Coming Home (Friends & Lovers Book 2)

by PE Kavanagh

“It looks real enough to me.” God, that moment Abigail had stuck out her hand, complete with enormous diamond, to introduce herself, had turned into a brain tattoo.

  “No way. But it doesn’t matter. You need to stay away. The last place you want to be is in the middle of this, whatever it is. Do you hear me, Ramona?”

  She nodded, stunned by the rare appearance of her actual name.

  He continued. “You haven’t been around for a while, but I'm sure you remember how messy things can get. You’re only here for a week. Don’t get yourself caught up in something that’s going to blow up into the rest of your life.”

  Yes. One week. “I’m trying.”

  “I don’t understand how…” Connor’s expression went from concern to recognition. “Wait! You saw him on Saturday night.”

  “You’re the one who told me to go to his restaurant. We ended up… well… you get it. Then last night he came to the house.” It only crossed her mind after all the words had tumbled out that her brother might not want to hear about her sexual exploits. Oh, well.

  Connor’s eyes darted back and forth. “Dad was right. He told me he saw Luc’s car, but I thought he was dreaming. Not cool, Mo.”

  “I'm fucked. Never in my life have I aspired to be the other woman.” A wave of nausea forced her to gasp. “It needs to stop.”

  “Damn straight. Cut it off now.” Connor’s tone lost any hint of compassion. “No more.”

  She nodded while her brother patted her back. It was clear. The first step to taking command of her feelings for Lucas was squashing her own emotional storm. No more anger, guilt, or blame. Then she needed to manage him like she did her skittish clients. Be the grownup in the room. Yes, Connor was right.

  He looked down at his watch. “Sorry to do this, Mo, but I’ve gotta go. Have to be across town for a meeting.”

  “No prob. Thanks for your help today. Love you.”

  He kissed her on the forehead. “Love you. Be good.”

  With each step up the stairs, Ramona reasserted the solidity of her plan. She could rein in the chaos. She could salvage the last few days of her visit. But first, an apology was due.

  Chapter Five

  Ramona stood at Lucas’s front door for long enough after ringing the doorbell that a wide range of doubts crossed her mind. She had gotten the address wrong. He wasn’t home. Or worse, he was home and didn’t want to see her. She reached her hand to try the bell one last time when the door opened.

  “Mowgli!” Surprise sparkled in his eyes.

  “Hey.” She held out one of the large cups in her hand. “I brought you a peace offering.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “Is that…”

  “A green juice.”

  He took it from her and lifted it to examine the brownish-green color. “Come in.”

  She made it as far as the edge of a lovely sitting area. “It’s really good, Luc. Healthy.”

  He twisted his lips to the side. “If this is what you bring in peace, I’d hate to see what you give someone you’re mad at.”

  “Just try it, you big baby.”

  He drew up from the straw and let it linger in his mouth. He nodded. “Okay, not bad. I like the lemon. And the cucumber cuts some of the bitterness.”

  “Good. Now drink up. It’s good for you. Packed with vitamins and anti-oxidants.”

  “You came here to make sure I got my essential nutrients for the day?”

  She took a sip of her own drink. “No. I came here to apologize for being a bitch last night. You didn’t deserve that. I'm just-”

  “You’ve never been a bitch to me, Mo. I was intruding. It wasn’t my place to tell you what to do with the mansion.”

  She looked past him, toward a portrait of his family, hanging above a simple stone fireplace. “We need to stop… It’s not good for either of us.”

  He stepped into her line of sight and narrowed his eyes. “I thought we were talking about the house.”

  “It’s all related, don’t you think?”

  He shook his head. “No, I don’t.”

  She sighed. Why was he making this so hard? “In any case, it’s best if we cool it. Whatever’s going on with you - it feels like something else than what it appears to be - I just don’t want to get involved. That’s why I moved as far away from my family as I could. I’m just not built for this level of drama.”

  He put down the drink, still half full, and took her hand. “Come. Let me show you around the house.”

