Into the Dark

by Caroline T. Patti

Jay rescues me. “No, we didn’t.” Officer Davies looks irritated at first, but he lets Jay continue. “We couldn’t see because Gage was directly in front of us. Then Mr. Andreas … ” Jay pauses, swallowing. “Then we saw him fall.”

  The memory of it all comes flooding back: Mr. Andreas pointing the gun right at Gage. That’s when I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to see Gage get shot. But Mr. Andreas didn’t shoot Gage. He shot himself.

  “Was Mr. Andreas the only one with a weapon?” This time the female officer spoke. Her voice was lighter than I expected, but it wasn’t anything close to friendly.

  I look to Jay, hoping he’ll answer again. He does. “Yeah.”

  Mr. Andreas pinned me up against the wall and wouldn’t let me go. I tried to get away from him, but he was strong, surprisingly strong.

  I didn’t know Gage was there until he yelled.

  They exchanged some words, like they knew each other. That part was confusing.

  Mr. Andreas leaned into me and said, “I don’t have much time. I’ve been searching for you, Mercy. I have so much to teach you about who you are.” Then he shoved back from me and I fell.

  While I tried to stand, Mr. Andreas pulled out a gun. I closed my eyes and covered my ears, trying not to scream.

  The loud pop was deafening. I expected Gage to drop dead on the pavement, but instead it was Mr. Andreas that quivered to the ground, the butt of the gun protruding from his mouth. Blood ran from his nose and ears. Bits of brain matter splattered the concrete like lumpy strawberry jam colored confetti.

  Gage blocked my path. At the same moment, the ground was yanked from beneath me. Gage tried to catch me as I fell, but I went down too quickly. My knees and palms were scratched and bleeding, but that was the least of my problems. I seized and convulsed on the ground as what felt like thousands of bolts of electricity coursed through me.

  Then, everything went black.

  Chapter Eight

  From her breast pocket, the female officer withdraws a Moleskine notebook. “We’ll need to interview Gage as well. What is his last name?”

  Jay and I look at each other. We don’t know. “Um, we just met him. Today. He’s new,” I say.

  Come to think of it, there isn’t much I know about Gage. He helped me out earlier in the day and, after some arm-twisting by Lyla, agreed to be my date for the party. But he wasn’t exactly the chatty type. At first, I thought he was just shy, but now I’m not so sure.

  Officer Davies scans the room. “He’s here at the hospital with you?”

  “I haven’t seen him around,” Jay answers.

  Where is Gage? He saves me from Mr. Andreas and then he just disappears? Something doesn’t add up.

  The two officers exchange a look that says they too think it’s strange that Gage isn’t at the hospital. Do they suspect him of something? Gage is innocent in all this, as much a victim as I am. Right?

  Officer Davies hands me a card, “If you hear from him you’ll give us a call.” This is a command, not a request. I nod and take the card.

  Both officers stand. The woman adjusts her suit jacket. Before departing she says, “Do you know anything about the relationship between Mercy and Mr. Andreas? Why he was at the party?” There is an implication, a suggestion in her tone that makes me feel sick to my stomach.

  “Mr. Andreas is a regular at Wally’s,” Kate says in a biting tone. “I seriously doubt he came for the party.”

  I more than appreciate Kate stepping in for me, trying to silence the idea that there is any relationship between Mr. Andreas and me. Never in a million years would I or Lyla, or anyone for that matter, have invited him to the party.

  “I guess we’ll never know,” the detective says in a condescending tone.

  “Mr. Andreas attacked me in that alley!” The words are out before I could stop them.

  The entire room turns my way. Officer Davies is about to say something, but I cut him off.

  “Not me, Mercy. He attacked Mercy.” Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I scream at myself. You’re making things worse.

  Both officers write in their notebooks. “Care to explain?” The female officer narrows her gaze until it zeroes in on me.

  “That’s what Gage told me,” I lie. “He said Mr. Andreas grabbed Mercy and that he wouldn’t let her go. Gage was trying to help her.”

