Shades of Truth

by Sandra Orchard

  She jabbed his chest. “This is your fault.”

  He glanced at the kid Tony and Darryl were escorting inside. Didn’t recognize him. “What is? What happened?”

  “Cory tried to escape. Apparently ever since you scaled the fence the residents have dared the newbies to try.” She turned to the kids standing around the yard. “Show’s over, back to your game.” To Ethan she said, “What were you thinking, jumping that fence?”

  He shrugged. “You screamed. I did what had to be done.”

  “Did what had to be done, huh?” She barricaded herself behind crossed arms.

  He offered a lopsided grin. “I couldn’t wait to meet you.”

  “Oh, sure.” Scowling, she planted her hands on her hips.

  Not exactly the response he was hoping for. Last night, he’d replayed their kiss a hundred times and envisioned at least as many scenarios of how Kim might feel about it come morning.

  Not one came close to this. “What’s really bugging you?”

  “Joy and I had a talk.”

  Oh, no. Ethan wanted to moan. Joy must’ve told Kim about the accident. No wonder she was steamed. “I’m sorry, I should’ve told you.”

  The look of disgust in Kim’s eyes dug the guilt further into his chest. It was Stephanie all over again.

  “Oh, buddy, you’re gonna be a lot sorrier.” Kim’s gaze darted to the residents scuffing around the court and back to Ethan. “Follow me. Now,” she said between gritted teeth and marched him inside. “We need to talk.”

  Talk? It hurt just to breathe.

  Losing her respect ate at his very soul. “I’m sure Joy’s depiction of the accident was thorough. What more do you expect me to say?” He felt as though he’d been drop-kicked.

  Kim steered him toward her father’s office. “You and I both know Greg’s death was no accident.”

  “Greg?”

  “Of course, Greg.” Kim unlocked the door and motioned him inside.

  Everything about the room felt gloomy. From the black-walnut bookcases and desk to the barred windows behind it. Steel-gray filing cabinets consumed the remaining wall space, like coldhearted tattletales who never forgot a single transgression.

  “Joy saw you go into Greg’s room.” Kim’s voice dropped to a hiss. “I know what you are. You used me.”

  Oh, this was worse than he’d thought. Much worse.

  “I can explain. I heard—”

  Kim’s hand shot out, stopping him midsentence. “Are you or are you not working as an undercover cop? And don’t you dare lie to me.”

  Ethan pressed his fingers to the vein pulsing painfully at his temple. He could concoct an explanation—one that might retain her cooperation and not blow his cover. But looking into her pure green eyes, Ethan couldn’t bring himself to lie. He’d worked dozens of undercover gigs, so why couldn’t he keep a secret from this woman?

  Because when you’re with her, you only want what’s best for her.

  And more than that—she’d made him believe he might actually be good enough for her, even with his ugly secrets. But if he let this masquerade continue, the damage would be irreparable.

  He reached for her hands. Once she saw the situation from his point of view, she’d understand why he had to keep his identity a secret. “Yes. I’m working on a case.”

  For a long painful moment, she just stared at him. Then she yanked her hands from his. “Get out. You’re fired.”

  “Kim, please, let me explain. I wanted to tell you.”

  She jerked open the office door and held out her palm. “I’ll take your ID and keys.”

  Climbing out of his emotions, Ethan reached over her head and shoved the door closed. “You don’t want to do this.”

  She drew herself up to her full five foot six inches. “Oh, believe me. I do.”

  “If you fire me, if you tell people what I am, you’ll only attract more scrutiny. Trust me, a quiet investigation of Hope Manor is far preferable to a public one.”

  “Trust you? Trust you! Like you haven’t been lying to me from the minute we met?” Her eyes flashed. “How could you do this? You know how much I want to save this place, what it means to me.”

  The desperation in her voice shredded the last of his rationalizations. “I’m not here to destroy Hope Manor.”

  “As good as. You must’ve had a hearty laugh over how easily you charmed me into helping you.”

