Insight

by Jennis Slaughter

  “Who’s Raelin? And who was that good-looking woman I saw earlier? I’d like to ask her out sometime,” he straightened up his clothes and smoothed back his hair.

  Del turned slowly from the door to give her father a hard look. “Raelin was the woman having lunch with me when my Deputy dragged you in. She’s my wife, so you can just stop that line of thinking right there.”

  “Ooo, good taste. Sure you don’t wanna share...?”

  Del felt her temper quickly reaching its breaking point and knew she had to get out of that room before she did something to get herself thrown in jail. “Fuck you Dad.” With that, she snatched open the door and left, slamming it behind her. She stalked out to the Jeep and just sat in the driver’s seat, trying to get her anger down to a manageable level. She knew her father was still a little drunk and that it was pretty clear the booze left in him that was talking, but that didn’t make things much better. It seemed like it was always the whiskey talking with her father. She took a few long deep breaths, pushing everything down so that she could safely drive back to the house, determined to keep the promise she’d made to herself to never bring anything from work back home with her. Finally, a little more under control she started the Jeep and headed back to the house.

  j

  By the time Del had arrived back at the house, Kasey and Jenny had already arrived. The house of course smelled wonderful and Del smiled when she saw the large pan of homemade shepherd’s pie warming in the oven. She let the warmth of her home, and what she considered her family, soothe her ragged nerves and settled down a bit to enjoy her time with them. She’d apologized for being late and was grateful that Raelin hadn’t pressed her on anything. They’d finally sat down to eat once Del had changed and settled into the house.

  “So Jenny, Kasey tells us you been slaving away on that piano of yours all weekend. Whatever you’re cooking, must be pretty good,” Del mentioned, sprinkling pepper over her meal.

  “I hope so. This melody has been running through my head for over a month and I’m trying to get it out before it drives me insane. Kasey has been great,” answered the auburn haired woman, reached out to grasp her lover’s hand. “She’s woken up in the middle of the night and found me at the piano, working on it.”

  Del actually laughed at that. “Yeah, well just make sure you get some sleep every now and then yeah? And try not to wear out my Deputy; someone needs to keep me in line. I expect to hear this masterpiece once it’s done.” She took a bite of the beef and moaned at the taste, “Rae, this is really good.”

  “Glad that you like it Darlin’, I remembered that it’s one of you favorites and I added mushrooms that I found at the grocery store. They’ve upgraded the entire store now. It’s almost like a gourmet shop. This town is really looking up.” Raelin grinned, knowing that she had a little bit to do with the improvement.

  “Yeah, there’s been a lot of growth, especially this last month. Everyone is really impressed with how you’ve turned this place around.” Kasey smiled; she’d heard a lot of great things from the townies about how Raelin was becoming a presence in the community.

  “Yeah, and the Mayor certainly likes letting us know.” Del chuckled. “I appreciate dinner. It was a long day and this is about the best ending to a hectic day anyone could ask for.”

  Leaning over so that she could whisper in her wife’s ear, Raelin breathed, “It’s not over yet Darlin’.”

  Del felt those words roll through her and settle low in her stomach. She’d heard the promise in those words and she looked forward to whatever Raelin had up her sleeve. “That’s good for me then,” she gave Raelin a quick kiss before she pulled back and turned her attention back to her meal and her friends. “So, how are your students making out anyways Jenny? I hear some of them show some promise.”

  A pounding on the front door interrupting whatever the younger woman was going to say. “Delaney... Let me in... I want to talk with you,” Duke’s voice came through the open windows.

  Del froze at the sound, looking down at the table. Silently she rose from her place and headed to front door, her anger once again starting to bubble. She pulled open the door and stepped onto the porch, her arms crossed over her chest. “What are you doing here? How did you find this place?”

  “I asked the desk clerk at the Inn... Aren’t you gonna invite me in?” The older man weaved slightly on the front porch.

  “Are you drunk again? Did you actually drive all the way out here, drunk?” she asked angrily. “And no, I’m not going to invite you in. Whatever you need to say you can say it here.”

  “I had a little one on my way out here, just to calm me down,” he wiped his hands on his pants. “I wanted to apologize about the quip about your wife. That was out of line, and I’m sorry.”

  “You’re damn right it’s out of line,” she snapped. She had no idea what she was supposed to do with him now. She really didn’t want to have to arrest him for drinking and driving and if she wanted to get him back to town, she’d need to take him herself. “I can’t believe you would drive out here while you’ve been drinking. Where did you get the liquor, the pub is under strict orders not to serve you anymore. Do you realize that I’m the Chief around here? I should be arresting you for drunk driving.”

  “I found a bottle in my car, and you do what you need to do, but I’m gonna say what I came here to say. I want to go into rehab and I don’t have the money. I’m asking you for your help,” he stood there with his hands hanging limply by his sides and stared at the floor.

  Raelin got up from the table and walked over to stand beside her wife. “Mr. Delacroix, won’t you come in?” She held out her hand to lead him over to a chair in the living room. Turning to Jenny, she asked her to make a pot of coffee.