  From deep within a tiny fire starts to grow. It licks at my insides, spurring me forward. I stand and meet the female officer face to face. “I don’t know what you think you know about Mercy, or Gage, or Mr. Andreas so let me tell you what I know. Tonight was supposed to be, my—” I stop, correcting myself, “—my best friend’s birthday party. Gage did nothing wrong and neither did Mercy. And if you’re trying to turn this into something else, well, that’s just pathetic.” In the corner of my vision I see the worried looks on Kate’s, Jay’s, and my dad’s faces. They’re wondering what’s come over me.

  I keep on. “Mr. Andreas shot himself and none of us know why. All we know is that it wasn’t our fault, not mine, not Mercy’s and not Gage’s. You took our statements.” Though I could hear myself talking, I don’t know where the words come from. I’m not usually this provocative, this confrontational. “Now get out and let us grieve. Our friend died tonight. That’s all that matters.”

  My rant over, I brace myself for the repercussions, but the two officers remain quiet for several moments. Finally, Officer Davies mumbles something about his sorrow for our loss and then they leave.

  The rush of adrenaline passes, and I sink back into the chair and try to catch my breath. Whatever strength I’d felt before fades and the reality that I’d just yelled at two police officers sets in. This behavior is not mine. I am never this brave.

  But Lyla is. This is exactly the kind of thing she’d say and do. She has bravado to spare, something I’d always admired and envied slightly about her.

  “Holy shit, Lyla.” Kate comes toward me, pulls me from the chair, and wraps me in a hug. “One of these days that mouth of yours is going to get you into serious trouble.”

  “Sorry, I couldn’t help it,” I tell her.

  “We should go.” Kate rubs my back one last time and then releases me from her grasp.

  Somehow, despite all my fear, despite all my sadness, I am going to have to leave the hospital. I am going to have to leave my body behind.

  “Can we do anything for you before we go, Eric?” Kate asks my dad.

  My dad. There was only one other time I’d seen him look this way. The night my mother died. Then, just like now, there was a hollowness to his expression, like he was floating above, not quite connected to the tangible world. Then, he’d come back. He had to. For me. But now, there’s nothing keeping him from the abyss. If he wants, he can completely succumb to the emptiness and let it take him.

  There are so many things I want to say to him. But it would be strange for Lyla to tell him that she loves him or that he’s a great father, so I keep quiet.

  As if Jay can sense all that I’m thinking, he casually slides his fingers through mine and gives my hand a little squeeze. I squeeze back.

  My father never answers Kate, so she rubs his shoulder and says good-bye and that she’ll check in with him soon. Kate, so much younger than my father, is his equal when it comes to parenting. She seems to know exactly what to do, what to say, as if she’s been given a manual to follow. Up until that moment I’d completely taken for granted that, like my father, Kate has lost everyone in her life. She just doesn’t know it yet.

  The walk to the car is quiet. Kate starts the engine while Jay and I say our good-byes.

  I hook my thumbs into the belt loop of Lyla’s jeans. Jay’s hands are shoved into his back pockets.

  “This isn’t right,” I say.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Look at us. We look completely uncomfortable.”

  “You sound like you. I think that’s what’s tripping me out the most. I mean the voice is Lyl
a’s, but the expression, the way you say things, it’s all you.”

  “Thank you for believing me.”

  “Mercy, what are we gonna do? I mean you can’t just … what I mean is … ”

  “I can’t pretend to be her forever, I know.” Shame and guilt nearly suffocate me.

  “Do you want me to come over?”

  Jay’s question catches me off guard. “Um, I don’t know. Should I?”

  “I think that’s what Lyla would want, but if you don’t … ” He shrugs. “I don’t know.”

  “Actually, I’d rather not be alone. I just didn’t want to ask because, well, you know why.”

  Jay smiles with only the right side of his mouth. “I’m not mad at you, Mercy. I know this isn’t your fault. I’m right behind you.” A wave of relief washes over me.

  I watch Jay jog off to his car before I open the door and climb in beside Kate. She and I had been alone together plenty of times before, but this time I am overly aware of myself. Am I sitting like Lyla, moving like she would?

