was having a hard time keeping her thoughts straight. Instead, she shrugged, biting her lower lip and feeling her face go even hotter.

  “Jesus, you’re adorable.” He smiled even bigger. “I hope you don’t mind. You have no idea the restraint I’ve had to practice all day today, but I have to kiss you now.”

  With her heart thudding loudly in anticipation, Valerie glanced down at his lips just as he leaned in and kissed her. Softly, gently, he brought his hand around her waist, pulling her even closer to him so their bodies were pressed together. No matter how many times she’d imagined being in his arms, none of those fantasies even came close to the reality of it.

  He stopped after kissing her a few times and stared in her eyes. The look in his eyes was intense but at the same time a bit startled. He brought his hand up to her face, cupping one side of her face and searching her eyes for a moment before kissing her again just as softly as the first time but a bit longer—deeper. She knew he’d be a good kisser. Somehow she’d always known. But the way their tongues moved together felt so overwhelmingly perfect it was unreal. That second kiss also went on much longer than she had expected it. The longer it went on, the more she felt the intensity mount but not in a the usual way a kiss intensifies—as though you want to start ripping each other’s clothes off. It was different. She’d never even tried to explain it to anyone else. If she tried to, she was afraid she’d sound crazy or full of herself.

  It was perfection.

  Not just the kissing but everything she felt the entire time his lips were on hers, kissing her deeply—so profoundly. He only stopped every now and again to stare in her eyes with unspoken confirmation that he too was feeling the same unexplainable craziness she was. And he didn’t understand it either, but one thing was for sure. Neither wanted it to stop.

  Valerie knew now she should’ve known right then what an addiction Alex would become to her. She sighed, thinking of all the times she’d compared herself to a hopeless crack addict. Despite knowing how dangerous to her heart it was to continue to hope things would change, she just couldn’t bring herself to walk away from him. Not for good. Like this whole week. Except for the few irksome calls he’d stepped outside to take, everything else had been perfect. She dared not ruin things by questioning something as petty as his needing more privacy to take his calls.

  Though he was quick to ask who she was talking to or even texting when she was on her phone, she refused to ask him about his calls. Most of the time he offered an explanation without her having to ask. It was usually one of his brothers or his dad with stuff about the restaurant, a responsibility that was increasingly being left in Alex’s hands lately.

  It was where he was tonight. His parents were home monitoring calls from Mexico because his grandpa was ill. The restaurant, which used to be run primarily by his parents, was slowly being handed down to the brothers. But because his older brother Sal was attending a school hours away, the bulk of the responsibility was left to Alex, who was the second oldest.

  Valerie had never been much of a cook, and Alex had already told her he was bringing food home from the restaurant. But she still wanted to have something for him when he got home.

  Feeling a little giddy, Valerie pulled the tray of oatmeal cookies she’d baked for him out of the oven—not from scratch of course—but they were his favorite, so she’d stopped at the market on her way home from work today and bought the frozen kind. It was silly, but playing house at his place was a taste of what it would be like to actually live with him. So far, except for his long hours, she was loving it.

  She glanced up at the clock on the stove. It was almost nine. He did mention he’d be late, but he hadn’t mentioned closing. Only having to close would have him there that late. But she remembered in the past he’d been asked to stay and close plenty of times. Tonight might be the same thing, and if that were the case, it’d be close to ten before he was home, so she squashed the unease that he might be somewhere else while she waited for him at his place like an idiot.

  Hoping she might have gotten a text from him, she checked her phone and frowned when she had none. But she did have one from Sarah. She clicked on it and read it.

>   Hey what’ve you been up to? I haven’t seen you in too long. All we do is text or call each other lately. I’ll see you Saturday, right?

  Having no idea what her cousin was talking about, Valerie plopped down on the sofa and texted Sarah back with a few question marks. Valerie had just clicked the television on with the remote when her phone pinged. Even though she knew it was likely Sarah, a part of her held out hope it was Alex.

  It wasn’t.

