by E. R. Wade
She’s mine.
S
Mia
I open the front door.
“Jake, I –” But it isn’t Jake who’s leaning on the wall with his hands in the pockets of his jeans and staring at me.
“Mia,” Gavin says smoothly. There’s no outward reaction to my xxx.
Clearing my throat and injecting some happiness into my voice, I say, “Hey. I wasn’t expecting you.” I hope I sound pleasantly surprised because that’s what I’m aiming for.
“You were expecting Jake?”
“No,” I say shaking my head. “No. He called me a few minutes ago and I thought he decided to come here. I didn’t invite him over.” Am I protesting too much?
“He has your number?” Gavin’s gray eyes are trained on my face. What he really wants to know is how he got it and how long we’ve been calling and texting each other.
“Ana, Luke’s fiancée, gave it to him. He and Luke are brothers.”
“Ahh. I’m outnumbered,” he says. “I should have figured it out at the party.”
“Please come in.”
He enters into my apartment, and sits on the couch.
“Would you like anything to drink?”
“No. Thanks. Why don’t you sit down,” he says, gesturing to the seat beside him. I sit, but I have a weird feeling that he’s about to say something I won’t like.
“I came over to ask you if you wanted to go out to dinner but I think it’s better we don’t. You know we need to talk?”
He’s going to break up with me. I just know it.
“Gavin, don’t say it.” My voice is a whisper. He can’t break up with me, not now. Who else is going to help me get over Jake?
He takes my hand in his. “Why do you want to go out with me?”
“Because I told you I would. Because we agreed to be together.”
He nods. “So, it’s out of a misplaced sense of loyalty?”
“No, of course not. I like you. I want to be with you.” As soon as I say the words, I wonder if I’m trying to convince him or convince myself.
“I know you do, Mia. And I believe we could have had something great. But you’re in love with this guy and it means you can’t really move forward with anyone else until you get over him, if you ever do.”
“I’m not in love with him.” My voice sounds shrill to my ears. My heart is pounding so hard. Why the fuck would he say that?
Gavin doesn’t say anything but his brown eyes are intently on me. He’s studying me and it makes me uncomfortable. It makes me feel like he can see right through me. Like he can see that I’m lying about my feelings for Jake.
Finally, he breaks the silence. “I’m trying to be selfless and do the right thing here. You’re a lovely woman, Mia, and I like you a lot but I think you really want to be with him or maybe you need some time alone to figure out how to get over him.”
When Jake made love to me, I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Nothing in this world can be compared to how he made me feel that night. Absolutely nothing..
“Okay,” I whisper.
E
Mia
.
n.
N
Jake
“Where’s your boyfriend?” It physically hurts just saying it.
“We broke up.”
Really? “You did?” I’m surprised and filled with immense relief. I don’t wait for a confirmation. Hearing it once is enough for me. I smile widely at her. She has no idea how fucking happy this news makes me. “It’s for the best.” Gavin is much smarter than I gave him credit for.
Mia glares at me. “You know I’m right, baby. You don’t belong to him.”
She scowls at me. “I don’t belong to anyone.” I don’t bother responding to that. If she chooses to lie to herself, that’s her choice. Very soon she’s going to find out that she’s mine and I’m hers.
“Have dinner with me.”
“I’m busy.”
“I didn’t say when.”
“I assumed you meant this evening.”
I did but there isn’t any point telling her that. “Tell me when you’ll be less busy.”
“Jake –”
“Mia, why are you fighting this? We both know this is inevitable.”
“How do you know it is?”
“Because I haven’t gotten over you in two years, and believe me I’ve tried. From the moment I saw you, I knew that we’ll be a part of each other’s lives. I know you felt it too. And no matter how much you don’t want to admit it, I know you have feelings for me.”
“You don’t date.”
Her statement, so sure, surprises me. “Who says I don’t date?” I ask.
“I heard,” she says evasively.
“From?”
“Does it matter?”
“Well, you heard wrong. Why don’t you go out with me, and let me show you how much I’d like to date you?”
She hesitates. She wants to say yes. I don’t understand why she’s fighting it. Gavin – who by the way is no longer a douchebag – is out of the picture, so what could be holding her back?
“It’s just dinner, Mia.” Except for me, it isn’t. It’s the first of many dinners we should have had years ago. It’s a way we can find out how we can continue from where we stopped. It’s a way for us to continue our story from where we were interrupted. This will be the start of many dates, breakfasts, weekends away, and every single thing I was cheated out of with her.
“Okay.” [My expression doesn’t reveal it but I’m fucking relieved.]
“I’ll pick you up tomorrow at seven.”
.
T
Mia
Dinner was perfect.
Jake was attentive and charming.
