The Horseman's Heritage

by Jacki Bentley

  "Sorry, Mandy. I'll remember you don't like to be called small. I meant it as an endearment."

  "'Dearment?"

  "That means fondness, that he likes you,” Ashley said.

  "Yes,” Reese agreed.

  "That might be okay then.” She smiled the prettiest smile, one that reminded him of her mom and caused him to smile back through the mirror.

  "It's okay. You didn't mean to ‘fend me."

  He laughed. “No, I'd never want to do that."

  Ashley looked at him as if to say, what would you have done alone?

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  Chapter Eleven

  The sun sparkled and a warm breeze bounced early fallen leaves across the zoo's paved walkways. There'd been only a light frost, but some of the trees were already tinged with orange. Most all the zoo animals seemed to be outside frolicking in their rustic habitats, enjoying the pleasant fall weather. Ashley had no regrets over the missed opportunity to rest as she took in the surroundings with as much enthusiasm as her small daughter. She could sleep anytime. A trip to the zoo with Mandy and Reese would be a precious memory to take out and relish on a cold winter's night long after he'd left her again.

  Mandy rode in regal form atop Reese's broad shoulders, looking like a small princess on her throne. Ashley smiled at the thought. From the elevated position Mandy had a wonderful view into the animal's artfully camouflaged cages. Their generous areas of confinement had been constructed to hide the fact that the inhabitants were no longer free to roam the ranges of their native places.

  As Ashley led them past the elephants toward the North American exhibit, Mandy asked, “Did you know that the Asian elephant can be trained, but the African elephant can't be?"

  Her daughter was a natural educator. She loved to share the information she gleaned about the world around her, and never tired of questions and answers.

  Reese and Ashley exchanged a knowing grin.

  "I did not know that,” Reese offered. “I know some things about cows and horses, but my elephant education is a little short."

  His obvious interest encouraged Mandy to share the other little tidbits she knew about the elephants. Her discourse lasted until they crossed a wooden footbridge which led the way to Ashley's favorite exhibit.

  The North American animals were less exotic than their international counterparts in the other sections of the zoo, but no less fascinating. She and Mandy could stay here for hours on end and they often did.

  "Mountain lion,” Reese said.

  The sleek, well-fed beauty of the mountain lion was just as enthralling as the haunting fragility of the cheetah.

  Walking through a small clearing in the trees, they watched otters play in a brook.

  "He's playing peep-eye,” Mandy said, giggling.

  "That's what it looks like.” Reese laughed at the apt description of the activity of the otter. Its head darted up and down from behind a large rock that bordered its pool, small eyes flashing playfully. Water beads rolled over its sleek, brown fur.

  Under the trees, wildflower gardens were winding down for the season. Most of their beauty was spent now, but they were still handsome with their large brown seed pods. Ashley remembered the flurry of color they had been in the spring and early summer.

  "Do you two come here often?” he asked.

  "Yes, we love it here."

  "Yeah, we do,” Mandy agreed.

  This time was sweeter because Reese was with them. She glanced toward him. And darn the man, he was enjoying himself, too. All the times like this that he could have shared with them came rushing to her mind. If he'd wanted a child. So many lost hours and days. She was suddenly angry about that. Very angry.

  He raised a brow. “What's wrong? You looked happy a moment ago."

  Mandy wiggled to be free. “Let me down, please."

  Once she was down, she dashed along the path ahead of them.

  Looking directly into his eyes, Ashley struggled with the anger and frustration she felt toward the man beside her. For a penny, she'd tell him it was his fault. Every miserable moment they hadn't been a family was his doing. With a struggle, she held her tongue. She'd promised him a truce.

  "Oh, nothing is wrong really,” she replied, closing her eyes she let the warm sun that had just broken through an opening in the treed canopy warm her face. Forcing the sad, angry feelings to the dark corner of her mind that housed them, she began to walk forward again.

  His expression was confused, but he followed her lead without pressing the matter.

