Seasons of Her Life

by Fern Michaels

  Martha and Andrew weren’t her only problems these days. In the three years Amber and her family had lived in her house on O Street, Ruby had heard from her twice. Both letters were full of complaints. Now, according to a letter she received from Rena, there was a problem. Ruby was behind in her mortgage, and the bank was threatening to foreclose because Amber hadn’t paid the last six months’ rent. The house was a shambles, according to Rena, with holes in the walls and stains on the carpets that would never come out. Dog and cat stains. She’d underlined that sentence. The same animals had chewed the molding and door frames. There were six broken windows, and the cellar door was off its hinges. They never mowed the grass, and the flowers and shrubs were all gone. Two of the boards on the back porch were missing, and the house smelled like cat piss: She’d underlined that sentence, too.

  Ruby burst into tears that came out in hard, racking sobs. Her shoulders shook and her stomach heaved. She jerked upright when she felt a gentle hand on her shoulder.

  “What’s wrong, Mom?” Andy asked in a shaky voice. He’d never seen his mother cry, and he was scared. “Did I do something wrong? If I did, tell me and I’ll fix it.”

  “I’m just having a bad day, honey. Sometimes mothers get weepy and things bother them. It has nothing to do with you, Andy, or Martha, either.”

  Not satisfied, Andy demanded, “Is it Dad? You know, Mom, he has demons in him. Not real ones, but . . . when people act the way Dad does, that means he can’t handle things. I learned that in Bible class. You can’t let Dad get under your skin. You have to learn that his bark is worse than his bite.”

  Ruby stared up at her seven-year-old son. He was a handsome, sturdy little boy with blond curls and incredible blue eyes. A smattering of freckles danced across the bridge of his nose. These days all he worried about was how long it would take for his two front teeth to come in. “How did you get so smart?” she asked playfully. “How is it you are so in tune with me?”

  The little boy pondered the question and then shrugged. “You’re my mom. I’m always going to be a good boy so you’ll be proud of me.”

  “Oh, Andy, I am proud of you. I think I love you more than life. Martha, too.”

  The phone rang and Andy raced to answer it. The call was for him. He started to jabber excitedly about tin cans tied to strings that could be stretched between houses. Ruby smiled.

  Ruby squared her shoulders. Andy was okay, and she would keep him that way. Martha would heal. Martha would be fine. Whatever she had to do to ensure that end, she would do. Now, though, she had to deal with the problem of Amber.

  She left at seven o’clock, the moment Andrew walked through the door. She babbled some lie about a family emergency and did her best to avoid looking him in the eye. Not that he was able to focus. There was alcohol on his breath.

  Andrew followed his wife out to the carport, squawking at her the whole way: she was crazy like her old man, and who did she think she was, taking off in the middle of a rainstorm?

  Ruby closed and locked the trunk. She felt revolted when she stared up at her drunken husband. Thank God she’d sent Andy to sleep over at a friend’s house. Martha was at a friend’s, too, something Ruby always arranged carefully so the child wasn’t home on weekends when there was a chance Andrew would be home.

  “Who am I, Andrew? Your wife, but then, you seem to have forgotten that these past years. I’m the person who cleans up after you when you vomit your guts out and you miss the bowl. I’m the person who bore you the two wonderful children you’re bent on destroying. I’m the person who cooks and cleans and goes to your shitty meetings so you can get ahead. I’m the reason you’re where you are. I didn’t know that for a long time, but I know it now. Do you want to know how I know, Andrew? Martha’s doctor told me. You’re the one with the problem. We’re normal, you aren’t. I tried, Andrew, my God, how I tried. I gave one hundred and ten percent. I don’t care anymore. When I get back, you and I are going to have a long talk, and if we can’t bring this marriage together, for us and for the children, I’m leaving. I want you to think about that this weekend. Think about it all weekend and not with your snoot in a bottle. I mean it, Andrew, I’ll leave.”

  “Over my dead body,” Andrew blustered.

  “If that’s what it takes,” Ruby snapped. God, why was she even talking to him? He wouldn’t remember any of it once he slept off his drunk.

  “You aren’t leaving. I’m up for promotion. I’ll grind you to a pulp before I let you leave,” he slurred.

