Hold Me (Love The Way Book 2)

by W. Winters

  I feel Ella notice it. Her wet clothes shift against the seat. But she doesn’t ask the question. On some level, she already knows where we’re going.

  The exit that leads to the motel looms out of the night, and I give all my attention to driving carefully. To steering us off the highway and going the speed limit and not fucking up another thing tonight.

  We’re here. The mom-and-pop motel is a strip of rooms on a quiet road off the highway. It was closer than my house, closer than hers. And we’ll have privacy.

  Lights burn on the outside of each door, keeping the night at bay. I think it’s meant to be welcoming, but right now it’s more than welcoming. It looks like safety. There’s no one outside the rooms.

  I park, and leave her where she is.

  “Stay while I get a room,” I order and she nods. For a moment, a tic in my jaw spasms until she answers, “Yes.”

  Once I have the key, I open my trunk to take out a spare bag that stays there. Most of it is useless, but there’s a dry undershirt and pair of boxers that will do. Grabbing them, I go around to her door. Wordlessly, I open it and offer her my hand.

  Ella hesitates.

  Then she puts her hand in mine.

  That hesitation does something to me. I know she’s delicate. But I also know had I been stricter, this shit wouldn’t have happened. She wouldn’t be questioning a damn thing between us.

  I hustle us to the door, take the key out, and let us in.

  The room seems too small to contain me in this moment, but there’s more than myself to focus on. “Get out of those wet clothes.”

  Ella stands by the door, still and silent, and I unbuckle my belt. As I pull it apart, ready to slide it through the belt loops, I see she hasn’t moved an inch.

  “Little bird.”

  Her eyes snap to mine.

  “Get out of those clothes.”

  I don’t know if it’s because she’s responding to me or because it’s cold that Ella’s fingers go to work on the buttons of her coat. She strips it off and tosses it across the table, then goes for the hem of her dress. Anger surges through me again. She could have died, and then I would have been there with her broken body and my broken soul. She could have died and left me to live through the aftermath.

  Ella has her dress over her head, her bare breasts perky, her nipples pebbled. She’s not entirely steady. Probably still drunk, and how the hell did I let that happen? I told her there would be punishment for drinking. She knew that going in. And she did it on purpose.

  Which could mean—

  I don’t know what anything means anymore.

  The rest of her clothes come off, and Ella stands naked by the door of my room. I stalk across the too-small space and grab a clean towel out of the bathroom, then return to her. “Dry yourself off.”

  She follows orders with a sullen set to her chin. Ella’s got a lot of nerve to be pissed at me in this moment. Like it’s my fault that she threw herself into a pool on a cold night. Like it’s my fault she threw herself at her ex-boyfriend.

  Ella hands me the towel with that same tension in her chin.

  Handing out the spare shirt and boxers, I tell her, “Put these on.”

  When she’s pulling the clothes on, I sling her coat over the radiator.

  I turn back to find her looking at me, her eyes huge and questioning and pissed. “What am I here for, Z?”

  “You know why we’re here.”

  “Why don’t you just drop me off at home and leave me?”

  “Leave you?” The incredulity is palpable.

  “You don’t want me. I know you don’t.”

  With a deep, steadying breath, I dare her to call me a liar. “I want you more than I want anything, Eleanor.”

  My words bring her lips to part and a shuddering breath leaves her. I close the space between us, splaying my hand against her back. “The fact that you question that at all tells me I failed you. But my little bird, you are here because it’s time for a punishment that I don’t want anyone to see. I intend to fuck you into the early morning, and it’s only for us. Everyone else needs to get the fuck out of what we are until you know damn well that you’re mine.”

  Her breathing picks up, her chest rising and falling chaotically and her beautiful gaze caught in mine. My heart beats wildly, knowing that look and that need. Knowing this is exactly where we’re supposed to be.

  “Z,” she whispers.

  “You need someone to fuck the wild out of you,” I growl, and it’s wrong. I know it the second I say it. Ella’s eyes fly open, her lips part, and the shock on her face tells me I’ve screwed this up. I’ve stumbled over a hidden pain I didn’t know existed.

  As she pushes me away, my phone goes off.

  I ignore it. “You okay?” I question her as she crosses her arms and moves toward the bathroom, everything changed. Something’s wrong.

  She nods, but doesn’t speak it.

  “Ella,” I start and my phone goes off again. Again I ignore it.

  “Ella, look at me,” I command her and she does as she’s told, her wide eyes staring back at me. “Are you all right?” I question, already knowing she’s not.

  My phone rings in my pocket and I reach for it without thinking. “What?” I snap into the phone.

  “We have a problem,” Damon says. “There are photos of you and Ella at the party and—”

  “I need tonight, Damon,” I cut him off.

  I turn my body away from her, as if that will give me any privacy. As if it will stop her from hearing this conversation. “We need a moment. We can talk—”

  “Photos of you two. At the party. They’re on social media. There’s a story already posted. Several outlets are picking it up. She’s not nobody, Zander. What happened? You need to tell me what happened so I can figure it out.” Damon’s worry amplifies a different concern, one I wish had waited.

  Wood knocks against wood, and I whirl around to find the space by the door empty, the door banging against the frame.

  Fuck! I run out of the room, dropping my phone and race to the end of the hall. I could have gone left or right, I chose left and I chose wrong. With no one there I race to the other side and find that empty too.

  “Ella!” I cry out, desperate for her to come back. Fuck. Fuck. “Ella!”

  Ella

  “I’m going to fuck the wild out of you, El.” James’s whispered words echo in my mind. Tears stream down my face and I can’t stop them. Huddled into a ball in the corner of some utility closet, I don’t really know, it’s so dark, I’m rocking back and forth. All I can do is cry, grieving for a man who loved me truly and deeply.

  My hands tremble, my body’s shaking. With my hair stuck to the side of my face, I let the cold seep in. Needing to feel anything at all. I’ve gone numb. Numb all over.

  I feel it happening again, this darkness that takes over as I gasp in air and wish it would all stop. I’m slipping backward faster than I ever could have imagined.

  In the distance I hear Zander calling my name. Once, twice, then it fades. At least it gave me a moment to breathe.

  I don’t want to be this way.

  It was a moment. Only a moment.

  There’s only one truth that I know as I sit here in the cold dark. I’m not okay.

  You don’t want to miss this epic rollercoaster of an ending, pre-order the conclusion of the Love the Way You series, Love Me today!

  The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a United States-based suicide prevention network of over 160 crisis centers that provides 24/7 service via a toll-free hotline at the number 1-800-273-8255. It is available to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress.

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