  Del remained a few extra minutes on the porch, trying to calm the emotions raging through her. When she felt a little more under control, she joined her wife and father in the living room, keeping her distance from the man by standing next to the couch, arms still crossed defensively.

  “I don’t know what you want me to say to that. I’m glad you want help, but why now? You’ve been drinking since mom died and all of a sudden now you decide that maybe you have a problem? This is how it always goes with you. Any time I ever finished a job and had a little bit of money, it was always the same thing, and then you would never actually get help. What makes this any different than every other time you’ve guilted me into helping you?” she asked quietly.

  “The Doctors says that I have around six months. I’ve drank myself to death and I want to have a relationship with you before I go. I know that your momma would have been a great parent and the Fiona did a damn good job and it’s because of her you came out the way that you are, not because of me.” He looked at his daughter, realizing how much time he had lost because of his own fault.

  “After all these years, you show up on my doorstep to tell me you’re dying and that you’re just now deciding that having a relationship with your daughter might be a good idea?” Del asked her voice trembling. “You just expect six months to make up for the fact that I’ve lived every day of my life feeling like it’s my fault you’re like this, that I’m the reason Mom died, and that you’ve always resented me for that. That you drank because you couldn’t deal with me. What do you expect me to do with that?” She hated that this was happening in front of Raelin. Jenny had showed up long enough to deposit a pot of coffee and some cups on the coffee table before retreating to join Kasey elsewhere.

  “Well, it was your fault that she died. If you hadn’t been breach, she would have lived through the childbirth. She was the light of my life, and because of you, she was gone.” He glared up at his daughter.

  “No, you do not get to talk to Delaney like that. It’s not her fault that happened. It was a natural occurrence,” Raelin snapped at the man.

  Del reared back as if she’d been slapped. “So that’s how you really feel. Well, I guess at least now I know,” she felt the tears stinging he
r eyelids, but refused to let them fall instead she pretended to act as if she didn’t care. “Guess it should have been clear all along though huh. You do what you want; I’ll make sure you at least get out of town without getting arrested. After that, I can’t make any promises for other cops.”

  She turned and retreated up the stairs, unable to stay in the room any longer. She closed the door to their bedroom behind her, stripping down and starting a hot shower. She sank to the bottom of the tub, wrapping her arms around her knees and only then did she let herself cry.

  “I’ll show him out if you want Rae,” Kasey said from the entrance to the living room, anger clearly written over her features.

  Raelin stared at the man sitting in her living room. This was her wife’s father, but it was obvious that neither one had any love for the other, and she could understand Delaney’s point of view. “Take him back to town and throw him in the drunk tank. Charge him with whatever you need to. Del wouldn’t want you to cut him any slack because of who he is. In the morning, escort him to the county line and make sure that he understands that he’s not welcome back.”

  “No wait, please. I’m sorry; I say things I don’t mean. It’s the drink; it’s why I want help. I get flustered and angry so I lash out, usually at her. I need her to know that I’m proud of what she’s accomplished I really am. I just need help to be okay enough to try and make things up to her,” he pleaded.

  Raelin spun around and glared at the man. “You need to understand that I will not allow you to talk to my wife in that fashion. What happened was awful, and there was nothing that Delaney had to do with it. If you want to blame someone, blame yourself and her mother. You shouldn’t have been in love or made a commitment to love and cherish before God,” the witch knew that she was being harsh, but she didn’t care.

  “Please, I know it’s not her fault. Every day she gets so more and more like her mother. I miss her, I miss them both. I know I’ve been a terrible father, but I’m begging you, please,” he pleaded again, slipping off his chair to rest on his knees. “She’s all I have left,” he whispered, knowing that once again his inability to keep dry had probably cost him what small chance he might have had with his daughter.

  Raelin stared at the man for a long moment before she turned to Kasey. “Take him to the drunk tank. Let him sleep it off. I’ll call and get him into rehab at that place outside of New Orleans. I’ll have someone come down and get him tomorrow,” turning back to the older man, she warned him. “If this is a scam, I promise that you’ll regret it. You complete the rehab, and I promise that I’ll try to get Del to at least sit down and talk with you.”

  “Thank you. Thank you so much. I can’t tell you what that means to me. I won’t let you down I promise,” he rambled as Kasey hauled him out the door to her truck. She popped her head back into the house and called to Jenny that she’d be back to pick her up once everything had been taken care of at the department and then she was gone.

  “You okay?” Jenny asked Raelin as she picked up the unused coffee and dishes.

  Raelin sank down onto the sofa, and held her head in her hands. “I don’t know Jenny. Delaney never talked about her father and I understand why now. There’s a lot of hate in that relationship and I don’t know if there is enough time for them to figure things out.”

  “Well, at the very least you’re giving them the opportunity to try. Where did Del go anyway?” she asked, kneeling next to her friend.

  Raelin nodded her head towards the upstairs. “I think that she’s taking a bath. Would you mind cleaning up and you’re welcome to stay if you want,” she reached out for the phone, intending to call the rehab facility to arrange for them to come pick up Mr. Delacroix.

  “Kasey’s going to be coming to get me once she’s done. I already cleaned the kitchen up while you were talking with her father. You do what you need to do. I’m going to go plunk on your piano if that’s alright,” Jenny replied standing and picking up the coffee tray once again.

