Cast in Shadows

by Laura Landon

  “Perhaps,” she answered. “But you didn’t.”

  “But I could have.”

  “Just as I could be run over by a team of runaway horses the next time I go to the village. Would that be your fault if I were on my way from there to visit you?”

  “That’s different.”

  “I don’t see the difference. I see either one as a possibility, and if God intends to take me to heaven today, there’s nothing either one of us can do to prevent it.”

  “Do you really believe that?”

  “Of course I do. Our lives are in His hands. So we’d better make use of the time He’s given us here. And that means finding out what’s causing your seizures.”

  Eve walked across the room until she stood in front of him. She extended her hand to him. “You’re not strong enough to be up, yet. Take my arm and let me help you back to bed.”

  Gideon noticed she extended her right arm, not her left, and he rose from his chair and took it. He walked with her back to the bed but before he sat, he gathered her very gently into his arms and held her. “You are a remarkable woman, Eve,” he said, making sure he didn’t hold her too tightly. “I’m not sure what I did to deserve having you in my life, but I’m eternally grateful.”

  Before he released her, he tipped her chin and kissed her, first on the forehead, then on the lips.

  He knew he should order Thomas or Matthew to remove her from the cottage and never allow her to return, but he wasn’t brave enough to go through even one day without her. He wasn’t strong enough to survive without her strength and companionship…and affection.

  He kissed her again, this time with more passion than before. He knew he shouldn’t. Knew that nothing could come of a relationship with her. How could it? It was likely that he wouldn’t survive his next seizure. But the words she’d said earlier echoed in his mind. We needed to make use of the time we’d each been given. And for Gideon, that meant enjoying every moment he had with Eve.

  . . .

  Eve sat in the study of the house where she and her father lived and went over the papers she’d taken from Gideon’s cottage, then she went over the list she’d made of possibilities as to what to do next to help Gideon. She couldn’t help thinking that something triggered his seizures. Something he either drank or ate. Something they hadn’t considered. At least she prayed that was it.

  She went over the journal he’d kept concerning everything he’d done each day, everyone who’d visited him, everything he’d eaten, and what he’d had to drink. Nothing looked suspicious, though she couldn’t help but think the answer had to be here somewhere.

  She stared at the papers in front of her, then looked up when the study door opened and her father entered.

  “Are you still up, Eve?”

  She smiled at her father when he entered the room. “No, I’m really sleeping soundly in my bed,” she teased. “It’s my twin down here. She couldn’t sleep and wanted to do some reading.”

  Her father laughed as he entered the room. He took the chair in front of the desk. “And has this twin of yours found anything interesting in Dr. Milton’s files?”

  The lightheartedness Eve felt only moments ago evaporated. “Father, may I discuss something with you? Something quite…ridiculous?”

  “Of course you may. In fact, with that intriguing preface, I insist you do.”

  “Before I begin, though, I need you to listen to everything I have to say, and keep an open mind until you hear all my facts.”

  “Like you needed me to listen to you and keep an open mind after what happened when Lord Sheffield attacked you?”

  “He didn’t attack me. He had an attack and I didn’t escape soon enough.”

  “Which is why my first thought was to forbid you to see Lord Sheffield ever again.”

  “Which, of course, you realized the folly in suggesting.” Eve placed her hand to her cheek. Her bruises had faded, but were still there. She remembered how upset her father had been when he’d seen them. And even how much more Gideon had been. “But, yes. Like that.”

  Her father relaxed back against his chair. “You know I’ll always listen to you, Eve. You’re as gifted in understanding the diseases of the mind as anyone I know, and no one has devoted more time and energy to discovering a reason for Lord Sheffield’s seizures than you have.”

  “But what I’m going to say is going to test even the faith you have in my sanity.”

  Her father lifted his eyebrows. “What have you decided to try now to help Lord Sheffield?”

  Eve smiled. “Am I that obvious?”

