If You Only Knew (Harper Falls #3)

by Mary J. Williams

“Bright boy.”

  Tyler kissed him hard. It was fun being the aggressor. She liked being in charge. Her fun lasted about ten seconds.

  Drew easily flipped Tyler around until she was under him.

  “Party pooper.”

  “Play time’s over.”

  He slid into her, one fluid movement that had them both gasping with pleasure. Tyler arched her neck. She reached for him, her hands finding his strong arms.

  “Look at me, Ty. Keep your eyes on mine.”

  That was a request Tyler found she was happy to comply with. The intensity of the deep chocolate color had her sinking faster than the movement of his body over hers. He told her things in those few moments that she wasn’t ready to hear with words. They made her breath catch. Her heart melt.

  “Drew.”

  “Shh.” He kissed her long and deep. “I know, Ty. I know.”

  Unlike earlier, this was a slow ride. There was no need to hurry. No feeling of desperation. They could take their time. Touch. Explore.

  Drew held Tyler’s hips, maintaining their connection, as he slid to the side until they were on their sides. Lifting her leg, he draped it over his hip, beginning a gentle, almost lulling rhythm. She liked this position. Face-to-face.

  It was surprisingly satisfying. Every time he moved, he seemed to touch someplace new, someplace no one else had ever come close to.

  “You like that?” Drew asked after she gasped with pleasure.

  “You know I do.”

  “How about that?”

  Tyler moaned. Just a gentle thrust, a slight change of angle. It sent a shiver through her. It vibrated down, enveloping Drew’s cock.

  “Holy shit, Tyler. What did you just do?”

  “I was about to ask you the same question. Don’t stop. Never let it end.”

  That was like asking the earth to stop turning. The end was inevitable. But they made it last as long as they could. Long, easy strokes became a bit faster. Warm, gentle kisses grew harder, almost fierce.

  Tyler’s hand dug into Drew’s arm pulling him, urging him on.

  Drew’s fingers cupped Tyler’s ass, bringing her closer with each thrust of his hips.

  At the last moment, they froze, just for a second; crystal gray eyes locked on molten brown. They cried out together. They fell into bliss as one.

  “HOW MANY TIMES do I have to say it?”

  “Since you love the word, you might as well give it another go. Maybe this time will be the charm.”

  It was five o’clock. In the morning.

  An ungodly hour as far as Tyler was concerned. She might stay up to see the sunrise. Getting up an hour before was just plain foolish.

  “Tell me again why I’m tying my shoes in the dark?”

  “Because you’re too stubborn to turn on a light?”

  Drew flipped the switch next to her head, the bedside lamp illuminating her hands and foot.

  “Well, sure. Thank you, Thomas Edison.”

  She moved to the other foot, securing the laces with a quick bow.

  “I told you to stay in bed. The race won’t start for another three hours. And since you’ll be here, locked inside, you could have slept through the whole thing.”

  “Now he’s a comedian,” she said to no one in particular.

  “Be reasonable.”

  “Not a specialty of mine. Sorry.”

  Tyler buttoned up her jeans. She had traded the groupie girlfriend clothes for sneakers, jeans, and a t-shirt. She felt a slight twinge of regret over her choice. In her defense, yesterday when she had packed I’m With Asshole seemed appropriate.

  “Lovely.”

  “Hey, I was going to wear it inside out. If you reconsider, so will I.”

  “Enough.”

  Drew took her by the shoulders. He was frustrated so he refrained from shaking her. He did give a look that had made men bigger than himself think twice about taking him on. Naturally, Tyler was not impressed.

  “Give me three good reasons why I can’t go with you.”

  “I’ll give you ten.”

  “Jesus, Drew. Stop being such an overachiever.”

  “Make me laugh. I haven’t done nearly enough of it in the past ten years.” Drew kissed her nose. “I won’t cave, Ty. Not over this one.”

  “Then don’t race. You don’t need to prove anything. If Tripper needs the money, write him a check. Hell, I’ll write him a check. If it’s too dangerous to take me along, don’t do it.”