  The fact that he had brushed aside her concerns did not go unnoticed, but she enjoyed the warmth of his hand and the pull of his arm, and followed him into the living room. Ramona-the-intrepid had become Mo-the-marshmallow.

  “This whole area wasn’t even here. I added it on,” he said indicating a sunken lounge that looked like a modern version of a room in their parents’ houses. He described the floor tiles and built-in cabinets while she looked around, a boyish pride keeping a wide grin across his face.

  He whisked her from one room to another, stopping to give her the details about interesting pieces of wood, or the directions of the windows, or any of a hundred particulars about the house. A full circle led them back toward the kitchen. She’d hardly kept up with his technical explanations, but the excitement in his voice brought a smile to her face.

  He pointed through the large windows providing a nearly panoramic view of the dense woods behind his property. She followed his finger to the far right, to a structure covered in cedar that looked like something from the Far East. Slats of rust-colored wood perfectly aligned under a flat roof, wide doors taking up nearly the entire expanse of one side.

  “What’s that?”

  “A ryokan. Traditional Japanese house. It’s got a sauna and bath.”

  Her gaze followed the winding stone path that connected the main house to the structure. “That’s fantastic, Luc. It’s lovely.”

  He faced her, beaming. “I built it.”

  “You what?”

  “After I finished the house, I needed something else to do. You know how I don’t like to be idle. So I built it. Took almost a whole year.”

  Realization dawned slowly. “What do you mean finished the house?”

  “I built most of this as well. It was a terrible, run-down mess. But I loved the neighborhood and the property, so I decided to remodel it myself.”

  Ramona flashed to his childhood obsession with building blocks. This man couldn’t get any more impressive. “I can’t find a reasonable thing to say. It just feels incredible. Impossible, really.”

  He wrapped his arm around her waist and led her outside. The sharp tang of cedar tickled her nose well before they’d arrived at the ryokan. It was even more beautiful up close.

  She ran her hand along the vertical post carved with Japanese characters. “What does this say?”

  “Where the heart dwells.”

  Instead of lingering on the sensations around her own heart, she stepped into the large room. The same vertical slats lined the interior, tatami mats covering the small patch of floor not taken up by the large square bath. It looked like a Japanese travel brochure.

  “Would you like to bathe with me?”

  His voice startled her out of the examination of a woodblock print she recognized. “What? No. I mean, we can’t.”

  He stepped toward her and cupped her cheek. “We can.”

  Resolve and certainty drained out of her body. She glanced at the paneled bath, imagining how wonderful it would feel to step into the hot water. To watch him come to her. To be with him in this sanctuary.

  She pulled away. “I feel like you’re not listening to me, Lucas. I’m not going to deny that something is happening. I mean, something happened. But I’m not interested in this arrangement. I’ve never aspired to being someone’s mistress.”

  He walked over to the tub and put his hand on the dark green cover. “What if I told you it wasn’t at all what you think? What if you knew that you are the only woman I would invite here?”
r />   “It can’t be…”

  “It is.” He folded the cover in half and then removed it. Steam slithered up from a large open tub.

  In slow motion, she watched him unbutton his shirt. No amount of composure could stand the sight of a half-undressed Lucas Winston. Much less a fully naked one. She stared at his particularly fine ass as he climbed the two steps and entered the tub. Free from the pesky foam and bubbles of jacuzzis and hot tubs, this bath allowed a clear view of everything. Everything.

  As if in a daze, she slipped off her t-shirt and jeans. Then her underwear. His eyes burned into her so intensely that the water almost felt cool on her skin. She sat across from him.

  He did not move toward her. Just kept staring. “Are you comfortable?”

  “Yes, I am.” It was true. The combination of the water and the setting felt like a salve to her frayed nerves.

  “Good. I don’t want you to think that I invited you in here just to get you undressed. I’ll stay on this side if that’s what you want.”

  She dropped down so she was immersed up to her lower lip. How delightful it would be to go under.