  Ruby climbed into the car and rolled down the window. “Don’t threaten me, Andrew. And always remember what happened to Hugo. That’s something else I found out about. The same thing can happen to you, and I’m the one who can do it.” Ruby stuck her head out the window. She enunciated each word carefully. “I will do whatever it takes to make our daughter healthy. I will make her well, with or without you. Now, get the hell out of my way before I run you over.”

  The car roared backward with such force that Ruby was certain she had given herself whiplash.

  As she drove across the state on Route 10, she muttered under her breath. She was still muttering hours later when she swung the Pontiac north on Route 95. She wasn’t tired. In fact, she felt exhilarated. She drove with the windows wide open and the radio at full blast.

  It was six o’clock the following day when Ruby carefully maneuvered the Pontiac down the narrow alley behind Rena’s house on Monroe Street. She had driven all day and night without stopping. She smiled tiredly when she saw the garbage cans. The old metal ones had been replaced with large heavy plastic but were still flowered and beribboned. She blinked at the long white Cadillac. Rena was doing well.

  Five minutes later she was wrapped in Rena’s small arms with Bruno waiting impatiently for his turn. “Oh, it’s so good to see you. I’ve missed you both. Ah, more diamonds.” Ruby giggled when she noted a rather small stone, by Rena’s standards, studded into her pinky nail.

  “Never mind. Come inside. You look tired. When did you leave?” Rena demanded as she pranced about the kitchen, opening and closing drawers while Bruno fussed with uncorking a wine bottle.

  “About seven-thirty last night. I am tired, but I had to come,” she said, a note of apology in her voice.

  “Of course you did. That sister of yours . . . she is so ungrateful. She is also rude, and her children are like little savages.”

  The tiny woman threw her hands in the air to indicate there was no describing them. “Eat, eat. Leave nothing. Tomorrow we will go to your house and you will evict that ungrateful wretch. Make her pay for the damages. Bruno will fix everything, for a small fee. The cat piss . . . I don’t know if you can ever get that out . . . it’s a disgrace.”

  “I wish you had written sooner,” Ruby muttered as she bit down into a delicious chicken sandwich.

  Rena forced a second sandwich on her while she consumed two glasses of wine. A slice of banana cream pie that was still warm completed Ruby’s meal.

  “Who lives upstairs?” Ruby asked, lighting a cigarette.

  “A nasty couple from Alabama. Can you believe this, Ruby? They had the gall to change the locks on the door so I couldn’t go in to check on my property. They took me to court, and the judge said they had to give me a key. I want to evict them. They talk like they have marbles in their mouths. Just last week they said they were changing the wallpaper. Out they go the minute their lease is up!”

  Ruby sighed wearily. She was so tired, she had barely heard a word Rena had said.

  “You are asleep on your feet, little one. Come, I have your bed all ready. Bruno has just given me the signal that he has turned down the covers.”

  Ruby stumbled down the hall, twice lurching against Bruno’s broad shoulder. She sat down on the bed fully clothed. Bruno removed her shoes and covered her with a blanket. “Sleep, Ruby,” he said gently. “Tomorrow my wife will help make things right for you.”

  Nothing Rena said prepared Ruby for her first look at the house
on O Street. She drew in her breath in a sharp hiss. The doorbell was hanging by a wire, and the door itself was scuffed and dirty. Even the brass kickplate was streaked and tarnished. Tactfully, Rena said nothing.

  Ruby knocked. She was forced to stand back in order not to be trampled when a horde of children exited, screaming and yelling. Then a dog streaked through, skidded to a stop, sniffed at Ruby’s and Rena’s shoes, and bolted down the steps.

  Rena pushed Ruby inside. A thirteen-inch television blared from the living room, while strains of music echoed from the kitchen area. Rena was right, Ruby thought as she started to breathe through her mouth. The cat urine was so strong, it made her eyes water. She walked gingerly through the toys and clothes that littered the floor.

  Ruby looked around in amazement at the holes in the walls, at the dirty drapes and curtains and the stains on the beige carpet. The parquet floors were scarred; all signs of the finish were gone. The furniture sagged and was filthy; the slipcovers were full of holes and stains. The watercolors on the wall hung askew, giving the living room a drunken appearance. Ruby shuddered.

