Persona

by Amy Lunderman

  Looking up, Liam can see Moira sit up at the back of the truck, in the rearview mirror. He finds it stunning how quickly she healed the night before, and she looks completely normal now. Aside from the way her apple spice flows off of her in waves of course.

  She must be worried about something, because usually she can reign in her persona, which is something she seems to be struggling with right now. Before she can change and cause himself to follow right behind her, Liam thinks now is a good time to visit the people whose driveway they are in.

  “Be right back, I’m going to see if anyone is awake yet. Yawl stay here, yeah?”

  Liam doesn’t wait for a response though. He quickly reaches for the door and pushes it open, all the while holding his breath.

  ***

  Moira watches as Liam leaves the truck and wonders what him problem is, not that she should really care. He did make her lose any respect she might have gotten for him. She can’t ignore the way he makes her feel though. Even out of the truck now, she can still pick up on his cinnamon scent. It fills her senses, and makes her forget that she is mad at him. This of course makes her persona hum just under the surface of her skin, but he isn’t really the cause of her persona waking up. No, that credit belongs to Fletcher and how he was haunting her in her sleep just now.

  She can’t remember the dream exactly, but she does remember the way she felt; terrified. As soon as she woke up, she didn’t even remember where she was at first, and still thought she was at the facility. It is a relief to know that there is an entire state between her and Fletcher now. Which is the only reason she is able to control her persona, and it tampers down instead of surfacing. The humming of her skin disappears and she sighs in relief. No one else in the truck seem to notice that she was close to changing, buy then again, they probably wouldn’t consider it a problem like her. That is something she doesn’t know if she can stop from feeling. That it is wrong, to use her Persona so openly.

  Maybe there will be something good on this trip, besides getting somewhere safe. Maybe she’ll finally be able to use her persona without feeling like she is doing something wrong. This thought stirs something hidden deep inside her, and she wonders if she’ll actually be able to let go of things she held tightly for so long.

  Rubbing at the faded red marks on her wrists, Moira doesn’t really know what to believe in anymore. Should she really change her way of thinking, when things are already so messed up? Saving this theorizing session for another day, she takes in the others in the truck with her.

  All of them awake it seems, Moira watches as Ray and Daisy cuddle up together even though they try to play it cool. Yeah right she thinks to herself, none of us notice. Raven and Marty are bickering over something involving a bro-mance? Moira wonders what they were all doing when she was still asleep.

  Marty notices her then, and they’re eyes meet. When he smiles at her right away, and it’s his familiar smirking grin, she feels all bad thoughts fading away. Marty has always seemed to have this effect on her, and it makes her feel less alone, knowing he is here with them. Raven is saying something to him, but he doesn’t reply as he is too busy watching her. So much so, that Raven turns in her seat and glance’s Moira’s way with a knowing smirk on her face. This makes Moira blush for reasons she is not sure of, and she has to look away from him.

  Looking out the window now, she sees that Liam is at the front door of the house they are parked at. He is only just lowering his hand from knocking, when the door is pulled open. An older dark haired man in a bathrobe is standing in the entrance holding onto the door. He starts talking right away and gestures a lot with his hands. When he grins and nods in the direction of the truck, Moira lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. For some reason she can’t explain, she had the feeling that no one would really be willing to help them. She is glad to be wrong.

  Liam turns to them then, and waves them to come over. When the man goes inside, Liam turns back around and follows him after him. Moira glances away then, and realizes that the others have been talking, while she was in her own world.

  “What do you think they’ll be like, them in the house?” Ray asks, as he sits up and watches Liam enter the house.

  Moira admits she wonders the same thing. Will they be different from people like them, that she has met? Or will they just be regular people that have similar abilities as them? She is certainly curious to see how the other half lives, so freely in their home.

  “I’m sure they’ll be normal enough, Ray, hard not to be living in a housing development like this.” Daisy answers him sweetly.

