Black List_Black Star Security

by Cynthia Rayne

  “Helping her out, solving her friend’s murder.” Suddenly, his throat felt dry. He took a swig of beer. It might have something to do with the way Mack was examining him, like a cluster of cells on a microscope slide.

  “And that’s it? You don’t have any ulterior motives?”

  “Even if I did, she’d never feel the same way about me.” Although, it was difficult to let go of the delusion. He’d thought about her every day for the past few years. “Lucy already told me so.”

  “Right. Because she hates you.”

  “Can you please stop saying that?” The word felt like a sucker punch.

  “You’re not paying attention.” Mack rolled her eyes. “The opposite of love is…?”

  “Hate.”

  “Wrong.” Mack groaned, as though exasperated by his ignorance. “The opposite is indifference. If she didn’t feel strongly about you, she wouldn’t care whether you lived or died.”

  “Yeah, well, I think she wants me dead.”

  “For now. Remember this though, Lucy isn’t immune to you, and you have the opportunity to change her mind.”

  It made a lot of sense. Once he thought about it, she’d rebuffed Finn’s attempts to flirt with her. Lucy had been amused, maybe even charmed, but she wasn’t tempted or angry with the man.

  And Storm could take steps to make this right.

  While he couldn’t replace everything he’d taken from Lucy, he could even the score. And maybe, just maybe she wouldn’t hate him anymore.

  What if he could even revive their attraction?

  It gave him hope, which was a dangerous thing.

  Chapter 7

  Storm woke up just before dawn.

  As soon as the alarm went off he was full of nervous energy. He hadn’t gotten nearly enough rest, but his body was keyed up anyway. Storm had spent most of the night tossing and turning, formulating a plan.

  After he crawled out of bed, he’d quietly knocked on Lucy’s door, but there was no answer. Apparently, she was still asleep. Lucy was probably exhausted after all she’d gone through. He decided to leave her alone.

  It was probably for the best. They needed a little distance anyway.

  He got dressed, grabbed a protein bar, and went to the gym to blow off some steam.

  Storm found Thomas King and Quentin Zane doing another sit up challenge. They were both former Navy SEALs who had a competitive relationship, at least when it came to physical fitness.

  Both of them were drenched in sweat, grunting through a series of sit-ups.

  “Mornin’,” King huffed. He was six feet eight with reddish blond hair, and he sported a thick layer of stubble on his chin.

  Storm mumbled in response as he stepped on the treadmill and started it up. He preferred to run sprints for exercise. Actually, he loved going for a hike, but he wanted to be around when Lucy woke up.

  Zane gave Storm a speculative glance but didn’t comment. He was thirty-two, six feet tall, and he had steely blue eyes, medium brown hair, and a sinewy, well-developed frame. Everyone on the team was fit. When you’re chasing bad guys for a living, it literally paid to be in shape.

  “What’s your deal?” King asked.

  Unfortunately, King was always asking personal questions and sticking his nose where it didn’t belong. It’s like the guy had never heard of boundaries.

  Storm had worked with both men. He’d provided the intelligence and interrogated targets, while they’d provided the muscle, snatching up tangos and foiling terrorist plots.

  “Nothing. I’m fine.”

  King snorted. “I’m not buyin’ it. You’re all fluffed up, like an old wet hen.”

  Okay, that’s it.

  “You know what? I hate Southern colloquialisms. I don’t find it charming. It’s annoying. Speak English.” Storm kicked the treadmill into high gear and started running.

  “You’re right,” Zane said. “He’s madder than a bull chewin’ on bumblebees.”

  Both of them were Southern and half the time Storm didn’t know what the fuck they were going on about. Storm had grown up on the West coast and his job had taken him all over the world. Living in Kentucky had been quite an adjustment, but he was slowly getting used to it. At the moment, he was crabby, and not in the mood to deal with their bullshit.

  “Stop talking about me like I’m not here.”

  “Then man up and tell us what’s stickin’ in your craw,” King said. “I ain’t got the time to play counselor.”