  From somewhere upstairs a baby wailed. Ruby’s eyes widened. Amber hadn’t said anything about a new baby.

  “And she’s pregnant again,” Rena said under her breath.

  Ruby felt her eyes roll back in her head. By sheer will alone she forced herself to calmness. She would deal with this as she dealt with everything.

  “Is Nangi working?” she whispered. Where was Amber? Certainly she wasn’t cleaning, she thought nastily. The dog was back, along with a cat, circling like vultures. Ruby was suddenly afraid to move.

  “Yes. Bruno himself checked out the downtown firm he works for. Your sister told me they’re saving all their money to return to Saipan.”

  “Not at my expense,” Ruby grated.

  “Amberrrrr!” she shrilled at the top of her lungs.

  This couldn’t be Amber, not this slovenly, unkempt, pregnant woman with a dishtowel in her hands. This creature couldn’t be the persnickety, meticulous girl whose wardrobe matched, right down to her underwear and the bobby pins in her hair. Upstairs, the baby continued to wail. Amber seemed oblivious as she stared at Ruby. There was no hello.

  “What are you doing here?”

  “I own this house, or did you forget? The door was open, we walked in. I did knock.”

  “You could have closed it,” Amber snapped, kicking at the door with her foot. Ruby winced.

  Out of the corner of her eye she noticed movement on the stairway. She turned to see Nangi impeccably dressed in a navy blue suit and white shirt. He was carrying a lizard-skin briefcase.

  “Ruby?”

  “Yes. And I guess you know Rena. I have to talk to both of you. I’m sorry if it will make you late for work.”

  “I can make up the time. Is something wrong? Amber, offer our guests some coffee. Please, come and sit down,” Nangi said, indicating the sagging couch. Surely, he wouldn’t risk sitting there, Ruby thought crazily. He’ll get dog and cat hairs all over his suit. She shook her head.

  “This won’t take long. I’m sorry about all this, but the bank that holds my mortgage notified me that you and Amber haven’t been paying the rent this past year. They’re ready to foreclose. I’ve charged you only two hundred dollars a month, and that’s more than fair. I thought you would still be able to save a little. I didn’t know about the baby”—she waved her hand toward the ceiling—“or that Amber is pregnant again. I don’t want to lose this house, so we’re going to have to do something.”

  “What? You want us to move, is that it?” Amber whined.

  “That’s one solution. The other is that you come up with six months’ back rent, and you start taking care of this place. I sold my other house so that Mom and Pop could move to Florida, and I gave you this one in excellent condition to help you out. Now look at it. The dog and cat have to go!”

  Nangi’s briefcase snapped open. “You have my apologies, Ruby. I thought Amber had been paying you all along. You’ve been more than generous. I don’t know what we would have done without your help. It seems no one wants to rent to people with children. I told Amber a while back that we should be paying you at least three hundred dollars a month. Your previous tenants told me when they moved out that they had been paying five hundred. That makes me appreciate all the more what you’ve done for us.”

  Ruby felt giddy; her heart thumped in her chest. She watched as Nangi wrote out a check and handed it to her. “You have my sincere apologies. From now on the rent will be on time, and it will be three hundred dollars. Is that satisfactory?” Ruby nodded dumbly as she looked at the amount on the check—eighteen hundred dollars. Dear God, she was off the hook; her only other alternative would have been to sell the czarina’s ring.

  Nangi bowed low. “It was nice to see you again, Ruby. I’m sorry it was under these circumstances. I’ll be seeing Calvin in a few weeks. Would you like me to say hello for you?”

  “Yes, say hello for me.” She had to ask, she had to know. “Where is he these days? How is his family?”

  “He has two handsome sons. He is now what you Americans call a full bird colonel. He says he’s had “below the zone” promotions, which I think means he’s advanced very quickly. He’s stationed in Colorado. He always asks about you, but I never have anything to tell him. Amber says she never has any news of you.”

  A tiny, tinkling arm snaked out to steady Ruby. “Tell him ... tell him I think of him often. You can tell him I, too, have two children, and we’re stationed in Pensacola. Tell him ... I look forward to seeing him someday. Wish him well and congratulate him on his rank. My husband is up for his silver oak leaves.”