  “You are.” Her father sat in one of the two chairs that faced her desk. “And while the doctor in me finds that commendable, the father in me is concerned.”

  “There’s no need to be concerned, Father, I know what I’m—”

  “That’s my concern, Eve. I’m afraid you don’t know what you’re risking.”

  “I’m not risking anything,” she answered. “Are you worried that I’m not spending enough time with our other residents, because if you are—”

  “No, that’s not my concern at all. I’m well aware that Shadowdown was built by the Duke of Townsend, and that our main obligation is to take care of the Duke of Townsend’s son.”

  “Then what can I possibly be risking?”

  “Your heart.”

  Eve’s breath caught in her throat. It took several tries before she was able to answer her father. “I haven’t given Lord Sheffield my heart,” she said, although the sound of her words wasn’t as convincing as she would have liked.

  “Perhaps not yet, my dear. Or perhaps not completely. But even a blind man could see the attraction between the two of you. And it’s more than the attraction of a doctor for his or her patient. It’s the attraction of a man for a woman. And in your case, a woman for a man.”

  Eve couldn’t remain seated while her father made the comments he’d just made. Especially since she wouldn’t be able to deny them with enough conviction that her father would believe her.

  She rose from her chair and slowly moved to the window that overlooked the grounds at Shadowdown. From here she could just see Gideon’s cottage. In the daylight she could see when he was out working in his gardens.

  “I know nothing can come of any feelings I might have for him, Father. I have never fooled myself into thinking that if by some miracle I discover what is causing his seizures and cure him, that he will feel anything other than extreme gratitude. I know what he is. He’s the heir to the Duke of Townsend. Once he’s cured, if indeed that happens, he’ll return to the life he was meant to live. And that life will have no room in it for a country doctor who works with mental patients.”

  “But knowing this, and forcing your heart to accept the way things have to be can often be two completely different matters,” he said.

  Her father had risen from his chair and stood directly behind her. When she turned, his strong body and open, welcoming arms were waiting to envelop her.

  Eve took a step toward him and let him wrap his arms around her. “Why does it have to be like this, Father?”

  “Because the heart is not always wise. It makes decisions it thinks are best, but aren’t always. And allows itself to feel emotions that often expose it to pain and heartache.”

  “I’ve tried to keep my emotions out of my dealings with Lord Sheffield, but I’ve failed.”

  “And thank goodness you have.”

  Eve lifted her head and looked up at her father.

  “The doctor who can harden his heart toward his patients isn’t a doctor anyone deserves to have. The key is to always protect your heart, even when you can’t help but risk losing it.”

  Eve gave her father a strong hug and buried her face against his chest. “What would I do without you?” she said, lifting her head and kissing him on the cheek.

  “I hope neither one of us has to discover the answer to that question for a very long time.”

  “Me, too.”

  “N
ow, what have you decided to try next for Lord Sheffield?”

  Eve separated herself from her father and returned to her desk. All her papers were there. All her notes. “I want to try something rather drastic, Father.”

  Her father laughed a hearty laugh. “Why doesn’t that surprise me,” he said.

  Eve managed a haughty expression. “I can’t imagine.”

  “So what is this experiment?”

  “I’m going to limit everything Lord Sheffield eats and drinks. I’m going to ask his nurse, Lettie, to come each day and cook his meals for him. I’m not going to allow him to eat or drink anything other than what Lettie prepares for him.”

  “How long are you going to try this?”

  “A month. According to the records we’ve kept on him, as well as those he’s kept himself, his seizures recur every two to four weeks. We should know in a month if it might be something he’s eating or drinking.”

  Her father walked to the desk and gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “I hope you find the answer,” he said. “I know how much you want it.”

  “I do, Father. I really do.”

  CHAPTER 10

  Eve rose early the next morning and made her way to Gideon’s cottage. She couldn’t wait to hear what he thought of her idea. Couldn’t wait to see if he agreed with what she wanted to do. For the first time in what seemed forever, she felt as if they were taking a step forward. As if they were finally making progress.