  “As long as they let us take a shower and get cleaned up, I don’t really care what they are like.” Raven interjects.

  Listening to them, Moira finds that she is still a little removed from their closeness. She supposes that has something to do with the fact that she feels so lost, as of late. She makes a note to herself that she’ll try to more involved, even if she doesn’t really know how.

  “I don’t know about you guys, but I could go for some grub rather than a shower.” Marty says as he opens his door and hops out.

  Moira watches as the others follow suit and joke about Marty and how maybe he should reconsider showering instead of eating. This earns a hard smack to Ray’s head from Marty. They are laughing though, and Moira is filled with a peace she hasn’t felt since first moving back to New York so long ago.

  Marty comes to her door, and by the time he opens and holds it for her, she realizes she should have gotten out already. Blushing, she quickly climbs out of the truck and ducks her face behind a curtain of her hair strawberry blonde hair as she does. As soon as she is standing and Marty is closing the door, she is about to start for the house with the others. Marty stops her with a light touch to her elbow though, making her turn to him.

  “How you holding up there partner?” Marty asks her softly, so the others don’t hear.

  For the first time in a while, Moira really looks at Marty. Through this whole ordeal of things that drive her crazy, he has been there for her. Honestly, she doesn’t know where she would be without him. He is her rock. Her dark hair and eyes rock, that resembles a mildly upbeat goth. Somehow he pulls it off though, and in a strange way, it looks great on him. Not that she thinks anything of the like for him, she reminds herself.

  “I’m holding, a little creaky, but still holding.” She tells him with a small smile.

  “That’s my girl. Come on old creaky. Let’s get inside before Raven embarrasses herself by rushing to a shower without asking.”

  Moira lets Marty lead her after the others who are already halfway inside the front door. Even though she feels slightly less alarmed when she woke up a little while ago, she still has one thing on her mind. And that is to get to the bottom of this pack stuff. She might even have to get over her anger towards Liam, to ask him about it. Maybe, but she won’t push it.

  ***

  Following Dave Stevens into his house, Liam is relieved that the man remembers him enough to actually help them out. He makes a note to thank his parents for being so nosy in everything everyone does. Walking behind him and into the man’s kitchen, Liam wonders if his wife still looks like he remembered her from years ago. He knows Dave does, even with the subtle changes. He is still a large man even with old age slimming him out, and his dark hair is now salt and peppered with grey. He still holds himself high and erect, like he doesn’t let anything get to him. Then again, Liam thinks, he probably doesn’t.

  Reaching the kitchen entrance around the corner, Liam’s senses are affronted with the strong welcoming aroma of coffee. He perks up when they come around the corner and he sees that Dave’s wife Pam is sitting at her island counter with steaming mugs of coffee. She stands and smiles when she sees him, and he offers her one of his own as well. Just like her husband, she hasn’t really changed over the years. Still rail thin, and waves of auburn hair cascading down her closed bathrobe. She too has grey streaks in her hair, but Liam believes the
y could actually be white if he isn’t mistaken. Her age shows more than Dave’s, but it doesn’t take away from her bright spirit and he freely welcomes a hug when she approaches him for one.

  They embrace, and with her arms around him, he is reminded that the last time anyone held him like this was when he was a small boy. It makes him miss being a boy, getting hugs without other intent. When Pam pulls away, she offers him another bright smile.

  “How are you my boy, it’s been to long indeed?”

  Liam steps back and accepts a cup of coffee from Dave who is now sitting at the island.

  “Honestly Mam, I’ve had better days.”

  Pam places a gentle hand on his cheek and gives him a motherly sincere look.

  “Oh darling, I can only imagine. I spoke with your mother last night, and she informed us of things. Even under the circumstances it is good to see you well.”

  Liam nods at her with another honest smile, while she sits beside her husband and drinks from her own coffee cup. This makes Liam sip from his own cup, and feels instantly refreshed from the first drop on his tongue. Lowering the cup from his lips, he looks up to see Dave watching him, oddly.

