by Marisa Logan
“You’re right,” Helena said. She held out her fist to Rebecca and Rebecca laughed and fist pumped her.
“You really should be a therapist though, Rebecca. And maybe you should write Hallmark romantic comedies,” Helena winked.
“A compliment and an insult in one go. That science teacher is in for a treat. Now, stop being a nervous wreck, and go talk to him,” Rebecca said.
“I will,” Helena sighed. She nodded her head to talk herself into it. It was as good a pep talk as any.
“I will…”
Chapter 7
“Thank you for agreeing to meet with me.”
Helena was standing in front of the dinosaur remains when she saw Stanley walk into the library.
“No problem,” he said. His smile was warm and he pushed his glasses further up to settle them on the bridge of his nose.
“I wanted to talk to you. About the way I’ve been acting. I won’t be completely open, because that’s hard for me. It’s a lot easier for me to joke around and be silly. That’s why I’m really good at beginnings, and then the middle falls apart somewhere, and I’m just no good at endings,” Helena said. She barely took a moment to breathe.
“I know what you mean. I worry too much even before the beginnings,” Stanley said.
“Yeah, me too.”
Helena moved around the Apatosaurus bones and Stanley followed behind silently.
“I had this really amazing speech. I sometimes like to make conversations in my head so I’ll know the right thing to say and the perfect way to answer. But now I just have a bunch of words bouncing around in my head,” Helena said. She groaned.
“That’s fine. Take your time,” Stanley said.
“That! Stop that.”
“Stop what?” Stanley was confused.
“You’ve just been so nice and so patient. You were apologizing when you weren’t the one who did anything wrong. I’m so afraid of someone walking away that I walk away first. But I don’t want to walk away this time,” Helena blurted out.
“You’re talking awfully fast.”
“I know. I’m nervous, okay? I’ve never done this before,” Helena said. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath through her mouth. She held the breath in for a moment, and in that time Stanley smiled sweetly at her. She let out the air in a loud whoosh, and someone from the library shushed her.
“Ok. Long story short, my mother and I were kind of a second family. My dad is some wealthy white important businessman, but he fell in love with my mother, who is Haitian. Fell in lust rather. Are you with me so far?”
Stanley responded with a single nod. He could see that nerves were making her shake a bit, and he took both of her hands in his and squeezed them. She could feel his warmth flowing through her.
“Ok, so my father and mother had me, but their affair didn’t last because he had a family of his own and so he was never around. He’d pay for my school and my art classes though. His wife knew. She didn’t want to act like she knew. I met her once. She was such a bitch though. My father didn’t defend me at all. So, I guess I’ve just always been afraid. I’m afraid to become my father’s wife; a man who marries me but can start a family with someone else. I’m afraid to become my own mother; having a man who walks in and out of my life anytime he sees fit. I’m afraid to be abandoned, mentally and physically.”
By the time she had finished speaking Helena had a few tears streaming down her face. She released herself from Stanley’s grip and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. She was wearing a jacket, and the tears seeped into the fabric. It normally took her so long to open up to somebody about her life like that, especially involving her fears, but she was feeling so vulnerable at that moment. Everything she had held inside was now pouring out, and she didn’t know how to stop it.
“Would you like a hug?” were the first words Stanley said when Helena stopped crying. She didn’t let herself be sad for too long. She nodded and almost collapsed into his arms. She pressed her face against his heart and listened to it beat. The sound soothed her, and she didn’t care that they were in public or if anyone was watching them.
“I just wanted to explain myself and say that I’m sorry,” Helena blubbered. “It’s not that I don’t like you. It’s that I’m scared to.”
“I understand more than you know. I’m scared to make a mistake or hurt anyone. I’m scared to be myself because I’m never sure if anyone will like all that I am. Keeping quiet mostly means that I know everyone vaguely, and so all my friendships and relationships have been vague. Stuff I learned from my family too. There was no love in my parents’ marriage. That’s why I’d come here a lot when I was a kid. Books…science were my escape. I’m not afraid of someone walking away, I’m afraid if someone forces themselves to stay in something they know they don’t want,” Stanley said. He rocked Helena gently when he spoke.
“Oh god,” she said looking up at him. “So we both have kind of sad childhoods.”
“Yeah. But that doesn’t mean that our adulthood has to keep us sad and afraid. We don’t have the past anymore. We have now. And I don’t know about you, but I’ve liked every now we’ve had…even the nows on the phone.”
Helena laughed a little at that and pulled away to look Stanley in the eyes.
“I can’t promise anything in the future. I can just promise right now,” Stanley continued. “I know that I like you now. And I’m guessing that you like me as well. We can go as slowly as you’d like and just see where all of our nows take us. If things don’t work out, there may be love and lessons there…and if things work out…isn’t that worth finding out?”
“You really should meet my coworker. You both should start up a greeting card business, or write sappy romances for Kindle, or maybe even…”
Helena didn’t get a chance to finish her sentence. Stanley had taken a chance, and leaned forward to give her a kiss.
