Beyond the Dream Catcher

by Rita Hestand

  She was a breed!

  It was a nightmare. Just like her dream had been heaven, this was the hell. Why did you have to have one without the other? A heaven and a hell!

  But what worried Katherine was her mother. Could it have happened as Hawks said? Could that be why her mother seemed to hate the Indians so? She could understand that now. And if she was part Indian, it might explain her coloring, and her ideas about the Indian people. An Indian. She'd never once thought of such a thing. Could it be true? Was there anyone that might know the truth? She needed to find out. Somehow, she had to know for sure.

  She didn't want to think of the Indian girl and her father together. But it brought memories of the few precious moments she had with Chase in her dream. It had been so real, so compelling. How could a dream be that way? Moments she would never take back no matter what the consequence. She had loved a breed even if it was just a dream, it had been so real, but it wasn't important that he was a breed. He was a man. The most man she'd ever known. And to think him dead…unthinkable. And the dream was much more than a dream, for she had seen for herself, he had really touched her, somehow.

  Part of her screamed it was all just a bad dream and she would wake up soon. She hadn't done anything. And she wasn't an Indian. Hawks was lying. He wanted her to doubt herself was all. She couldn't let him know he'd succeeded.

  Suddenly Chase's face came to mind. The dream had been so real that when she woke, she felt as though something had happened to her. It had been too real. And now she knew in her heart, she had made love with him.

  She couldn't think of it. Wouldn't. He was alive, somewhere, she had to go on hoping.

  Katherine couldn't believe her father would do anything so terrible. And her mother captured by the Indians. Surely Hawks was lying. But the longer she thought on it, the more she realized Hawks might have spoken the truth. For there had to be money and her father must have hid it. Whether he was the robber or not, she did not want to know. And she would not contemplate herself as an Indian, until someone confirmed it, she was white.

  ***

  The next day Hawks made her walk the rest of the way to the station. The wind was barely moving, she could taste the heat in her mouth, her tongue like sandpaper. Her hair was ringed in sweat. She tried to take enough time to pull it back and braid it but Hawks was having none of that and pushed her until she fell. She scraped her hands against the grains of sand and cried out for water. Even though the dust no longer bit into their skin, the heat replaced it. Sweat trickled down her back, making her dress cling to her. Her feet and legs ached from walking so much, because Hawks couldn't slow down. The dust coated everything, her clothes, her hair, her mouth. She needed a bath. Just the thought of the old tub she used at home made her ache to be there.

  When they finally reached the station though, she looked at the burned out place with dead eyes. She couldn't go back to living like her and Joshua lived. Joshua, she hadn't even thought about him in hours. Was he dead too! She couldn't think of it now. Seeing the home place burned to the ground made her weep. She had stopped thinking rationally hours ago. The sun weakened her. Katherine felt herself losing her sanity.

  What she once called home was a shell of ashes now. Nothing had been spared. Just as Chase told her it would be. Chase!

  He was her one hope. But the odds of him surviving were slim. He had no horse, no way of escaping. But she didn't think him dead. She felt she would know somehow.

  Hawks looked around, going over the entire yard before he ever looked at her. There was no grass, just dust, and the sparse line of willows at the creek that ran near by. The only thing that welcomed was the old oak tree that stood out like a sore thumb as though it didn't belong here.

  They'd used the creek water when they first came here, but it too was drying up now to only a trickle. But it was the strength of the tree that overshadowed the house like a mighty fortress; it was the old oak tree. And how it had gotten here was a mystery no one could answer. Did the farmer from Mississippi really bring it, or had it been here all along, from many centuries ago? It was a beautiful sore thumb.

  Katherine smiled because it was untouched from all the other things at the station. It still majestically swept over the remains. Katherine ran to sit under it, soaking up the reprieve from the hot sun, the tree providing an oasis. The graves reminded her she sat among her own parents now and there was some comfort to that. She had to quit worrying about the dead. She was alive and she had to stay that way. She had to think about herself now. "Can I have some water now?"