  “Plunk away.” Raelin smiled and made her phone call. After promising a donation to the center, she arranged for someone to come the next day and to drive Mr. Delacroix to the facility. Putting down the phone, she sat there for a moment, sending a quick prayer to her Goddess that Delaney wouldn’t be too upset with her interfering.

  j

  Del continued to sit in the tub, unable to pull up the energy to move. The water had long since turned cold, but she took relief in the stinging as it hit her skin. Her eyes had dried up but the pain in her chest remained and the headache that always came with a good cry pounded behind her eyes. She’d always known that her Father had never seen anything but his lost wife when he looked at her and she’d thought she’d come to terms with it years ago. Hearing it out of his mouth first hand was a little different and although she’d told herself she no longer needed his approval, it still hurt like all hell to hear him say it.

  “It’s not your fault Delaney,” Raelin said for the doorway.

  Del didn’t move make any move to get up, but she did nod her head. “I know,” she answered quietly.

  Raelin reached in and turned off the water before she knelt beside the tub. “I had Kasey take him to the drunk tank and made arrangements for him to go into rehab tomorrow. I hope that’s okay with you.”

  “That was nice of you. I’m sorry you had to go to all that trouble.”

  Reaching in, Raelin gently turned Del’s face so that she was looking at her. “It was no trouble Darlin’. How about you getting out and coming to bed? I want to snuggle for a while.”

  “Okay, can you hand me a towel?” she asked, rising from her place and wincing when the blood rushed back to her toes.

  Standing to snag a towel from the rack, Raelin wrapped it around her wife and began to dry her off. “You didn’t get any ice cream. Would you care of a bowl before you go to bed? I’ll bring up one if you want.”

  Del debated a moment. “Yeah sure. I’ll take a small bowl. You didn’t get one either. Wanna share?”

  “Chocolate syrup or caramel sauce?” Raelin asked with a smile, remembering back to their first dinner together.

  Del’s lips twitched into an almost smile. “Both please.”

  “Thought you might say that. I’ll be right back,” she went downstairs, fixed them a bowl and by the time she came back up, she found Del sitting cross-legged in their bed. “Here you go Darlin’. Enjoy while I get changed for bed.”

  Del nibbled quietly at her ice cream, taking her time licking it off the spoon. Raelin’s homemade ice cream had quickly become her favorite treat and it was always better with extra sauce. She watched as Raelin came out of the bathroom, stripping off her clothes and pulling on an oversized oxford. “Bite?” she asked; holding out the spoon as Raelin approached.

  “Of the ice cream or you?” was Raelin’s sultry response.

  Giving Raelin a weak smile, Del offered the spoon one more time. “I was thinking the ice cream.”

  “It was my second choice, but I understand,” she leaned forward to take the spoon in her mouth.

  “Any other day it would be mine too.” Del half smiled, taking a spoonful and then offering another bite to her witch. “How was your afternoon?” she asked quietly.

  Lying on her side next to her wife, Raelin propped her head up on her fist. “Quiet for a change and it’s probably one of the last quiet ones that I’m going to have for a while. Do you want to talk about it?”

  “I’m fine,” Del answered, doing her best to sound okay. Raelin certainly had enough on her plate already. “I guess they probably will keep you pretty busy. Plus running the bookstore and tea room,” Del answered, nibbling thoughtfully on her spoon.

  Reaching out to draw her wife’s gaze to her, she gently said, “Talk to me Darlin’. You are my first priority in life. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

  “I don’t know what I’m thinking. What am I supposed to think? I always knew he hated me for killing mom, but he’s never actually said it unti
l now,” Del replied, setting the now empty bowl aside, stretching out, and copying Raelin’s position.

  Sighing, Raelin looked down at the sheet, tracing idle designs. “I don’t think that he hates you Del. I think that he just didn’t know how to handle the loss and he took it out on you.”

  “You know it really doesn’t matter either way. I miss my grandmother. He didn’t start getting that bad until the accident. It left me in a coma you know. For two weeks,” Del said softly, watching Raelin’s fingers tracing abstract patterns.

  “Maybe he didn’t know how to raise you, maybe losing his mother was the last straw so to speak.” Raelin didn’t know what to say. She wanted to have the answers for her wife, wanted to wrap her in her arms and tell her that everything was going to be alright, and she couldn’t.

  “He tried to have my life support cut off, twice. The doctors told me that he came in drinking and upset because he didn’t have the money to keep me hooked up like that,” she whispered.

  Shaking her head, Raelin reached out and drew the blonde into her embrace, kissing her face and running her hands over her back. “No more... Don’t think about it anymore. Just lie here with me, remember how happy you were with your grandmother, and know that your mother wanted you more than anything. You were and are loved Delaney.”

  Clutching Raelin’s shirt in her hands, she pressed deeper into her wife’s arms, struggling to hold back the sobs she could feel threatening to break loose. She took several deep breaths, trying to calm down enough to catch her breath as tears burned at her eyelids. “Thank you, for being here,” she murmured brokenly, her face pressed tightly to Raelin’s shoulder.