She brushed her hand over her eyes and his heart ached even more when he saw the tears that were trembling on her lashes. It was all he could do to make himself sit there and not say a word.
‘You see, I had feelings for you, too, Adam. It wasn’t all an act as you seem to believe.’
Blood roared through his head when he suddenly realised what she’d said, so that for a moment his vision blurred. Did she really think he was stupid enough to fall for that?
It seemed too incredible to be true, yet when his vision eventually cleared, he could tell that was exactly what she was hoping for and for some reason he didn’t know what to do. He knew that he should have laughed in her face and told her that there wasn’t a chance in hell of him falling for her lies a second time, yet he couldn’t quite bring himself to do that…
He flung open the Jeep door, terrified that he would make another terrible mistake if he remained there even a second longer. Lorraine must have been watching for them to arrive because she met him at the top of the steps and hurried him straight to the treatment room.
Adam grabbed the gloves June held out to him and went straight to the bed, rapping out orders to right and left, focusing every bit of his mind on the only thing that mattered at that moment, which was saving Matthias’s life. He didn’t intend to waste time thinking about Kasey and the pain she’d caused him in the past and would cause him again if he let her. He certainly didn’t intend to let himself wonder if maybe—possibly—perhaps—she’d been telling him the truth just now. He might be many things but he wasn’t that much of a fool, so help him!
‘Can someone do a cut-down? We need to get some more fluids into him, stat! He’s lost so much blood that I can’t find a decent vein in his arm.’
Kasey turned away, unable to bear to watch any more as the team continued their fight to save Matthias. David and Adam were still trying to stabilise him before they could take him through to Theatre. Joan Simpson, their expert on dengue fever, was currently cross matching blood for a desperately needed transfusion while Gordon Thompson had abandoned his typhus clinic and was now doing the cut-down—delicately slicing through the skin in Matthias’s ankle to find a viable vein. Daniel was in Theatre, getting everything ready, while the rest of the team were keeping things ticking over. She was the only one who didn’t have a proper role in the proceedings. Unless she opted for the one she’d chosen for herself.
Her heart thumped as she went back into the corridor. She knew that Adam would carry out his threat to send her home if she went to find Sarah, but maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing after all. Blurting out that she’d had feelings for him five years ago had been a really stupid thing to do and she hadn’t needed his lack of response to tell her that. All she could do now was thank her lucky stars that he hadn’t questioned her because she had no idea what she would have told him: that she’d fallen in love with him and had her heart broken as well?
Oh, please!
She strode along the corridor, furious with herself for making such a mess of everything. If she was sent home then so be it, but she was going to accomplish something before she went. Fortunately, the truck driver was still in the hospital, waiting for news of Matthias, so she went to find him. He was sitting at the nursing station, drinking a cup of tea, and he leapt to his feet as soon as she appeared.
‘How is Dr Matthias, missie?’
‘He’s still in the treatment room,’ Kasey explained. ‘Dr Adam is going to operate as soon as they manage to stabilise him.’
‘I did everything I could,’ the man said anxiously. ‘As soon as they started firing at us, I drove as fast as I could.’
‘I’m sure it wasn’t your fault,’ she said soothingly.
She glanced round when June came bustling back for some more dressings and led him away from the desk so they wouldn’t be overheard. Even though Adam was busy with his patient, he would find a way to stop her if he discovered that she was about to flout his orders. Her heart hiccuped at the thought of how he was going to react when he found out, but she couldn’t afford to let it deter her.
She smiled at the driver. ‘It’s Lester, isn’t it?’
‘That’s right, missie.’ Lester took a shiny new identity card out of his pocket and proudly pointed to his photograph. ‘Dr Matthias appointed me as his head driver and told me that I must always carry this badge with me to prove who I am.’
‘That’s excellent, Lester.’ Kasey admired the badge then handed it back to him. ‘I don’t suppose you know where Dr Matthias lives, do you?’
