Pride's Run

by Cat Kalen

  When Andrea reaches for her beer can a flash of orange light from the blazing fire dances on her ring. As I stare at it, taking in the pretty diamond stone, it instantly reminds me of my mating dress. Unease moves through me as I think about the elders, the puppies.

  When she notices my interest she looks at me and smiles. “Pretty isn’t it?”

  “It’s gorgeous,” I say to cover my sudden discomfort.

  A smile lights her face and travels all the way to her big brown eyes as she holds it out in front of herself to examine.

  “It’s a promise ring. We’re going to get married when we graduate college.” She turns to Jack and they exchange a kiss.

  “Get a room will you,” one of the boys blurts out and everyone laughs.

  As I stare at the diamond I can’t help but think how much I long to be a normal girl, long to love someone, long to be loved, like Andrea. But I’m not a normal girl, I quickly remind myself. And I never will be.

  “It’s a small diamond,” Jack says almost apologetically.

  “Don’t be silly. It’s not small.” Andrea wiggles her slim fingers. “It’s perfect for my hand.”

  Jack shrugs it off and says, “But when I become rich and famous she’s going to need a wheelbarrow to carry her engagement ring around.”

  With that everyone laughs and Jack turns his attention to us. “So what about you guys? You both off to university in a few days, too? Getting one last party in?”

  Instincts take over and I lean toward the fire to warm myself as I recite my standard story. “No, I’m a junior at Olympic High and Logan is a senior. We were on a nature hike until our things got stolen.” I smile at Logan and when I look at him expectantly, he takes the cue.

  Logan winks at the group then growls as he plants a warm kiss on my cheek. His tone is light and conversational when he says, “Well actually we’re just getting away from the parents to have a little…quiet time…if you know what I mean.”

  When the boys let loose a cheer and raise their drinks, I clue in to what Logan means by quiet time. My cheek burns where he kissed it and my spine quivers as I think about such an intimate act with this big bad alpha.

  Taylor winks back. “Hell yeah, we know what you mean. And don’t worry. I have a spare pup tent you two can borrow. Very small, if you know what I mean.”

  As I think about sleeping in such a confined space with Logan, my heart misses a beat, my stomach flutters strangely, and beads of sweat break out on my body.

  A cool breeze fans the fire and the flames lick the sky. Needing to think of something else, I glance upward and take in the stars. Just then a low howl rents the air and everyone tenses.

  “Hey did you hear about the wolves on the loose?” Taylor asks.

  I lower my head and work a strip of bark free from our makeshift bench as Logan plays it cool and says, “No, never heard.”

  “Yeah, we ran into some gaming officers who warned us. They also left us a card to call if we catch sight of them.” He pulls out his blackberry and holds it up. “Not that we could get a signal out here.”

  “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about,” Logan says and brushes it off, but I can feel his tension and hear the strain beneath his words. “They’re probably more scared of us than we are of them.”

  As everyone nods in agreement, Taylor relaxes a bit and says, “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

  Trey, a very nice looking boy with midnight shoulder-length hair and a somewhat stocky build reaches for a cooler. His voice is rich and deep when he says, “You guys must be hungry.”

  I inhale the lingering scents around me and despite the grumbling in my stomach I say, “We don’t want to take your food.”

  “Don’t worry. We have plenty.”

  When I offer him a grateful smile, his brown eyes widen and I get this strange vibe from him. He’s not dangerous, but he has this hyper energy about him.

  “How do hot dogs and s’mores sound?” he asks.

  Hot dogs sound great but I’ve never had s’mores before. I wonder if that’s the deliciously sweet smell that’s been teasing my hunger.

  “Sounds great,” Logan answers in a possessive voice that I’ve never heard before. As Trey approaches, Logan shuffles closer to me, until our bodies are practically meshed together. I hear a low growl in his throat but can’t figure out what’s threatening him. Alpha or not, I jab him in the ribs to calm his wolf.