  “I didn’t get enough sleep.” It was partially true.

  Zane hmphed in response. “Such a lame excuse.”

  “Hey, are you ready to call it quits?” King asked, puffing as he shakily did one more sit-up.

  “I will, if you will, brother. Is it another draw?”

  “God yes.” King fell back on the floor with a groan. Panting, Zane collapsed too. How many times had they exhausted themselves like this?

  Why do I put up with these people?

  Storm kept right on running, trying to focus on his footfalls, and the air burning in his lungs, but it was difficult. Normally, exercise emptied his mind and centered his thoughts.

  Right now, he couldn’t think of anything else besides Lucy.

  He was a man on a mission. Storm couldn’t wait to roll up his sleeves and start working on the plan to redeem himself.

  Zane’s black German Shepherd puppy, Bomber, scurried over and sniffed him experimentally. Zane gave him a fond pat on the head, and the puppy crawled up into his lap. He stroked the dog’s head, murmuring softly to it. Zane was in charge of their K-9 unit and he had a real way with animals.

  King chugged some bottled water. “I think this is about the girl.”

  “Definitely,” Zane put in. “Even Bomber knows you’ve got it bad.”

  At one time, they’d both been confirmed bachelors. Now, they were in serious relationships. King was dating Savanah Summers, a famous country music singer, they’d protected, while Zane was seeing King’s sister, Elinor.

  In fact, everyone else at Black Star had coupled up, except for Mack. Only she has a texting boyfriend.

  Which left Storm all by himself. And it sucked.

  Suddenly being alone wasn’t so appealing. Most of his adult life, he’d never been in one place long enough to settle down. But he’d given some serious thought about putting down some roots lately.

  After all, he was no longer a company man. He wouldn’t get a phone call in the middle of the night, telling him to pack his bags and get on a plane headed for Mumbai, or some other far-off destination. Storm had the freedom to live on his own terms.

  And what…? Lucy’s gonna forget what you did to her? And then play house with you?

  Yeah, not so much.

  “Come on, tell us what’s goin’ on.” King wiped the sweat away with a towel. “Nox told us you were all over this Lucy girl.”

  “Nox should keep his mouth shut.” Storm hit the button on the machine and ran faster.

  Zane pantomimed firing a gun. “Direct hit, brother. You’ve definitely got girl troubles. Tell us about her.”

  “Fuck off.” Storm closed his eyes and mentally played St. Elmo’s Fire.

  This particular love story had already ended badly. He wasn’t going to get the girl at the end of his movie and he didn’t need them rubbing his nose in it.

  And then Lucy walked into the room.

  Storm didn’t even have to see Lucy, he could feel her presence in the room. The guys fell into a hushed silence. When Storm cracked an eye open, he found his brothers gaping at her and Lucy frowned, backpedaling a couple steps. It looked like she was about to bolt.

  Dammit. Had she heard them talking?

  “Nice to meet you, Lucy, I’m Zane and this here’s King.” Zane offered her a hand and she shook it, frowning all the while. King wiped the sweat from his hand, before touching Lucy at least.

  “Great to meet you, too.” She smiled politely.

  “So, we’d better go, King. We’ve got a
thing.” Zane got to his feet and tucked the puppy under his arm.

  King got to his feet. “What the fuck are you talkin’ about?”

  “Did you forget? It’s starting. Right now.” Zane headed for the door and beckoned King to join him.

  Storm swore under his breath. Neither one of these fools would make a decent agent.

  And then King glanced at Lucy, and then back to Storm. His eyes widened as recognition dawned.

  “Oh, right, the shit we have to do, somewhere else.” King nodded to Lucy and lumbered out the door.

  Subtle, guys, real subtle.

  “Do you mind if I…?” Lucy pointed to the free weights on the other side of the room.

  “No, of course not, help yourself.” Storm practically panted the words out. He was going so fast; his heart might explode right out of his chest. Although, he refused to slow down.