  He spread his arms along the edge of the tub, the top of his carved chest peering out of the water. It didn’t matter that she knew better.

  Her body was on his in less than a breath. She pressed against him and groaned into the arms that wrapped around her.

  “It’s so confusing, Lucas,” she pleaded, hoping he would say something to make it all better.

  He tightened his hold on her. “I’m sorry, Mo. I wish I could make it easier. I just can’t explain. Yet.”

  A chill prickled her skin. She was so desperate to rationalize her behavior, to be with him, she would have taken anything. Any explanation. Even the yet that hung on the air felt like a lifeboat. She clenched her jaw to prevent herself from asking. They’d agreed. If only there wasn’t this unrelenting voice telling her that this was exactly where she was supposed to be. And if only it wasn’t loud enough to drown out the resolve that had brought her to his house.

  She leaned against the back of the tub and dropped her head onto his arm. There they sat, unspeaking.

  “Are you ready to get out?”

  He’d read her mind. Instead of experiencing the serenity of the situation, she was growing more and more agitated by desire and confusion. “Yes.”

  He moved toward the edge and stepped out. She’d never tire of that view.

  He opened a door that she thought was just a wall and pulled out a plush towel. He held it out for her to step into and then wrapped it around her.

  She looked up at him as he rubbed her dry. “Thanks for keeping your word.”

  “You didn’t believe that I wouldn’t make a move on you, did you?”

  “I suppose…”

  She pulled him in for a hug, becoming acutely aware that the towel separating their bodies wasn’t nearly enough. The situation just got harder. And so did he.

  He pulled away and glanced down. “Sorry. That was… involuntary.”

  She turned away and stifled a chuckle.

  “Okay, coast is clear.”

  He’d wrapped himself in a towel, but there was still too much sexy flesh to keep things cool. She focused on a stone etched with Kanji.

  “Will you sit with me for a few more minutes? I’m not ready to leave here yet.” Lucas slid open another secret panel and pulled out a cream-colored pad, and unrolled it onto the mat. He adjusted the falling towel and laid down.

  Ramona tentatively stepped toward him, tightening the hold on her own towel, and feeling immediately foolish for doing so. It’s not like he hadn’t already seen everything. And had everything. Ugh.

  She snuggled into his shoulder, resting her arm along his side. Clouds passed slowly overhead, visible through the large glass panel on the ceiling. So much to learn from those clouds. “This spot is amazing.”

  “I come in here after work and have a bath. Then I lay here and look at the stars. Sometimes I even sleep in here. I love everything about it.”

  “I can see why.” She couldn’t understand how he had created this life for himself. “I have to say, Luc, I never would have predicted what a homey guy you’d turn out to be. I mean, building this whole structure, as well as your beautiful house. I imagine you here with a wife, a couple of kids, some dogs. That’s the kind of house you’ve built. It’s not what I would have imagined for a young, hot bachelor.”

  Only after the words came out of her mouth did she remember that he was, in fact, not going to be a bachelor for much longer. It made her stomach lurch and she bolted up.

  He sat up, put his arms around her and led her back down to lay on his chest. He stroked her hair. “Don’t go there, Mo. It’s really not relevant.”

  She swallowed. “But-”

  “I built this place, guided by something unconscious. I wasn’t thinking about creating a family homestead. I just wanted something that would feel good every time I came home. Something that would be beautiful and serene and comfortable. You know, basically the opposite of how either of us grew up.”

  She started to relax, immersing herself in the current conversation instead of the terrible thoughts. “I can understand that. And I applaud you for making it happen. I’m sure it’s a wonderful place to come home to.”

  “Actually, it’s never felt more like that than now, with you here.” He took a long, slow breath. “You’re the first person who’s been in here with me.”

  She bit her tongue, hard, to hold back yet another question. Why hadn’t his fiancée spent time in his house?

  “How about you, Mo? Tell me about where you live.”