  The Taste of La Jolla! I thought for sure you’d be there! Angel and I are working the first shift at the Moreno’s booth, but after that we’re free to enjoy the festival.

  That was this weekend already? It felt like just a few months ago she’d just been at the annual food, beer, and wine festival. She immediately texted Sarah back, commenting on how fast that felt and that she hadn’t even realized it was this weekend. Valerie had been so busy studying for her state exam, and then playing house with Alex was all the distraction she needed to really lose track of everything else. But she left that part out.

  Her phone ringing startled her, and again her heart did a little skip, hoping it was Alex, but again, it was Sarah.

  “Hey,” Valerie said as she answered it.

  “Never mind,” Sarah said, sounding a little deflated. “I’m still here at the restaurant, and just as I was reading your text, I heard Angel’s dad explaining that they’re leaving for Mexico tomorrow morning. He came in to talk to Angel as soon as they got the call that his grandpa was rushed to the hospital. So the three brothers and Sofie will be running the show all weekend. Angel will likely have to be in that booth all day all weekend. I’ll probably be right there with them, helping out too. You know how crazy busy it gets.”

  It dawned on Valerie that it was strange that Alex hadn’t mentioned it. But then their family’s restaurant participated in the festival every year. Maybe he just assumed she knew about it and knew that’s where he’d be all weekend.

  “Well, maybe you can sneak away with me for a little bit.” Valerie said, trying to make her feel better. “Is Alex still there?”

  “No, he left over an hour ago,” Sarah said. “But I’m sure he’ll get a call soon enough from Angel or his dad.” Sarah continued but in a lower voice as Valerie’s stomach plummeted. “I feel so bad, Val. His dad looks pretty broken up. They think his grandpa had a stroke. I saw Angel hug his dad because I think he broke down for a moment there. I couldn’t even watch. So I just walked away.”

  As bad as Valerie felt about Alex’s grandpa, she was suddenly too pissed to empathize. He’d been gone for over an hour? The restaurant was less than ten minutes away from his place. He’d warned her he’d be late tonight, so wherever the hell he was, this was something he’d planned ahead. Yet he’d mentioned nothing other than having to be at the restaurant.

  She felt so stupid now, being there stuck at his place because he’d picked her up at her apartment today after work. She didn’t have her car. Now even if he got home and they fought, she’d be stuck there.

  “Yeah, that is sad,” Valerie said, doing her best to sound sincere.

  Mostly she was. Alex had mentioned his grandpa hadn’t been well in that last few months. He’d also been real worried about his dad. “My mom says it’s not looking too good for my grandpa, but my dad’s still holding out for a miracle. It’s like he’s in denial that his dad is that sick. I shudder to think of how he’d take it if my grandpa suddenly goes.”

  The front door opened, and Valerie turned to see Alex walk in holding a backpack and a plastic store bag.

  “I gotta go,” she said in a lowered voice, “but, yes, I’ll be there Saturday. I’ll stop and see if I can whisk you away. We’ll have a drink or something.”

  Alex stared at her from where he was standing as he pulled his wallet out of his pocket and set his phone on the dining room table.

  “Who was that?” he asked as soon as she was off the phone.

  “Sarah,” she said, not wanting to look at him. “Where were you?”

  “Working,” he said.

  “Until just now?” she asked, trying desperately not to sound like a nagging girlfriend, but that’s exactly how she felt.

  “No.” He plopped down next her, and instantly she wanted nothing more than for him to kiss her—reassure her insecure heart that she was all he needed just as she’d only ever wanted and needed him. “I had errands to run,” he said, pecking her softly. “I had to go to three different drug stores to find the brace I need for my ankle.” He motioned with his head to the bag he’d just dropped on the end table then lifted his nose in the air. “Smells good. Did you make cookies?”

  She nodded, already feeling a strange relief. Strange because she wasn’t sure if she should be feeling it. Why hadn’t he called her to tell her he was off or come pick her up and have her go with him on his errands?