  He wanted to impress her. With what? Your racing skills?

  Okay, yeah, this is a stupid plan.

  Lucy had the unique ability to twist his insides into little knots. She made him nervous and excited all at the same time.

  “I need your help.” Storm hadn’t intended to blurt it out, it just happened.

  “With what?” Lucy sat on a nearby bench, doing bicep curls.

  “As soon as I’m done here, I’m gonna grab some breakfast, and start hacking. I’ll see if I can dig anything up on this Thomas guy.” He’d also attack Finn’s servers, but he wouldn’t mention it to Lucy. “Why don’t you join me?”

  She paused, balancing the weight on one knee. “I’m not a hacker, I’m a hitter, and I mean it literally. I punch people in the face.” She made a fist.

  No doubt, Lucy could provide him with useful insights, but he also wanted to spend time alone with her. Storm wasn’t even sure what the goal was. He doubted he’d ever get back what he lost, but maybe he could salvage their friendship at least.

  Or even just make her hate him less. He’d consider it a win if she didn’t loathe the sight of him walking into a room.

  Storm smirked. “Yeah, I’ve seen you in action before. But I need to bounce ideas off you, maybe borrow your skip tracing skills.”

  She sighed. “Fine. We’ll work together.”

  Lucy set the weight down and glanced around the room as if she was a little bit lost.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I’d like to find somebody to spar with. I need a refresher course on my hand-to-hand combat skills. Do you think Mack’s up yet?”

  He hopped off the treadmill so fast, Storm had to hold onto the wall for support. For a second, it felt like the world was spinning around him.

  “I’ll give it a go.”

  Lucy frowned. “I don’t know.”

  “I’m a little rusty, but I still remember what to do.” He stood on the mat, arms raised. More than anything, he wanted a reason to touch her. “Come on, we’re gonna grapple.”

  “No.”

  “It’ll make you feel better.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Absolutely.”

  They stood close to each other, squaring off on the mat, about a foot apart. She placed her hands on his shoulders and the next Storm knew, he was lying on his back, staring up at the ceiling.

  What the shit…?

  “You okay?” She reached down, offering him a hand, and he took it.

  Storm got to his feet. “Yeah, of course. Let’s try this again.”

  “Are you holding back with me?”

  “Of course not.” He was just distracted. And he had low blood sugar. Not to mention the beginnings of an erection.

  “You don’t need to. I’m not some girly girl who needs to be rescued. Whatever you dish out, I can take.”

  Storm already knew that. Lucy was the strongest woman he’d ever known, which was saying something. Mack, Annie, Savvy, and Ellie weren’t exactly shrinking violets.

  “Do you remember that time in the car?”

  “Which time?” she asked.

  “When we took a very long drive? To get manakeesh?”

  They’d been in Saudi Arabia, in one of the government’s staging areas. Both private contractors and military units stayed on bases together for protection. They’d snuck off one night to a local place to sample the local cuisine and then went for a long drive. Manakeesh is a lot like pizza, it’s bread topped with cheese or ground meat.

  Her nostrils flared.

  Clearly, she did remember.

  Neither one of them looked away.

  All he could think about was kissing her again.

  And then Lucy toppled him to the floor once more, only this time, she held him there with her elbows against his shoulders.

  “Fight me,” she growled.

  “I’m tired of fighting you. I wanna be on the same side again, ya rouhi.”

  “Don’t.”

  It was an Arabic endearment. Loosely translated, it meant “you are my soul.” And Lucy was. She was his conscience, a force of good, and she made him want to be a better person.

  “I can’t help myself.”

  And then he flipped her over and pinned her down on the mat. With a growl, he hauled her close to his body, so she could feel his thick erection prodding her thigh. Unable to help himself, he ground himself against her supple skin.

  Lucy squirmed but didn’t use her skills to fend him off. Instead, she bumped against him, teasing him with her body.

  “I can’t help myself. Lucy, I want you.”

