Fame

by Susan X Meagher

  There was a big crowd set up, with most people lying on beach blankets surrounding the stage. It was awfully nice to have people who could set up a small but sturdy stage, light it, and get it amplified in just a couple of hours, but when you had a full roster of union guys looking to have fun, it was all part of the deal.

  Haley went over and put her name on the list, then she came back to sit next to Charlie. Piper was just behind, watching them chat quietly as various members of the crew sonically embarrassed themselves. Someone had once said that karaoke was just an excuse for people who were very good singers to be able to boast without shame, but Piper kind of liked listening to people who had to climb up and down the scale to find the right note. That was kind of charming.

  After having had two drinks, Piper was slowly coming down from the adrenaline high of maneuvering her way around all of the issues that had come up in her meetings. Charlie had been dutifully impressed, but Haley had been pretty reserved in her praise. She just didn’t seem her usual bouncy self, which made Piper a little twitchy. Haley sucked pretty bad at hiding her feelings, so there was something going on. It would just take a while for them to have time alone for Piper to figure out exactly what that something was.

  A guy was doing a pretty good Billy Joel cover when the DJ signaled to Haley. She got up and adjusted her blouse, ran her fingers through her hair, then gave Piper a kind of wan smile and headed for the stage.

  Piper’s phone buzzed, and she pulled it from her pocket to see Tim’s assistant’s name on the screen. “Gotta take this,” she said quietly to Charlie. “Be right back.”

  It was too loud to hear, so she raced back into the dining room and spent a few minutes approving the statement Tim was going to put out about Charlie. It was a pretty standard blurb about how he respected and supported her through this shocking invasion of her privacy, and Piper quickly signed off on it. Then she went back out and stopped abruptly as she heard the first few bars of Haley’s song.

  Haley had been dead wrong when she’d said her voice wasn’t anything special. It was warm and full and really, really sexy. Lower than Piper would have guessed, and full of heart.

  Piper was vaguely familiar with the song, but she hadn’t heard it for years. They must not have been into the same music at all, but she could easily see herself listening to Haley sing this kind of thing all night long.

  Alone on the raised porch, looking out over the crew, Piper marveled at how attentive everyone was. They’d been goofing off and talking during most of the other songs, but every set of eyes watched Haley sing her heart out. There was honestly no other way to describe it. Her eyes were closed, with the mic held very close to her mouth, both hands wrapped around it. Her body swayed slightly with the words sliding from her lips as she built to a crescendo, and when she reached it, her eyes fluttered open and locked on Piper.

  “Seems like we’re always blowing whatever we’ve got going. And it seems at times with all we’ve got, we haven’t got a prayer.”

  The words hit her like Haley had slapped her across the face. Her hand rose and touched her cheek, sure the skin would be hot. But it was cool and unmarked, much to her surprise.

  Haley kept going, letting her gaze travel around the audience, not returning to Piper until she finished, quietly singing, “Just once,” in a tremulous voice, then dropped her head and took a bow as the crowd whooped and applauded lustily.

  Piper simply stared at her, stunned by the words, the emotion Haley had conveyed, the heated look they’d shared. A couple of women jumped up on the stage and draped their arms around Haley’s shoulders. Then the mood changed abruptly when they started to sing a TLC tune that had been really popular when Piper had been in junior high.

  Unsteady, she held onto one of the porch supports, just watching. Then Charlie was next to her, with Delta enthusiastically licking her face.

  “You okay?” Charlie asked.

  “Sure. Sure. I guess I’m just tired. Long day,” she added.

  “Wanna hit the rack? This is a little too much excitement for Delta. He really wanted to get up on stage with Haley since she’s his favorite,” she said, making a cute pouty face.

  “I’d love to call it a night. But shouldn’t we wait for Haley?”

  “She’s singing like five songs in a row!” Charlie said, laughing. “Before she started, she said she’d see us tomorrow.”

  “All right,” Piper said, taking one last, lingering look at the woman who’d thoroughly managed to perplex her.

