He pulls me to him, and I let myself melt against his chest.
“That’s not fair to you. Nothing about this has been fair to you, and I’m so sorry for that,” he says.
“I was waiting for you to call,” I whisper. “I was afraid you weren’t going to. I thought you might…”
“What?”
“I don’t know. I thought you might not want to be in this with me.”
“There’s no one on earth I’d rather be in this with.” He pushes a lock of hair behind my ear. “I see you every time I close my eyes, Kendall. Every time I hear music playing, I think of dancing with you in the chef’s kitchen.” His hand slides to my waist and he sets us swaying slowly. “Every time I smell fresh air, I think of walking with you on the beach. Every morning when I wake up, I remember what it was like to see your head on the pillow next to mine.”
I don’t know what to say. Everything he’s saying is in line with everything I’ve been thinking and feeling over the past few weeks.
“Too good to be true,” I whisper.
Chase shakes his head. “I don’t believe in ‘too good to be true’ anymore.” He lifts my chin with two fingers and captures my mouth with his, his tongue exploring, and I yield for him.
I lose track of time as we rediscover each other, falling into our passions, taking our time. Our lovemaking is slow and intense, unhurried. We cling to each other for minutes at a time, hardly moving, then setting leisurely rhythms that have both of us gasping in desperation. Eventually we can’t control our pace anymore, and we grind into each other almost frantically, chasing release. When we’re finished, both of us are too tired to move from the living room floor to the bedroom. Chase reaches up to the couch and pulls down a blanket, draping it over us.
I’m not quite ready for sleep. My body hums blissfully, satisfied and exhausted, but my mind is alert. “Chase?”
“Hmm?”
“What happens now?” I ask. “When we go back to Chicago. What’s next for us?”
Chase leans in and presses his lips to the side of my neck. His kiss is warm and comforting. “Everything,” he says quietly. “Everything is next. You and me together. A home. A yard. Maybe a dog?”
“A dog,” I agree.
“And a family.” His hand finds the swell of my stomach. “A baby.”
“A miracle,” I whisper.
He nods. “Our miracle.”
Chapter 22
Kendall
Five Months Later
In the ninth month of my pregnancy, everything is a struggle.
It’s hard to stand up. I have to use both hands to lever myself up and out of bed in the morning, and the contortions I have to perform to rise from a comfortable armchair are so ridiculous that I could probably sell tickets to the show. Fortunately, I have help now. I don’t know how I’d manage if I didn’t have Chase by my side in these final days.
But I do.
It seems as miraculous to me as the fact of the baby itself. That all of this could have happened for me when I was least expecting it is almost hard to believe. Every morning I wake up and see his face in bed beside me and I feel a rush of intense joy. He’s here. It actually happened. We’re together. Often, I reach over and touch his face before he wakes, enjoying the way he can still make my heart flutter.
I’ve never known love like this before.
After Chase came to meet me in Boulder, things happened very quickly for us. I said goodbye to my apartment and moved into his place, which was bigger and had plenty of room for our growing family. Chase and I began converting his spare bedroom into a nursery. Since I’d decided not to find out the gender of the baby in advance, we chose a neutral color—forest green—and put some decals of friendly looking wild animals on the walls.
We went shopping together for a crib and onesies and a changing table and got the room all set up to welcome our new addition. It was the first thing we did together as a couple, and we laughed every time it occurred to us how strange and out of order our relationship had been.
The baby’s room wasn’t the only part of the house that got an upgrade, though. I came home from working on an assignment at a coffee shop one day to find Chase giddy and excited. He took me by the hand, led me through the bedroom, and stood me before the walk-in closet we share.
“Open it,” he urged.
I did so and gasped. Chase’s side of the vast closet had always been packed with fancy suits and linen pants, outfits for every occasion. But my side had been largely empty. My small clothing collection couldn’t fill the huge space available. But now, dresses, skirts, pants and tops hung all down the row.
“What is all this?” I asked.
“I took some of your things to a designer friend of mine and he sized some of his pieces for you,” Chase said. “Consider it a housewarming gift.”
“It’s too much.” I ran my hands along the fabrics. “They’re so beautiful.” I pulled out a pale lavender dress with a halter neck. “I’m not going to be able to wear any of these for months,” I added.
Chase grinned. “That’s what these are for.” He pushed a few hangers aside and showed me a small set of clothes. “Maternity things.”
I had to admit, I hadn’t found any maternity clothes I really liked so far. They were all awkward to wear, slightly uncomfortable, or pinched at me unpleasantly. I turned in his arms and kissed him.
“Thank you,” I said when I pulled away. “You don’t know how much this means to me.”
“Hey, it’s a gift for me too,” he said, smiling. “I get to see you wear them.”
I smile at the memory now. I’m easing my way into one of my maternity dresses, a flowy pink chiffon number with long, off-the-shoulder sleeves. It’s my favorite of the maternity clothes Chase bought for me, but it’s so fancy that I haven’t yet had any occasion to wear it. Tonight will be the perfect night for it, though. I pull it gently down over my belly, careful not to damage it. Then I turn and look in the mirror.
I feel like a goddess.
