She was truly sorry that she’d hurt him, even though she’d thought it had been justified at the time. Now she could see how wrong it had been to cause him so much pain. Maybe he had hurt her brother, but she was no longer sure if he’d realised how harmful those comments he’d made to Keiran had been.
Adam wasn’t deliberately cruel and the proof of that was the fact that he’d stopped tonight when he could so easily have carried on and made love to her. It would have been the perfect way to even the score between them but he hadn’t done it.
That hadn’t been the action of a cruel man, a bully, and all of a sudden it felt as though she no longer knew what was right or wrong any more. For all this time she’d believed that Adam had shown a blatant and relentless disregard for her brother’s feelings, but had he?
It was a question she couldn’t answer, and that was the most difficult thing of all—to suddenly have these doubts when she’d been so certain before. What made it all the more poignant was knowing in her heart that she and Adam could have found real happiness together if only they’d had the chance.
CHAPTER FIVE
‘YOUR foot is healing beautifully. You’ve been a very brave girl, Amelia. We’ll soon have you running about again.’
Adam tried to shrug off the despondency that had been his constant companion for the past couple of days as he smiled at the girl. He was in the middle of a ward round so he said goodbye to Amelia and moved to the next bed, sighing when he saw the frosty look June gave him as she handed him the next patient’s notes. Although nobody had said anything to him about Kasey’s impending departure, it was obvious they blamed him for sending her home because there was a definite chill in the air whenever he was around and it simply added to his overall feeling of self-disgust. He should never have kissed Kasey like that!
His hands shook as he hung the clipboard on the end of the bed and he saw June glance at him. ‘Too much coffee, I’m afraid. I’m probably on a caffeine high.’
‘Funny, that’s what Kasey said as well,’ June observed loftily.
Adam folded his arms. ‘OK. Spit it out. I can tell you’re dying to say something.’
‘I just think it’s wrong that Kasey should be sent home.’ June gave him a gimlet-eyed stare. ‘Oh, I know she’s told everyone that it was her decision but I don’t believe her. And neither does anyone else. She’s going home because you’re sending her home, isn’t she?’
‘Yes. Kasey deliberately went against my orders. I warned her what the consequences would be if she went to find Sarah, and she chose to ignore me, so that’s why I’m sending her back to England.’
‘But nothing happened! She got back safely and she brought Sarah with her. Surely you could reconsider—’
‘No.’ He shook his head. ‘I’m sorry, June, but my decision is final. I cannot have people going off on their own whenever they feel like it. Now, if you don’t mind, we need to get on. I do have a full list this morning.’
June didn’t say anything else; she remained tight-lipped throughout the rest of the ward round, answering his questions as briefly as possible. Adam didn’t make an issue of it even though it was galling to be cast in the role of villain. They came to Matthias’s room and he breathed a sigh of relief when June was called away. At least he wouldn’t get the cold-shoulder from his friend.
‘So how do you feel today?’ he asked, glancing at the notes the night staff had made. Despite extensive damage to his large intestine, Matthias was making steady progress. David had performed a colostomy—an operation in which part of the colon is brought through an incision in the abdomen—then removed the section of colon that had been ripped apart when the bullet had entered the body. There’d been a lot of damage to the surrounding tissue and blood vessels so Adam had dealt with that himself, working late into the night to make sure Matthias had had the best chance possible of recovering. It had been worth it because in the last twenty-four hours, they’d updated his status from critical to serious.
‘As though I have been gored by a bull.’ Matthias smiled weakly when his wife tutted. ‘I know, my love. I should not complain when it was my own fault for getting in the way of that bullet.’
‘Sounds as though you’re in the dog house,’ Adam observed with a grin.
‘And so he should be,’ Sarah said tartly. ‘He tells me not to go out of the house then goes all the way to the airfield with only a driver to help if they encounter trouble!’
‘The way to hell is paved with my good intentions.’ Matthias smiled at his wife. ‘But you still love me so that is all that matters.’
‘I give up!’ Sarah stood up. ‘I shall go and see if one of the nurses can spare a few minutes to talk to me. At least I will enjoy some sensible conversation then!’
She swept out of the room and Matthias sighed. ‘She must have been so frightened when she found out what had happened to me. I shall never forgive myself for that.’
‘The best way to make amends is to get better,’ Adam told him rousingly. ‘And from the look of this chart, you seem to be making excellent progress.’
‘Thanks to you and David. I owe you both my life and I shall never forget that. Nor will I forget what Dr Harris did. Going to fetch Sarah was a very brave thing to do.’
Adam shook his head when he heard the reproof in Matthias’s voice. ‘If you’re going to tell me that I’ve been too hard on her, save your breath. She should never have driven all that way on her own.’
‘No, she shouldn’t. But I hate to think that I have been the cause of this…disharmony.’
Adam laughed. ‘You aren’t to blame. Kasey and I have a history of disharmony, as you so delicately put it.’
‘Is that why you are sending her home? Not because of what she did the other day but because of something that happened in the past?’