  Ashley realized she was very lucky she and Reese had somehow made it through the test of learning she had a daughter with a reprieve. For the moment, she wouldn't spoil it with accusations.

  Her growing worries about sabotage at work seemed far away, as well.

  For now.

  * * * *

  For a day that started out with a surprise trip to hell, this wasn't so bad, Reese thought. The little munchkin knew the zoo well enough to be a paid tour guide. Right now, she was nodding off to sleep mid hotdog.

  Her mother—amazing that his Ashley was a mother—scooped away the child's teetering apple cider just before it met with disaster.

  They all three sat on a bench now. Mandy was tired and fighting rest with every molecule of her young body—as only a child could. The little one had run out of energy and needed to recharge her batteries. She'd been talking nonstop about the eating habits of bears, their sleeping habits, their territorial range. Mandy was a miniature scientist like her mom.

  "The little one is already following your footsteps, I see."

  "You noticed, hmm? Mandy soaks up all data available to her and feels compelled to share it with others."

  Reese nodded. “Just like her mother."

  "Hey,” she protested.

  "When we were together, I became accustomed to hearing treatises on the natural world around us, from global warming to the latest important archeological find.” There'd never been a need to comment much, just a word here and there to keep the beautiful tones of the female voice going.

  He watched as Ashley blushed and looked away. “Don't get me started on global warming."

  He grinned.

  "Did I bore you?” she asked.

  "You know better.” It hurt him to look at her, hurt more not to look at her. “I enjoyed your enthusiasm for science. I worried you'd think I was too dumb for you with only a bachelor's degree in agribusiness when you have a couple of PhDs"

  "Never,” she assured him, shaking her head firmly.

  "I'm glad.” God, he'd missed this woman. His heart lurched. It might be too late for them to repair the damage of the past. The little one's daddy might still be around, biding his time. Damned if he'd ask right now. He couldn't spoil this day, so he held his tongue.

  "Mandy carries a lot of her mother in that tiny package."

  "Do you think so?"

  "Her smile. Something in the way she walks. Light and elegant.” He kept it to himself, but there was still something about that blond hair that nagged his memory, like a name on the tip of the tongue. Not a reminder of Ashley, but someone else. Ashley's sister, maybe. No. He'd only met Emily once four years ago, but he was sure she didn't have blond hair. The memory was too weak and cloudy to call to mind. Maybe it would come to him later.

  Mandy stirred, as if her little body clock woke her up. “Let's go see the Grizzly bears, Mister Reese,” Mandy said, hopping up and tugging at his hand.

  "Sure,” he answered, laughing. “But you've got to think of something else to call me besides Mister Reese. Sounds like a good name for a British butler.” He'd suggest she call him plain Reese, even though a part of him cried out that she could have been his child. If he hadn't been such a coward, she would be. He was about to speak when the little girl beat him to it.

  "I might let you be my new daddy. We can pretend you are until you marry my mommy."

  "Amanda,” Ashley said, blushing like crazy.

 
Reese laughed.

  Mandy went on before her mother could speak, “But Aunt Emily says Mommy's not too good at cooking or cleaning."

  He threw back his head and laughed again. “Oh, she said that, did she?"

  "Yeah, but Mommy's nice. And very pretty. Isn't she?"

  "Yes, she's pretty, alright.” Reese winked at a shocked Ashley. “And nice.” Ash stopped cold in the middle of discarding their leftovers.

  "I've asked your mommy to marry me more times than I can count, Mandy girl. Maybe you can help me talk her into it?” He wasn't too proud to use a child in this battle of wills with Ash, in spite of his nagging conscience.

  Ashley glared at him. “Asked? Hah. More like demanded,” she came close and hissed under her breath.

  "Gosh, you have? Really?” Mandy chirped. “You mean you wouldn't mind to be my ... our ... new daddy?” At the last minute, she generously included her mother in the deal she was making.

  "It would be an honor, ma'am. But we have to let your mom help us with a decision this important. Can't push her."

