The Prince's Royal Dilemma

by Brenda Harlen

  He wanted, in a word, Lara.

  Beyond the physical attraction that he’d felt from the beginning, he found that the more time he spent with her the more he genuinely liked her. She was smart and kind with a generous heart and a surprising sense of humor. She made him smile when he hadn’t had anything to smile about in a long time. And she made him wonder—about the taste of her lips, the scent of her skin and the sensation of her naked flesh against his own. Definitely not anything he should be wondering about when he had a country to run and a wedding to plan.

  He stifled a yawn as he started up past the nursery. All he wanted to do now was fall into bed and sleep until morning. A quick glance at his watch warned that morning wasn’t so very far away. Well, a few hours’ sleep would have to do. He’d been existing on no more than that for several weeks now.

  He paused with his foot on the step and strained to listen more closely to the sound that had caught his attention. Was that…singing?

  He turned left instead of right and made his way down the hall. As he did, the sound became more audible.

  He realized that he was hearing the song Alexandria had told him about—the lullaby that Catherine used to sing to her children and that Lara now sang whenever they had bad dreams.

  He paused outside the door of his young nephew’s bedroom and listened as the soft lyrical voice wrapped around him, captivating him like the soft shimmering threads of a magical web.

  The room was lit only by the glow of the half-moon outside the window, but it was enough to illuminate her silhouette as she sat on the edge of the mattress rubbing Damon’s back as the song lulled him back to sleep.

  Something stirred inside him, an unfamiliar feeling that was somehow both gentle and compelling.

  Lara backed toward the door, the words fading to a soft hum as she tiptoed away from the sleeping child. When she stepped over the threshold and turned into him, he reached out automatically to steady her. She gasped softly as his hands settled on her narrow hips.

  Her head tipped back, her eyes widened.

  She tried to draw away, but now that he finally had her in his arms, he found he wasn’t ready to release her so soon.

  He could feel the warmth of her skin through the thin barrier of fabric, and he could all too easily imagine untying the knot and slipping the garment from her shoulders. He wanted to discover what she wore beneath, and then he wanted to strip that away, as well. He wanted to explore the soft feminine curves of her naked body with his hands and his lips and—

  “Your Highness?”

  The question drew his attention back.

  He watched her throat move as she swallowed, then the tip of her tongue came out to moisten her lips.

  There was only so much temptation a man could be expected to resist, and he’d been resisting too long already.

  He pulled her tight against his body and dipped his head to cover her mouth with his own.

  Chapter Eight

  Shock held Lara frozen for the first few seconds. Then the heat of Rowan’s embrace seeped through the numbness and everything inside her simply melted.

  If she’d been able to think clearly—heck, if she’d been able to think at all—she might have been annoyed by his arrogant assumption that he could take what he wanted just because he was a prince. But her brain seemed to have short-circuited the minute his lips touched hers, and she was lost in the mindlessness of a long-burning passion finally acknowledged.

  His mouth was hot and hungry, not coaxing a response but demanding it. And she was helpless to do anything but respond. Maybe it wasn’t the gentle kiss she might have dreamed about, that her naive heart yearned for, but it was Rowan kissing her, and that was all that mattered.

  His hands were hard and bold as they moved over her body, and she burned everywhere that he touched. They slid from her shoulders, down her back, over the curve of her buttocks to pull her more tightly against him. She could feel his arousal against the throbbing heat between her thighs and instinctively pressed herself even closer.

  He groaned—a raw expression of need that somehow echoed the desperate churning deep inside herself. She held nothing back from him as she returned his kiss with a passion she’d never experienced before. Her lips parted willingly to the searching thrust of his tongue as she lifted her arms to wind them around his neck. Her breasts rubbed against the hard wall of his chest, her pebbled nipples straining against the thin layers of clothing that separated them from more intimate contact.

  A quick tug untied the knot of her robe so that it fell open, and then his hands were on her breasts, his thumbs stroking boldly over the aching peaks so that she gasped with shocked pleasure as arrows of heat speared to her center.