  “I can’t believe she’s really gone,” Kate whispers. “It seems unreal, you know?”

  “Yeah,” is all I say in return.

  The drive isn’t too long, but it does include a trek along the freeway. Familiar street signs signal we are only five or six miles from home. Countless times I’ve driven this route going back and forth with Lyla to the mall. Multitudes of memories come back to me. The In and Out Burger which Lyla and I frequent nearly every day, always stopping for fries after school.

  Jay would meet us there, too, and man, can he eat. It was like an event for him, as if he’d just made weight for an upcoming wrestling match. He’d order two double cheeseburgers, fries, and a fountain of Mountain Dew. Lyla and I would sit across from him, noses wrinkled in disgust as we watched him inhale the entire meal. How he didn’t throw it all up later I’ll never know.

  Lyla and I are also regulars at Mimi’s Boutique, which is located across the way from In and Out. You know you spend too much money at a store when every sales clerk knows you by name. Most everyone knows Lyla. She’s a walking advertisement for Mimi’s, though she also loves Forever 21 and H&M.

  I shop at these places too, but Lyla never approves of my choices. While she opts for short shorts and skin-tight dresses, I gravitate more toward jeans and tank tops. Every once in a while I’ll throw in a skirt just to mix things up and each time Lyla will pretend to faint. When she’s finished teasing me, she always tells me how awesome I look, how beautiful I am, and that I shouldn’t be afraid to show myself off a bit.

  Who will say those things to me now? Lyla? Where are you?

  Chapter Nine

  Gage

  Rae pulls the car behind the warehouse. Zee is waiting for us, arms folded across his chest, feet shoulder width apart. His usual stance.

  “You know, I half thought she was kidding,” he says to me.

  “Is the room ready?” I ask him.

  Rae climbs out of the car and slams the door. “I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

  “Zee, is the room ready?” I ask again.

  He nods his shaved head. “Took some convincing, but Jinx came through.”

  Gingerly, I pull Mercy’s body from the backseat of the car. With Zee’s help, I cradle her in my arms and set off inside the building.

  The halls are dimly lit, but nothing about that is unusual. We prefer to keep a low profile. I pass Jinx and the Observation Deck. He shakes his head at the sight of us and falls in step with the others behind me.

  At the end of the hall, I push open a door and find what I’m looking for. Jinx has set up a hospital bed, one that we most often used for Breachers whom we need to keep medicated during interrogations. Next to the bed are the same monitors and machines that had been in Mercy’s hospital room.

  “I’ll start the IV,” Rae offers. As our resident intern, Rae handles all fluids and needles.

  “Show me how,” I say. “I can do it.”

  “Move.” Rae shoves me aside. She works a needle into Mercy’s arm and covers it with tape.

  “What are you giving her?” I ask.

  “What she needs,” Rae answers.

  Jinx stands in the corner, his hands clasped behind him. It’s difficult to take Jinx seriously when he’s angry because of his appearance. He has a full head of crazy curls that border on an afro, with a long, wide nose, and stubble that seems to be etched permanently into his face. Jinx is the character of the group, the jokester. But at the moment, there’s no levity to his mood.

  “Just say it, Jinx. I can feel your disapproval.”

  “What’s the plan here, Gage? Help me understand.” He strides toward the bed. “It looks like you stole the body of a Breacher and are planning to keep it alive. What I don’t understand is why.”

  “Mercy,” I say her name. She isn’t an it. “Her name is Mercy.”

  “You see what I mean,” Rae says to Jinx. “He’s gone off the deep end with this one.”

  “Nathaniel had the chance to kill her and he didn’t,” I tell them. “He’s been watching her for over a year. He wants something from her and we need to figure out what that is.”

  “Look, buddy,” Zee says as he steps closer to me. “This has gone on too long. Nathaniel is getting to you. He’s in your head. We can all see it.”

  I whip around. “He’s not in my head.”

  “He is, man,” Zee puts his hand on my shoulder. “Look what you’re doing. You’ve stolen a body. For what? What could you possibly hope to gain from … ” His voice trails off as a look of recognition spreads across his face. “No.”