We’re standing in the doorway of my apartment
I feel his finger on my chin and he gently pushes my face upwards until I’m looking into his eyes. He looks at me intently and then deliberately lowers his head. The moment his lips touch mine is the exact moment I stop breathing. Our surroundings fade into nothing. I lose all sense of time, and the fact that we’re standing in the middle of a busy sidewalk is lost on me. The only thing I’m aware of is his lips on mine. They are a mixture of hard and soft, a mixture of fire and ice. He kisses me gently, reverently. It feels magical. It feels like I’m in heaven. It feels like a first kiss. It feels like forever.
“Mia, tell me why you left. It’s been bugging me for two years, and I don’t understand why. You didn’t even leave a note.” (<- Edit) He gently tucks a lock of hair behind my ear. I can’t stop looking into his clear blue eyes framed with long, dark lashes. His gaze doesn’t waver from mine. The air around us pulses with emotion.
“Baby. Please.” His voice is soft, cajoling.
“I was scared,” I finally confess, the words coming out is a rush. “I woke up that morning and I watched you as you slept. You seemed too good to be true. Everything that we shared didn’t seem real. It didn’t take me long to convince myself that I was better off walking away with the memories we created. Leaving you was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. And I never stopped thinking about you even for one day.” My voice comes out soft and low, and it’s tinged with regret and sadness. I feel vulnerable, almost as much as I did that morning in Vegas.
“I never stopped thinking about you too,” he says. “Are you still scared?”
“A little,” I admit.
“Don’t be. You know I’ll never deliberately hurt you. xxx.” His voice is soft and sincere. “Ana, this isn’t about spending another night or a few more nights with you. I want a whole lot more than that. I want it all. I want your love and your trust. I want your future, and everything that comes with it.” I’m gaping at him, shocked. “We’re going to take it slow. I’m going to prove to you that we belong together and I’m here for the long haul. I need you to trust me. I never want you to walk away from me again.”
He cups my cheeks/face with his hands, and looks deeply into my eyes.
His lips, when they touch mine, are firm, soft and sweet. I melt into him and part my lips to deepen the kiss. He breaks the kiss, but holds my gaze.
“I love you, Mia.”
My body goes completely still. My heart thumps loudly, and the air leaves my body. I know I didn’t imagine what he said. I can’t stop staring at him.
I see only sincerity . . . and love in his eyes.
My mind is scrambling.
“How? When?” I manage to choke out.
“While I watched you sleep in my arms.” His voice is dripping with honesty. “I just knew you meant more to me than anyone ever had and would ever mean. I was going to talk to you about giving a relationship with me a chance when you woke up. I figured we could make it work. You’re mine, Mia, and I’ve been yours since that night.”
"I fell in love with you while/when I watched you try [to stay awake] not to sleep. You said you wanted to stay up and talk, and didn't want to waste the precious time we had left."
n.
ELEVEN
Jake
I didn’t plan to tell her tonight, but at that moment I didn’t want to let another minute go by without letting her know how I feel. I didn’t want to wait anymore. I’ve already lost two years I could have spent with her, and from now on, I’m not going to take any second with her for granted so I’m laying all my cards on the table.
I’ve never told a woman I love her, and I honestly never thought I would. But with Mia, the words came naturally. And I know that no one else will ever get those words out of me. She’s it for me. She has always been the one.
I saw the shock in her eyes when I said it, but besides the shock, there was also emotion. I don’t want to name it. I need her to acknowledge what she feels [it is] and then voice it. I’m not the most patient man, but I can wait. She’s worth it.
t.
TWELVE
Mia
Why am I fighting this? Why am I fighting my feelings for Jake? I’ve known for a long time that I’m in love with him. I’ve known that no other man will ever come close. I know I don’t want to be with anyone else. Even as amazing as Gavin was, I didn’t feel that strongly about him. He’s the first man I agreed to be with but I couldn’t take the next step. I had almost convinced myself to have sex with him. It was supposed to be on the night of Ana’s engagement party. Gavin didn’t put any pressure on me but I knew how much he wanted me in his bed.
[Jake holding Mia and walking back home from dinner.
“Mia.”
I turn slightly in Jake’s arm and look in the direction of the voice. Gavin. My smile dims a little.
“Gavin. Hi.” I haven’t thought of him once since Jake and I became a couple.
“Charlton
“Hunt.” Jake offers him his hand. [No hard feelings.] ]
s.
THIRTEEN
Jake
You
n.
FOURTEEN
Julian - Three years ago
I.
e.
FIFTEEN
Julian
.
.
EPILOGUE
Jake - Five years later
Cape Town.
I.
