Mollie McQueen is NOT Getting Divorced

by Lacey London

  ‘I’m genuinely interested.’ Mollie persisted. ‘Please tell me why you perceive me to be cold.’

  ‘Mollie, you’re an ice queen!’ He laughed, closing the fridge and reaching for the pizza menu. ‘You come home after spending twelve damn hours in the office only to criticise the second you walk through the door. There’s no hi. There’s no how has your day been? Just complaints and disapproval.’

  ‘I don’t ask how your day has been, Max, because I know exactly how it has been.’ Mollie fired back. ‘You stay in bed until noon, play on the PlayStation, eat some cereal, make notes about yet another stupid invention and then you go back to the PlayStation. Correct me if I am wrong?’

  ‘You’re wrong.’ He said calmly. ‘You only see that because that’s what you want to see. You don’t see four hours after waking of internet research. You don’t see cheap cereal for breakfast because I’m aware you’re the breadwinner right now. You don’t see team bonding sessions on the PlayStation with my web designer.’ Reaching for the phone, Max opened the takeout menu. ‘Point of view is a remarkable thing, Mollie, but I digress, we weren’t talking about me. We were talking about how cold you are.’

  ‘Of course we were.’ Mollie replied, tapping her pen on the table angrily. ‘So, please enlighten me as to how you came to that conclusion, because I think you will find I’m the only person in this marriage who attempts any kind of romance or physical contact.’

  ‘Physical contact?’ He repeated. ‘You think ignoring me all night, belittling my business ideas and ridiculing my beliefs is the best way to get me into bed?’

  ‘Since when did you need romancing into bed?’

  ‘There’s a difference between romancing and having sex with someone who makes you feel two feet tall, Mollie.’ He protested. ‘This might come as a surprise to you, but being ridiculed isn’t exactly a turn on.’

  ‘You’re six-foot-two! How could I possibly make you feel small?’

  ‘That brings me to the next point on the list.’ Max said coolly. ‘Sarcasm.’

  ‘Sarcasm?’

  ‘We all love a joke, Mollie. A bit of harmless banter is fine, but sometimes, you take it too far.’

  ‘You’re such a drama queen.’ She responded. ‘Sarcasm, really? That’s the best you can come up with?’

  ‘There’s a whole lot more on that form. I’d be happy to go over them with you.’ He offered, punching the takeout number into the phone. ‘Being so closed-minded, I can see why you might need a few of those points explaining…’

  Just as she was about to retaliate, Mollie had a change of heart and calmly closed her questionnaire.

  ‘Let’s save this conversation for tomorrow’s therapy session, shall we?’ She mumbled, giving Max her best pretend smile. ‘Like Evangelina said, we shouldn’t be conferring.’

  Turning her back to him, Mollie closed her eyes and slowly counted to ten. It had been a long time since she had engaged in a meaningful conversation with Max, and if tonight was anything to go by, it was going to be even longer before they had another…

  Chapter 15

  ‘Interesting.’ Evangelina said slowly, attempting to pull her frozen brow into a frown. ‘Very interesting…’

  Waiting for the verdict, Mollie picked at her red nail polish and studied Evangelina’s face for a clue as to the outcome. With ninety-eight pages to look through, it was no surprise Max and Mollie had been sitting in complete silence for quite some time now. Had they passed? Had they failed? Did their answers indicate they were destined to be alone forever, or worse, with each other?

  ‘You think you are… manipulative and controlling, Mollie?’ Evangelina asked, squinting at Max’s messy handwriting on Mollie’s papers. ‘In what way, exactly?’

  Shooting Max a glare, Mollie tucked her hair behind her ears and cleared her throat.

  ‘Max wrote that.’ She explained irritably. ‘He filled in my faults and I filled in his.’

  ‘Did you normally have a problem with following simple instructions?’ Evangelina asked, making a note on her computer.

  Mollie pouted and looked down at the ground. As much as she wanted to believe in Evangelina’s abilities, her strict approach was starting to grate on her.

  Clearly recognising Mollie’s annoyance, Evangelina placed a perfectly manicured hand on Mollie’s arm.