  Trey grabs two long skewers and comes closer. He plunks himself down beside me and passes out the sticks. Danielle, his gorgeous girlfriend who looks very much like the bubbly cheerleader type, reaches for another beer and I notice the way she wobbles slightly as she watches us from across the fire pit.

  I place my can of beer on the ground beside me and Logan takes it and moves it to the other side of him. We exchange a knowing look and it becomes clear to me that with each passing moment we’re getting better and better at reading each other.

  Logan takes a small drink from his can, then when no one is looking pours the rest out. I guess he doesn’t want to run the risk of lowering his inhibitions either because we need to keep awake and alert if we want to survive out here.

  After we take our skewers, Trey tears open a new pack of hotdogs. He holds the package out and Logan grabs one to put on the end of his stick and as I’m about to follow suit, Trey closes his hand over mine.

  “Here let me help you.”

  I’m quite capable of doing it myself but I don’t want to offend anyone so I let him. He shifts a little closer to me and keeps his hand over mine. He pierces the hot dog and holds it over the fire.

  While I cook my food the boys strike up conversation, but I don’t miss the tension emanating off Logan as he watches Trey. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he was about to shift and pounce. Something about Trey threatens his wolf, but I can’t quite figure out what it is.

  Keeping one eye on me, and the other on the group, Logan joins the conversation. The girls look bored as the guys talk about cars, recent movies, sports, and some ultimate fighting show they all watch on TV. As I listen, I’m not at all bored. What I am, however, is surprised by how much Logan knows. I’m also surprised by the possessiveness in his glance whenever he looks at me.

  Once my hot dog is cooked, I begin to nibble on it, taking my time so I don’t come off like a starved dog. When Danielle clears her throat loudly, Trey slinks back to her, leaving the package of hot dogs behind. Danielle speaks to her boyfriend in whispered words, but with my trained ears I’m able to hear them, and what I hear startles me.

  Flirting with me?

  Is that what she thinks he was doing? When hunting for my master, I’ve flirted with guys to gain their trust, but a guy has never flirted with me before. I turn to Logan, who has also been listening. He nods his head at me and he seems highly agitated when he whispers, “What you were sensing was his interest in you.”

  Before I can respond, Brittany, a pretty petite blonde, who appears to be the same size as me, jumps up and her green eyes are alive with laughter when she says, “Time for more s’mores.”

  “Haven’t you eaten enough?” Janie asks, laughing. “Not that it matters, you skinny bitch.” Then she rolls her blue eyes and turns them on me. “I suppose you can eat all you want and never put on a pound either.”

  I know she’s teasing, but I’m not sure how to respond. Brittany comes to my rescue.

  “Ignore her. She’s been on a liquid diet and it’s making her insane.”

  I look Janie over. She is tall, gorgeous, and curvy in all the right places. She’s everything I’m not, everything I long to be. I frown, confused by such behavior. “Why would she be on a liquid diet?”

  “Because she thinks she’s fat,” Brittany explains.

  My eyes widen and before I can help myself I blurt out, “She’s gorgeous.”

  “Okay, Pride, you’re my very new best friend,” Janie says and the girls all laugh.

  Brittany steps behind Logan to grab another
cooler. She pulls out supplies, hands them around and takes a seat next to him. She punctures her marshmallow, warms it over the flames then wraps it in chocolate and graham cracker.

  As we watch her eat, Logan stabs a marshmallow with his skewer and follows her lead. Within seconds it goes up in a burst of flames. He pulls it away and tries to wrap it in chocolate, only to end up with a hot mess on his hands.

  Everyone is laughing and I can’t help but smile at him. This skilled hunter who can slay a deer with his bare hands and chase off a mother bear is actually having a hard time building a s’more, which smells so amazing that I’m ready to scarf it down without even bothering to cook the marshmallow.

  When he hears me make a noise that resembles a laugh, he turns to me and runs his fingers over my face, coating me in chocolate. Everyone laughs harder and I stick my tongue out to taste the sweetness.

  My stomach howls for more. That has to be the most delicious thing I’ve ever tasted. I look at Janie. Why she would deprive herself of this is beyond me. Then again, I’ve been caged my whole life and don’t understand ‘high school girl’ way of thinking.

