“You don’t know anything about me,” I whispered fiercely. “Nothing. So don’t pretend you do.”
“Sure,” he nodded.
Switching gears again, I ran my hand through my hair. “When they leave for their honeymoon, I’m planning on us having a real party.”
“Whoa, Dad explicitly said no parties.”
“Come on, Carter, we’re only kids once. Let’s throw a great party. You can’t say no. I’m already telling people.”
“God dammit,” he groaned.
“It will be fun! You could use some fun.” Sliding off the bed, I stretched. “Well I’m off to bed. If you’re good, I’ll give you a ride in the car tomorrow.”
“Go to hell!” he yelled as I closed his door with a giggle. My smile fell as I went to my bedroom and closed the door. I should’ve been happy. I was sixteen, I had a car, and I was the most popular girl in my class. I had it all, but I was miserable. My father hated me. Carter hated me. My mother had no clue how to reach me or love me. She was getting remarried and trying to be happy. I was alone, floating in a sea of debris, being pulled one way then another. I needed someone to love me. If even for a little while.
***
My mother was marrying Charlie. Their wedding would happen in the backyard among our friends and barbeque. It was so tacky and white bread-like. I really wasn’t enthused. However, I was pleased that I was able to pick out a new dress. The cornflower blue strapless number looked pretty on me. I looked like a sweet teenage girl. Shame I really wasn’t.
Carter left his room and slammed the door. I wanted to talk with him about us walking down the aisle. I didn’t want things to be weird for us. “Carter, wait!” I called, and he didn’t turn as he hustled down the stairs. “Carter!” I called again, running after him.
“What!” he snapped, turning on the bottom step.
I couldn’t stop my downward sprint and I bumped into him and we fell to the floor. His arms instinctively came around me and his face was buried in my chest.
“Ow,” he mumbled, “My head hurts.”
“Let me up, Carter,” I hissed, struggling slightly. When did he get so damn strong, and why do I like being in his arms so much?
“Hmm?” he murmured.
Finally, I pulled away from him and frowned as I straightened my bodice. “You did that on purpose!”
“No, I didn’t expect you to be racing down the stairs after me.” He sat up slowly, rubbing his head. “Shit, it hurts.”
He’d gone pale and tiny beads of sweat popped up on his brow. “Are you okay?” I knelt beside him and touched his cheek. “You fell pretty hard.”
“But I made sure you were okay,” he garbled.
My heart thumped painfully. Dammit, Carter…“You always have.” I stood and offered my hand. “Come on, baby brother, let’s get some peas on your head.”
He took my hand and I hauled him to standing before pushing him into the kitchen. He slumped into a kitchen chair and winced as I slapped a cold bag of peas on the back of his head. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered, and I pursed my lips.
“Get it together, Carter.”
“No, I mean it.”
“And I mean you need to get it together. You can’t do this.”
“Sure I can. You’re beautiful, Brielle, I don’t care what anyone else says,” he slurred.
“Christ, maybe you should go to the hospital…” I probed the back of his head and he groaned and buried his head into my boobs again.
Backing up slightly, I shook his shoulder. “Don’t go to sleep, do you hear me?”
His eyes opened a fraction of an inch and a ghost of a smile touched his lips. “Sleep sounds good,” he whispered, snaking his arms around my waist and pulling me closer. “C’mere and lay with me. You’re so beautiful, Brielle…”
“Carter, you have to wake up. You can’t go to sleep! Mooooom!” I yelled, panic kicking in. I knew you couldn’t go to sleep after hitting your head.
Mom came running in and her eyebrows shot up to her hairline. “What the hell is going on here?”
“He fell down the stairs and I brought him to the kitchen to put some ice on his head, and he’s trying to sleep. I think he really is hurt.”
“Shit,” she groaned, running to the back door. “Charlie!” she shrieked. “Carter’s hurt.”
Charlie darted inside and his eyes widened as he saw Carter’s face buried in my boobs. “Um, well, alright then. What happened?”
I reiterated the story. “He fell down the stairs, I brought him in here to put ice on his head and he fell asleep.”