  ***

  Even though she was bone-tired, Piper couldn’t sleep. Delta was with Charlie, giving her no one to blame for tossing and turning as the events of the day replayed in her head on a seemingly endless loop.

  How was she ever going to go back to the pleasant tedium of cutting the same heads of hair day in and day out? Haley had been so fucking right. No one got a taste of power, of influence, and simply gave it up. It was too damned compelling! But she’d promised. Again and again.

  Piper got up and sat on the edge of the bed, a surprisingly nice one for a tent. Well, not so surprising. These beds had been brought in for Tim’s kids. They, like Charlie, were special. And if Piper continued on as Charlie’s manager, she’d be special too.

  Annoyed by the images that assaulted her: of nice cars, sweet vacations, luxe film locations, hefty bank balances, she walked over to the screen that covered the entrance to her tent. All of that stuff was nice. No doubt about that. But to have another chance with Haley, just once, she’d gladly pick up her trusty shears and head right back to Woodland Hills. In fact, she’d go in the morning. But the look on Haley’s face when she sang gave Piper a sick feeling in her gut. That look said their once might have already passed.

  ***

  On Friday morning, Haley fought off the fatigue from staying up too late singing to force herself out of bed while it was still mostly dark. After doing three loops of the island, she went back to the spot she’d stowed her yoga mat, and placed it near her favorite tide pooling spot. The tide had peaked, and probably wouldn’t go low enough to explore before she had to be on set. But this was still a magically beautiful spot, with just the crowns of the massive rocks appearing when the gentle surf calmed. She didn’t normally practice yoga in such a public spot, but given how late most people had stayed up, and how much alcohol had been flowing, she thought the odds were good that the majority of the crew would stay in bed as long as they could.

  Her brisk walk hadn’t loosened her up, so she started out with some gentle poses, just hoping to get her muscles and joints ready to take some pressure. She’d just gotten into a good camel pose, kneeling, with her hands cupped around her ankles, chest pointing at the sky, neck extended, when she heard a soft voice say, “Hi.”

  Slowly raising her head, Haley turned to see a sheepish-looking, bedraggled Piper gazing at her. She might have been wearing what she’d slept in, a wrinkled crew T-shirt and some roomy plaid boxers. No shoes, hair not brushed.

  Even though she’d just gotten started, Haley stood and rolled up her mat, brushing off the sand as she secured it with a strap. “Is everything okay? You don’t look so good.”

  “I went by your tent and peeked in through the window. When I saw you were gone I figured you’d be here.” She let her gaze wander along the beach. “Somewhere around here.”

  “Yeah, I’m somewhere around here. You look like you need coffee. Want to go get breakfast?”

  “No.” Piper put her hand on Haley’s arm, gently holding her in place. “It’s taken me a few hours, but I think I know why you seemed…whatever you were last night.”

  “Let’s walk,” Haley said, dropping her mat to the ground. “Do you mind?”

  “Whatever,” she said, shrugging.

  This was not how she wanted to have this conversation. Haley had planned on clearing her head, then finding a quiet spot to work this all out. Only then was she going to talk to Piper. But, prepared or not, there was no way out at this point.

>   They’d only gone a few steps when Piper continued. “I’m not going to lie about this. I loved making a difference yesterday. I loved having some pretty important people treat me like I was smart.” She turned her head a little, letting Haley see the fire in her eyes. “I know people think I’m a good stylist, but…” Her eyes fluttered closed for a few seconds. “It just felt great. I don’t think I’m any kind of genius, but I’ve always suspected I could have done well in college if I’d had the chance. It’s been kind of a lingering disappointment that I didn’t get the opportunity to see how far I could go.”

  “You’re clearly bright, Piper. Everyone who talks to you can sense that.”

  “Yeah. Whatever,” she said again. “But that’s not the same as having people who’ve proven themselves pay attention to you. I convinced people of stuff yesterday. Just with logic and good arguments.” She swallowed noticeably, head down. “Yesterday was like being in one of my childhood fantasies. A fantasy I was sure would never come true.”