  “Zee, hear me out,” I try, but he cuts me off.

  “No, Gage, you’re crazy.”

  “What? What’s going on?” Rae asks impatiently.

  “Don’t,” I plead with Zee.

  He ignores my request and turns to Rae and Jinx. “He’s gonna try and put her back.”

  The look of dismay on their faces is unmistakable. My shame seeps from my pores and clogs the room. Zee is right. Putting Mercy back in her body is part of my plan.

  “Gage! No!” Rae yells.

  Jinx runs his hands through his tangle of hair. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

  “Look!” I shout. “All of you! I can handle this. Everything is under control.”

  Zee balls his hands into fists and slides them into the pockets of his brown leather jacket. “Everything is not under control. You’ve gone too far. You’re not thinking clearly.”

  “I am!” I stop myself, breathing deeply to steady my shaking hands. “I know this sounds crazy and I know you don’t want to believe me, but I have to try and help her. I need to know what Nathaniel wants from her. Why shouldn’t she go back? She’s not like the others.”

  Rae rolls her eyes.

  “That’s not your choice to make, Gage,” Jinx scolds me. “The Assembled set the rules.”

  Jinx is right. It isn’t up to me. By bringing Mercy’s body here I am putting all of them in danger. Maybe I’m asking too much of them.

  I speak calmly when I say, “If any of you want out, I understand. And I won’t hold it against you if you walk away. I know what I’m asking and I know what you’re risking. You don’t need to be on this ledge with me.”

  I take Mercy’s lifeless hand in mine and stroke her cool skin with my thumb. “I’ve been fighting Nathaniel my entire life. And maybe you’re right; maybe I’m letting it get to me, I don’t know. But what I do know is that Mercy is a victim in this. She is whether you want to believe me or not. And I can’t explain why, but I know I have to help her. If I do, I know it’ll be the end of Nathaniel. I can feel it.”

  The room is dead silent as Rae, Jinx, and Zee consider my words. Rae gnaws her lip, sucking it between her teeth. I know I’ve gotten to her, but I don’t know if it’s enough for her to help me.

  “I’m in.” Zee grasps the rails of the bed. “I think you’re c
razy, but I’m in.”

  Zee looks to Rae, who looks to Jinx. He shrugs. Whatever Rae says, Jinx will go along with it.

  “Fine,” she relents. “I’m in too.”

  “One for all and all that other shit,” Jinx adds.

  “Thank you. All of you. I won’t forget this.”

  “Don’t worry, man.” Zee claps his hand against my shoulder blades. “We won’t let you.”

  “I have to find Mercy,” I tell them. “Rae, you’ll stay with her body?”

  “Just call me Nurse Ratched,” she quips.

  “Rae,” I glare at her.

  “Fine. Florence Nightingale. Better?”

  “Much.” I turn to Jinx. “Get back to the OD and see about finding Nathaniel.” Jinx nods and sets off to the Observation Deck.

  “And me, boss? What can I do?” Zee asks.

  “You can lend me some wheels,” I tell him.

  “Not the bike!” Zee roars.

  I back out of the room, arms thrown up in surrender. “I’ll bring her home safe and sound. I swear.”

  I spin on my heels and run, but not before I hear Zee yell one last time, “Not the bike!”

  Chapter Ten

  Zee’s Ducati is parked in the back of the warehouse. His prized possession, he wipes “Fiona” down every day with a cloth diaper. I’ve never been much into motorcycles, but there is something very powerful about a Ducati and right now it’s exactly what I need to get me to Lyla’s house.

  As I race through the streets all I can think about is Mercy. By now she is probably freaked out of her mind. I have a strong suspicion that I’m going to make her feel worse before it gets any better.

  The Ducati roars one last time and comes to a stop at the end of Lyla’s drive. Cutting the engine, I roll the bike up the path and park it, careful to make as little noise as possible.

  Lyla’s bedroom is around back. This I know from my surveillance of Mercy. Noiselessly, I let myself through the side gate. When I find the window I’m looking for, I knock. When nothing happens, I knock louder.