“I just wanted to get your attention,” he said when their lips parted.
“You have my full attention Mr. March. At least for right now,” Helena cooed.
“And now is what we have right?” Stanley laughed.
Helena leaned forward to kiss Stanley again.
“Right now is all we have.”
Epilogue
“Hi, do you guys need any help?”
“I’m trying to find a flower for this lovely lady. One that matches the streaks in her hair.”
Stanley smiled and kissed Helena’s hand. They were inside the flower shop that he had gotten the Stargazer from just months before.
“I dig your hair,” the young woman said when she saw Helena. The florist had beautiful dark skin and dimples in both of her cheeks. Her hair was a long and wild afro and she was dressed way too stylishly for this time of year. Helena wondered if she was freezing.
“Thanks. I love yours too,” Helena said. The young woman smiled and showed the deep dimples in her cheeks. She moved around the store in search of flowers that matched Helena’s hair.
The streaks in it were no longer pink, but now a vibrant shade of purple. There were big bright purple flowers that Helena could see and she moved towards them, tugging on Stanley’s arm so that he could follow her.
“Excuse me. But the other woman with the nose ring. Is she here?” Stanley asked.
“Jess? No, she’s out sick today. I hope you don’t mind me helping out. I’m pretty damn good at picking flowers too,” the woman said with a laugh.
“I like her already,” Helena whispered to Stanley, and he smiled at her and nodded.
“What’s the occasion?”
“Oh, we’ve been together for 2 months now, and I wanted to show her where she knew she’d fall in love with me.”
Helena jabbed Stanley in the ribs. She had admitted to him that she knew that he was going to be someone special in her life when he had given her the Stargazer. So far she was right.
The florist looked around the store and showed Helena a few large purple flowers.
“I really like these, but ooooh, what are those?” Helena noticed a small flower pot with tiny purple flowers.
“Those? Oh those are verbenas.”
“I was confused before but now I know for sure. These. These are my favorite.”
THE END
Bonus books follow excerpt.
Excerpt -- Any Blooming Thing
A Sweet Contemporary Romance Novella
Flower Shop Romance Book One
MARISA LOGAN
Book Description
Jessica and Chleo own a flower shop in the city. They met in high school and now, almost 15 years later, the best friends have created their perfect jobs working together at Any Blooming Thing.
One day Jessica and Chleo notice a tall blonde man outside walk past the store window. Although they only see him from behind, something about him seems very familiar. Is it possible that they know him from the past?
This is a clean romantic short story suitable for young adults and older.
Chapter 1
“How much for a dozen red carnations?” the man was short, and he had a habit of rubbing the bridge of his nose, whether his glasses were falling off or not. He’d been to this flower shop twice in this last week and hadn’t bought anything. He was probably trying to impress a date. Maybe weighing the pros and cons of getting the person flowers or a box of chocolate.
Chleo saw him walk into the store, shook her head, and disappeared into the back. So it was up to Jessica to help this awkward and creepy gentleman.
This city was full of characters. ‘The nice ones are always nuts,’ Chleo had said, ‘and the ones who look like basket cases are always telling you to love yourself’.
“Carnations?” Jessica frowned. He might as well have told his date that he was a sleaze ball. Jessica’s frown made the short man frown too.
“I don’t know anything about flowers,” he admitted with an awkward smile. He touched the bridge of his nose, checking to see if his glasses were still intact, and looked around the shop.
“What do you have that would be nice for a date?”
Of course it was for a date. Jessica wanted to know why it took three trips to Any Blooming Thing for him to finally decide on flowers.
“Roses are nice. Not a dozen though. A dozen is more for apologies when you’ve been caught cheating, and really special occasions,” Jessica laughed.
The man laughed nervously.
“I’m gonna go ahead and guess that this is the first date?”
The man nodded.
Jessica had owned this business long enough to figure out whatever reason people needed flowers for. He seemed sweet albeit lost. She didn’t have the heart to tell him that a bouquet of flowers on the first date was a bit played out since the 90s. That and she was running a business after all.
“If you ask me, get her one flower. Not a bouquet,” Jessica said.
“Uh huh, uh huh, I see,” the man said darting his eyes around the store. He looked like he was going to be dizzy in a minute. He was overwhelmed. He must really like the woman he’s trying to impress.
“What do you know about her? I mean, what are some things she enjoys and how did you guys meet?”
“Oh, I met her at a school fair. Our schools were competing in different subjects. There were, I think, 9 schools there. She’s an art teacher, and I’m a science teacher a few districts away. We both teach middle schoolers. She’s so wild and beautiful. She has pink streaks in her hair, and women like that always fascinated me. Like you and your tattoo. You’re all so bold, and I guess I wanted to get to know her because of that. It kind of shocked me that she took an interest in me too.”
The man was practically tripping over his words. It was adorable how nervous he was just thinking about what to get the art teacher on their first date.