  “You are so damn beautiful.” The words were a ragged whisper against her mouth as his hands continued to explore her curves through the thin cotton. “So damn tempting.”

  She didn’t know how to respond to that, so she said nothing. Instead she let her instincts guide her and nipped at the sexy curve of his bottom lip.

  His hands had found the hem of her nightdress and dipped beneath, the stroke of his broad palms over her bare skin making her tremble and ache with wanting.

  Her heart was pounding, her blood was racing, and her body was aching for something she wasn’t entirely sure she understood but somehow knew he could give her.

  She wasn’t completely innocent. She’d been on dates and she’d been kissed, but never had she been kissed like this. Never had she experienced anything that even hinted at such all-consuming passion.

  His hands continued to move over her, light touches and bold strokes that made her tremble and quiver and want. His lips slid away from hers to skim across her cheek, down her neck, then lower still. His mouth covered her breast, and she gasped. His lips closed around the peaked nipple, his tongue laved, and she moaned. She could feel the moist heat of his mouth through the thin barrier of fabric, and she instinctively arched, her fingers sliding through his hair to hold his head at her breast.

  She hadn’t realized that she could feel so much or want so desperately. She’d never expected that her blood could pulse so hot and fast through her veins that it seemed to melt everything inside of her.

  Then his hand slipped between her thighs, touching her where no one had ever touched her before, and sparks danced and skipped toward her center. His fingers moved in a gentle circular motion, caressing her through her panties, and her hips moved in an instinctive and unconscious rhythmic response.

  She barely registered the throaty murmurs that originated somewhere deep inside her, didn’t understand the breathless pleas that tumbled from her lips. There was no sense of time or place—there was only Rowan and a fierce and aching need to be with him. A need that continued to build, an unfamiliar tension escalating deep inside, winding her tighter, spiraling her higher, until she was afraid that she might shatter—and more afraid that she wouldn’t.

  Suddenly he grasped her shoulders, no longer gentle—the fire in his eyes was more fury than passion now as he shoved her away from him, his fingers biting into her flesh as he held her at arm’s length.

  “Damn it, Lara, when were you going to tell me to stop?”

  She tried to draw a breath, to unscramble the jumble of chaotic emotions that continued to course through her system and understand what had caused him to pull away from her. But her mind was still floating in a misty fog of delirium, unwilling to accept his abrupt withdrawal.

  “I don’t want you to stop,” she admitted breathlessly.

  “I want you to kiss me again. I want you to touch me.”

  He dropped his hands and stepped back, shaking his head. “Are you really so naive that you don’t know where this is heading? Or so shameless you don’t care?”

  She pressed a hand to her chest, as if the gesture might settle the frantic pounding of her heart. She felt chilled all of a sudden, cold without the heat of his body against hers, and colder still when she finally registered the scorn in hi
s dark brown eyes.

  How could he kiss her with such passion one moment and glower at her with such disapproval the next? What had she done—or not done—to cause this change in his mood?

  She started to speak, to apologize, then stopped short, not sure what she was supposed to be apologizing for. “You kissed me,” she finally said. “So why are you acting as if I did something wrong?”

  “Because you—we—shouldn’t have let things go as far as they did. I could have taken you, right here in the middle of the hall outside of my nephew’s bedroom, and you wouldn’t have done anything to stop me, would you?”

  She wished she had an easy response to dismiss what had happened between them as readily as he had done, but she wasn’t that experienced or sophisticated and she wasn’t going to lie to him.

  “I don’t know,” she admitted, fumbling as she reached for the belt of her robe. “I didn’t think about where we were or what was happening. I couldn’t think. When you kissed me, when you touched me—it was like my mind just shut off. I’ve never felt like that before.”

  His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean—you’ve never felt like that before?”

  Where she’d been cold only moments before, the intensity of his gaze had her cheeks flushing again, though the heat was from embarrassment rather than desire this time.

  “I mean that no one has ever kissed me like that, or touched me the way you touched me.”

  When she finally managed to knot the belt and looked up at him again, she found he was staring at her.

  “You can’t be a virgin,” he said flatly.