‘It probably didn’t help,’ he admitted truthfully. ‘But sending her back to England is for her own good. Anything could have happened to her the other night. You know that as well as I do.’
‘Ah! So it’s because you care about her?’ Matthias said rather smugly.
‘Don’t go putting words into my mouth. I’m sending Dr Harris home because she can’t follow orders. Period!’
‘Excuse me.’
Adam’s heart sank when he turned and found Kasey standing behind him. It was obvious that she’d overheard what he’d said. He’d seen very little of her since the other night. When he’d come into work the following day, he’d discovered that she’d altered the rosters so that she could work with David from then on. He could have objected, of course, because it wasn’t up to her to make such changes, but it hadn’t seemed worth making a fuss. The less time they spent around each other until she returned to England, the easier it would be, he’d reasoned, so it was galling to have been caught discussing her like that.
‘Did you want me?’ he asked rather too sharply.
‘There’s a woman in Reception who wants to speak to you. I told her you were busy but she was adamant that she has to see you.’
‘Did she tell you what it was about?’
‘No. She refused to tell me anything else.’
‘Then you’d better show her to my office.’ He checked his watch. ‘If you’re not needed in Theatre, could you stay with her? I should only be a couple of minutes now.’
‘Of course.’
Adam sighed as he watched her walk away. Once again he’d handled the situation badly. There’d been no need to be so abrupt with her when she’d been merely passing on a message. He needed to address this problem before she left, because the last thing he wanted was for them to part on such bad terms.
The thought startled him because it really shouldn’t matter what Kasey thought of him. Her opinion should have been the least of his problems yet he was too honest to lie to himself. He did his best not to dwell on it while he examined Matthias, however, because he didn’t want anything to spoil his concentration in case he missed something vital. Peritonitis was always a m
ajor concern in a case like this. Once bacteria escaped from the intestine and spilled into the abdominal cavity, it could cause inflammation of the peritoneum—the membrane lining the abdominal cavity and covering the abdominal organs. It was something he was anxious to avoid so he carefully felt Matthias’s abdomen, checking for any signs of tension or bloating, but everything appeared to be fine. The fact that his friend’s temperature was normal and that he’d not been vomiting were also good signs. Stripping off his gloves, he gave Matthias the good news as he washed his hands.
‘Everything is looking very positive, I’m pleased to say. We’ll close the wound in a couple of days but I think you’re going to avoid most of the usual complications.’
‘Put it down to clean living,’ Matthias joked.
‘How about the skill of the surgical team?’ Adam countered. ‘Not to mention all the nursing care you’ve received.’
‘Hmm, I suppose that did have something to do with it,’ Matthias agreed with a smile. ‘You have an excellent team working here, Adam. Every single person is so highly skilled. It would be a shame to lose any of them for whatever reason.’
Adam raised an eyebrow. ‘This wouldn’t be another attempt to get me to change my mind about Kasey, would it?’
‘Yes. She’s good at her job, she gets on well with the rest of the team and—’
‘And she has a problem following orders.’ He shook his head. ‘Sorry, but my mind is made up and nothing you can say will make me change it. Dr Harris will be flown home as soon as I can get her on a plane.’
He bade Matthias goodbye and left the ward, pausing only long enough to tell June that he was needed in the office and after that he would be in Theatre. Their own theatre tent had been set up in the grounds of the hospital now so they’d been able to double the workload. David had decided to stay in the hospital’s theatre, leaving the mobile unit to him. It suited Adam fine because there was less risk of him bumping into Kasey if he spent most of his time outside the building.
It was disquieting to admit that he’d tailored his working life to fit around Kasey because he wasn’t used to having to compromise. As he strode into his office, he promised himself that once she’d left, he would get back to normal. Kasey was sitting in his chair and she stood up when he appeared, but he waved her back to her seat as he introduced himself to the blonde-haired woman occupying the other chair.
‘I’m Adam Chandler. I believe you wanted to speak to me.’
‘Claire Morgan.’ She stood up to shake hands with him and he was surprised to see that she was wearing what looked very much like a nun’s habit—a plain, dark blue dress with white collar and cuffs. She must have seen his surprise because she laughed.
‘I’m not really a nun, although this is one of the dresses they wear. They decided it would be safer if I wore the same clothes as them so I wouldn’t attract too much attention on the way here.’
‘I see. But what are you doing in Mwuranda?’ he queried.
‘Claire is an overseas aid worker,’ Kasey explained before the other woman could answer. She shrugged when he glanced at her. ‘She was flown out here last year to assess the situation.’
‘And you’ve stayed here all this time?’ he asked, turning back to the newcomer because it seemed wiser to focus on her rather than on Kasey. Now that they were back in the office, it was hard not to think about what had happened the other night. He kept getting flash-backs, recalling how it had felt to kiss her, caress her, feel her body pressed against his…
‘It wasn’t out of choice, I assure you,’ Claire replied.
‘You mean someone forced you to stay in Mwuranda,’ he clarified, trying to steer his thoughts into safer waters. He would drive himself mad if he kept thinking about the other night. It had been a mistake and he should thank his lucky stars that he’d had the sense to stop when he had, but his body was tingling as the memories came flooding back. Kissing Kasey had been the most wonderful experience he’d had in years and there was no point trying to deny it.