  She laughed. “Imagine the complete opposite of this,” she waved her hand around the room, “and you’ll be spot on.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I basically live in the residential wing of a hotel in downtown San Francisco. I spend so much time traveling, I didn’t think it was worthwhile to put down firm roots. And it’s easier with someone taking care of all the maintenance. I don’t have to worry about anything.”

  He wrapped his fingers around her hand and squeezed. “I’m sure it’s beautiful.”

  “Yes. Modern, immaculate, with a great view. Everything’s top-notch, including the service. They’ve been great to me.”

  “But?”

  She wove her fingers in and out of his. “It’s not what I would consider home. It’s more like a place to keep my stuff, and somewhere to sleep when I’m in town.”

  “Hmmm…”

  “Are you judging me?” She poked him in the ribs.

  “Not at all. And I can see how that would make sense for your lifestyle and given your past. We didn’t have great role models for home and family and peaceful spaces. But don’t you want something more?”

  She had to think about it. “My semi-nomadic lifestyle suits me. It works.”

  “Maybe that’s because that’s all you’ve known. Ever since your mother took you and fled to California, you’ve been moving. Then-”

  “At least I came back, even for short visits. My mother has just kept running.”

  “Is she still in the jungle?”

  Ramona shrugged. “I couldn’t even tell you. She calls me once a month, usually from some untraceable satellite phone in a village without running water.”

  “Wow. I can’t imagine.”

  “She’s deliriously happy, though. She gets to be the kind of doctor she always wanted - part medicine, part magic - and can pick up and move to the next thing at any moment. No tethers, no binds, no connections she can’t cut whenever she wants. Compared to her, I’m downright sedentary.” And much more sane, hopefully.

  “Well, you did pick a career that has you trotting around the globe. And a lifestyle with no roots.”

  She stiffened, evaluating the offense.

  “Trust me, I get it. I just wonder if it’s what you really need.”

  And there it was. “It’s pretty presumptuous for you to think you kn
ow what I need. You hardly know me.”

  “Don’t get offended, Mo.” He kissed her forehead. “I feel like I do know you. But maybe all that is outdated. No longer relevant.”

  “Maybe.” It was more likely that he knew her too well.

  They laid in silence until the sun beat down from directly above them. It was nice to have let go of some of her worry, even for a short time.

  She sat up. “This was nice. Thanks.”

  She stood up, and he followed her. They gathered their clothes. “I appreciate you keeping your word. About not… trying anything.”

  He held her face in his hands but didn’t speak.

  She pulled away. “I need to get dressed and get going.” Or else she would be the one crossing her own line.

  They walked to the house in silence. Lucas’ beautiful house in a sprawling neighborhood of beautiful houses. Everything she looked at, touched, exuded care. And he matched it better than she’d ever imagined a person and a house could.

  * * *

  She drove away from his house, glancing at her rearview mirror to see him waving goodbye. Families strolled on the wide sidewalk, everyone smiling as if they were in a commercial. This neighborhood was like an ad for domesticity.

  How had they begun their lives in such similar settings and settled on these versions of home that couldn’t have been more different? Admitting that he’d been right, that she’d grown tired of running, was not a possibility. At least not until all of Virginia was in her rearview mirror.

  Chapter Six

  It was the wrong thing to do, and she knew it.

  The driver turned off the main road and wove through a part of town populated by the mansions Ramona recognized from her youth. Much more ostentatious than Lucas’ lovely neighborhood. She checked the GPS in the center of the dashboard to make sure they were headed to the right place. She didn’t know about this shortcut, which wasn’t unexpected, considering that she hadn’t lived there since she was a teenager.

  She sat back in her seat and tried to calm her pounding heart. Meeting Lucas and his friends for chef’s night at his restaurant was not a smart move. His invitation earlier that day had been sincere, no doubt. They’d left on good terms. He’d proven he could keep his word and that maybe they might be able to rebuild a friendship. If she survived his marrying another woman, that is.