  “No, it’s not like that at all. I care about you. If I didn’t, I would’ve denied everything.”

  Her jaw worked back and forth, as if chewing over his explanation. Her fingers—clenched around the doorknob—turned white.

  Covering her hand with his, he loosened her grip. Before he let her open the door, one way or another he needed her assurance that she wouldn’t expose his mission. “The police chief thinks there’s a dirty cop on the force. That’s why he hired me to figure out who’s recruiting youth from inside the manor. But if we’re right and the drug ring finds out what I am, they’ll kill me as surely as they killed Greg.”

  “And if you succeed—” she drilled him with a pain-streaked glare “—you’ll kill Hope Manor.”

  “That bothers you more, huh? Nice to know where I stand.”

  She jerked away from him. “That’s not what I meant.”

  “Kids are dying, Kim. You have to see how it is. This drug ring must be stopped.”

  She stared out the window, hands clenched. Outside, the chain-link fence, silhouetted by storm clouds, looked downright menacing.

  The minute he’d scaled that fence, he’d locked Kim into his plan as surely as the web of metal wires imprisoned these kids. “I know you want to believe the best of everyone, but someone here is not what they seem.”

  She spun around and dug her knuckles into her hips. “Yeah, I’m looking at him.”

  Ethan steeled himself against the barb. He had a job to do. He never should’ve let his emotions get involved. He positioned himself in front of the door, feet shoulder-width apart, arms crossed over his chest. “I need your promise that you won’t give me up. We want the same things here.”

  “Oh, I don’t think we do.”

  Kim slapped her pen down on the letter she’d been trying to draft and paced to the window of Dad’s office. Holed up here since church let out, she’d managed to avoid running into Ethan, but the respite hadn’t kept him from disrupting her every waking minute, not to mention the fitful scraps of sleep she’d snatched last night. She never should’ve let him talk her into giving him a twenty-four-hour reprieve.

  Take some time to consider the consequences, he’d said. Don’t make a rash decision you might regret, he’d said. I never meant to hurt you, he’d said.

  Right!

  He should’ve considered the consequences before he kissed her.

  Tormenting herself, she revisited the moment. The tenderness of his hands cradling her face. The longing in his eyes. The sweetness of his kiss. With him, she’d felt as though she’d found a part of herself that she hadn’t known was missing.

  What an idiot. All he’d wanted was information.

  She should blow his cover sky-high and see how he liked feeling betrayed.

  Kids are dying.

  Ethan’s words reverberated through her mind once again.

  “Oh, God, what am I supposed to do? I understand that Ethan has a job to do. That the job bound him to keep his true purpose here a secret. But did he have to make me fall for him to do that?”

  She sank into Dad’s chair and hugged her knees to her chest. She’d thought spending the afternoon in Dad’s office would affirm yesterday’s decision to fire Ethan, but peace eluded her. Her chest hadn’t ached this badly since the day Dad confided that he had inoperable cancer.
>
  And what if she did let him stay?

  His investigation could destroy the manor. Didn’t she have a loyalty to her father?

  Why couldn’t Ethan understand that?

  The last thing I want to do is hurt you. What did he think destroying the manor would do to her?

  But Ethan had said an investigation was inevitable, and a quiet one was better than one splashed across the newspapers. He was right, of course. If there was a drug dealer operating out of the manor, he had to be stopped. If only the investigation didn’t jeopardize everything she held dear.

  She jumped as a knock sounded behind her.

  She braced her hand on the back of the desk chair and turned. “Come in.”

  Ethan slipped inside. From the dark smudges under his bloodshot eyes, he looked as though he’d gotten less sleep than her.

  Had his claim that telling her about the investigation put his life at risk been more than a scare tactic?

  He clicked the door closed behind him. “Have you made your decision?”

  “I want you to know that I’ve prayed about this long and hard.” She wavered. “The fact you’re a cop—”

  The door burst open, and Kim froze.