  As soon as she received his permission, she intended to ask Lettie if she’d cook Gideon’s meals each day. If she agreed, they’d begin immediately. If she refused, Eve would talk to her father about securing one of the cooks from Shadowdown. Whatever Lettie’s decision, Eve intended to go forward with her plan. Something inside her was convinced that Gideon’s seizures were triggered by something he ate or drank. And if she was wrong, she’d search for another reason for his attacks. She refused to believe there was nothing they could do. Refused to accept that he was doomed to endure one attack after another—until one of the seizures finally took his life.

  As she neared the cottage, Eve saw Lettie approaching from the opposite direction. She carried a wrapped package and Eve knew it was something for Gideon. She took meeting Gideon’s long-time nurse on the way as a positive sign. Not only would she be able to tell Gideon what she intended to try, but Lettie would hear her plan at the same time.

  “Good morning, Lettie,” Eve greeted when she was close to Gideon’s nurse.

  “Good morning, Miss Cornwell. I’m surprised to see you out so early in the morning. Gideon says they usually keep you busy at Shadowdown until close to noon or later.”

  “That’s right, but I’m on a special errand this morning and want to speak with Lord Sheffield.”

  Lettie slowed. “Perhaps you’d prefer if I came to visit the master later. I can return this afternoon.”

  “No. What I have to discuss involves you, too.”

  Lettie’s eyebrows raised, but she didn’t say more. She walked with Eve the remaining distance to the cottage. Gideon met them at the door

  “Well, if it isn’t my two favorite women,” he said when they entered. He leaned over to kiss Lettie on the cheek, then reached out to take Eve’s hand.

  Eve didn’t want his touch to affect her like it did, especially after her discussion with her father. She didn’t want warm rivers of emotion to rush through her veins, especially after her father’s warnings to protect her heart. But such warnings were useless. Her body turned more heated than she’d told herself she’d allow it to, and her heart swelled with emotion from his nearness.

  “To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit so early in the morning” he said with a smile on his face.

  “I have something I’d like to discuss with you. And with Lettie.”

  His eyebrows raised just like Lettie’s had.

  “Would you mind if we went to the kitchen and I made some tea?” Eve suggested. “Then we can talk over my idea and you can tell me what you think of it.”

  “Sounds intriguing, doesn’t it, Lettie,” he said, extending his arm to his long-time nurse. “Shall we have some tea and see what Miss Cornwell has in mind for us?”

  “I’m right curious,” Lettie said, taking Gideon’s arm.

  “As am I,” he answered.

  Eve led the way to the kitchen, and Lettie and Gideon followed. Water was already heating and it didn’t take long to have tea in front of them. “I’ll unwrap these cookies and we can have them with our tea. Cook sent them over from Townsend Manor so I could bring them when I came. They’re gingerbread. His lordship’s favorite.”

  “No,” Eve said, extending her hand to stop Lettie from unwrapping the package. “This is part of the plan I’d like you to help me with.”

  “Your plan is to deprive me of my favorite cookies?” Gideon said, placing his hand over his heart in mock horror.

  “In a way, yes.”

  Gideon’s expression changed. “You’re serious,” he said with a frown on his face.

  “Yes. Please, listen while I explain.” Eve slid her cup from one spot on the table to the other. She wasn’t sure where to begin. “From the time I saw your first seizure, I’ve thought something seemed different from other seizures I’ve witnessed. I wasn’t sure what it was, but I noticed it again the other night.”

  Gideon’s expression turn darker. The furrows on his forehead deepened. “What are you saying, Eve?”

  “I’m not sure what this means, maybe nothing, but I think it might be important. I’d like to try something.”

  “What’s that?”