My hair falls in loose waves over my shoulders. The dress drapes attractively around me, giving just a hint of my pregnant shape. Pregnancy has given unusual shine to my hair and color to my cheeks, so I look young, healthy, and radiant. I smile slightly, and even that looks wise and knowing somehow.
“Just about ready?” Chase steps into the room behind me. “Oh, wow.”
“This dress is really something, isn’t it?” I turn and look over my shoulder, trying to see it from behind.
“It’s not the dress, it’s you.” Chase steps up behind me and wraps me in his arms. “I saw that dress a dozen times on the hanger, Kendall. It was just a piece of pink fabric. But with you in it…” He leans down and presses his lips to my neck.
I hum pleasurably. “You’re too good to me, did you know that?”
“Not possible.” He kisses his way along my shoulder, then down my collarbone. His hands slip up from my stomach to my breasts, which have grown full and heavy. And sensitive. My knees begin to buckle as he traces his thumbs across the thin fabric of my dress. “We don’t have to go out tonight,” he murmurs in my ear, his voice deep and husky.
“Chase…”
“We could stay here. Just the two of us.”
“I thought you wanted to see me in the dress.”
“I see it. It’s beautiful. Now let’s see you out of the dress.”
I feel like my skin is about to catch fire. It’s all I can do to keep from losing control. “We have a reservation,” I remind him breathlessly. “We’ve been waiting weeks to get into this restaurant. We’ll have plenty of time…after…”
“You’re going to make me look at you in this dress all the way through dinner, huh?” Chase dips one hand down the neckline of my dress, finding bare skin beneath.
“You’re going to kill me.”
He kisses the back of my neck. “All right. Let’s go eat, if that’s how you want it. But after dinner—”
“After dinner there�
�s no force on earth that’s going to keep me off you.” I turn to him, grab the back of his neck, and pull his head down to mine, devouring his mouth with a kiss.
He gives in to me for just a moment, letting me take the lead, but then he pushes back and takes control of the kiss, backing me gently into a wall, driving his tongue purposefully into my mouth.
He lets me go. “Finish getting ready and meet me in the living room,” he says with a wink, and strides out, leaving me gasping.
* * *
Our reservations are at a fancy steakhouse that just opened a month ago. Chase was only able to get us in here because he knows the owner from some business deal or other. It’s an aspect of life with Chase that has taken some getting used to. He knows people who can put us in contact with all kinds of unique perks and experiences. My closet, it turns out, was the tip of the iceberg.
Because the place is so new, everyone is as dressed up as we are. I can tell tonight is a big deal for every guest at the restaurant, and as hard as it was to leave Chase’s arms and drag myself out, I’m glad we came. Our server leaves us with a smile and a pair of menus, and the two of us begin to look things over.
“Make sure you don’t order your steak rare,” Chase says.
He’s protective to a fault sometimes, and I have to laugh. It’s true that a rare steak could be dangerous to the baby, but I’m the one who originally told him that. I don’t mind, though. It’s sweet how hard he’s trying to take care of us. I know he’ll be a wonderful father.
My stomach twinges unpleasantly. Oh no. I’ve had bouts with indigestion over the past few months, and I really hope that’s not happening tonight. I’d hate to sit here picking at what I know will be an amazing meal because my stomach hurts too much to enjoy it.
Chase seems to read something on my face. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, I just—ow.”
He nearly kicks over the chair in his rush to get to my side. “What is it?” he asks urgently, hands on my shoulders. “What hurts?”
“I think it’s indigestion,” I say, taking a drink of water to try to settle my stomach. “There are antacids in my purse.”
“I’ll get them.” He grabs my bag and starts digging.
“Ow!” I grab the edge of the table and double over.
This pain is worse than the last two, worse than any indigestion pain I’ve ever had. For a moment, I can’t speak. I hear Chase beside me, begging to know what’s wrong, and I feel his hands on my back and on my forehead, but I can’t respond. All I can do is gasp for breath.
Finally, the pain subsides. I rest my head against Chase’s firm abs. He strokes my hair, speaking softly.
“Baby, I think we might need to skip dinner.”
“What? No!” I protest. I might be in pain, but I still have an appetite…
“Kendall, I think you might be in labor.”
His words cut through the fog of my thoughts, and suddenly everything is crystal clear.
Labor. The baby’s coming now. Tonight.
“The hospital,” I breathe.
Chase takes my elbow and helps me to my feet. “You read my mind. Come on, let’s get to the car.”
I breathe deeply, trying to manage the pain.
“We’re going to be parents,” I say.
“I know.” He stops and kisses me, just briefly, then wraps an arm around my waist. “Let’s keep moving. You don’t want to give birth on the floor of a steakhouse, do you?”
I laugh. “No.”
My labor pains increase as we make our way to the hospital, and by the time we arrive, I’m howling. The nurse takes one look at me and seats me in a wheelchair, hustling me off to a room with Chase trailing in our wake.
“You’re delivering fast,” the doctor tells me after performing an exam. “This is going to be over in a couple of hours.”