  She had a point, Drew thought. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t considered packing it in and heading home. Whatever thrill these races once provided had waned long ago. The time before the last one was supposed to be the last one. All the crap with Regina, his mixed up feelings for Tyler, sent him back.

  He won the race but couldn’t have cared less. If Jack hadn’t given him a shitload of grief, that would have been that. How screwed up was it for him to enter this race just to throw a symbolic middle finger at his best friend? There wasn’t even any satisfaction since Jack didn’t know. Screwed up? More like morbidly twisted.

  “You know what? Never mind.” Tyler turned away, gathering up her things. She threw the few items into her bag then went to the bathroom and cleared it out.

  “Tyler.”

  “Drew.”

  “If I don’t do this, it will feel like I quit because you made me.”

  “Oh, my God. The male ego. Infinitely big and just as indecipherable.”

  “It is what it is.”

  “Idiot!” Tyler threw her bag into a corner. “Fine. Go. But if you get killed, don’t come crying to me.”

  Drew was flabbergasted. Was this really going to be their first fight after ten years? It appeared so. He wasn’t backing down. Tyler had her back to him, stiff as an iron rod. Sometimes there was no figuring life out.

  “I’m not going to die.”

  Drew waited. Nothing. It seemed she’d had her say.

  He grabbed his gun and keys. He threw one last look her way.

  “Keep the door locked.”

  “Fuck you.”

  “Promise me, Tyler.”

  “If I don’t, will you have to stay?”

  “Are trying to piss me off?”

  “Yes.”

  “Mission accomplished.”

  Drew wrenched open the front door, ready to storm out. Clenching his fist, he turned back.

  “I know you aren’t stupid, Tyler. I’m going to rely on that and assume you will stay in here, door locked.”

  “It was pretty stupid of me to come after you.”

  “Stubborn.”

  Tyler just pointed at her t-shirt then at him.

  Instead of slamming the door, Drew shut it with an almost imperceptible snick. He wasn’t ten steps away when the door flew back open.

  “Damn it, Tyler.”

  Drew whirled around ready to have it out. Those three words were as far as he got.

  Tyler threw herself into his arms with a jump, her legs wrapping around his waist. She peppered his face with kisses then hugged him close.

  “Don’t die. Promise me you won’t die.”

  Drew held on, his face buried in the side of her neck. He inhaled her warm, citrus scent with long, deep breaths.

  “I promise to stay put, door locked. Promise you won’t die.”

  “Tyler. You are enough to drive a man to drink.”

  “Promise.” She tugged on his hair, pulling his head back for a long, passionate kiss.

  Drew was in no hurry. He let the kiss go on and on until she was ready for it to end.

  After a while, when his lips were free, he said, “I promise not to die, Tyler.”

  “Tell Tripper I’ll track him down if he lets anything happen to you.”

  “He’s already half-afraid of you. That threat ought to push him over to downright terrified.”

  “You joke, but I’m dead serious.”

  “I know it.”

  He smoothed back her hair, letting her feet drop to the ground
but not quite ready to let her go.

  “One hundred miles. Fifty there, fifty back.”

  “Okay.”

  Drew gave her a light kiss on the end of her nose before watching until she was inside and the door firmly shut. He didn’t try the knob. She promised to lock the door; it was locked. And it would stay that way.

  TYLER REFUSED TO pace.

  Instead, she sat, fidgeted, and tapped her toe. She rearranged Drew’s cupboards, cleaned the bathroom, and dusted everything within an inch of its life. Unfortunately, it wasn’t a very big area. When she was done and looked at the clock, an hour had passed. One lousy hour.

  How long did these races usually take? She should have asked. Grabbing her phone. Looking it up would kill a couple of minutes.

  Thinking for a moment, Tyler remembered her iPad was one of the things she had so unceremoniously jammed into her bag. The bag she had then thrown across the room in anger. Great. Poor tablet. There was a good chance it had been taken down by friendly fire. Just an innocent bystander. A casualty in a senseless war of wills.

  Okay. She was officially going around the bend. At least there was no one around to witness her descent into silliness.

