Trusting Grace

by Maggie Brendan

  Mildred squared her shoulders. “That’s exactly why I’m here. I’ve married a wealthy businessman and can now afford to give the children a good home and an education as well. They will enjoy the best of everything.”

  “Is that so?” Robert mused, taking in the fancy traveling clothes, the jewelry hanging about her neck, and rings adorning her hands. Maybe she was telling the truth.

  “Yes. They will have the finest of everything, the way Ada—” Her voice caught.

  “They may not want to come with you. We’re a family now, you know.”

  “But I’m their only blood relative. Could I please see them, if only for a moment? I know it’s hard for you to believe, but I’ve truly missed them.”

  Robert hesitated. “I guess there’s no harm in that. Follow me.”

  As soon as they entered the kitchen, Sarah ran to Grace’s side and hopped up into her lap, while Becky leaned against Owen’s shoulder. It was evident they hadn’t missed Mildred, but Tom was cordial. “Hello, Aunt Mildred. Never thought we’d see you again.”

  Mildred walked over and tweaked Tom’s check. “Dear Tom, I’ve so missed you all.”

  Robert watched as tears flooded her eyes, and he tried hard to understand how she might be feeling. “Mildred, this is Grace’s father, Owen Miller.”

  Owen nodded but didn’t smile. Mildred turned to Robert. “Then Grace is your wife?” she asked innocently.

  Robert cleared his throat. “Uh, no . . . I’m the hired man for Bidwell Farms, which belongs to Grace.”

  “Mmm, I see.” She looked back at the children. “Your stepfather and I are discussing you children returning home with me in a day or so. Won’t that be nice?”

  The term stepfather sounded odd to Robert’s ears. He didn’t feel like one.

  “I want to stay with Miss Grace,” Sarah said, her bottom lip trembling.

  “But you children need a good home and schooling,” Mildred continued. “Becky, I can take you shopping for the latest girls’ fashions. Won’t that be fun?”

  Becky slowly answered, “I guess.” She looked over at Grace with sadness in her eyes.

  “See there, Robert.” Mildred glanced at him. “And Tom, you will have the best education that money can buy. I heard that you want to be a doctor.”

  Tom flashed her a half-smile. “I plan to when I finish high school.”

  “They have a home with me,” Robert said drily.

  “You have to admit—living in a boardinghouse and holding down two jobs doesn’t make much of a home life,” Mildred reminded him. “Don’t look so shocked. That information was quite easy to obtain in town.”

  “I’m wondering how much you had to pay to find that out.” Robert glared at her. It was one thing coming for the children, but it was another thing for her to snoop around in his business. “You could’ve asked me and saved yourself money and time.”

  “I know it’s none of my business, but why don’t you let Robert and the children have some time to think about your offer?” Owen asked.

  Mildred directed her gaze to Owen. “You’re right. It’s not.” She fished inside her reticule and handed Robert a card. “This is where I’m staying. I leave on Monday to return to Cheyenne. Perhaps we can meet for lunch tomorrow to discuss this. But do keep in mind that I’m their only flesh-and-blood relation. Ada would want that.”

  Robert showed her out, then came back and plopped down, suddenly tired. He could feel Grace’s eyes on him. She hadn’t said a word during the conversation.

  “We aren’t going to have to go with her, are we?” Tom asked.

  “Let’s talk about it after we get home, but right now we have chores to do, or poor Miss Grace will be hobbling around trying to do it on her own.” Robert tried to sound cheerful.

  Sarah hopped down from Grace’s lap and went over to him. “Papa, we won’t leave you. Don’t worry,” she soothed in her babyish voice. Robert’s heart melted. He was in a quandary.

  That evening, Grace readily agreed to a ride, sensing that Robert wanted someone to talk to. He’d said very little all day, but went about the chores avoiding any conversation. She was scared that he might agree to let the children go live with their aunt, but she would only give her opinion when asked. In her mind, they hadn’t seemed too keen on going to live with her, and she couldn’t tell what Robert was thinking.