  ‘Please don’t take that as an accusation.’ She said comfortingly. ‘My research has shown that people who struggle to follow basic instructions in their daily life generally fail to follow the rules of a relationship.’

  ‘Since when did a relationship have rules?’ Max asked, sharing a confused look with Mollie. ‘Relationships shouldn’t have rules...’

  ‘You don’t believe there should be rules in a relationship?’ Evangelina replied quickly, cutting him off mid-sentence.

  ‘No, I don’t.’

  ‘For once, I agree with Max.’ Mollie chipped in. ‘Relationships should be based on love and commitment. Not rules and regulations.’

  Nodding slowly, Evangelina widened her green eyes.

  ‘Just to be clear, neither of you believe there should be rules in a relationship?’

  Max and Mollie shook their heads as Evangelina inhaled sharply.

  ‘Okay. I think I am beginning to see where your problems begin.’ She said, clasping her hands together. ‘A lasting relationship is formed on a solid foundation of fundamental core rules. The word rules probably generates an image of inflexibility, regimentation and control. I want you to remove that preconception from your minds right now. The rules of a relationship are mouldable, free-flowing and enable you to set your own standards as to what is and is not acceptable…’

  Trying to keep up with Evangelina’s explanation, Mollie leaned forwards in her seat and listened intently.

  ‘If both parties in the relationship are committed to following the rules set by yourselves in this meeting room, you will have a solid base to build a happy and lasting marriage.’ Pressing a large button on her keyboard, Evangelina walked over to the printer. ‘Every relationship is different, and as such, every set of rules is unique. You will decide your own rules, I will simply compose the contract…’

  ‘Contract?’ Mollie repeated, frowning as Evangelina returned to her desk with a freshly printed set of paperwork. ‘Does it have to be so official? We already signed a contract when we got married.’

  ‘Do you have a fear of commitment, Mollie?’ Evangelina asked, shuffling the papers in front of her.

  ‘No. Not at all.’

  Evangelina smiled and gave Mollie a quick once-over.

  ‘You don’t have to sign anything you don’t want to. I am simply going through the stages of the course in which you are enrolled.’ She said calmly. ‘Overthinking is one of the main causes of unhappiness in our society. If you feel you are falling victim to it, I have another course that I can recommend…’

  ‘I think the one course is enough, thank you very much.’ Mollie replied curtly, silently wishing the session would soon be over. ‘So, where do we start with these rules?’

  ‘You tell me.’ Evangelina responded, seemingly oblivious to Mollie’s growing frustration. ‘These are your rules for your marriage.’

  ‘I have one.’ Max said, suddenly finding his voice. ‘Can we make it a rule that Mollie has to greet me when she comes home from work? A simple hello before she disappears into the shower would be nice.’

  ‘Do you think that’s a fair request, Mollie?’ Evangelina asked.

  Mollie nodded, hoping that if she just agreed to everything she would be out of there sooner.

  ‘While we’re talking about greetings, could you put down that she also has to at least say good morning to me before diving out of bed?’ Max added.

  ‘Why is that an issue when we don’t even sleep in the same bed?’ Mollie grumbled under her breath.

  ‘You’re no longer sharing a bed?’

  ‘We haven’t for the past few nights.’ Max admitted. ‘Her decision, no
t mine.’

  ‘Intimacy with one another is so important if you are going to turn this around.’ Evangelina warned gently. ‘Just to clarify, I’m not talking about sex. Simply being in each other’s personal space is a must if you are going to break down the walls you have built up.’

  Mollie let out a scoff and shook her head. She was only going along with the counselling to appease Max, but Evangelina had another thing coming if she thought Mollie was letting him back into her bed.

  ‘I sense some hesitation, Mollie.’ Evangelina said, resting her hands palm down on the desk.

  ‘Oh, I’m not hesitant.’ Mollie replied confidently. ‘Hesitant would imply that I’m uncertain. I am one hundred percent positive that he is not sleeping in my bed.’

  ‘It is my bed too, you know.’ Max retorted.

  Holding up her hand to stop him, Evangelina fixed her concentration on Mollie.