‘Of course. He lives on the other side of town, near to where I lived when I was a little child.’ He smiled broadly when she gasped, obviously delighted by her reaction.
‘Oh, that’s wonderful! Then you can you tell me how to get there, can’t you?’
‘No, no. It is not safe for you to go there, missie,’ Lester said anxiously. ‘There are too many bad people about.’
‘What if you came with me?’ she suggested quickly. ‘It would be safer if there were two of us and much easier if I had you along to show me the way. I don’t know my way round the town like you do so I could get lost.’
‘I don’t know…Maybe Dr Adam wouldn’t be happy about you going there. I wouldn’t like to do anything to upset him so perhaps you should ask him first.’
Kasey shook her head. She already knew what Adam’s answer would be. ‘Dr Adam is very busy at the moment and I don’t want to bother him. I shall take full responsibility, Lester, so you don’t have to worry about getting into trouble. We’ll take the Jeep instead of the truck because it will be quicker.’
She bustled Lester towards the door before he could raise any more objections. There was nobody about when they left the hospital and she breathed a sigh of relief. Adam had left the keys in the ignition—an unprecedented move for someone who was normally so careful, but then he had been rather upset at the time.
Kasey started the engine, refusing to think about why Adam had been so upset. They left the hospital and she followed Lester’s directions as they drove through the town. They came to a junction and she automatically slowed down in case there was any other traffic coming, but Lester shook his head.
‘No, no, miss. Keep driving. Don’t stop. It’s too dangerous.’
Kasey’s stomach churned when he pointed to a gang of youths loitering near the remains of a burnt out truck. They were eyeing the Jeep with interest so she stamped on the accelerator and they shot across the junction. Lester told her to make a left turn and her nervousness increased as they drove along a series of increasingly narrow side streets, lined on both sides with tumbled-down buildings. There were a lot of people about and they all stopped to watch as she drove past. By the time they reached Matthias’s house she was starting to wish she’d never set out on the journey and the thought of having to drive all the way back wasn’t something she relished.
She switched off the engine and turned to Lester. ‘I’ll see if Sarah is home.’
‘And I shall stay here and look after the Jeep,’ Lester told her, looking around nervously.
‘I’ll be as quick as I can,’ she assured him, scrambling out of the Jeep.
She hurried up the path and banged on the front door of the tiny, tin-roofed bungalow. In contrast to some of the areas they’d driven through, this part of the town seemed relatively quiet. There were just a few people about and no sign of the gangs that had alarmed her so much. She knocked on the door again then jumped when it suddenly opened and a tall, slender black woman appeared.
‘Sarah?’
‘Yes.’ The woman’s face broke into a sudden smile. ‘You must be one of the doctors from the hospital! I’m so glad that Matthias has brought you to our house at last. I’ve been begging him to invite you all round for dinner—’
‘Sarah, Matthias hasn’t brought me here. I came on my own.’ Kasey reached out and gripped Sarah’s hands, seeing the fear that suddenly clouded her eyes.
‘Something has happe
ned. It’s Matthias, isn’t it? He’s—’
‘He’s been shot. He’s in the hospital and he’s going to need an operation,’ Kasey said quickly, squeezing her hands. ‘He’s very poorly but he was alive when I left.’
‘He’s alive!’ Sarah suddenly slumped against the wall and would have fallen if Kasey hadn’t grabbed her.
‘Yes, and I’m going to take you to see him. Do you think you can walk to the car?’
‘Yes…Of course. I’m sorry…It was just the shock…’
Sarah made a courageous effort to pull herself together and Kasey smiled at her. ‘You’re doing great. Let’s just get you into the car.’
She took Sarah’s arm and helped her to the Jeep. Once Sarah was settled, she got in and started the engine. It was already starting to go dark and she knew that night would fall before they reached the hospital.