  Now, where was she?

  That’s right. IPad. Bag.

  She turned towards the bedroom only to freeze in her tracks. Someone was trying to get into the RV. The rattling of the doorknob made the hair on the back of Tyler’s neck stand up.

  Looking around for something she could use as a weapon, her eyes skipped over the broom, a dustpan, and a long metal rod that seemed to have no particular purpose. It would do in a pinch but was unlikely to stop an assailant for long. Especially one who was bigger and stronger.

  Furniture polish. That had to hurt if sprayed in the eyes, right? There was bleach, but she would have to toss that. Too iffy. Pledge it was.

  Standing to the side of the door, Tyler held up the can, ready to do battle.

  Thank goodness she hesitated. Just for a second.

  “Drew?”

  He stepped into the RV looking exactly as he had when he left. No blood, no broken bones. Relief flooded her body.

  “If you plan on polishing my knob, I’d prefer you used your mouth. That stuff stings.”

  “Precisely the point.

  Tossing the can away, Tyler walked into Drew’s waiting arms.

  “You didn’t race.”

  “Nope.”

  “For me?”

  Drew held her tighter.

  “For us.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  “HE JUST WALKED away?”

  “That’s it. No more racing. No more taking stupid chances.”

  “Because he loves you.”

  Tyler hesitated. Love. After all they had been through, why was that the thing that made her nervous? Dani and Rose wanted their friend to have what they had. Men who loved them beyond all else.

  If there was one thing Tyler had learned, it was that nothing was guaranteed. There was a time she would have sworn Drew was her present and her future all rolled into one. Ten years and a broken heart later, Tyler no longer believed in a sure thing. She wasn’t getting ahead of herself this time. Day to day. It was her new mantra.

  “We aren’t quite there yet.”

  Rose patted her hand. No one understood better how difficult it was to commit fully to another person. Luckily, Jack had been unwilling to take no for an answer or she might still be alone, convinced that love was not for her.

  “Give it time. You’ll get there.”

  Rose had invited them all to dinner. She was trying out a recipe Jack’s mother had assured her was failsafe. She loved her future mother-in-law, trusted her. Still, when it came to the guest list, only friends were present for what she hoped would be her first successful, grownup sit-down meal prepared entirely by herself.

  If it turned out to be inedible, they could share a good laugh and order pizza.

  “I think you’re worried for nothing. It smells amazing.”

  “Maybe.” Rose bent down to peer through the glass door of the oven. “Jack’s mom was very encouraging over the phone. Of course, this is a woman who doesn’t understand the concept of not being able to cook. She’s a master. Her daughters and granddaughters came out of the womb knowing the difference between a whisk and spatula.”

  “There’s a difference?” Tyler asked. She poured herself some more wine before steering Rose away from the kitchen and back to the living room.

  “My question exactly. She seemed to think I was making a joke so I went along with it.”

  “Sit.”

  Dani patted the cushion next to her.

  “I know I’m being silly. Dinner will be fine. No. It’s going to be great. I just wish Jack could have been here a little earlier, for moral support. He always makes cooking fun. If something gets burned or dropped, he laughs it off. I’m the one who gets tied up in knots.”

  “Where are the guys?” Lila Fleming, Alex’s sister, sat in a plush chair next to the fire. Jack’s dog Edgar, a favorite of them all, lay with his head resting on her feet. He’d had a busy day protecting the yard from squirrels and was content to sleep while his Rose entertained her friends.

  “I think Jack is kicking Drew’s ass down in the gym at H&W.”

  Tyler snorted. “In his dreams. You may think he’s a superhero. I say Drew can take him, any day, anytime, anywhere.”

  Lila was new to the group so it took her a moment to decide if Rose and Tyler were actually arguing. In her experience, women could get fierce about their men. Especially with other women.

  She shouldn’t have worried. There was a definite twinkle in the eyes of the two friends. Make that three friends. Dani wasn’t going to let her man’s fighting skills go unremarked.

  “Alex is an ex-Army badass. He has the scars to prove it.”