THE END
Thank you for reading Mia. I hope you enjoyed it. As an independent author, I rely mainly on word-of-mouth for gaining exposure so I would really appreciate it if you would consider leaving a review on Amazon or Goodreads.
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Read on for excerpts from the other two novellas in the Captured Hearts series, Rae and Ana, and excerpts from two stand-alone full length novels, Stay With Me and Lie With Me.
Excerpt: Lie With Me
Coming summer 2017
(This story is unedited, and is subject to change.)
Sean Connors
I fell in love with my best friend’s girl, Addison Walker, and left behind a trail of devastation. I broke all the rules for love and I lost everything. I lost her, and I have no one to blame but myself. Her memory haunts me every single day. Three years after the last time I held her in my arms, I see her in Los Angeles. Is this fate giving us a second chance at love or an opportunity to say goodbye forever?
Addison Walker
I’ve been working hard to slowly put back the pieces of my broken life. I never thought I’d see him again. Sean Connors. He’s the one person who could make me sin. And we sinned . . . Until I lost myself and he wasn’t there. Now he’s standing in front of me like he’s just seen a ghost, and all I can do is stare at the man who made me fall in love with him and burn with passion in his arms.
Will Sean and Addison find redemption, and correct the mistakes of their past? Or will they find out that the cost of being together is too high a price to pay?
Sean
“You want to tell me what’s going on?” Erica gently asks.
“No,” I say, staring unseeingly out the window as our chauffeur takes us home.
“Sean, you can tell me.” I don’t answer her. I think I may still be in a bit of shock. Addison is alive. I’ve spent the past three years mourning her, feeling like a huge part of me has been destroyed. But she’s here in Los Angeles, alive and healthy. How did I not know this? Three years wasted. Fuck! I want to hold her in my arms so badly. Watching her leave with Elle was painful. Erica’s voice cuts through my tortured thoughts. “You could benefit from a woman’s perspective.”
That gets my attention. I finally turn to her. Unsure of what to say, I stay silent. Even though the interior of the car is dimly illuminated by the street lamps, Erica sees the emotions showing on my face. She covers my hand with hers, squeezing gently – a gesture of comfort. Although I don’t react negatively to Erica’s touch anymore and I’m usually okay with her hand on mine, it makes me uncomfortable tonight. She’s the only woman who is allowed to touch me, platonically of course. Three years ago, I froze whenever I felt her hand on me. With time, I learnt to accept it and sometimes when we are outside our home, I hold her hand or put my arm on her waist. Now, I want to pull my hand away but I force myself to stay still. I don’t want Erica to feel rejected and also, I don’t want her to know just how much seeing Addison is affecting me.
“Sean? What’s going on? Is Addison the reason you and Julian aren’t friends?”
Julian Scott. I never let myself think about him. If I do, the guilt would cripple me.
Clearing the lump in my throat, I say truthfully, “Yeah.”
“What happened between you and her?” she asks patiently.
“We were seeing each other,” I confess. There’s no hint of surprise or judgment on her face. I guess I made it obvious that there was an intimate relationship between me and Addie with the way I was acting earlier.
“I thought you were in love with the artist you were seeing back then. What was her name?”
“Savannah,” I say. I cringe inwardly, remembering the last time I saw Savannah. That was the night we broke up. I went to her apartment and told her that I couldn’t give her what she wanted. She cried for so long. She told me what she wanted was me. I felt terrible for a long time. I wanted to love her. I wished so hard for it. I kept away from Addison, and I focused solely on her. I gave the relationship everything I had for over two years except the one thing it needed, and it wasn’t for lack of trying on my part. Savannah was beautiful, kind and smart. If not for Addison, I know that she would have been it for me. She would have been the perfect woman for me. But every other woman paled in comparison to Addie. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get over her.
“No. I was in love with Addie.” There’s no change in her expression. “You don’t look surprised.”
“I’m not. I saw the way you were looking at her tonight,” she says quietly. “If you were
seeing her, then you must have really loved her. I know what Julian means to you.”
“So, no judgment?”
She shrugs delicately, “I’m not exactly in a position to pass judgment. Besides, it’s in the past.”
“I love her, Erica. I’ve loved her for nine years. I’m never going to love anyone else.” Now, she’s surprised.
“Wow. You were together for nine years?”
Shaking my head, I say “No. She didn’t know how I felt until later. No one knew. We spent less than a year together.” It was the best fucking year of my life.
“Why haven’t you spoken to her since she got out of hospital?”
Laughing bitterly at her question, I manage to force out a response, ignoring the tight feeling in my chest. “I didn’t know she was in hospital.”
“What do you mean you didn’t know?” There’s a note of surprise in Erica’s voice.
“I thought she was dead.” Along with a huge part of me.