  ‘How would you feel about a camp bed in the bedroom?’ She asked. ‘It’s not ideal, but it would be a stepping stone to getting you back to sharing your personal space.’

  ‘This is getting ridiculous.’ Mollie complained. ‘What happened to the core rules? How did we get on to sleeping arrangements?’

  ‘Diversion is a perfectly normal part of therapy. If we stumble across an area of your relationship that requires immediate attention, we will abandon what we are dealing with and dedicate our time to the more serious matter.’

  ‘Fine.’ Mollie took a deep breath and tapped her foot impatiently. ‘He can sleep on a damn camp bed.’

  Evangelina gave Mollie a tiny smile in response before looking down at the papers in front of her.

  ‘So, we have had two rules from Max. Do you care to add any, Mollie?’

  ‘Hmm, where should I start?’ Mollie mused dramatically. ‘He could put his dirty plates in the dishwasher rather than leaving them to gather mould in the sink? He could help with the laundry instead of waiting until he runs out of underpants before attempting to use the washing machine? Oh, and perhaps he could open the window after he has used the bathroom from time to time…’

  ‘Mollie, could I just stop you there?’ Evangelina interrupted. ‘I think you have missed the objective of the core rules. The core rules are to ensure both parties respect and honour one another. They are not to dictate chores.’

  Mollie glared at Evangelina and resisted the urge to flounce out of the meeting room.

  ‘Let me offer some examples of rules most commonly selected by my clients.’ Repeatedly clicking her mouse, Evangelina tilted her computer screen to face Max and Mollie. ‘Eat breakfast together at least twice a week. Ask how one another’s day went. Take an active interest in your partner’s hobbies. Respect each other’s privacy.’

  ‘Those will do.’ Mollie snapped. ‘Okay. I think we’re done here.’

  Standing up, Mollie turned to leave and stopped when Max tugged on her sleeve.

  ‘You can leave any time you wish.’ Evangelina said quietly. ‘But if you want to fix your marriage, I strongly advise you to stay until the end of your session.’

  The truth is, Mollie didn’t know what she wanted anymore. She had a ray of hope Evangelina could fix their relationship, but now, therapy was succeeding only in annoying her. It was aggravating her more than discovering Max’s toenails in the bed, and that was quite an achievement in itself.

  Slowly retreating to her seat, Mollie bit her tongue and waited for Evangelina to speak once more.

  ‘How does your social circle perceive the state of your marriage to be?’ Evangelina asked, as though the last thirty seconds hadn’t happened.

  ‘My parents were shocked, to say the least.’ Max replied. ‘My mum took it worse than my dad, but I expected as much.’

  ‘We will address family in a moment. For now, I would like you to think purely about your friends. I want you to focus on the people you have platonic relationships with outside of your marriage.’

  ‘Mollie doesn’t have any friends.’ Max said frankly.

  ‘Of course I do!’

  ‘Who?’

  ‘Well, I have…’ As Mollie racked her brains for the names of her closest friends, she quickly came to the realisation that Max was right. ‘I suppose I have pushed my friends away lately, but that’s only because I have been so busy with my work.’

  ‘You have been busy with your work for years!’ Max argued. ‘Payne and Carter has become more important to you than anything or anyone else. I’m surprised you have time to eat.’

  ‘Are you calling me fat?’ Mollie growled, shooting him daggers. ‘Because that would be almost impossible with all the rabbit food you make me eat.’

  ‘What about you, Max?’ Evangelina said tactfully, jumping into the conversation before he could respond to Mollie’s snipe. ‘How do your friends view your relationship with Mollie?’

  Max frowned and looked up at the ceiling.

  ‘We don’t really talk about it.’ He confessed. ‘I prefer to keep my relationship private.’

  ‘Please!’ Mollie cried. ‘You don’t talk about it because the only friendships you have are on your PlayStation.’

  ‘On your… PlayStation?’ Evangelina repeated sceptically.

  ‘I generally talk to my friends via video games. They’re real people. We just choose to meet up virtually rather than in person.’ Max explained. ‘Hey, it’s the twenty-first century! There’s nothing wrong with that, right?’

  Without responding, Evangelina quietly closed her folder and placed her pen on top of it.