  The gentle breeze that swept across them made their ride in the buggy more enjoyable on a warm summer night. Tall mountain lupine, harebell, and monkshood danced with the wind. They rode in silence for a mile or two until they got to the ridge overlooking the Gallatin Valley.

  “This is the most spectacular view to me, looking down at the town’s glowing lights below us. Ever wonder what folks are doing after the day’s work is done?” Robert asked, staring straight ahead.

  “Many times. I spent a lot of time alone up here after Victor died. It was the only place I could think about life and my circumstances.” Grace moved a stray hair from her eyes.

  “I’m sorry if it brings back sad memories—we can drive farther.” Robert swerved in his seat to face her.

  “No. It doesn’t bother me. I find it quite peaceful. How about you? I know you have a lot on your mind.”

  “You are beginning to know me well.” His slate-colored eyes latched on to hers. “I talked with the children, and they don’t want to go with their aunt. I keep thinking they would have everything that I’ll never be able to give them. Tom wants to go to medical school, and that’s very expensive. I can’t afford piano lessons, or anything else more refined for the girls. Maybe Mildred is right. They’d be better off with relatives.”

  “Do you really think so? I got the impression they were beginning to grow on you. Am I wrong?” Grace was so glad they were alone to talk so she could study his handsome face.

  “No, you’re not wrong. That’s just it. After Sarah almost drowned, then seeing Warren hurt you—I realized how much I care about the children and you. But let’s face it, I’m no great father.”

  Grace took his hand in hers. It was big and strong and calloused. “I thought that’s what you might be thinking. Remember, having everything given to you on a silver platter doesn’t guarantee happiness. And the children really care a lot about you.”

  He smiled and said, “They care more about you than you know, Grace. What should I do?”

  “You need to do what you think is right and fair for them. If you want to be a father to them, then do it. With Mildred they’ll be starting over with another new stepfather. I don’t see how that can be good for them, no matter how wealthy they are. You must figure their happiness in there somewhere. You could try not focusing on the past, but look forward to what the future holds. Trust me, I know how hard that is to do.”

  An owl on the tree branch near them hooted several times, breaking the seriousness of their conversation, and they laughed. A full moon slowly rose over the valley, casting a yellow light around them. “Thanks for your advice. I’ll work on doing that.” Robert leaned in closer, whether to see her better in the moonlight or to kiss her, she didn’t know.

  “Do you want to kiss me, Robert?”

  “Well I was thinking about it. But after last time—”

  “Then go ahead,” she whispered. She closed her eyes and waited. As he drew closer, his cologne pleasantly filled the air between them, and her heart pinged. His lips touched hers, pressing lightly at first, almost timidly, then firmer as if drinking nectar from a flower. He lingered there a long moment.

  He pulled back and she opened her eyes, breathlessly looking into his. His eyes held a softness she didn’t know he possessed. Had Victor ever kissed her that way? She thought not.

  Robert seemed a little uncomfortable. “I hope that kiss was better than the kiss I stole from you a while back,” he said.

  “Much better . . . and one that I encouraged.”

  He reached for the horse’s reins. “I suppose we should be getting back.” He sounded reluctant to leave. �
��I want to keep your father as a friend.”

  Grace giggled. “Remember, I’m a grown woman, not a young lass,” she reminded him as he turned the buggy around.

  “That’s just the problem—we both know what love is about, and we don’t need any temptations.”

  37

  Sleep refused to come as Robert thought about the day’s events with Mildred and the ride with Grace. Hands behind his head and eyes wide open, his mind in turmoil, he ruminated on his answer to Mildred and felt cornered. The truth was the children would be better off with their aunt and all that she had to offer, and yet . . . when had he gone from not wanting them to wanting to be their father? In the beginning he’d been angry and thought his future bleak, believing no woman would want him with three half-grown children.