  “Two votes for Alex,” Lila chimed in. Though come to think of it, she had no idea what they were voting for. “Why am I voting for Alex?”

  “Because you’re a good sister and we have hot men who we like to brag up,” Dani laughed.

  “They aren’t really fighting?”

  “I doubt it, Lila.”

  “I don’t,” Rose said with a shudder. “Ninety-nine point nine percent of the time, Jack is this easygoing, unflappable sweetheart. Piss him off? Scary. One time I walked in on the aftermath. Jack took down guys that had him by over fifty pounds. Blood, crying. It was pitiful.”

  “You thought it was hot.”

  “Okay,” Rose conceded. “We had wild shower sex while those poor guys were still trying to get back on their feet.”

  “They are friends, right?” Lila found it all a bit confusing.

  “And partners,” Tyler nodded.

  “Tell her what happened,” Dani urged. “Tell us all. You’ve been pretty vague about your trip to Mexico. Time to spill.”

  “We just got back yesterday. When have I had time to do more than give you a rough outline?”

  “You have plenty of time now. Wait a sec.” Rose jumped up and grabbed the open bottle of wine, giving everyone a refill. She plopped back down next to Dani, a look of anticipation on her face. “Go.”

  Laughing, Tyler started at the beginning, as much for her own benefit as Lila’s. It had been such a whirlwind; she still tried to wrap her head around some of it.

  Almost an hour later, she sat back. It was an amazing story. Full of action, adventure, intrigue, laughter, sex. Her friends were particularly interested in the sex. Then the ending where the man sacrifices his last race to be with the woman he… cared about. Pure gold. Better than a Hollywood rom-com any day.

  “I give it four and a half wows.”

  “Why not five?”

  “Because,” Dani said. “He still hasn’t told you why he did what he did.”

  “That’s as much my fault as his.”

  “Why?” Rose asked. “He’s ready to talk… finally. Suddenly you aren’t ready to listen?”

  “I know. I w
ish I had a simple answer.”

  “Give us the complicated one.”

  “I’ve been letting myself remember what it was like when Drew and I were together. I told you that.”

  “Yes. Those memories helped you lose all the anger you have carried around.”

  “For the first time in a long time, I could look at Drew without seething. I like how that feels.”

  “We like how it looks on you.”

  Surprised, Tyler turned to Rose. “How it looks on me?”

  “Is that the right way of putting it?” Rose asked Dani.

  “Sometimes, not always, you seemed sad,” Dani explained. “More so in the past few months when you’ve been pushed into Drew’s company.”

  Rose nodded. “Before I got involved with Jack, it was easier for you to avoid any contact. Suddenly, he was everywhere. I know you acted like it pissed you off.”

  “It did,” Tyler insisted.

  “Yes. It also made you sad. The pissed off suited you. That was healthy. It even brought a nice rosy glow to your cheeks.”

  “Well, crap.”

  “Like the one you have now.”

  “Go on, I’m fascinated.”

  “Uh oh.” Dani turned to Lila. “Tyler likes to think she’s tough as nails. Let me tell you a secret. She’s a marshmallow. Cries during greeting card commercials, coos over pictures of puppies.”

  Tyler sighed. Her friends could be royal pains in the butt. Good thing she loved them.

  “I think you’re straying from the original point.”

  “No, just setting the scene. As hard as you try, my friend, it’s impossible to always hide the sad. Seeing Drew brought you down. Rose and I are ecstatic to see you happy again.”

  “I am happy,” Tyler nodded. “If I hear what Drew has to say, I might lose it. I don’t know if I can stand another broken heart — the same broken heart that is finally starting to heal.”

  “Oh, Tyler.” Rose felt her own heart tighten in sympathy. “I understand the need to keep the past in the past. I can speak from experience. Once the air is cleared, you will knock this two-ton weight off your chest that you hadn’t realized was there.”

  “Tonight. We’ll go to his place. Finally, everything can be brought out into the open. Let the chips fall where they may.”

  “It will be fine, I know it.” Dani patted her knee. “And, you can tell us what Drew’s house looks like.”