  “I’ll be sure to tell him, Ruby. Do you by any chance have a picture of yourself and the children?”

  Thank God he’d asked. “I think so,” Ruby murmured as she searched through her wallet. A small stack of pictures fell out and fluttered to the floor. Both she and Nangi dropped to their knees. It was Nangi who picked up the old picture of her and Calvin smiling into the camera. He pretended not to see the tears swimming in Ruby’s eyes. She handed over a glossy photo of herself and the children sitting on the sofa. It was an old picture, taken when they were stationed in California.

  The moment the door closed behind Nangi, Amber snarled. “I hope you’re happy. That money was supposed to pay for our trip back to Saipan. You haven’t changed at all; you’re still a bitch. Go to hell, Ruby.”

  Ruby wanted to kill her. “You better clean up this place. I’ll ask Bruno to come and do the repair work. I was hasty about the animals; you can keep them, but you get that cat neutered. I want this place cleaned up. And while you’re at it, clean yourself up. Soap and water cost very little, but if you don’t have the money for it, I’ll give it to you. Get it through your head, Amber, I don’t owe you anything.”

  Amber brushed impatiently at the straggly hair falling about her face. Overhead, the baby was still wailing. She had the good sense, at that point, to look embarrassed, and Ruby saw a vulnerability she hadn’t known Amber possessed. Her heart fluttered. The moment she saw Amber’s eyes fill, she turned to Rena. “Go back, I’m going to stay here for a while and ... help my sister. I’ll take a cab back to your house.”

  “What happened, Amber?” Ruby asked gently, leading her sister to the sagging couch when Rena had gone.

  Amber threw her hands into the air. “God, I don’t know. The kids, one after the other . . . Saipan ... it’s so hot over there . . . no one does housework . . . I was always tired, always pregnant... Mom and Dad ... not enough money. I couldn’t get back into the swing of things when we moved here. Look, I’m sorry I let the house go ... I’ll find a way to pay you back for the repairs . . . honestly, Ruby. I just didn’t have the energy to discipline the children, and Nangi works late hours. It isn’t easy raising so many kids. God, I don’t even know if we have enough money to pay the doctor to deliver the next one now that Nangi paid you. It’s right that he paid you.
Ruby, I’m just so damn tired.”

  “Do you really want to go back to Saipan?” Ruby whispered.

  “We don’t belong here. I guess you can see that.”

  “Were you happy over there?” Ruby asked curiously.

  “Yes, I was. There were no pressures. Nangi didn’t let you see it, but he’s tied up in knots at work. They don’t treat him the way they treat the others. He gets all the shitty jobs, and he’s the one who always has to stay late with no overtime. This should give you a laugh. He thought I was a miracle worker because we saved all that money. He didn’t know I paid you only the first year. He’s a wonderful husband. He’s never once complained about my housekeeping. I don’t know how I’m going to face him when he comes home tonight. I don’t know how to make it right.”

  “Well, I do.”

  Ruby was a whirlwind. She worked nonstop scrubbing, scouring, and sweeping. She had sent Amber upstairs to wash up and to look after the baby. By noon she had the worst of the kitchen done. The stove was so bad, she knew she would have to get a new one, but for now, she covered the burners with tinfoil. Roaches by the hundreds scurried for safety as she scoured the oven. When she was satisfied with the condition of the kitchen, she opened every window in the house. It took her an hour to dust and vacuum the living room and dining room. It took her another hour to collect the trash and lug it outside. It was one o’clock when she called to Amber to come downstairs.

  Ruby eyed her sister critically. “That’s not good enough. Go back and put on more makeup and some stockings. Surely you have a better maternity dress, at least one that’s been ironed.” Amber burst into tears.

  “Okay, okay. Stop with the tears. Look, take your time. Really fix yourself up. I’m going out; there’s something I have to do. When I get back I want to see a smile on your face.”

  Ruby sat back in the taxi, wondering if she was doing the right thing. She’d come prepared with the czarina’s ring in case things were so bad she couldn’t save the house. It was time to sell it. If she was lucky, she could maybe get five thousand dollars for it. If she haggled, she could get it up to sixty-five hundred. That would pay for Amber and her family to return to Saipan, and she would have enough left to refurbish the house and rent it out again.