  Just the other night he’d picked her up after his shift at the restaurant and asked her to come to the gym with him. “I’ve really been slacking and need to get back in the gym, but I haven’t seen you all day. Come with me,” he’d said.

  Taking a deep breath, she decided not to pout like a child about this. So he didn’t pick her up and take her with him. Big deal. The important thing was she couldn’t imagine him getting home this aroused and kissing her the way he already was if he’d just left the arms of another girl. Giving into him as she always did—she was beginning to wonder if she’d ever be strong enough not to—she lay back on the sofa, already trembling in response to his tongue and decided to just enjoy letting him have his way with her.

  ~~~

  Last year, Alex and Valerie’s to-be-or-not-to-be relationship was in not-to-be mode when the Taste of La Jolla first started, unlike the year before when she’d hung out with Alex, his brothers, and Sarah at the booth from the beginning.

  Moreno’s restaurant had been participating in the festival for years, and the stupid local girls who were into the brothers took advantage of the chance to talk to them by making plenty of stops there. Last year was no exception, so of course there’d been drama. Not for Angel because he was always so preoccupied with Sarah to be bothered with other girls, but Sal and Alex and even Romero, who’d helped out for a few hours, had hammed it up for the girls stopping by. Valerie had been witness to Alex’s flirting and even exchanging numbers with some of the stupid bitches. How could they stand there and take his number when the girls before them did just the same thing? It was infuriating.

  But Valerie couldn’t talk too much shit. She was the stupid one who, after watching him blatantly flirt all day with other girls, ended up in his bed that night.

  Between Alex and his foulmouthed, hotheaded friend Romero, there were few times when she could actually get away with hanging out with guys without some kind of eruption. Last year, after seeing Alex’s behavior with the girls at his booth, she decided to just ignore him and have some fun of her own. She’d gone there with a couple of girlfriends, and they’d quickly gotten the attention of other guys.

  Even now, knowing his explanation for it all and just remembering how it felt to see him ham it up with those girls, it still made her angry. Her face actually heated at the memory . . .

  Valerie tried to concentrate on what Monica was saying to her and not look over Monica’s shoulder where she could still see Alex leaning against the booth counter, grinning from ear to ear. The girl talking to him was playing with her hair, her hips swaying from side to side as if she were listening to music. Then she handed him her phone, and he started tapping something into the screen. Valerie didn’t doubt for a minute that he was giving the girl his number. It turned her stomach, and she casually placed her hand on her belly.

  Thankfully, she soon had a distraction. They’d wandered away toward where the bands were playing. A group of guys, who looked as if they’d just come from a Padres game because they were all sporting Padres tanks and jerseys, came up to talk to Valerie and her friends. One of the quieter ones of the group with an impressive build
and timid smile, Oscar, bought Valerie a beer. She’d been standing with him and the rest of the group by the stage where the bands had been playing for all of ten minutes when Romero tapped her on the shoulder. “Where’s Alex?”

  She was instantly annoyed because this had been the drill for years. If Alex didn’t approach her when she was with a guy, his loyal goon just loved stepping in for Alex.

  “At his kissing booth, passing out his number,” she practically hissed. “At least that’s where he was the last time I saw him.”

  In the usual way things went down, the moment Romero had Oscar’s attention he stared him down hard as if to say “Say something. I fucking dare you.”

  Wisely, Oscar didn’t, and Romero continued to stare at him even after he’d turned away. She’d always considered Romero’s smirk sexy, but it was grating at that moment and any time it was directed at one of the guys she was trying to be friendly with.

  Romero finally turned back to Valerie. “He’s looking for you.”

  Before she could respond that she didn’t care, Alex was there.

  “Can I talk to you?” he asked, looking over her shoulder at Oscar no doubt.

  “I’ve nothing to say to you, Alex, and I’m busy right now.”

  “Just give me a second, Z. I’ll make this fast.”

  The visual of Alex putting his number in those girls’ phones came to her, making her wild with jealousy again. “No!”