“I know just the one,” Jessica said with a smile. Her bright smile revealed the tiny brown freckles that she had spackled across her nose.
“You do?”
“Yeah,” Jessica walked down an aisle of the little shop. She knew where every flower was. She had arranged them herself. She climbed two levels up a step ladder and brought down a bright pink flower with freckles that looked like hers.
“A stargazer,” Jessica said. “You teach science, she teaches art and has pink in her hair. This flower represents both of you.”
The man with the glasses grinned a genuine grin and took the flower from her.
“This…this is perfect.”
He thanked her so many times as he paid, and he promised to come back any time he needed flowers for anyone. Jessica wished that everyone were this grateful for her work. She told him to come back any time.
“Is he gone?” Jessica could hear Chleo whisper from the back room. The door was open just a crack, and Jessica could see Chleo’s big brown eyes. That made her laugh.
“He’s gone. He was actually really sweet. Just totally nervous about a first date,” Jessica said.
Chleo emerged from the back room and eyed Jessica.
“Yeah, I heard. If he comes back again this week, I’ll know for sure that he’s crazy.”
Chleo adjusted the white headband that she wore. Her hair was thick and curly, and if she didn’t tie it back, it would be flowing freely about her face and shoulders. Sometimes she did keep it out, but to her, it was a hassle having to keep brushing it back so that it didn’t get in the way.
“You think everyone’s crazy huh?” Jessica asked. She was almost Chleo’s exact opposite physically. It hadn’t always been that way. When the two met in high school, they were both medium height, and a bit thick with long curly hair. They were known as the yin yang sisters because Jessica was pale, and Chleo was dark, and they rarely were seen without the other one by their side.
Now, after almost 15 years, Jessica looked completely different. She was a very late bloomer. She grew several inches taller than Chleo and lost a bit of weight. She straightened and dyed her frizzy ginger hair a kind of soft black, which made her icy blue eyes stand out.
Chleo stayed pleasantly plump and had a beautiful personality to match her beautiful face. She was always making everyone laugh and she had dimples in both of her cheeks. They were still as close as sisters after all this time, and they opened Any Blooming Thing together when they were 26. Chleo had moved to the city to be closer to Jessica, and everything turned out perfectly.
“Hell yeah I think everyone’s crazy. Do you know the city we live in?”
“I feel like if you had a gun you’d be the shoot first and ask questions never type.”
“See that’s not fair. You’re only saying that because you know me.”
Jessica doubled over with laughter. Chleo was a trip.
“I bet you I can find one decent man in this city,” Jessica said when she finally stopped laughing.
“Ok, and when you find him, ask him if he has a brother or a friend,” Chleo giggled.
“Yeah, but I don’t even know where to look.”
Chleo looked outside the window of the store. The majority of the front wall was a window, and a red dutch door that had a large foggy glass pane on the top half of it.
Just then, a tall blonde man walked by. His face was toward the street, but there was something vaguely familiar about him. Jessica leaned forward, like that would get him to turn his face around. She was sure that she knew him from somewhere. Just seeing the back of his head made her entire body tingle with curiosity.
“Hmm,” Chloe said thoughtfully. “What about…him?”
END OF EXCERPT
Bonus Book 1 -- My Chance
A Contemporary Romance Novella
(Clean Version)
JANUARY STARR
Copyright © 2016 by January Starr
All rights reserved, worldwide.
No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned or distributed in any printed or electronic form.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product
of the author's imagination or used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.
Book Description
When Donna's grandmother dies, it brings her family together for the first time in five years. She and her siblings discover that Grandma left them all a sizable inheritance. But there's a catch: in order to collect the money, they need to first obtain in a college degree or forfeit their share.
Donna is stuck in a desperate situation. She dropped out of college years ago in order to raise her daughter. She's drowning in debt and desperately needs this inheritance to make a future for herself and her daughter.
The only way to get the inheritance is to head back to school and try to juggle college life, working a day job, and raising a daughter all at the same time. There's little room for her new friend Connor and no room for error.
Content label: This is a 20,000 word clean romance. A sexual relationship is implied, however there is nothing more explicit than kissing in the story.
Chapter 1
I hadn't spoken to my younger brother and sister for about five years before the day of our grandmother's funeral.
We each sat in different rows during the small church service. Dad sat somewhere partway between all of us. He'd been stuck between us for years, juggling everything to keep us separated during the holidays.
I'd said on more than one occasion that I wouldn't mind us seeing each other for family gatherings. There was no reason we couldn't be civilized towards each other. But the last time we made the attempt, my little brother had gone into a full-blown panic attack in Dad's driveway on Christmas Eve. I wasn't quite clear on what had been going through his head—I never had been, since we were little—but apparently he had been so scared of what we would do and say that he had a complete breakdown. I remember standing in Dad's living room, watching as he carried Jimmy's Christmas presents out to the car, before Jimmy and his girlfriend had driven away.