She turned the vehicle around and headed back the way they’d come, glad of Lester’s help because everywhere looked so different in the dark. They came to the junction again and she didn’t need his encouragement this time as she floored the accelerator. One glance at the gang of young men standing on the corner was enough to tell her that it would be a mistake to linger. It was a relief when they reached the hospital and she pulled up in front of the main doors. Switching off the engine, she turned to Lester with a smile of thanks, which faded abruptly when a figure suddenly appeared from inside the building.
Kasey’s heart felt like a yo-yo being jerked about on its string as she watched Adam walking towards them, because even in the darkness she could tell that he was furious. He didn’t even glance at her as he opened the door and helped Sarah out.
‘Matthias has just left Theatre,’ he told Sarah without any preamble. ‘He’s very ill but he’s alive.’
‘Oh, thank you, thank you.’ Tears flowed down Sarah’s cheeks and Adam put his arm around her shoulders.
‘I’ll take you straight in to see him,’ he said gently, so gently, in fact, that Kasey felt her own eyes fill with tears because she knew he wasn’t going to treat her so tenderly.
She followed them inside, thanking Lester for his help and assuring him that he wasn’t in any trouble. Once she’d dealt with him, she went to find Adam because there was no point putting it off. He was waiting outside his office for her and he didn’t say a word as he ushered her inside.
Kasey sat down in front of the desk because it seemed wiser to be seated when the full weight of his wrath descended on her. Adam closed the door then sat down and the very quietness of his actions warned her just how angry he was. Picking up a manila folder, he took out a sheet of paper and pushed it across the desk towards her.
‘This terminates your contract with the agency. All you need to do is sign it at the bottom. I’m not sure when we shall be able to fly you home. It depends when the next delivery of supplies is scheduled to arrive. In the meantime, you are relieved of your duties—’
‘No way!’ Kasey pushed the form away. ‘I’m willing to accept that you can send me home for disobeying your orders, Adam, but there is no way that I’m going to sit around all day and do nothing until you get rid of me.’
‘It isn’t up to you to decide what you will and won’t do,’ he said harshly. His green eyes bored into her and she shivered when she saw the fury they held. ‘This is my decision, Dr Harris, and it isn’t open for discussion.’
He pushed back his chair, making it clear that the meeting was over, but there was no way that she was going to agree without putting up a fight.
She leapt to her feet. ‘And if your decision had been based purely on what I did tonight then I’d accept it, but it wasn’t. You’ve already admitted that you couldn’t wait to get rid of me, so at least have the guts not to lie about why you’re stopping me from working. It’s pettiness, Adam, sheer, bloody-minded pettiness that’s behind it!’
He was round the desk in a flash, moving so fast that she barely had time to blink before he was in front of her. Kasey took a step back because the expression on his face was enough to make even the bravest person back down, but he simply hauled her back.
‘Have you any idea what could have happened to you?’ he bit out savagely.
‘I can’t imagine it would be much worse than having to put up with the way you’ve been treating me!’ she retorted, hating to feel at such a disadvantage.
He ignored that as he bent and stared into her eyes. ‘You could have been shot. You could have been raped. You could even have been kidnapped and held to ransom because that’s what happens in countries where the whole infrastructure has broken down. That’s three options so how do you fancy any of those?’
He laughed softly when she didn’t reply. ‘Of course, I’m assuming that anyone would think it was worth bothering with you. They might just have killed you and taken the Jeep because it’s worth far more than some foolish woman who doesn’t have the sense to understand what she’s getting herself into.’
‘That’s enough! I know you’re angry, Adam—’
‘No, you don’t. You have no idea how I feel.’
He hauled her towards him so fast that the breath whooshed from her body as they suddenly collided. Kasey raised her hands to push him away, wanting to set some space between them so she could deal with this rationally, yet the moment her hands touched him, they forgot what they were doing.
Heat flashed along her veins, lightning finding its own special conductor from him to her, and she gasped, heard him gasp as well, felt the tension in the air increase until it seemed as though the whole world would implode on itself. And then his head dipped and his mouth found hers and all the emotions gelled into one overwhelming force, anger and frustration turning to passion in a single beat of her heart.