  But after tonight, he wasn’t so sure. He knew that Grace had grown to love the children, and while he might not call it love yet, what he felt for Tom, Becky, and Sarah was a deep affection. Grace was right, happiness didn’t consist of material things. So keeping all that in mind, how could I send them back? I can’t . . . I just can’t do it. Once he’d reached that decision, he breathed a deep sigh of relief. He hoped his tossing and turning hadn’t disturbed Tom on the other side of the bedroom.

  Chilled, Robert pulled the covers over his shoulders, closing his eyes, allowing the image of Grace’s face waiting for his kiss to fill his thoughts.

  After church the next morning, Grace fixed a quick lunch for herself. Owen and Stella had gone on a picnic, so she took her coffee outside to enjoy a relaxing few hours alone.

  Alone. She wasn’t used to having any time when it was quiet and still, unless she took a ride by herself, but even then she felt the pressure to be back soon to take care of her father. The silence was comforting in some ways, she thought as she sipped her coffee.

  Briefly after church she’d talked with the children and Robert. He seemed in a hurry for his meeting with Mildred, so she never asked him what his answer to the children’s aunt would be. He’d tell her when he was ready. But now she wondered how life would change. If she thought it was quiet now, well . . . It would be hard to let them go, but if that was what Robert considered in the best interests of the children, then what right did she have to say otherwise? She wasn’t his wife . . . yet. But what if Robert liked things as they were between them? One or two kisses didn’t create a meaningful relationship. Good thing they’d become friends now.

  It surprised her that he’d been somewhat shy last night when he wanted to kiss her, but at the same time she knew how he’d been duped into marrying Ada. That was the very reason he’d shied away from having any feelings toward her, she guessed. Maybe he felt like he couldn’t trust her either.

  Whatever the outcome with the children, she’d have to be content, but she’d felt that God had given them as a gift to satisfy her longing to be a mother. Now she wondered if she was only being selfish, since they had living relatives.

  She prayed the answer to the situation would be clear to both parties involved. After all, they would be deciding on three people’s lives that might forever be changed. By tomorrow, she’d know the decision.

  She finished her coffee and leaned back in her chair, enjoying the warm sun, thinking about the feel of his lips against hers. That kiss could last her for a long time . . . forever etched in her memory. But she hoped it wouldn’t have to.

  Monday morning after breakfast found Grace with one eye on the lane leading to her house, and one eye on the tomatoes she was picking. Where was Robert? And the children? Fifteen minutes later, she saw Robert coming up the lane for work, but he was alone. She swallowed hard, blinking back the tears. So he’d given in to Mildred’s demands. As he drew near and stopped in the yard, she searched his earnest face and clenched jaw but wasn’t able to read him. Was he so upset that he couldn’t look at her?

  She set the basket of tomatoes on the ground and walked over to him as he jumped down from the wagon’s seat. “Robert . . . the children . . . are they . . .” She couldn’t finish the thought, her heart ached so badly. Her hands tightened on her apron as she watched his face.

  “I’m sorry, Grace. I let the children decide.”

  “So they—” She choked.

  “SURPRISE!” Three heads popped up from underneath the tarp in the back of the wagon. “We’re staying,” Sarah yelled.

  “Oh my goodness! This is such good news.” Grace fought back the tears, clasping a hand to her chest as the children scrambled out of the wagon to crowd around her. She hugged Sarah and Becky, and while Tom held back, she reached for him and he allowed a hug from her.

  “I take it you like the news?” Robert said, grinning as he watched them.

  “You’re all so sneaky.” Grace laughed. “I was certain when I thought you were alone they’d left with Mildred.” She wagged her finger at Robert.

  “We didn’t want to go live with Aunt Mildred. She was never mean to us, but we like living right here in Gallatin Valley,” Tom said.

  Grace nodded. “And I couldn’t be happier for you if that’s how you feel.”

  “We did agree they could visit her for a week or two every year, if they wanted to,” Robert confirmed.

  Grace smiled at all of them. “That’s sounds fair enough. This calls for a celebration.”

  Sarah clapped her hands. “What?”

  “Why don’t you girls and I bake some apple pies, and if you can’t stay for lunch when Robert leaves for Eli’s, then I’ll let you take one home. How does that sound?”