  Ashley snorted as if he'd pushed her plenty before. He had, he supposed. But he'd changed. Some. “Let's let her think about it a while, okay?” he said this with a teasing smile directed at the little girl. She gave a squeal of delight and ran onward toward the Grizzly bear enclosure.

  Uh oh. Ashley had her hands on her hips now. “Reese, what the heck are you up to? I thought you didn't like children?” Ashley's voice was indignant, angry as if she felt cheated.

  "Honey, I told you this morning, I've never, not once, said I didn't like children.” He grasped her shoulders, turning her to face him.

  "Yes you...” she began, but he interrupted.

  "No. I never said I didn't like children."

  The expression in her green eyes became bewildered.

  "I've always liked them, as a matter of fact,” he said.

  He should tell her about losing Gabe, about knowing the loss was coming and trying hard, yet failing to stop the inevitable.

  He looked toward the little girl, who'd just noticed the grown-ups lagged behind her.

  "Come on,” she urged them, waving a beckoning hand.

  "I do like kids very much,” he said, solemnly.

  Ashley gave him a sharp smack to his shoulder with the back of her hand. He grabbed his arm.

  "But you can't possibly like children,” she argued, her voice sharp.

  "Owww. That hurt.” He rubbed his arm.

  Ashley paused to catch her breath and to let the pounding of her blood slow some. She felt tears forming and burning behind her eyes.

  Reese stared at her as if in shock. The man looked as if he'd been kicked in the stomach rather than a harmless little hit on the arm.

  Had it all been some stupid, stupid, avoidable misunderstanding? She could not bear that.

  "You just have to stop saying you like children. You said,” she deepened her voice to mock masculine tones, “'I won't have children with you, honey'."

  "Ash...."

  Steadying her breathing, she tried again, “If it isn't that you don't like them, then why? Why didn't you want me to have your children?” she whispered.

  "It wasn't about you. Ashley, it's a long and complicated story.” He raked both hands through his hair. A closed expression covered his face like a dark cloud rolling across the horizon.

  She knew that stonewall all too well. She'd seen it before. Fine. He didn't want to talk about it. Well, he was going to talk about his reasons—eventually. She'd make sure of it.

  "Where is the Grizzly bear exhibit?” His eyes followed Mandy's fast-disappearing little figure. “The little one is almost gone."

  She sighed. For now, she'd give him more time, try to keep to the good faith of their truce. “The bears are just around the corner."

  Ashley watched the escaping blur of her daughter as she cleared that corner up ahead of them, her little legs flying. “We'll catch up with her. Follow me,” Ashley said, jogging ahead. For a moment, Ashley felt a touch of illogical primal fear as her little girl approached the bears. At this distance, she could see the creatures, sitting upright on their haunches, their noses sniffing the air.

  She reminded herself the transparent walls separating the bears from the public were a barrier that assured her daughter's safety.

  Reese took her arm as they went to join Mandy. The masculine warmth of his hand on her bare skin sent darts of sexual awareness through her system.

  "What are your plans?” he asked when they settled on another bench in reach of Mandy and at an angle to the bears.

  Darn him, he was steering the conversation in the direction he wanted it to take, Ashley thought, frustrated.

  She looked over at him and at the same moment saw a wolf across the path beyond his shoulder. The animal broke out of the cover of trees and stared through the chain-link fence at the assorted humans present today.

  She sucked in a breath. The look in the wolf's eyes carried the same cunning speculation as the one in Reese's eyes now. She smiled a small smile at the whimsy of such a thought. Then looked again. What could the man be thinking that brought that look? It made her think Reese also wished for a lack of the barriers of civilization, too. As the wolf did.

  He followed her gaze, watchful.

  "Is he hungry?” she asked, speaking of the wolf, but knowing it was more complicated than that.

  "He doesn't understand the fence and Plexiglas walls. Prevents him from claiming territory he sees out here that could be his."

  "Yes,” she agreed. That was it. That could be what she saw in Reese's eyes. Frustration with barriers. Another territorial male.