“Let’s get him to the ER.” Charlie stepped closer and managed to get Carter’s arms from around my waist. I moved out of the way while he cradled him in his arms and hurried out to his truck. “Keep an eye on my meat, Lisa, I’ll call you!”
Mom sighed and closed the door behind him. “Want to help your old mom get ready for her wedding day?” she asked hopefully.
Nodding, I smiled. “I’d like that.”
She seemed surprised as she led the way upstairs. Have I really been that much of a bitch?
***
“I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss your bride.” I wanted to cry as they kissed. I’d never have something like that. Mom and Charlie really loved each other. They were happy. I should’ve been thrilled for them. But all I could think about was how the boy I loved desperately was my stepbrother, and it was wrong to want him in the way I did.
He disappeared from the white lawn chair he’d been inhabiting and I saw his light go on in his room. The damn idiot had a concussion. I felt bad because I’d been the one to fall on him, but he never said anything to me or blamed me.
I tried to enjoy the party, the food was nice and it was great to see everyone, but I just wanted to be alone. Stepping away from the party, I pulled my phone from my pocket. “Peter?” I sighed. “Feel like getting together tonight?”
“Sure, baby,” he murmured in my ear. “Where am I meeting you?”
“Wicker Lane. I can’t stay out long but I need some kegs and some pills. Can you help me?”
“Always, beautiful. See you in half an hour.”
Staying in the shadows of the bushes, I slipped around the party and inside the house, where I grabbed my car keys. Kicking off my fancy sandals, I pulled on sneakers and darted out the front door to my car. Starting the engine, I backed out of the drive and took off before anyone could catch me.
Rolling the windows down on the car, I let the muggy air pour in around me. Within minutes, I was pulling up to our little secluded spot on Wicker Lane. Cops often used the small cubby to hide in for speeding tickets, but tonight only Peter’s car was there. I could make him out by the glowing ember of his cigarette while he inhaled.
“Hey, babe,” he called as I killed the engine.
“Hey,” I sighed. “So did you get what I wanted?”
“Two kegs and quite a few of your favorite little pills. Now what have you got for me?”
“Anything you want…”
“Great. I’ve got a couple of guys I’d like you to meet. Jamie? Kellan? Meet Brielle. She’s great.”
Two hulking guys came to my side and I gulped. “Hi, guys.”
“Let’s go have some fun.” Peter chuckled and my stomach filled with dread.
“Sure.”
I was in too deep and I didn’t know how to get out. Kind of like quicksand. It all seemed completely harmless at first, but it wasn’t. The more I struggled, the deeper I fell. Eventually, it consumed me and I was swept away in the tide. I drowned.
I won’t go into details about that night, but the next morning I took a scalding shower before waking up Carter. Mom and Charlie were long gone when I got home at four in the morning. It was just the two of us.
Slicking my hair back into a ponytail, I tiptoed into his room. God, he looked so cute sprawled out on the twin-sized bed. He was almost too tall for it and one of his legs hung out from under his blue sheet. I tick
led the bottom of his foot with my fingernails. He kicked at me and I giggled. “Wakey wakey!”
He rolled over and groaned, “What?”
My eyes widened at his junk. “Whoa, you have serious morning wood,” I snickered, pointing at his protruding pajama bottoms.
“Why are you in here?” he grumbled, grabbing a pillow and shoving it over his dick.
“We need to get ready for the party,” I sighed.
“I am not going to your party. I’ll stay here in my room, thanks.”
“No way! You have to help me! I got a couple of kegs.”
“How did you get kegs?”
“I had a couple of college boys buy them for me. I just had to persuade them.” I grinned and tried to pretend it didn’t bother me the things I’d done for the beer.
He grimaced. “Really?”
“It’s no big deal, really. I don’t mind.” Lies, every word. I hated what I’d done but hey, every girl did that stuff…right?
“You’re better than that, Bri,” he grumbled.
No, I’m not your Bri. “Why didn’t you call me Brielle?”
“I don’t know.”