‘Something rather than someone,’ Claire corrected, laughing. ‘I was meant to fly home once I’d established what kind of aid was needed here. At the time, it looked as though the conflict was over but then there was another coup and rebel forces took control of the airfield. All flights into the country were banned so I ended up staying at the orphanage where I was based. Fortunately, many Mwurandans are very religious people and the rebel fighters have left the nuns alone.’
‘I see, although surely you could have flown home on the plane that brought us here?’ he suggested.
‘I could but I’d have felt as though I was leaving the nuns in the lurch.’ She sighed. ‘Most of them are very old and frail, I’m afraid. That’s why I wanted to see you, in fact. Sister Eleanor fell the other day and broke her hip so I was hoping you might be able to send someone over to see her.’
‘Would it be possible to bring her to the hospital?’
‘I don’t think she’d survive the journey. She doesn’t complain, bless her, but she’s in a great deal of pain,’ Claire explained. ‘There are also a lot of children in the orphanage who need treating. They suffered the most terrible injuries during the fighting so if you could spare one of your doctors for a couple of days, it would make a huge difference.’
‘If Sister Eleanor has broken her hip, she’ll need more than a visit from a doctor. She’ll need surgery and proper nursing care afterwards—’ Adam began.
‘That’s where I come in. I’m a qualified nurse so I can look after her. Kasey told me that she’d be willing to help us so now all we need is your blessing…Oh, and a surgeon, of course. That’s vital!’
Adam didn’t know what to say. He knew he should refuse because they really didn’t have enough staff to send a team to the orphanage when they were hard-pressed as it was to keep on top of the work at the hospital. He opened his mouth to explain as gently as he could that it just wasn’t possible when Kasey interrupted.
‘Please, Adam. I know how pushed we are, but just think of all those children. They desperately need our help, so isn’t there anything we can do for them?’
It would have needed a much harder heart than his to withstand the beseeching note in her voice and he sighed. ‘All right. I’ll see what I can come up with, but I’m not making any promises, you understand?’
‘I do. Thank you,’ she said, smiling at him so that his heart—which had already been acting oddly—kicked up another storm.
‘And thank you from me, too.’ Claire held out her hand and he shook it, trying not to think about how wonderful it felt to be on the receiving end of Kasey’s smile. It was stupid to let himself get carried away.
Claire asked him for some paper and quickly drew them a map so they would be able to find the orphanage. She left soon after that, obviously eager to go back and tell everyone the good news. Kasey came around the desk and stopped in front of him.
‘Thank you again for agreeing to help, Adam.’
‘I must be mad to add to our workload,’ he said wryly.
‘No, you’re not mad. You care about people and that’s what makes you the person you are.’ She touched him lightly on the arm then quickly left the office and he heard her footsteps hurrying along the corridor.
Adam took a deep breath and it felt as though the tension which had had him in its grip for the past couple of days had suddenly melted away. He hadn’t realised just how stressful he’d found it to be at loggerheads with her. It simply reinforced his desire to make his peace with her before she went back to England, but would it be possible to do that?
He obviously still had feelings for her because otherwise he wouldn’t react the way he did around her, so maybe he needed to decide how he really felt about her and start from there…
His thoughts flicked sideways and his mouth compressed as he hurriedly left the office. Deciding that he was still in love with her wasn’t an option!
‘You need to turn left just after that burnt-out truck.’
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Kasey pointed out the turning then grabbed hold of the door as the Jeep swung round the corner. She checked the map Claire had left them and nodded. ‘Yep. This is the right road. She’s marked that hotel just here.’
She held out the map so Adam could check for himself that they were going the right way, still finding it hard to believe that he’d asked her to accompany him to the orphanage. She’d expected him to take Daniel but he’d sought her out at dinner the previous night and asked her if she would go with him. It had been a very public olive branch and she’d had no hesitation about accepting it.
Maybe it marked an upturn in their relationship, she thought wistfully, then stamped on the thought before it had time to put down any roots. There was no point setting herself up for a disappointment.
‘Take the next turning on the right then straight across at the crossroads…’ She paused when she spotted a familiar stretch of road up ahead. ‘I came this way the other day when I went to fetch Sarah!’
‘Did you?’ Adam began to slow down as they approached the intersection.
‘No, don’t slow down!’ she warned him, pointing to the gang of youths on the corner. ‘Lester told me it was too dangerous to stop so drive straight across.’
Adam didn’t say anything but she saw his hands grip the steering-wheel and had a good idea what he was thinking as they crossed to the other side.
‘You need to turn left again just here,’ she instructed quietly, knowing that she’d deserved that telling-off he’d given her. Driving on her own had been a crazy thing to do. Not only had she put her life and Lester’s at risk but she might have lost the Jeep. There were very few ser-viceable vehicles in the country and one like this, in good working order, was a highly valuable commodity. It made her see that she owed Adam an apology.
The Forever Assignment Page 8