  ‘Here’s what we’re going to do.’ She began, brushing a stray strand of hair out of her face. ‘Your task this evening is to take yourselves on a date. I want you to think of your ideal first date and go on it. Alone.’

  ‘May I ask why?’ Mollie asked, frowning in confusion.

  ‘In order to be truly happy, you must learn to love yourself.’ Evangelina said evenly. ‘Self-love is an art very few of us really master, but once you do, it is an enlightening experience. Do you really know who you are? Chances are, you don’t.’

  Starting to believe there might just be a sprinkle of method to this madness, Mollie listened carefully.

  ‘On your date, I want you to make notes on how you feel. I want you to think about which aspects of your own company you enjoy and which parts you don’t. I’d also like you to spend a little time considering how your date would differ if your partner was with you. The more thoughts you take away from the experience, the more substance we will have to work with in order to decide which direction we go in next.’

  The mystery of the unknown spiked Mollie’s interest as she offered Evangelina a tiny smile in agreement.

  ‘I am going to send you away with a set of core rules which we shall finalise shortly, but the main objective I want you to take from this meeting is your date tonight. Have fun, relax, and most importantly, enjoy yourselves.’ Evangelina instructed, her eyes sparkling as she spoke. ‘You can have all the fun in the world by yourself. It just takes a bit of imagination to discover it…’

  Chapter 16

  Adding a slick of scarlet to her lips, Mollie stared at her reflection and breathed in deeply. For the first time in over ten years, she was going on a first date. Unlike all the dates she had been taken on before, Mollie McQueen was going to ensure this one was completely perfect. There would be no walking on eggshells, there would be no awkward silences, and there would be categorically no enforced vegetarian food.

  ‘Was there any mail today?’ Dropping the camp bed next to the wardrobe, Max collapsed onto it in a heap.

  ‘I don’t think so.’ Mollie replied, applying yet more blush to her rosy cheeks.

  Frowning in response, Max took a rubber band out of his pocket and slipped it onto his wrist.

  ‘Where are you going again?’ He asked.

  ‘I’m taking myself for cocktails followed by dinner in town.’ She said happily. ‘If the mood takes me, I may watch a silent movie at the independent picture house.’

/>   ‘Nice.’ He mumbled, struggling to repair a broken spring on the camp bed. ‘Where are you going for dinner?’

  Mollie paused with her hairbrush in her hand and debated telling a lie.

  ‘The Brazilian steakhouse on Lowton Street.’ She said cautiously, reaching for her perfume.

  ‘Steak!’ Max exclaimed in horror. ‘Are you intentionally trying to wind me up?’

  ‘This is my date, Max.’ She said casually, allowing herself a final look in the mirror before heading to the wardrobe. ‘I don’t need your approval, thank you very much.’

  ‘Good, because you won’t get it.’ He growled, stretching out on the camp bed. ‘A silent movie? That’s really the best you could come up with?’

  ‘I happen to love silent movies.’ Stepping into a red skater dress, Mollie used a coat hanger to pull up the zip. ‘But I wouldn’t expect you to know that.’

  ‘When have you ever mentioned silent movies to me, Mollie?’ He asked. ‘In all the years we have been together, we haven’t once watched a silent bloody movie.’

  ‘And what does that tell you?’ She snapped, stepping into her heels.

  ‘That you obviously have a dreadful taste in movies?’

  Choosing to ignore him, Mollie walked around the camp bed and started to fill her handbag with all the essentials.

  ‘Aren’t you going to take a shower?’ She asked, looking at the clock and wondering when he was planning on getting dressed. ‘I don’t know where you’re going, but you can’t go looking like that.’

  ‘Unlike your date, Mollie, mine is all about comfort and relaxation.’ He said confidently. ‘None of this plastering yourself in make-up and wearing shoes that are going to cut your ankles in two minutes.’

  ‘For your information, Max, I don’t dress up for you, or for anyone else. I do this for me.’

  ‘If you say so.’

  Quickly fastening her earrings, Mollie finished her look with a leather jacket.

  ‘So, come on then.’ She sighed. ‘Enlighten me as to what your dream date entails…’