“Almost everyone else in the world calls me Bri but you. You call me Brielle. Don’t call me Bri.” I’m not your Bri. I’m your Brielle. Don’t forget that. Because if you start calling me Bri too, there’ll be no one left knowing who I used to be. “Come on, Carter. We need to get the house ready. Hide the valuables.”
“I want to sleep.” He rolled over and pretended to snore.
Stroking his arm, I whispered, “Please…for me?”
“Fine. Give me a little bit to wake up,” he groaned.
I laughed. “You mean jerk off. Okay. Have fun!” Leaving his room, I closed the door and went to work. The house had to be readied for an epic party.
He came downstairs half an hour later and I jumped on him, looping my long arms around his neck. “Can I use your stereo?” Batting my lashes prettily, I pouted and waited for him to answer.
“No.” He extracted my arms and moved away.
“Why not?” I asked.
“Your music sucks.”
“But your stereo’s the best. Please?”
“Ah hell. Okay, fine. I’ll bring it down in a little while.”
“You’re the best! I have almost everything locked up and hidden so we should be good to go.”
“I can’t believe we’re having a party.”
“We are! A great one!”
The party was amazing. I got ready with my girls upstairs, changing into a skimpy little red dress I’d stolen from the hottest store in the mall, and sky high heels. We all popped an E to make the party even better. Music oozed from his stereo and everyone danced. I sipped at the lukewarm, disgusting beer and sang along to my favorite CD. Setting my beer down on the coffee table, I grabbed Britney’s hand and we dirty danced. As the song ended I turned back to my drink and chugged it down.
That was the last thing I remembered until the next morning when I woke up in Carter’s arms. It was pretty easy for me to piece together what had happened, and I was mortified. My inner thighs ached, and I felt woozy and half asleep. I struggled to figure everything out. I’d been dancing with Britney, then I drank my beer…
Shit, I got roofied.
Looking up at Carter, I found his hazel eyes on me and I smiled softly. “You saved me.”
He struggled to sit up. “Are you okay?”
Gripping his shirt, I held him in place. “Carter, thank you.” I shifted up his body and pressed my mouth against his. It felt like coming home. Just that fast, bile skittered up my throat and I pushed off him, leaning over the edge of the bed to puke.
Dozing off again, I vaguely remembered him carrying me to bed and talking sweetly to me as he peeled off my hooker dress and slipped an oversized band T-shirt over my head. He never tried anything. No, Carter Travis wasn’t the type. He was the best type of man and I didn’t deserve to even breathe the same air as him.
Curling up on my pillows, I slept for a few more hours, until I felt my mother’s hand on my cheek. “Bri, baby? Are you okay?”
Shit...what am I gonna tell her? Blurting out the first thing I could think of, I rasped, “Food poisoning. Bad Chinese.”
“Oh honey, that’s terrible. Let me go get you some ginger ale and crackers, okay?”
“I just want to sleep,” I whispered.
She kissed my forehead and brushed my hair back. “Okay, baby.”
I hoped my lies protected us. I really did. I didn’t want Carter to take the fall for my stupidity.
Chapter Seven
Tenth grade year was miserable for me. I hadn’t been accepted to the cheer squad, and I was furious over it. Apparently, the clout Leslie had before she graduated was gone and now all the new seniors didn’t like me. Therefore, no cheerleading for me. I was also miserable because Carter was snuggling up to a foreign exchange student named Carla.
Maybe I’d been a fool, but I thought after the kiss we shared, he would’ve known how I felt. But no, he was just a stupid boy. A stupid boy that I loved. Carla was ridiculously beautiful, and I hated her gorgeous, perfect, Brazilian guts. Watching them coo over each other in the lunchroom made me sick.
“Stop staring at him, Bri,” Jennifer grimaced. “It’s pathetic.”
“Fuck you,” I growled back. “You don’t get it.”
“You love him, it’s cool, whatever. Incest-y, but whatever.” Britney sighed, tossing her hair over her shoulder.
“Shut up before I shove your teeth down your throat,” I snapped and her eyes went wide.
“Sorry, fine, whatever. Love him if you want to. But for Christ’s sakes, either screw him or don’t. This back and forth drama is exhausting.”