  “I’d like Lettie’s assistance in preparing your meals. I’d like you to eat nothing—absolutely nothing that isn’t prepared by her.” Eve turned toward Lettie. “If you’re willing to cook his lordship’s meals, that is.”

  “Of course I am.”

  Eve smiled. “Good. I’ve arranged for a wagon to pick you up each morning and bring you here. When you’ve prepared the food his lordship will need for the day, you can return home. It won’t be necessary for you to stay the night. His lordship can eat what you leave for his evening meals, and whatever bits of sweets you leave for him.”

  “If I leave any sweets, that is,” she said with a teasing smile.

  “Oh, Lettie. Surely you wouldn’t deprive me of my sweets.”

  There was a twinkle in her eyes when she answered him. “We’ll have to see,” she teased. “You’ll have to be on your best behavior if I’m to be leaving any sweets.”

  Gideon laughed. “This is exactly what she was like when I was young. Always threatening to withhold my sweets if I wasn’t good.”

  “It was the only way I could get you to behave most days.”

  “That’s not true,” he said with an affronted expression. “I was an angel nearly all the time.”

  Lettie released a loud hrumph that made them all laugh. It felt good to laugh. There’d been so little to laugh about where Gideon was concerned.

  “Can we start tomorrow, then?” Eve asked Lettie.

  “We can start today,” she answered, “since I’m already here. I’ll make his lordship some of my special stew, then, just perhaps, if he’ll pick me some apples, I’ll make a nice apple cobbler. I happen to know that’s one of his favorites, too.”

  “Find me a basket,” Gideon said, rising to his feet. “I know where to find the best apples in England. Come, Miss Cornwell, I’ll show you where they are.”

  Eve got to her feet and turned to Lettie. “I’ll have Thomas bring the wagon around shortly. He’ll take you to the village to get whatever supplies you need for the next week or two.”

  “Don’t you worry, miss. I’ll be sure his lordship eats well enough.”

  “And please, return these cookies to Townsend Manor. Tell Cook his lordship appreciates her thoughtfulness, but that you’ll provide all the food he needs from now on.”

  “Of course, miss.”

  Eve thanked Lettie, then turned to st
ep through the door Gideon held open for her. They walked to the other side of the cottage where Thomas was coming from the stable, and instructed him to take Lettie to the village, then they turned in the other direction, and walked across a meadow.

  Eve wanted to skip across the open meadow. The day was perfect. The sky was a brilliant blue, the breeze blew softly, and the sun shone down from above. “Everything is perfect,” she said, turning a circle in the tall grass. “I’ve never been this far from Shadowdown,” she said when they reached the middle of the meadow.

  “Not too many people have. They don’t let the residents of Shadowdown wander this far from the manor.”

  “It’s beautiful,” she said.

  Gideon took her hand and led her around a clump of blackberry bushes, then farther into the glade of trees.

  Eve stopped. “Oh, look at all the fruit trees!” She rushed forward and picked the first apple she could reach. “Look how big.” She took a bite. The juice from the apple ran down her chin and she swiped at it with her fingers. “This is delicious.”

  “Here are some peach trees,” he said pointing to his right, “and cherry trees, and even a pear tree or two.”

  “I think you are very fortunate, my lord. Lettie will be able to keep you in cobblers and pies forever.”

  “Hopefully I won’t be here that long,” he said, pulling an apple off one of the higher branches.

  Eve turned her head. The serious expression on his face tore at her heart. “I’m sure you won’t. I think you will be enjoying peach pies and apple cobblers at Townsend Manor by Christmas.”

  The look in his eyes brightened. “You really think this is going to work, don’t you?”

  “I refuse to believe it won’t. And you should, too.”

  He dropped his head back on his shoulders and laughed out loud. “How can I doubt there is hope when you are so positive?”

  Before she realized what he intended, Gideon reached out and pulled her to him. Then he wrapped his arms around her and swung her in dizzying circles. “Oh, Eve. You’re so good for me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”