  Darryl stepped inside, his gaze bobbing from her to Ethan.

  Ethan shifted almost imperceptibly, blocking her from Darryl’s view, giving her a moment to collect herself.

  “What’s up?” Darryl said, horning his way around him.

  Ethan’s gaze silently pleaded with her not to betray his confidence.

  Right, like he deserved her cooperation after all his lies.

  She blinked, startled by her abrupt resurgence of anger. She’d panicked at the sight of the door opening, afraid that whoever was there had overheard her call Ethan a cop. But they could trust Darryl. If he hadn’t been out so late last night, she might’ve discussed her decision with him. She stepped around Ethan. “Ethan was telling me—”

  Ethan coughed and lifted a book from the box on the chair. “I was telling Kim that she should give herself some time before making any rash decisions about what she does…with her dad’s things.”

  Kim snatched the book from his hand. Telling Darryl the truth about Ethan was hardly rash. Unlike Ethan, she didn’t keep secrets from those closest to her. Then again, the fewer people who knew why Ethan was here, the less likely his allegations would make headlines.

  Kim fiddled with the corner of the book. Considering Darryl’s dubious expression, she couldn’t predict what his reaction to Ethan’s secret might be. He clearly wasn’t happy to find Ethan here with her. And Darryl hadn’t exactly been on the same page as her when it came to protecting the manor’s future.

  She heaved a sigh. “Ethan’s probably right. It’s been so hard watching Dad’s decline. I might be tempted to chuck something I’ll regret.” Like her good sense.

  Darryl rested his hip on Dad’s desk. “I’m surprised to see you in here on your day off. I thought you rescheduled your date with Aaron for after church.” He snuck a glance at Ethan as if he expected him to be cheesed off.

  “After church tonight. And it’s a meeting, not a date.”

  “Right.” The amusement in Darryl’s eyes said she wasn’t fooling anybody, which had to be more theatrics for Ethan’s benefit, because if her little brother hadn’t clued in yet that she wasn’t interested in Aaron, he hadn’t been paying attention.

  “Was there anything else?”

  Darryl stood. “Nope, I just stopped in to see why you were here.” He gave Ethan a loaded nod. “I guess I’ll see you later.”

  Ethan closed the door. “Thanks for not giving me up.”

  “I did it for the manor’s sake. Not yours. Because, for the record, I intend to prove you wrong.”

  Ethan didn’t so much as blink. “Starting with Aaron?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Then you should know that I followed him to Harbor Park a couple of weeks ago. He met with a group of teens and one of them gave him a paper bag with packets of crack inside.”

  Kim tensed. No, Aaron wouldn’t do drugs. “If the bag was paper, how’d you see what was inside?”

  “I retrieved it from a Dumpster.”

  A laugh of relief burst out. “You’re telling me he threw the bag away?”

  “I know.” Ethan pushed his fingers through his hair. “His behavior makes no sense.”

  Ethan’s frustration was as palpable as the bite of her fingernails in her palms. Clearly, he wasn’t making this stuff up. “It makes no sense,” she said. “Unless…unless you were right about him trying to protect me. If he’s been blackmailed into cooperating with this drug ring, he could be trying to mitigate the damage.”

  She shook her head. Now Ethan had her buying in to his crazy theories.

  “I know you don’t want to believe any of this, but I need you to keep an open mind. The sooner we figure this out, the sooner I’ll be out of your life.”

  The pain in his eyes gave her an unwelcome jolt. Did she want him out of her life?

  She pulled away. Of course she did. For all she knew, the look in his eyes was yet another calculated act designed to win her cooperation.

  How was she going to deal with seeing him all the time?

  She couldn’t do this. She never should’ve agreed to keep his cover.

  But what if he was right?

  She couldn’t bear to be responsible for the overdose of another teen. She’d just have to avoid Ethan. Yeah, avoid him. How hard could that be?

  Apparently not as easy as she thought.