  “I’m afraid I couldn’t come through as fast as I promised your mother. I won’t be able to get the passports you need until this afternoon.”

  Now Liam understands the look Dave was giving him, it was a nervous one. He sees Liam as a step in for his father. Meaning that they see his father as a sort of boss, in a way he kind of is, Liam thinks. He just finds it funny when he is reminded of that fact. He is about to tell the Stevens that it’s not a problem to wait for the passports, when he hears the others come into the house and make their way into the kitchen with them. He can feel Moira as soon as she enters the threshold of the house, and the scent of apples races before her and fills him up.

  No sooner are they all in the entryway, is Raven already gushing about getting a shower. She gets a smack from Daisy and a glare from Ray; Marty is just smirking and shaking his head. Moira isn’t paying them any attention, her eyes are just for him, and he tries not to let it get to him. It takes everything in him to not let the scent of apples overpower his strength and bring on his persona. From the way she looks slightly pinched like she ate something sour, Liam thinks she is feeling the same way.

  Before he can apologize for his rude ingrate friends, whom he is glaring at, Pam rushes over to them.

  “Oh you poor dears. You can all help yourself to anything you need. Let me show you to our spare room, so you can get cleaned up.”

  Smiling she walks out of the room and the others flock right after her, each nodding their hello’s to Dave. The man addresses them with a wary grin, before giving Liam a stern look when they have all gone.

  “You need to be careful son, these are dangerous times. It’s only a matter of time before you come to the wrong folks for help.”

  Liam lowers his eyes and stares at his half empty coffee mug, and tries to think about how he even got himself into this situation. Then he remembers, it’s about a girl, isn’t it always?

  “I know that Sir, thank you for your concern.”

  “I just know what it was like after your father escaped seventeen years ago, and it wasn’t pretty boy. Keep in mind, those men have better resources now.”

  Liam doesn’t say anything, and continues to stare down his coffee. He knows Dave is just trying to offer him guidance in the form of a warning, and it definitely sends chills down his spine. However, he has too much confidence in what he does, to let it get to him. His family has been on the outskirts of the ‘law’ for years now, and he knows how to get around them.

  Dave mistakes Liam’s silence as ignorance of the situation, and tries to convince his still of the reality of things. Or so Liam believes.

  “The girl, the pretty little thing with the red hair, is she really worth all of this son?”

  Liam’s head shoots up and his eyes bore into Dave, and for just a moment he can feel his persona rising in him like a wave, and wanting to crash to the surface. He clamps it down at the last second though, and only his eyes change making his vision clearer. Dave scoots back slightly, as if he is uncertain of Liam’s reaction. As he should be, Liam thinks, how dare he say that about her.

  This makes Liam remember seeing her for the first time so long ago, and how she instantly disliked him and how she got under his skin the first time he saw her smile. He clenches his fists at thinking back to seeing her strapped to the gurney at the facility. All covered in blood, and frightened that he was the bad guy and not there to help her.

  Eyes still boring into Dave, Liam leans in so he is closer to the man. Feeling reserved, he knows he has to make him understand where he stands on this situation, and on her.

  “Yes, yes she is.”

  With wide eyes on him, Liam sits back and sips from his cooling cup of coffee, all the while hearing the others moving around the house now.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Sitting on the edge of a twin bed, in a spare room Moira watches Daisy and Raven who have no problem conversing with Pam. She would be a little jealous, if she wasn’t so out of it these days. She used to be the girl who wasn’t afraid to talk to new people, until she moved back to New York in September. Now she doesn’t know who or what she is anymore. Watching them though, it doesn’t really matter if she joins in or not. Raven and Daisy seem to be doing all right on their own.