  "Okay, now you tell me where the money is and everything is gonna be all right." Hawks took the canteen and went to the creek to fill it with water. Coming back he nodded, and joined her at the base of the tree.

  "I'm tired, can we rest first?" she stalled him.

  "Once we get the money, we'll rest." He chuckled.

  "I'll have to study on it, for a while. It's been so long." She lied. Maybe if she played along, he wouldn't get so mad and be so rough with her. She had to survive this somehow.

  "All right, we'll have a drink, and you can think on it. But remember my patience runs mighty thin sometimes. So don't think too long." He laughed.

  She took the canteen he offered, and drank until he pulled it away. "Why did daddy do it?" she asked softly. Not wanting to know, yet having to know. She still wasn't convinced Hawks was telling the truth.

  "Every man has a reason fer doin' bad, at least the first time." Hawks seemed to study her for a minute. "Yore daddy had a weakness. He loved yore Mama with a passion. He was sorta obsessed with her. Aw yeah…he took the Indian girl a time or two, but it was your ma he loved. He was jealous of that Indian chief. Yore Ma cut him off a time or two and yore dad didn't take to that much. No man does. He only took my squaw when your ma thought she was pregnant again, the first time at least. That was for sure and certain. At least at first that was her excuse. He wanted to give her better than what he had, since she came from pretty prominent folks back in the east. Least that's what he told me. Oh, he could provide for her well enough, but he could not give her what she was used to."

  Hawks went to his horse, loosened the reins and pulled the saddle off him. "So one night, he occasioned the bar in town, and we talked. Yore dad was a talker when he drank. I had to watch him 'cause a time or two I was scared he'd tell everything we done. Course, I'd have never known all this if he hadn't been drinkin'. It didn't take much convincing that he needed big money to do what he wanted. So he joined me in my plan to rob the bank. He actually took the idea over. We figured it out to the last detail. Yore daddy was smart like that. He could plan such things. Guess he was good at it. When the time came, I could depend on him to kill anyone who got in the way. You'd have never knowed he could kill so easy like, but he did. Yes siree, cold-blooded son of a gun. Despite the fact that he was a good daddy, he was an outlaw too. Sometimes you don't see the bad, 'cause he don't want you seein' the bad. He loved yore Ma and you kids. But, he shot the Deputy, that's why they kept after us so long. Dern near had us that first day, but an old farmer hid us out. Said he didn't like banks anyway."

  Katherine took this story in with trepidation. The way Hawks said things made her feel very leery about her father now. He couldn't be making it all up. Could he? Could her father have been that cold hearted? Not the man she knew. She wanted to think Hawks was lying, but the more he talked, the more it all made sense. And taking the Indian girl, could he have done that, too? She'd seen her father look at her, and how the Indian girl smiled around him, but at the time she marked it up as being friendly. Her Pa always fed her and sent her home with Hawks with plenty of food. But what Hawks was saying was ugly. And that wasn't the way her father was. But she didn't know what to believe.

  "Did the Deputy die?" Her voice sounded raspy now.

  "I reckon he did or they wouldn't have kept at us so long. I expect it must have been pretty bad as mad as they was. The deputy was pretty wet behind the ears, just a kid."
/>   "Is this why you been watching our place so long?" She looked at him now. "For the money?"

  "Yep. Been waiting fer my chance. Didn't know about them soldiers, thought you were diggin' fer the gold yerself."

  "Hawks for the last time, I didn't know about all of this…"

  Chapter Sixteen

  "My patience is a wearin' thin, girl. You gonna tell me where he hid that money or not?" Hawks asked, his gun in his hand.

  "I don't know where it's at, Hawks. It's the honest to God truth," she cried as she sucked in air and prepared for the inevitable. "I knew nothing of this. It's all so shocking."

  "If I'm lying why would I have you out here diggin' in the dirt? Ever think about that? I ain't here for my health. Now, you dig 'til we find it." Hawks nodded. He handed her the shovel she used to bury her folks.

  "You just get started, anywhere you want to. It's here somewhere, that much I know." He nodded.

  "You want me to dig?" she twisted her head in puzzlement at him as she sat in the shade against the barn wall.

