Loving a Santini

by Schroeder, Melissa

  They stopped to eat at one of her favorite stands. She had insisted she loved their poke. Of course, it could have been the worst place to eat on the island and he would happily go. He might not eat much but getting to sit across the table and watch her was worth it.

  Of course, the food was spectacular. He had found that Hawaiians, both by blood or by residency, seemed territorial about their poke and shaved ice. They all seemed to have their favorite place, and people in the office were always telling him which one he should go to.

  He smiled.

  “What’s behind that smile?” she asked as she scooped up more poke and rice with her chop sticks.

  “Nothing. Just thinking about some of the people I work with.”

  “Yeah? Do you like your job?”

  He thought about it. “Yeah, more than I thought I would. I never would have thought I liked to work behind a desk, but I do. I like numbers.”

  “Oh no. You’re one of those people.”

  “What people?”

  “Number people,” she said.

  He laughed. “Yeah. I have a BS in finance and accounting.”

  She snorted.

  “What?”

  “BS.”

  “What, you have a BS, right?”

  “Yes, but I am a nurse. I heal people.”

  “And I make sure the government can keep the lights on.”

  She studied him for a long second. “You really like it?”

  “Yeah. I knew I would go into the Marines. Well, I was at Annapolis and Santinis serve. So, I went into combat.”

  “But you did this job?”

  “Well, an O-3 can fill the job, but they prefer an O-4.”

  “Uh, my eyes just crossed. What are the O’s?”

  “You really don’t know?”

  She shook her head. “I help my military folks, and I might know what they do, but I don’t always understand the ranks. I take it that O-3 means Captain?”

  He nodded. “And O-4 is Major.”

  “So, that’s good that you got that. Like a step up.”

  “Yeah, and I dreaded it, but I like it. A lot. I like working all the forms, figuring out the budget, playing God with millions of dollars.”

  “Ah, so it isn’t the job, but the fact that you control so much money.”

  With a chuckle, he shook his head. “Nah, but it is a little heady to think I can say no to someone and give that money to someone else.”

  “What will you do after this?”

  For a long moment, he couldn’t think. What was his plan? Before this job, he had always thought he would go back to combat, but he liked this.

  “Not sure.”

  “Your dad’s an accountant, right?”

  “Yeah. I get all my money smarts from my dad.”

  “And from your mother?”

  “My cooking ability. Plus, my looks, according to her.”

  Again, she studied him. “I think you’re like the perfect combo of your parents.”

  “I keep forgetting you met them.”

  “Yes, well, I bet I see them again.”

  “Why?”

  “A grandbaby. They will be here.”

  He laughed. “That’s true, and Lalani isn’t moving from the islands.”

  “What would happen if Anthony got a promotion? I mean, I know he’s with the NCIS and they don’t move around all the time like the military, but to move up, you have to move around, right?”

  He shrugged. “I have a feeling he’ll stay here to make her happy. Her studio is doing well.”

  “Yeah. I always wished I had taken ballet, but I’m not made for it and my mother thought it was barbaric.”

  “Ballet? Really?”

  “Have you looked at some of their feet? And the eating disorders are horrible. Lalani didn’t have that issue, but she knew a lot of people who did.”

  He said nothing about that and continued to eat his tuna poke.

  “Marco mentioned you had an issue with a client a long time ago.”

  “Not that long ago, but yes.” She sighed. “But, I had an order of protection against him.”

  He stopped eating and stared at her. “Jesus. Marco didn’t tell me about that.”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know if he knew about it. But, thanks to a very grumpy officer, who made sure the order of protection was air tight, Richard can’t get close to me.”

  “Santini,” a voice called out. He turned and found Yoshi, one of the accountants walking toward him. He smiled at her. She was a few years older than him and apparently brought her entire brood with her. Her husband was in the Reserves and both of them were born and raised in Hawaii.

  “Hey, Yoshi, how’s the day treating you?”

  She had all three kids with her, and her husband headed off to the stand to order.

  “Pretty good.” Then she glanced at Sunshine.

  “Sorry. Sunshine, this is Yoshi Brown. This is Sunshine Foster.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Sunshine said. He watched as the oldest of Yoshi's kids, a boy of about thirteen, blushed. He understood the affliction.

  “You riding around today?”

  “Yeah, too nice of a day not to.”

  “Well, I wanted to say hey,” she said smiling. That smile told him she would tell everyone in the office before Monday morning.

  “I guess the cat is out of the bag,” Sunshine said with a smile.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean that people at work are going to know about me.”

  “And?”

  “You don’t mind?”

  He shook his head. “Why would I?”

  “I just thought that guys like to keep things uncomplicated.”

  He offered her a smile. “I’m a Santini, we’re good at complicated things.”

  She shook her head. “So, what now? Want to head to your cottage?”

  Yes. He wanted her beneath him again. Or…he thought, he could be beneath her. He’d love to get the view of her riding him.