  As Logan licks his fingers clean, I look around at the group. Everyone is having such a good time it has my heart swelling in my chest. Once again I’m reminded that the young teenage girl inside me wants this, wants the normalcy of it all. Friends. Camaraderie. Laughter.

  But my gut reminds me of my mission. One I might not come back from. And I’d be smart to remember that emotions play no part in my game of survival. I sober at that last thought and Logan turns to me, sensing my mood shift.

  Brittany drops next to him. Still laughing and genuinely sincere she shoves another marshmallow onto his stick and gives him directions as she holds it over the fire.

  “Put the chocolate on the graham cracker and hold the sides open,” she directs.

  When Logan obliges, I watch Brittany lean close, her body is only inches from Logan’s and the clean scent of her skin wafts before our nostrils. I think of my own body, and how filthy I must look in comparison, and for the first time in my life I feel the sting of something new, something that could be jealousy.

  I take a deep breath, but can’t seem to fill my lungs.

  Needing escape, I climb to my feet. “I’m a mess,” I say, in my most even voice. “I need to get washed up.”

  Brittany glances up at me. “We found a nice hot spring over that hill.” She waves her hands in the direction. “It’s beautiful and warm. You’ll love it.”

  I turn to go but she says, “Wait, let me get you some clean clothes.”

  She comes back within seconds and hands me soap, sweat pants and a sweater. “These should fit. We look about the same size.” I look her over and realize that she’s small like me, but she doesn’t look like a runt at all. She’s cute, petite, and quite appealing. Is it possible that others see my runt body the same way?

  “Thank you,” I croak out.

  “My pleasure, Pride.”

  With a knot in my stomach, I make a turn to go but Brittany stops me. I turn back to her. “Great name by the way.”

  I smile, think of my parents, and vow to live up to their expectations. “Thanks.” With that I make my way to the hot springs, following her directions.

  When I find it, I strip and wade out until I’m waist high. I give a soft sigh and scan the tree line, my senses always perked for danger. But the warm water feels so glorious on my body it’s hard to concentrate. I spread my arms and watch the waves ripple around me, then using the soap, I begin to lather my grimy skin.

  As I wash the dirt from my flesh, allowing the sweet jasmine scent to fill my nostrils, I get the sense someone is watching me. I turn and see Logan standing at the edge of the pool.

  Gaze intense and pinned on me, his eyes glisten beneath the near full moon. My heart thumps fast as I watch him. He doesn’t ask permission to join me. Instead he sheds his clothes and stalks closer. A moment later he’s standing in front of me, and as our naked bodies almost touch I note there isn’t a hint of shyness about him.

  I begin to cover my flesh, but he captures my hands to stop me.

  “Don’t,” he says, and the intensity in his voice frightens me as much as it excites me. “You have no reason to hide from me.”

  A lump lodges in my throat and I have to force my words past it. “Logan-”

  “It’s okay, Pride.”

  “Logan please…”

  “Please what?”

  “I don’t want you to see me. I’m…I’m…”

  “You’re what?”

  “I’m not like the others.” I steal a quick glance at him and I know he can see right through me.

  Anger moves over his face. “We all have scars.”

  “Not like mine,” I finally say. “I’m not…right,” I say, not quite knowing how to say what I really feel. That I’m damaged and unlovable.

  “You’re wrong, Pride. What you are is beautiful. Inside and out.”

  I turn away, no longer wanting to meet his eyes, no longer wanting him to see my body.

  He takes hold of my elbow and turns me back to him. “Pride, you have nothing to be ashamed of. We’re naked in our wolf form, so why does naked in our human form bother you?”

  “I don’t know,” I manage to get out. “Being around you makes me so aware of my body.”

  “Your female body is beautiful, Pride.” His voice drops an octave when he adds, “And if you want to know the truth, it makes me very aware, too.”

  I look at him and can hardly believe what he’s saying. A deep, strangled sound rises from my throat. “Why are you doing this? Why are you being so nice to me?”