  "That's right. While I sit here in the shade and watch. You get tired enough and hot enough, you'll dig in the right place," He declared with a chuckle.

  "What makes you so sure it's here?" she questioned.

  "Where else would he put it? I been all over the valley checkin' in banks and stuff to see if he left anything. Not one cent. So it's got to be here on this land he refused to leave." Hawks chuckled again as though pleased with himself for figuring it out. "You think he cared about this piece of dirt? Naw…he buried that money here, that's why he didn't want to leave."

  "Maybe the bankers didn't want to tell you," she quipped.

  "Nope, they would've told me. I told them your Ma and Pa were laid up with the fever and dying and you and the kids were alone and needed that money. If there'd have been any, they would have come forth with it. Nope, he didn't put it in no bank. He buried it, right here."

  Katherine shook her head, "How could you know that?"

  "'Cause I knowed yore Pa. He didn't want to set foot off this land. Not as long as I was around. And the reason is the money is here, somewhere. So dig, girl. Quit wasting time."

  Slowly she began to dig. At the time it didn't matter where. She had no idea where the money might be, even if there was any. But Hawks thought she did and as long as he thought so he wouldn't be killing her.

  Hawks stood over her, scratching his chin, watching her. "This ain't where he buried it."

  "No?" she asked staring at him, as the sweat trickled into her face, stinging her eyes. "Then where?"

  "I don't know, but it aint here. Jest look, it's in plain site of the doorway. Why how could he have done that? He couldn't that's how. This ain't where it's at. You better think and think straight, girl," Hawks said as he pushed at her.

  "Why don't you figure it out and tell me where to dig?" she suggested as she gained her balance once more.

  "Don't get smart with me, you little whipper-snapper. You just dig, 'til I tell you to stop."

  "But Hawks, I don't know where it is," she insisted.

  "That's okay. We can stay here 'till we find it. Ain't in no hurry." Hawks snickered.

  "Maybe you should be. Anyone finds out you killed the Tyler boys they'll be after you. That was a dumb mistake, Hawks. You should have brought them along, and they could have helped us dig."

  Hawks scratched his chin. "Yeah…you're right about that. But nobody's gonna worry about them Tyler boys. It will look like the Indians did it. So I ain't gonna worry about that. But I got my rifle. If anyone comes I'll just have to shoot them if they cause me any trouble," Hawks decided.

  "Did Pa ever say anything about hiding the money?" Katherine kept stalling him. "I mean, did he say he buried it?"

  "Nope, said he had it hid and nobody would find it," Hawks said.

  "Then what makes you think we'll find it?"

  "'Cause if we don't, you are a dead woman…" He snickered again and went to sit down on the porch once more.

  Katherine kept digging in the heat. She was exhausted, but she knew she couldn't stop. She saw Hawks expression changing every few minutes. She wouldn't be surprised if they both didn't have a little delirium from the excessive heat.

  If her Pa really did steal from the bank in Missouri, he buried it here. Was there a logical place to look for it? She couldn't believe all the things Hawks said about her father. However, Hawks being here, bent on finding the money led her to admit to herself it might have happened.

  Her father had been such a wonderful man. She couldn't believe it of him. And yet, if there was money here, Hawks wasn't lying. She hoped she didn't find any. And yet, it niggled in the back of her mind, if it wasn't here, why would he be wasting time here when the law would soon be after him for the killings?

  She looked around the entire yard, and nothing sparked a memory. Not once had her father said anything about the money or a bank or even hinted at something this bizarre. It hurt to think of him this way. She wanted to deny it, but the longer she dug, the more she began to realize Hawks was probably right. Her father had been a thief. If Hawks hadn't lied, then what he said about her mother was probably true too.

  Oh it was too hot, she couldn't think straight any more. Her mind was rambling.

  For her own sake she needed to find the money if she could. Hawks might kill her, and she suddenly realized she did not want to die.

  Chase Rivers had given her much more than his love in her dream, he'd given her hope and she couldn't lose sight of that no matter what. She wanted to live now and she would work hard to do just that.