  “Get your mind out of the gutter, Santini,” she said.

  He felt the heat rise in his cheeks. Busted. “How do you know what I’m thinking?”

  “Because I know you. And that look.”

  He shook his head. “And why not?”

  “Because we’re giving Marco and Alana a night out.”

  “Oh,” he said, his face heating even more. She giggled.

  “Your blush is about the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”

  “Shut up,” he said with little heat. Unfortunately, her comment made his face burn hotter.

  “Let’s go, so we can do whatever you were thinking about later.”

  That would have to be enough for now. He wanted more, but at the moment, he was pretty sure that neither of them was ready for that talk—if they ever would be.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Two weeks later, Sunshine’s father went back on his promises. He had said he would give her time to think, but apparently fourteen days was all she got. She arrived home, happy that she got there before Nando, who was picking up food and cooking dinner for her.

  When she turned onto her street, she saw her father sitting on her stoop. The part of her—the bad Sunshine part of her—almost drove past. But, he waved at her and she knew she had been busted. Not that he deserved her attention or respect. However, her mother had raised her to be a better woman than her father deserved for a daughter.

  She pulled into her driveway and sat there for a second. Anger had her heart beating so damned hard, she thought she might pass out. Drawing in a deep breath, she picked up her bag, opened the door, and stepped out of her car. She slammed the door as he stood and started to walk toward her.

  She leaned against her car door and waited for him to come to her. It was easy to see why her mother had fallen for the man. He was tall and fit, even twenty-six years later. He had a strong jaw, a head of thick auburn hair, and sad green eyes.

  Nope. She would not sympathize with him. He’d t
urned his back on her long ago and she couldn’t look past that. If she did, she would notice that when he smiled, as he was right now, it never appeared to reach his eyes.

  She crossed her arms. “I thought you said you would give me time.”

  “It’s been two weeks, Sunshine.”

  She sighed. “I need time.”

  He cocked his head as he studied her. “I would think that you’ve had enough time.”

  Why had she felt sorry for this man? “I know you’re used to ordering people around, but I don’t wear a uniform.”

  His lips thinned, then turned down into a frown. Oh, he didn’t like that, not one bit. Too bad.

  “It’s just that Judson is returning Monday and he’s anxious to meet you.”

  “Judson? Returning?”

  “He flies C-130s.” The way he puffed his chest out made her think that meant a lot to him.

  “That means nothing to me.”

  He frowned. “You don’t care what kind of job he has?”

  She took exception to the fact that he seemed to think he had a right to judge her. Why would it matter what some random dude did? Only that he was her brother—no, half-brother. Dammit.

  “Sunshine?”

  She blinked and realized she had been standing there thinking about what to say. Mainly because she had no idea. And she was doing it again. She mentally shook herself.

  “No. What I mean is, I have no idea what a C whatever is.”

  His expression lightened. “It’s the bigger planes that look a little more like airliners.”

  She nodded. She really didn’t know what that meant but it was a big plane. She knew that.

  “And he really wants to meet you.”

  “I…”

  She couldn’t decide. Her heart said to give her brother a chance, but her head was telling her something very different. Getting to know her siblings would lead to knocking down the barriers she had erected against her father. Did that make her a bitch because she threw a chance away at getting to know her siblings just to make sure she protected herself?

  He sighed, his eyes turning a little sad. Don’t fall for that, Sunshine. Still, she knew that he was definitely hurting. “I understand that you’re never going to be my biggest fan, but your siblings had nothing to do with it.”

  Dammit.

  “I…I still need more time.” His lips thinned again, and he opened his mouth to argue but she rushed ahead to stop him. “I promise I’m not trying to be mean. I just need to decide if this is good for me.”

  He nodded. “Please let me know as soon as you can.”

  She nodded but said nothing else. He walked away, and she had to fight her soft heart. It wanted her to call out to him, to make him feel better, but she had to make sure to protect herself.

  She walked to her door, no longer feeling happy and light like she had when she left work. Her father and her siblings were like an anchor around her neck. No, not her siblings, she thought as she unlocked her door and stepped inside her house. They were not to blame any more than she was. Meeting them would be like a reminder of what she would never have. She knew her mother had given her the support and love that Sunshine needed when she was younger. Until dementia had taken her mind, Sheila Foster had been Sunshine’s biggest supporter, and there was no doubt in her mind she still would be that way.

  She wondered what her mother would think of her relationship with Nando. Her mother hadn’t said much about her father when she was growing up. The most she said was that she couldn’t have regrets about him because she had Sunshine. What would she say now? Would she warn her away from Nando?

  From the moment they’d met, they seemed to be on some kind of fast track. Maybe it was time to slow down. It wasn’t what she normally did. She was a free spirit, except when it came to her heart. That was the one thing she guarded because she had learned that a broken one was worse than going through life alone. She didn’t know her mother before her birth, of course. Mary had told her that she and her mother were alike in many ways, but not others. Her mother had constantly had issues with money. They always had plenty to get through the month, but her mother hadn’t been particularly good at saving. The only thing that she had done was take out an extremely good life insurance policy, which had been left for Sunshine.