  "Isn't he sooo handsome?” Mandy bounced up to them, turning her attention from the bears to the wolf.

  "Yes, he's a very handsome guy,” Reese agreed. He ruffled the little girl's hair and then he looked into Ashley's eyes as though he were offering some challenge, a gauntlet glove thrown. ‘See, I like children?’ his expression said.

  'How was I to know?’ she replied with her eyes and a shrug.

  [Back to Table of Contents]

  Chapter Twelve

  With a groan, Reese sat straight up in his hotel bed. His heart pounded from the dream he'd just had.

  Looking around the room, he remembered where he was. In a rented in a nearby hotel. He wanted Ashley to have some time to get used to the idea of his return.

  The dream had been one of those dreams, the ‘seeing’ dreams. A True Dream. The kind of thing Josie accepted as a gift and he fought like hell to ignore.

  This dream had been more informing than foreboding, thank God. He allowed his mind to recover the bits and pieces. The scene had been of himself as an old guy, fishing by a lake. Laughing and at peace.

  Standing by his side was a beautiful woman—Ashley.

  Another woman was there, too, taller than Ash, younger. She looked deeply familiar with blond hair and brown eyes. Her husband stood by her side, joking with Reese about fishing and sports.

  In his dream, the young woman had called him ‘Dad’ and hugged him. He couldn't make out all her words, but the tone was soft and loving.

  No one in the dream spoke her name. But he knew it was a future version of little Mandy. What the hell did that mean?

  One thing for sure, it was a happier ending than the torturous dreams he'd had the first two years of Gabe's life. From the time of his son's birth, he'd known his son wouldn't be with him when he grew old. The torture of that knowledge had killed him inside. He'd denied it. He'd damned it, but he'd known in his soul, it was the truth.

  He had also known he could do nothing to hold his son in this world, but God, he'd tried. He'd hovered over the child like a mama hen.

  He closed his eyes now in remembered anguish. Even the morning of the accident, he'd gone over the car, checking every maintenance detail. The Peacewatcher gift was not a science or even complete messages. What good did it do him? He couldn't stop the sleeping driver that hit his Natalie's
car.

  He punched the pillow and tried to go back to sleep.

  Slumber was a long time coming.

  * * * *

  The next day, Ashley and Reese sat side-by-side in the new sanctuary of Union Presbyterian Church, where Ashley's family had attended for generations. Her ancestors traced to an original Ohio settler, one of the builders of the church. The old church had seen the days when frontiersmen Simon Kenton traveled the woodlands along the winding Olentangy River.

  There were good people here. She'd always felt it. They'd made her feel at home here, never asking awkward questions about Mandy's absent father.

  Today there were curious glances. As if some of her close friends and neighbors guessed that Reese was the father of her small daughter—perhaps because she'd brought no other man here.

  Her mother had phoned last night and spoke to Mandy for some length of time. The result was a lunch invitation for today after church. Ashley could only guess that Mandy had mentioned Reese and her mother's curiosity had been stirred.

  So after the service, they drove the red car to her mother's home. The little sports car was again too full, with her and Reese in the front bucket seats, and Mandy in the rear seat with her tiny knees rubbing the back of the passenger's front seat.

  Reese drove the car up the curving drive to her parent's home. The large white farmhouse was situated on over a hundred wooded acres that stretched halfway into the Olentangy riverbed along its west boundary. The gardens around the house were looking their fall best. Hosta lilies with solid green leaves and hosta lilies with green and white stripped leaves thrived under the shady trees. Pink and red begonia beds looked lush and lovely. Her mom loved to keep the grounds in top shape.

  "Nice, homey place,” Reese commented.

  Her mom and dad stood waiting for them on the wide, wrap around porch.

  After a swift hug for her granny, Mandy asked, “Can I go play, Mommy?"

  "Sure, sweets, just stay where I can see you."

  After swift hugs for her grandparents, Mandy skipped off to explore the lawn.

  "That's not a family car, young man,” Alice Wilson said, briskly. She softened her words with a welcoming smile.