In the end, it doesn’t even take that long. Forty-five minutes after arriving at the hospital, I give birth to my daughter. She’s beautiful, healthy, and enraged at the fact that she’s out of the womb. The doctor cleans her up and places her in my arms, and I feel as if my heart is going to burst with love.
“She looks just like you, don’t you think?” I say to Chase. I’m unable to tear my gaze away from my baby’s face to confirm the theory, but those are definitely his eyes.
“I think she looks like you,” he whispers reverently. “She’s beautiful.”
I move over a little so he can sit on the bed beside me, and we hold our baby together. “This is exactly what I wanted,” I tell him. “This is what I dreamed of. When I came looking for you to tell you about her, this is how I hoped things would end up. But I never dared to believe it could really happen.”
“Anything can happen.” Chase kisses my temple lightly. “I don’t think anything is impossible anymore. Not after this.”
After a while, a nurse comes to take the baby to the nursery. I hate to see her go, but the truth is that I’m exhausted and ready for a nap. Chase pulls the hospital chair up beside the bed and curls up in it, and I close my eyes and let the excitement of the day wash over me. I have a daughter. Chase and I have a baby girl. Nothing will ever be the same now, but I can’t imagine anything in the world that would make me happier.
* * *
“She needs a name,” Chase says.
Our daughter has been returned to my room so that we can practice breastfeeding. She’s taking to it pretty well, thankfully. Every nurse who’s come to check on us has praised her.
I smooth the tuft of light hair on top of her head. “We should call her Mariel,” I say.
“Mariel Harker,” Chase tests the name.
I like the sound of it coming from his lips.
“That’s pretty,” he says.
“Aunt Mariel is almost like a second mother to me,” I say. “And she was the first one who realized I was pregnant. She knew even before I did.”
“Wow. That’s some powerful intuition.”
“She also supported you and me being together from the very beginning,” I say. “She was the one who nudged me into finding you and telling you about the baby when I wasn’t sure yet what I wanted to do.”
“Well, thank you for that, Aunt Mariel,” Chase says, smiling. “So she told you to bring me to Tala?”
“No, that part was my idea.” I grin up at him. “But Aunt Mariel was the one who told me not to give up on you, if I really wanted to be with you. Once we got the call from the fertility clinic confirming you were her father, Aunt Mariel told me that if you didn’t call, I should go to you and tell you how I felt.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” Chase says.
“You are?”
“I’m glad I had the chance to do it first,” he clarifies. “I made you work too hard. I’m glad I had the chance to show you how much I love you, how much I want us to be a family together.”
I rest my head on his shoulder. “I’m glad too,” I say softly. “I’ll never forget opening the door to that cabin in Boulder and seeing you on the other side. That was the most romantic moment of my life.”
Chase rubs a thumb across our daughter’s soft pink cheek. “So, Mariel, huh?”
“I don’t think our family would be together if it weren’t for Aunt Mariel,” I say.
“It’s a beautiful name,” Chase says. He leans in and kisses the baby gently on the forehead. “Hello, baby Mariel. Welcome to the world.”
“I love you, baby Mariel,” I whisper.
Our daughter yawns and her eyes drift closed. Soon, she’s sleeping in my arms.
“I’ll have to call my aunt,” I say. “I have to let her know that the baby is here.”
Chase nods. “But not now.” His fingers play through my hair as the baby sleeps. I feel blissful, surrounded by my tiny, perfect family.
“I never thought I’d have this,” I tell him. “I was so focused on work, it seemed like falling in love wasn’t in the cards for me. But Aunt Mariel…she always believed. She didn’t want me to end u
p alone. But she knew. She knew that sooner or later, one of them would be the man.” I sigh, wondering at how well everything has turned out. “She knew all along.”
“I love the relationship you two have,” Chase says. “And she’s a very wise woman.”
“She is. As soon as the baby’s old enough to travel, we’ll have to go visit her, okay?”
“Back to Applewood,” he laughs. “Back where we first met.”
“I bet she’d even watch the baby for an evening, if you wanted to take me out to a movie,” I say.
I’m flirting, but the idea of leaving my daughter with anyone—even with my aunt, who I trust more than almost anybody in the world—is terrifying. I hold her closer and look down at her beautiful face. She’s the most important thing in my world.
Well, her and Chase. His arms are around both of us, creating a safe haven for us. I relax into his broad chest.
“Can you believe we’re parents?” I ask.
He kisses the crown of my head. “I never would have believed it. I never thought I could have this.”
I understand what he’s saying. He thought he was infertile. He had accepted that reality. To be holding his baby daughter in his arms now must feel like a fantasy come to life. I didn’t honestly think I had love and parenthood in my future, but at least for me it was always a possibility. For Chase, though, it would have seemed as unlikely as sprouting wings and taking flight. But now, here she is. A perfect baby girl.
“Have you thought of a middle name?” he asks, placing a finger in her fist.
“I haven’t,” I say. “Do you have any ideas?”
“Tala,” he says. “For the island where we found each other again. For the place I discovered I was going to be a father.”
“You didn’t believe it then,” I say. “If you want to name her after the place you realized you were going to be a father, you should call her Chicago.”
The Baby Miracle Page 17