  Where could her father have buried the money though? She wanted to think like him. She looked around the entire yard, realizing how big it was. Would it be possible to find such a thing? How long would Hawks give her before he grew impatient?

  As she took a sip of the water from her canteen she gazed about. He couldn't have buried it out in the middle of the yard without someone seeing him, so he must have buried it further from the house. She glanced about the barn. Maybe there, she decided.

  "Where you goin' girl?" Hawks demanded as she took up her shovel.

  "Pa wouldn't have been burying it in plain sight of everyone. He'd have had to do it away from the house. I thought I'd try around the barn. If he buried it there, no one might have noticed. He was always at the barn tendin' the horses and greasin' axles and stuff. And he admired this tree more than anything, because it kept the barn so cool."

  "That's good thinkin' girl. Yes siree, that's good thinkin'," Hawks agreed. "Wouldn't have been as noticed either, would it? Good thinkin' girl."

  Satisfied she had quelled his curiosity, she decided to make a way around the barn. The dirt seemed a little softer here too.

  Hawks followed her and began walking about the barnyard. When he began yelling, she ran to see what was going on.

  Hawks was smiling and pointing at the fresh dirt. "Lookie here, maybe this is where he buried it."

  Katherine shook her head, "No, that's where Joshua and I buried the soldiers."

  "What soldiers?" Hawks demanded.

  "The ones we killed," she said quiet calmly.

  "You killed?" Hawks repeated, his eyes going wild now. "You mean, you really did kill them soldiers like the Captain said?"

  "Yes, that's why the Captain wanted me and Joshua to go to the fort with him. Yes, I killed one in self defense."

  Hawks took her by the arms and shook her. "You ain't makin' no sense, girl. C'mon, let's get out of this heat a minute. Don't want you gettin' touched in the head from the heat, now do we?" He pulled her to the shade of the old oak and sat her down, then got her some water. "Now, what you talkin' about, girl? What soldiers did you kill?"

  "The stage was comin'." She began as she gulped the water he offered her. "And Mr. Bowlins had three passengers. Chase Rivers was the prisoner, and two soldiers."

  Hawks eyed her. "Must have been while I was out musterin' with the Tyler boys."

  "I do
n't know. I was too busy to pay attention to you on the ridge," Katherine explained.

  "So you saw me up there did you? You didn't let on you seen me. Well, go on, tell me what happened?"

  Katherine shrugged, told Hawks the whole story about the soldiers and how they died. It was obvious Hawks knew nothing of this from his expression of surprise.

  "Sounds like self defense to me," Hawks said after a long quiet moment.

  "Yeah, but the Captain didn't see it that way. You see Josh and I tried to bury them, but we were bone tired and we didn't dig deep enough. The ground was hard, just like it is now. Digging took too much effort. So when Chase recovered enough, he took the bodies out and put them on the stagecoach, made it look like the Indians did it."

  "That's a pretty clever stunt. How come it didn't work?"

  "Yeah, but they had dirt in their mouths from our buryin' and someone at the fort realized it and the Captain was made a laughing stock. Now he's out for revenge, himself. It doesn't matter why they were killed, only that they were killed, and they were United States soldiers."

  "I don't think you'll have to worry about the Captain any longer. He's probably dead," Hawks said with little regard for them.

  Katherine didn't want to think about the shack, because thinking about it meant realizing her brother could be dead too. And what of Chase? Was he dead too?

  Her head pounded from the obsessive heat.

  "Hawks, I'm gonna pass out if it gets any hotter. Could I just curl up here and take a short nap? I'll work harder, if I have a nap," She said, curling almost into a ball against the barn wall where it was shady.

  "Sure, have yourself a nap, but I'll expect more work from you when you get up." Hawks pulled his hat down over his own eyes and closed them.

  "Thanks…" she barely uttered as her eyes closed.

  Moments later she was dreaming and it was the kind of dream she never wanted to wake up from. She was with Chase. They were riding into a beautiful valley where a waterfall ran into a spring. Hurriedly she tried to tell him about Hawks, about the money, but she said nothing of her mother. She couldn't. That was too new.