  He trails a hand over my arm and takes a measured step closer. “Because we need each other.”

  “But you’re an alpha. Alphas are never nice. They control and dominate. You even said so yourself.”

  “I have no reason to control or dominate you. I want us to be equals.”

  “Equals? How can we possibly be equals?” I ask.

  He gives a slow shake of his head. “You have no idea how special you are, do you?”

  My voice comes out a low strained whisper when I say, “You must be mistaking me for someone else.”

  “Oh, no, little one. Like I said before, there is no one else like you.” His soft voice wraps around me and holds me so tight it does the weirdest things to my insides.

  I feel his fingers on my flesh and as his hands trace my scars it produces an unfamiliar fullness in my chest. I shiver, completely unnerved by his touch. But oddly enough, this time I don’t find myself shying away from it, this time I find myself leaning into it, needing it, absorbing it and letting it fuel me in the most unfathomable ways.

  His hair falls forward as his eyes track my scars. Emotions move over his face and I wonder how this boy, this skilled hunter can be so ferocious in the wild yet be so soft and gentle with me.

  “You’re beautiful, Pride,” he tells me again as he takes the soap from me to wash his own body. “Didn’t you see the way those guys were looking at you?” A slow grin turns up the corner of his perfect mouth. “I thought I was going to have to go feral and fight them off.”

  A strange laugh rises in my throat. “I hardly think…” I begin, but my voice fails when he leans forward and presses his lips to the scars at the base of my neck. The warmth of his mouth burns my blood. I suck in a sharp breath and try not to explode into a million tiny pieces.

  He traces my scar with his lips, the caress meant to soothe the years of pain. “No one is ever going to hurt you again,” he growls under his breath and to illustrate his protectiveness he holds me tight. His glance moves over my face and specks of pewter dance in his eyes when he says, “If they try, they’ll have to go through me.”

  A strange noise rumbles in my throat as I gaze at him. I take in the fierceness in his eyes, along with his vow to protect me, and in that instant it becomes glaringly apparent that everything between us has changed. A shudder races throug
h me and there isn’t a thing I can do to stop the small choking sound in my throat.

  “Are you okay?” he asks.

  “Not even a little,” I answer honestly, my voice as shaky as my body.

  “Come here.” He pulls me impossibly closer, and hugs me to his body. Without conscious thought my arms circle his waist. His muscles feel hard beneath my hands and I realize it’s the first time I’ve touched his human body. As his scent curls around me and draws me into a blanket of warmth my low howl breaks the quiet of the night.

  He presses his nose into my hair and pulls in my scent as his fingers span the small of my back. This time I melt into him because I’m so shaken I can barely keep my legs from failing.

  Everything in the way he touches me, and everything in the way he looks at me has shattered my last vestige of control and I know in this instant, life as I know it will never be the same again.

  A moment later a branch cracks, breaking the spell, and we both tense. I turn in time to catch sight of a large raccoon as it darts into the underbrush.

  Logan clears his throat, and puts his mouth close to my ear. My body tingles when he whispers, “We should get back. It’s late and we need sleep.”

  Since I can’t find my voice I simply nod. He captures my hand in his and stays near as he leads me out of the water. We dress in silence and I notice how close he stands to me as we make our way back to the camp. When I see the small pup tent set up especially for us, it occurs to me we’ll be sleeping in tight quarters together—with both of us in our human form.

  My entire body tightens in a way it has never tightened before and a warm shiver of awareness hurries down my spine.

  I bite the inside of my mouth and slow my steps. As I stall I become acutely aware of the way Logan is watching me.

  I’m suddenly not sure if I want to crawl into the tight intimate space with him. Not because I don’t trust him, but because this time, I don’t trust myself.

  Chapter Twelve

  The murmured sounds of the hikers drift through the quiet night air as we all prepare for bed. Even though I’m pushed past my comfort zone, I try to act normal, try to pretend that crawling into bed with Logan is something I do on a regular basis. My insides, however, are in a complete uproar and the food I’ve eaten earlier has settled into a big chaotic lump in the pit of my stomach.