  “My mouth is already watering.” Tom rubbed his hands together in anticipation.

  “Then you men get started, and we’ll bake the pies.” Grace’s heart was singing inside, and when she glanced over at Robert, he winked.

  “Let’s get going, Tom. We’ve got plenty to do this morning.”

  Owen watched the interaction from his usual view at the parlor window and smiled. Thank God, this was a good turn of events. He didn’t know what he would’ve done with Grace if the children had decided to go with their aunt. One thing he knew for sure, God did answer prayers—maybe not the way everyone expected, but He did on this one. Owen loved seeing his daughter happy, and when she was quiet yesterday he knew she’d been worried.

  Owen saw Tom at the doorway. “I just wanted to tell you that we are not going to live with my aunt.” He was beaming.

  “I thought that was the case as I sat here watching, and I’m glad, Tom. I’ve gotten used to having you and the girls, and it’d be mighty lonely around here without all of you now.”

  “Thank you, sir.” Tom cleared his throat and although it looked like he might cry, Owen knew better. “You’re like the grandfather I never had.”

  He turned, scooting out before Owen could reply. Owen chuckled, then said aloud, “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.” And he needed all the medicine he could get.

  Becky rolled out the dough for the piecrust while Grace and Sarah sliced apples, then mixed in sugar and cinnamon together for the filling. They chatted and laughed as they worked, enjoying their time in the kitchen together. Anyone walking in would’ve thought this was a natural family occurrence. Grace starting humming a tune and the girls joined in while Becky folded the crust in half then laid it in the pie pan the way Grace demonstrated. Grace showed them how to use their fingers to crimp the edges of the crust, while they giggled throughout the entire process.

  “The oven is hot, so let’s get these pies in,” Grace instructed. “Becky, you keep an eye on the pies while Sarah and I make lunch, so the men can eat early before leaving for the mercantile.”

  “Men? Are you calling my brother a man?” Sarah laughed.

  “He is nearly grown and he’s doing a man’s job. So we should respect that,” Grace answered.

  Becky’s eyes narrowed. “I never thought of him that way, but I reckon you’re right.”

  Sarah looked thoughtful. “He’s been our protector since Mama died too. That’s because he loves us,
huh, Miss Grace?”

  “Yes, I’m certain of it. And now you have Robert to protect you as well.”

  “I’m so glad we didn’t have to go live with our aunt,” Becky added.

  Grace beamed at both the young girls. “Me too. I would have sorely missed you.”

  “Then maybe you could be our mama, ’cause we love you,” Becky leaned near and whispered.

  “Now wouldn’t that be something? I love all of you too. I couldn’t ever replace your mother, but I can be your best friend for now, and be here whenever you need me.” Grace hugged them to her while the smell of baking apples filled the kitchen, much as their love had filled her heart.

  “I think that’s about the best pie I’ve ever tasted,” Robert commented as Grace followed him out the door to where the children waited in the wagon. “Thank you for lunch.”

  “I assure you it was my pleasure. We had so much fun baking them, and I hope I taught the girls a thing or two.”

  “We need to get going, but while I’m in town do you want me to ask around for extra hands to help with the harvest?”

  “That would be an excellent idea,” she said. “I don’t think we can do it all.”

  “If I have anything to do with it, we’ll get enough help so you won’t have to and leave the hard work to us. But maybe you can feed us and the girls could help.”

  “We could manage that.”

  “Grace—” he stammered.

  “Yes, Robert?”

  “I . . . uh . . . wanted to say thank you for everything these past few months. You’ve helped to make our lives bearable.”

  “I’m happy I could help.” Grace squinted up at him in the noonday sun.

  He seemed to want to say more but instead doffed his hat, then climbed up onto the seat of the wagon and took off while the children waved goodbye to her.

  After dropping the girls off at the boardinghouse, Robert and Tom went on to the store, ready for their afternoon work. From the looks of it when Robert entered the store, Eli was having a busy Monday.