Adam kissed her and she kissed him back, kissed him and clung to him, murmured his name, wrapped her arms around his neck and held on because she didn’t care what had prompted the kiss, only cared that it should continue. And it did. It did!
‘Adam, Adam.’
She murmured his name in a frenzy of need, her fingers sliding through the crisp, dark hair on the back of his head, feeling the strong bones of his skull, the heat of his skin, and his mouth moved lower, found her breast, suckled her through her shirt and her bra.
Sensations exploded inside her until she didn’t think she could stand any more yet there were many more to come: the first tingling chill of excitement when he stripped off her blouse and bra; the velvet roughness of his tongue on her sensitised nipples; the hardness of his erection pressing against the junction of her thighs; her own dampness…
‘No!’ He dragged himself away and she flinched when she heard the contempt in his voice. ‘I am not letting this happen again!’
‘Adam—’ she began, her voice trembling with shock and need.
‘Here.’
He thrust her blouse and bra towards her and she took them automatically, although her hands were shaking so much that she couldn’t manage to put them on. He muttered something harsh as he took the blouse from her again and helped her into it, his touch so impersonal now that she almost laughed. Only, if she gave in to her emotions, she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to stop.
He fastened the buttons and stepped back as though he found it repugnant to touch her, and that hurt far more than anything else could have done. This man had just kissed her, caressed her, brought her body and his own to life in the most glorious way possible, yet he could no longer bear to touch her!
She stood up straighter, knowing that the only thing she had left now was her dignity. ‘I can’t stop you if you insist on sending me home. However, I want to make it clear that I shall continue to work the shifts I’m rostered for until you can arrange for me to be repatriated.’
‘If that’s what you wish.’ He walked around the desk and sat down. ‘As for your future with Worlds Together, it will be up to you to decide if you want to carry on working for them on other missions. I won’t put anything in my report about you deliberately
ignoring my orders, so your future with the agency won’t be compromised in any way.’
‘In case I mention what happened afterwards?’ She laughed bitterly. ‘Don’t worry, Adam, it isn’t something I’m keen to publicise either so it will be our little secret.’
‘If you wish to make a formal complaint about my behaviour tonight, that is your right. I certainly won’t try to deny that what I did was wrong.’
His head came up and he stared back at her: Adam Chandler at his most arrogant and daunting.
‘And I have no intention of making a complaint.’ She held his gaze because she didn’t want there to be any mistake about this. ‘We both know that I could have stopped you any time I chose to do so, Adam. I wasn’t the victim of an unsolicited sexual attack and I have no intention of claiming that I was to get back at you. I take full responsibility for my actions. I always have.’
She swung round and opened the door, pausing when he said softly behind her, ‘I’m sorry, though, Kasey. Really sorry.’
‘Me, too,’ she whispered, although she wasn’t sure if he’d heard her, let alone understood what she was apologising for.
She left the office and made her way outside. The Jeep was still parked where she’d left it and she got in. It was just gone eight when she arrived at the hostel and she went straight to her room, relieved that she didn’t meet anyone on the way. June was working that night with Mary and everyone else would be in the dining room.
Frankly, the thought of food was more than she could face so she collected her wash-bag and took a shower then got ready for bed. There would be time enough in the morning to tell everyone that she was leaving and, in the meantime, she’d work out some sort of story to explain why she was going. She couldn’t possibly tell them the truth, which was that Adam hated her.
Tears welled to her eyes but she blinked them away. She wouldn’t say or do anything to show that she was upset. She would behave with dignity throughout the rest of her time in Mwuranda so that nobody would blame Adam when she left. It wasn’t his fault that they couldn’t work together. It was hers. The wound she’d inflicted on him had gone too deep for him to forgive her and that was what she’d tried to apologise for in the office.
The Forever Assignment Page 7