  The next morning Kim sat behind the wheel of her car and stared up at Ethan’s duplex. The sickly sweet smell of gumdrops permeated the air, evoking memories she’d been trying to forget. She wouldn’t be here at all except that last night she’d done some digging of her own—into Aaron’s past—and learned something Ethan needed to know if he didn’t want to waste time investigating the wrong people.

  “Kim?”

  She jumped at the sound of a voice.

  Ethan hunched to the level of her car window. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. What are you doing here?” Perspiration slicked his corded skin and she realized he must’ve been out running.

  “I, uh… We need to talk.” She’d fill him in on what she’d learned about Aaron last night. Then she’d avoid him.

  Ethan glanced at his watch. “Don’t you start work in half an hour?”

  “I called and told them I’d be late. I thought we could grab a coffee and go to the pier.”

  The smile toying with the corners of his mouth did funny things to her stomach. Maybe the pier wasn’t such a good idea, considering what had happened the last time they’d parked by the lake. She cringed to think how easily she’d succumbed to his seduction.

  “Give me a minute to wash up,” he said. “Do you want to wait inside?”

  Her gaze cut to the street and the tiny pinpricks that had been needling the back of her neck stampeded down her spine. But admitting her fear would only fuel Ethan’s theories.

  She tightened her grip on the steering wheel. “I’ll wait here. Thanks.”

  If she were honest with herself, something other than telling him about Aaron had propelled her here. She couldn’t stop thinking about Ethan’s edginess around Joy. She’d written off his reaction as concern that Joy might blow his cover.

  But Joy hadn’t known he was working undercover.

  Sure, she’d assumed he was still a cop, but Kim had corrected her, as Ethan had to have known she would. And on other occasions when his identity might’ve been challenged—with Tony, with Darryl—Ethan hadn’t acted the least bit ruffled.

  He was hiding something more from her, and she needed to know what. She did
n’t want any more surprises.

  TWELVE

  Ethan and Kim carried their coffees to one of the benches along the pier. Squawking seagulls swooped around them in search of handouts. The water sparkled like a thousand diamonds in the early-morning light.

  Ethan sipped his coffee, waiting for Kim to share what was on her mind. For her protection, he’d trailed her and Aaron last night, but he was sure she hadn’t noticed. He’d hoped her conversation with Aaron would yield some insight into his role in the drug-running scheme. But after Kim’s pledge to prove his theories wrong, Ethan hadn’t expected her to rush over and divulge her findings.

  He hadn’t expected her to want to talk to him at all. He’d been a fool to think he could salvage their relationship by telling her the truth about his mission. She could never give her heart to the man destined to tear apart her father’s life’s work, even if she could forgive him.

  After several minutes without a peep from Kim, Ethan said, “Did you and Aaron work out your presentation for the youth group?”

  A sobering thought struck him. While he trusted Kim not to compromise his investigation deliberately, an inadvertent comment might’ve tipped Aaron off. Maybe he was the one who’d called the police station asking about him.

  “We’re going to tell the kids a few of the residents’ stories. Hopefully give them a picture of where they don’t want to end up. And then we’ll open the discussion for questions.”

  “And?”

  Her head tilted, and the glint of sun on her hair revealed hints of red and gold he hadn’t noticed before.

  He resisted the urge to curl a wayward lock around his finger, even as he remembered the silky feel against his skin. He cleared the sudden clog in his throat. “You had something to tell me?”

  “Yes, I asked Aaron if he knew of any teens that were using. He’s suspicious of a few. Said he confronted them. No one admitted to anything, though, let alone snitched on suppliers.”

  “O-kay,” Ethan said, curious why she felt compelled to skip work to tell him.

  “But one girl told Aaron her boyfriend did drugs and was pressuring her to try them. A few days later, she called Aaron in a state because her boyfriend had hid his stash in her purse after he got stopped for speeding. Aaron convinced her to leave her boyfriend and then helped her dispose of the drugs.”