  In other ways, they were the same. She worried that her free spirit had led her down the same path as her mother. Nando was a good man, and there was no doubt that he would never cheat on a woman. It just wasn’t in his makeup.

  But…he might break her heart. Not on purpose, but this couldn’t go on forever. He would have to leave some day, and while she would love to be a person who could just move…it wasn’t good for her.

  She sat down at her kitchen table and sighed. Sunshine didn’t even know where this was all going, but for once in her life, she was truly worried. Was it because all the other men she had dated—not that there had been that many—had never been able to capture her heart the way Nando did? Is that what was worrying her? Nope, that was a joy to feel. He was almost too perfect.

  On the other hand, it would never work out in the end. He was military and was committed to serving. Hell, his entire freaking family were military, and most of them were still serving. The problem with simply letting things go on was that her heart was involved now. Hell, who was she fooling? Her heart had been involved all along. That was why she resisted him.

  She snorted. Yeah, some kind of resistance she’d put up. Still, she wouldn’t regret it. She couldn’t.

  She heard Nando pull up outside, but she sat there, still trying to push the conversation with her father, and the guilt that came with it, to the side. Tonight was about the two of them, and she would not let that part of her life intrude. It was definitely something to worry about, but a man was coming to cook for her.

  The door opened and Nando stepped through.

  “Hey, you,” he said. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded. “Just a long day.”

  He set the bags on the island and leaned down to cup her face. The kiss he gave her was filled with passion and understanding. The backs of her eyes started to sting. She opened them as he pulled back.

  “Sunshine?”

  She shook her head. “Just one of those kinds of days.”

  He looked far from satisfied but was apparently going to let it go.

  “Why don’t you go have a hot, bubbly bath? I’m going to make a pasta dish for you tonight.”

  Dammit. The man was just going to steal her heart.

  “Come on,” he said, pulling her up and out of the chair. “Get naked and get into the bubbles.”

  She nodded as he led her down the hall.

  “I’ll come get you when dinner is done.”

  “Okay.”

  He left her alone and she closed the door. She stood there for a few seconds, trying to wrap her mind around what had transpired. Did she continue on with Nando and risk a broken heart? Did she merely dump him and protect herself?

  She sighed. Neither choice was a good one. So for now, she would let those thoughts simmer while she soaked in the tub and had dinner with the man who was quickly stealing her heart.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Nando wasn’t sure what was wrong, but he knew something was bothering Sunshine. He had wanted to blame it on her father--because that was one man who should take responsibility for a lot of things--but he didn’t think that was the problem. She seemed to be preoccupied, and he didn’t know how to get her to talk.

  He’d tried the direct approach, but she had shied away from his discussion. In fact, he was desperate to find out what she was thinking and worried that he might be losing her.

  He didn’t know why, but he felt her slipping away from him.

  He’d spent the night over at her house. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence these days. It had been a month since they had started sleeping together. She refused to sleep at his cottage because of the boys. Not that they would know, but he let her h
ave her way. Mainly because he loved her house. He was sitting outside having his coffee, the sounds of birds and scents of a Hawaiian morning around him.

  “Hey, there,” she said, coming out of the house. She was wearing the cute little robe he liked. He had used that sash to tie her up to the bed last night and do all kinds of naughty things to her.

  “Good morning.”

  “You should have gotten me up.”

  “I thought about it, but I don’t have time to play this morning.”

  She smiled as she took the seat next to him. She had a coffee cup with her.

  “I wouldn’t want to make you late for work.”

  He leaned forward and took her free hand.

  “I was thinking.”

  “That can be dangerous.”

  He smiled, but he knew it didn’t reach his eyes.

  “What is it?” she asked, setting her mug down on the table and facing him.

  “I was thinking that maybe we need to talk about us.”

  He didn’t like the way her face went pale.

  “What about us?”

  “I thought we could take another step forward.”

  “Step forward,” she repeated.

  He nodded, knowing he was freaking her out. Even so, he believed in the band-aid rule. Rip off that bandage.

  “How about we move in together?”

  She blinked. “What?”

  “Why don’t we move in together?”

  “You want to move in with me?”

  “You don’t have to make it sound like that.”

  “I’m sorry. I just...I haven’t lived with anyone before. Like with a guy.”

  “I haven’t lived with anyone either.”

  This hadn’t been his plan to begin with, but he thought that maybe she might need a step in between what they had now and marriage. If he sprung marriage on her, she might just run in the opposite direction screaming.

  “I just...I don’t know, Nando.”

  What did he expect?

  “Your answer is no?”

  “No. My answer is I don’t know. I have to think about it.”

  “Never mind.”

  He rose, but she grabbed his hand. “Hey, wait.”