Narrowing my eyes, I focused back in on the bubbly and bold Carla. I knew exactly what I’d do. Carter laughed at something she said and even from across the cafeteria, I saw a look in his eyes that hurt. He liked her, a lot. He’d never looked at me like that.
I had to nip this budding romance in the bud. Sooner, rather than later. My opportunity came a few days later in gym. Carla dressed in her regular clothes after her shower, and I pounced while she pulled her shirt on.
“Do you like my brother?” I blurted, and she froze, her shirt halfway on.
Pulling it the rest of the way down, she nodded. “Yes, I like Carter.”
I sighed. “See, you can’t really like him.”
Her eyes widened and she frowned. “Why not? Carter’s a nice boy.”
Propping my hand on my hip, I whispered, “He likes boys.”
“Carter? Likes boys?” she gasped, her mouth falling open in shock. “But he’s so nice.”
“He is, and he’s super gay.” Nodding sadly, I touched her arm like we were best friends and I genuinely cared. Inside I rejoiced. I was breaking up Carla and Carter. There would be no dating her now.
By the end of the day it was all over the school that Carter was a man lover. Riding on cloud nine I bounced out of school with Britney and Jennifer at my side. Suddenly, I felt a hand on my arm and I whirled around to see a very angry Carter.
“Carter!” Gasping, my face paled slightly.
“Why did you tell Carla I was…gay?” He growled softly.
“Me?” I choked out. “No way.”
“Liar.” He shook me and my neck bounced back and forth. “You’re a liar.”
Narrowing my eyes, I hissed between gritted teeth, “And you’re hurting me, so I suggest you take your hands off me before I tell my mom everything. It’s obvious I’m real good at telling a story and having people believe me. Do you want to cross me?”
Releasing me, he spat, “Whatever. At least I’m not a slut.”
“Aww, that’s soooo original. Like I haven’t been called that before.” Shrugging, I turned away and linked arms with my best friends. “Find your own way home, homo!” Screw you, asshole. You know nothing about me and why I am the way I am.
The whole way home
I steamed. Dropping the girls off, I drove home alone and sulked in the driveway before crawling out of the car and storming in the house. Mom caught me as I walked inside. “Bri, baby? Can we talk?”
“Sure.” I sighed, hanging my backpack up and kicking off my shoes. “What?”
“Come sit down.” She caught my elbow and steered me into the kitchen. Pushing me into a chair, she sat down across from me and smiled tightly. “How was school?”
“What is this?” Sighing in irritation, I stood to leave. “I’ve got things to do.”
“Bri, wait. I need to talk to you about something. Charlie and I are trying for a baby. Will you be okay with that?”
My knees went weak and I collapsed back into the chair. “A baby?”
“Right. It would be more siblings to love. Your dad’s wife is going to have another baby soon…”
“When have I even seen the first one? He got her knocked up and forgot all about me. I’m never allowed over, he never calls me, he never wants me around the brat. I barely know her name, Kayleigh, and we’re supposed to be sisters. So is that what you and Charlie have planned too? Get knocked up, have a brat or two and then forget all about me? Well here, let me make it easy for you. You don’t have to be my mom anymore. Not that you were a great one anyway. So have all the babies you want. I don’t care.” Tears pricked my eyes and I jumped up from the chair and ran to the front door. Pulling on my shoes, I grabbed my keys and threw the door wide.
Running to the car, I opened the door and slid behind the wheel. Mom rushed down the stairs, her blue eyes wet with tears. “Bri! Wait! Let’s talk about this.”
Starting the car, I threw it into reverse and backed down the driveway. I could barely see through my tears as I drove aimlessly. Mom wanted a baby. She would forget all about me too. First my father, now her. Carter hated me. Everyone hated me. I hated me. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I called Peter.
“Hey, baby, I was beginning to think you forgot my number.” It had been months since the party and the guys he’d made me pay for the kegs.
“I need…” I sniffled, unable to say what I wanted. I needed someone to make me forget, and Peter was good at that.
Good Stepbrother (Love #2) Page 6