  “Oh, Piper,” she said, her heart clenching at the fragile, yet proud expression on her face.

  She turned again, with her sad eyes locking on Haley. “I think I could be good at this. Really good. But I promised you I’d go back to cutting hair. I can do that,” she insisted. “I know the last place you want to be is on another movie so…”

  “Piper—” She began, only to be cut off.

  “If you’re willing to try again, I’ll go right back to Woodland Hills the minute this movie wraps. The childhood dream isn’t nearly as important as having—”

  This time Haley firmly cut her off. “Things have changed for me,” she said, wincing when Piper gave her a panic-stricken look.

  “Changed how?”

  It was so hard to look at Piper’s anxious face and get her words out. But she had to. She simply had to. “Well, I know I’m applying a ridiculous double standard, but I’ve begun to realize that I really dig being back on a film.”

  “You dig…?”

  “Yeah. Some of my buddies from the wardrobe department are signing onto a little indie being shot in Sicily. The producers don’t have a big budget, but they’ve got six dogs who have to be trained and I thought I’d—”

  “You want to be on a movie again?” Piper’s expression shifted dramatically, to reveal a huge smile. “You really want to?”

  “I’m thinking about it. I’ve got a week or two to decide…”

  She stopped and grasped Haley by the shoulders. “That’s fantastic! There’s almost always some kind of animal in the movies Charlie’s in, and if not…” Her lips pressed together as she seemed to think. “I’ll be making really good money, so you won’t have the pressure to make rent. You can jump in and train if there are animals, and if not—”

  “Piper,” Haley said, flinching when Piper stared at her, unblinking. “The fact that I might go back to working on movies doesn’t really change anything between us.”

  “Of course it does! Your big thing was staying away from Hollywood. But once you’re back in—”

  “No,” she interrupted. “My big thing was trying to protect myself from being used as a pawn. But Spike showed me I don’t have a hell of a lot of control over that. No matter where I work, people on the top can push me around. What I’ve finally learned is that much of this is under my control. I simply have to be less trusting, less willing to let people use me.”

  “Are you saying you think I’d use you?”

  “Not intentionally,” she said quietly, turning her head so she didn’t have to linger on the pain that flashed across Piper’s face. “The difference between the haves and the have nots is pretty stark on a movie set. You’ll be on one plain, and I’ll be on a much, much lower one. Actually, since I plan on trying to be independent, we’d never be on the same movies at all.”

  “But you don’t have to be independent!”

  “Piper,” she soothed, her hands shaking from the anguish that surged through her. “You’ll always be with the talent, and I’ll be with the crew, which is where I feel like I fit. That’s a barrier that’s almost impossible to breach.”

  “But you can be with us! Charlie could hire you as her personal assistant. She’s at the point where she truly needs one.”

  “That’s not what I want to do,” she said, making sure her voice was as firm as her resolve. “I have skills I want to use. The very last thing I want is to depend on staying in Charlie’s good graces to keep a job. If you and I broke up…”

  “We won’t!”

  “Piper,” she said gently. “I care for you. I really do. But getting together again isn’t the right move for us now.” She stopped walking and put her hands on her shoulders, giving her a gentle squeeze. “You owe it to yourself to see if this is the right career for you. I refuse to force you to go back to something you’d find routine. You’d blame me for that. Justifiably!”

  “But if we both work in the business…”

  “It’s hard for people to stay together when they’re in different trades. Your schedules never sync up. I just don’t think it could work.”

  She blinked those pretty blue eyes slowly, pain infusing her features. “You’re not telling the truth,” she finally got out. “You’re saying you don’t want to, not that it couldn’t work.”

  “Not now,” Haley said, her resolve wavering dangerously. “You need to devote some time to learning your new job. And I need to see if I can make a go of this.”