  The Stevens had two spare rooms, and made one up for the girls and the boys. Apparently they have grown children, because Pam offered they’re old clothes for them all to change into. Much to Marty and Rays delight, the Stevens had both a daughter and a son, or they’d be wearing a skirt. This makes Moira chuckle a little bit. Who wouldn’t, thinking about seeing Marty in a skirt? Raven of course could barely keep herself in check. All the while she was talking with Pam, and as soon as the woman was finished, Raven states she gets a shower first. Laughing, Pam leaves the girls to help themselves to the adjoining bath connected off of the room. She tells them she better scurry off to give clothes to the boys, in case they try to reuse the ones that already have.

  Raven rushes into the bathroom without saying a word as soon as the woman is gone. Leaving Moira alone in the room with Daisy, and she wouldn’t mind usually, but the other girl comes to sit by her on the bed looking solemn. Moira can feel her breath quickening, and knows that any moment Daisy is going to ask she is alright. And when she doesn’t, Moira has the sinking feeling she is going to break. Since leaving the farm the night before, she has been feeling somewhat empty, but she knows it’s just a farce. All she needs is an opening, and she knows the tidal waves will pour out of her again. Even if she would probably feel better to let them out, she can’t right now. They still have a ways to go, and she needs her strength. Whatever amount of it she has anyway.

  Except Daisy doesn’t ask if she is alright, in fact she doesn’t say anything for the longest time. The girls sit in a comfortable silence now, and Moira is grateful for it. By the time Daisy does break the silence, Raven’s shower is just about finished.

  “I used to be normal you know. I wasn’t always like the rest of you. My ex-boyfriend last year infected me, and made me what I am.”

  Moira whips her head around to face Daisy, who is just starring off into space down at the carpeted floor. Taking a deep breath, Daisy looks back to Moira and looks so sad, that she just wants to take the other girl in her arms.

  “I’m only telling you this, because I know what it’s like to have something weighing on your shoulders. Like you can’t really express how you really feel without losing control.”

  Nodding, Moira doesn’t even know what to say. She can only think that this is what was just running through her mind a moment ago. She is about to tell Daisy this, when the other girl continues first.

  “I also know how it feels to want to keep it all locked inside, but eventually you’ll have to let it out. When you do, just know you can come to me.”

  Letting a
half smile form on her lips, Moira is still speechless and doesn’t know what to say to that. All she can do is pull Daisy to her in a tight hug and tell her thank you. The other girl nods against her shoulder and for the first time, Moira really has close friends that care. At this moment Raven comes into the room in a waft of steam, wrapped up from head to toe in puffy white towels. The two girls pull apart, and have to squint in the steam filled room now. They find Raven with her arms crossed and glaring at them.

  “Oh yeah sure, wait until I’m in the shower to have a heart to heart. I could have joined in on it you know.”

  This makes the girls laugh, and Daisy just stands up shaking her head. She lightly touches Raven’s shoulder as she skirts past her into the still steaming bathroom and closes the door behind her.

  Raven uncrosses her arms, and gives Moira a softer look, one that makes her afraid again what the other girl will say to her.

  “I am a good shoulder to unload on you know. Daisy isn’t the only sweetheart that can listen. So you know, whenever you need to talk, I’m here too.”

  Moira nods at Raven, and almost like it sets her free, the other girl rushes over to the clothing box that Pam left for them over by the door. Moira watches her dig through it and wonders again how she got such great friends. They have given up so much for her, and who knows what else is coming their way. The only thing she knows for sure is that she is going to make it up to them no matter what. No matter what Fletcher has behind his back for a plan for her, she won’t let it bring any harm to her friends.

  Even if it kills her in the process.

  Raven stops digging through the box suddenly and holds up a thick fabric to Moira. She has a cheeky grin on her face, and is wiggling her eyebrows. Moira inspects the garment and is trying to figure out what is so funny about it, and then she sees what it is. It’s a large old fashioned sweatshirt, with a smiling cat on the front with a giant bow in its fur. It’s hanging upside down on a tree branch, and the inscription on it says ‘Hang on it’s almost Friday.’