  “I know.” Her voice was low and throaty. “Is there something you wanna ask me?”

  Oh, God. Is she gonna make me beg?

  “I need you. I want you so much, I can’t…” Storm could barely get the words out. He’d been obsessing about Lucy for years. Years.

  Storm panted as he imagined plunging into her sex, working his cock in and out of her. Storm wanted her arms around him. He longed to hear her low sighs and gasps of pleasure.

  “Never gonna happen.”

  “You can’t deny there’s an attraction between us.” Despite everything.

  “Go to hell.”

  “I’ve already been there.” Living without her had been painful.

  Lucy used his distraction to her advantage. She planted a foot on the ground for leverage and shoved him off, only to pin him to the ground, but this time she straddled his thighs.

  All he could think about was ripping her yoga pants off and slamming his cock home. He tugged her down until their lips were inches apart.

  Unable to help himself, Storm moaned against her mouth as he took it.

  In many ways, a kiss was more intimate than any other act. Lucy had a permanent piece of him, a bit of his soul. And he’d never get it back.

  They kissed for what felt like hours. He traced her lips, his tongue dancing with hers.

  And then Lucy shoved him away. She crawled off of him, shivering. When he looked her in the eye, his insides twisted.

  She was in tears.

  “Lucy I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I didn’t mean to—”

  “You aren’t the only one who had a lapse.”

  “So, do we need to talk?”

  “About what?” Was Lucy already trying to forget?

  “About…what happened here.” Storm gestured to the mat, in case she’d forgotten.

  She laughed and gave him a sideways look. “It was a slip-up. No big deal. So, you’re off the hook, okay?”

  It felt like she’d just slapped him. “So, it didn’t mean anything to you?”

  “Of course not.”

  She pursed her lips. “Trust me. Physical and emotional intimacy are two different things.”

  And he just knew Lucy was lying—to him and herself. She wasn’t cold, unyielding. Lucy might have a prickly outer layer, but underneath she was the same woman. He’d seen glimpses of her.

  “Well, it meant something to me.”

  Immediately, her expression crumpled.

  “Storm, I…” Her tone was shaky
, hesitant.

  “Come on, say it.” Storm didn’t want her to hold anything back.

  Lucy turned away from him. “Know what I hate the most? About our situation, I mean.”

  “What?”

  “I want it back.”

  “Want what back?” He wasn’t following her.

  “The idea of you. I miss the man I had dinners with and the long talks we had.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “I felt like you were the only person who really understood me.”

  I feel the same way.

  Even though he’d lied to her about the fact, his feelings for her had been real, Storm had been captivated by Lucy from the first.

  “I know I hurt you and I’m sorry.”

  Lucy shook her head, refusing to hear it. “Yes, but we both know you don’t mean it. Not really.”

  “Do we…? If I had it to do over again, I’d make a different choice.” Even if it cost him a position at Langley.

  She gasped. And then Lucy backed away from him. “No, you won’t toll me in again. I don’t believe you.”

  “If I have to spend the rest of my life making it up to you, I will.”

  “Allow me to be clear. When we’re done solving this case, I’m walking away, and I won’t look back. I never want to see you again.”

  Her words stung, and yet she looked doubtful. Storm wondered if he was getting to her.

  Maybe Mack had been right.

  “If that’s your final decision, I’ll respect it.”

  “Thank you.” She cocked her head to one side. “Do you regret anything else?”

  “I wish you’d been given a different assignment.”

  “Me too.”

  Langley justified all kinds of questionable behavior. A lot of nights, he’d gone home feeling dirty and used. Storm understood where she was coming from on some level. He’d fallen for Lucy in the midst of an operation, but at least he hadn’t been sent to manipulate her into falling in love with him. It just happened.

  “At the very least they should’ve fully prepared me for Hussam, and what he liked…”

  “What do you mean?”

  “He collects women, so I had to stand out, get his attention.”

  “So, he’d take you with him?”

  She nodded. “He had a particular kink I indulged, so I became one of his favorites.”