  “We could commit to each other while we’re apart…”

  “Focus on your new job,” Haley said. “Let’s enjoy our friendship for now.” She put her arms around Piper’s waist and gave her a long, emotion-filled hug, feeling tears wet her face when Piper’s body started to shake. “I truly care for you,” Haley whispered. “We just can’t be together at this point.”

  “We can,” Piper said, lifting her head to wipe at her eyes. “You don’t want to be.”

  “That’s not…” She sighed as a helicopter’s whoop, whoop, whoop made the air quake. “There must have been a change in schedule. We’d better go see what’s up. We’ll have to talk later.”

  Piper shook her head, before turning to walk away. She was a few yards down the beach when her quavering voice called out, “What’s the damn point?”

  ***

  Tim was full of ideas, intent on moving the schedule around to capture footage of Haley’s lesser-trained birds. As she stood in the hot sun, keeping her focus on her charges, she realized he was trying to wrap things up—for her. The suits might have lectured him about the budget, or maybe this had always been his plan, but her time was clearly running out.

  It had been a couple of hours, but she still felt sick to her stomach. Hurting someone you’d come to love was incredibly hard. So much harder than she could have guessed. But pushing someone you loved into giving up her childhood fantasy was worse. She was sure of that, and equally sure Piper would resent her over time. The hard part, possibly the impossible part, was convincing Piper she wasn’t calling things off. She just wanted a time-out. Maybe a long time out…

  Her head snapped up when someone yelled, “You’re losing a bird!”

  Racing over to the runaway, she shooed him back to the flock, embarrassed to have lost focus. Despite the maelstrom of emotions choking her brain, she had to concentrate. The birds couldn’t wrangle themselves.

  ***

  Piper was nowhere to be found, despite Haley’s dogged efforts. When it finally became clear that she was intentionally hiding, Haley found Zandra and Delta, knowing Piper would eventually claim the little guy.

  It took until seven o’clock, with Piper lethargically entering the dining hall, her gaze traveling over the crowd until it landed on the table where Haley and Zandra were sitting with a couple of guys from the sound crew. Without taking a step toward them, she turned and walked right back out.

  Haley had been holding the dog, and she passed him over to Zandra. “I think you’re probably leaving soon,” she said
, then jumped up and raced from the room, finding Piper getting into a Jeep.

  “Wait!” Haley called, running to catch her.

  Piper turned the key and was about to put the Jeep into gear when Haley reached her. “Please, Piper. Talk to me.”

  She was wearing dark sunglasses, keeping her eyes well hidden. But her head turned to face Haley. “Did I misunderstand you this morning?”

  “About…?”

  “I heard you say you didn’t want to get back together. You rambled on with some bullshit reasons, but the gist of it was that you don’t want to.”

  “That’s not fair! I’ve—”

  “Am I wrong?” Piper interrupted.

  “Yes! I do want to. But I don’t think it’s smart. At least not now. But that doesn’t mean that—”

  “Yes, it does,” she said, yanking on the gearshift. “I’ve got all the friends I need.” The wheels kicked up a fine spray of sand as she peeled out, with Haley staring after her, stunned and hurt so badly she felt like she was bleeding. But she wasn’t. Her injuries were completely internal. She suffered from an invisible, but very painful, heartbreak.

  ***

  On Sunday morning, Haley sat on her yoga mat, watching the sun rise above the navy blue Pacific. It was still early, still very peaceful. Picking up her phone, she called home, smiling when her mother answered.

  “How’s my sweet girl?”

  “I’m okay. Just finished some yoga, the sun’s rising, and I’ve got an hour before my call.”

  “That sounds like a good day. But you don’t sound particularly happy about it. Anything I should know about?”

  “Mmm, I wish you couldn’t read me so well, but I guess it’s better than the alternative.” She sighed, wishing things were easier to explain. “I think I might get hired for the independent film I told you about. The one they’re filming on location in Sicily.”

  “That should make you happy, honey. Why doesn’t it?”