  She wouldn’t have thought it possible, but her face flamed even hotter. “You didn’t approve of me when you thought I was a woman of loose morals, and now you seem to disapprove of my inexperience.”

  “Let’s clarify that,” he said carefully. “Are you telling me that you have little experience…or no experience?”

  “I’ve been kissed before.”

  Rowan frowned at her.

  “Kissed,” he echoed disbelievingly.

  Her chin lifted. “I’m not going to apologize for not sleeping around.”

  “No one is asking you to apologize,” he told her.

  “Then why are you angry with me?”

  He scrubbed his hands over his face. “I’m angry at myself,” he finally admitted. “For not realizing you were innocent.”

  “You think you should have known?” she challenged.

  “Yes.” He caught her gaze, held it. “And even now, even knowing that you are untouched—Mi Dios—I can’t help but want you still.”

  Her heart pounded, her throat went dry. “You still…want me?”

  “I’ve wanted you for a long time,” he admitted. “And even knowing that I shouldn’t have let things go as far as they did, I can’t seem to stop wanting you.”

  “I haven’t been saving myself,” she told him. “I just never met anyone who made me want to take a physical relationship to the next level—until you.”

  He took a careful and deliberate step away from her. “You’re even more innocent than I guessed if you don’t realize what an admission like that can do to a man.”

  “Tell me,” she said.

  He shook his head, knowing she would be impossible to resist if she had any hint of the power she had over him.

  “Go to your room and lock the door, Lara,” he said instead.

  She took a step toward him, then another. “I’m not afraid of you, Your Highness.”

  “I would think, under the circumstances, that you could dispense with my title,” he said wryly.

  Though her cheeks flushed, her gaze never wavered. “I’m not afraid of you…Rowan.”

  It was the first time he’d ever heard her speak his name, and the way she said it now—a soft, husky whisper on lips that were erotically swollen from his kisses—was unbearably arousing.

  He tried to remember that she was more than a beautiful young woman ripe for seduction—she was an employee of the royal household, the nanny deeply loved by his brother’s children, and she was innocent. It was that last thought that helped him snap a tight leash on his raging desire, and instead of dragging her into his arms to pick up where they left off, he touched a gentle hand to her cheek. “It would be better for both of us if you were.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I have only five months left to find a bride,” he said, his hand dropping away as he reminded both of them of this fact, “and I can’t let myself be distracted from that task.”

  She nodded her agreement. “Of course, Your Highness.”

  His smile was wry. “We’re back to the title again, are we?”

  “I think it’s wise.” She dipped into a curtsy. “Good night.”

  “Good night, Lara.”

  Rowan watched her disappear into her own room, listening for the telltale click after the door closed behind her. But she didn’t slide the lock into place, and he couldn’t help but wonder if it was because she trusted him to act honorably or because she didn’t want him to.

  Turning away from the temptation, he went to his rooms and took a very cold shower.

  As the icy water pounded against his skin, he tried to clear his mind of all thoughts of Lara. But he could still taste the flavor of her kiss, feel the satin smoothness of her skin, and hear her throaty sighs. His body was almost numb with the cold when he finally shut off the spray—but his blood was still pulsing with need.

  He yanked a towel from the heated bar and damned himself for being such a fool.

  He should have learned his lesson years ago, should have heeded the warning bells that sounded in his head the first time he set eyes on her. He’d experienced the same type of immediate and intense attraction only once before and had soon regretted allowing himself to be seduced by the temptation of Margot Olivier.

  He’d just started college when they met. She was the teaching assistant for his first-year philosophy course, three years his senior, worldly, sophisticated and stunningly beautiful. He’d been instantly smitten, and when she’d told him she loved him, he believed her.

  It had taken him almost two years to realize she loved the perks of being a royal girlfriend more than she loved him. She’d used his title to gain them access to the most popular dance clubs and entertainment venues, and Rowan had been so happy to be with her, he hadn’t cared. Until it got to the point where she seemed to be partying all the time, drinking more than she could handle, experimenting with drugs. He tried to get her to stop, but she accused him of being a spoilsport.

  He finally walked away, convinced that she would give up her dangerous lifestyle when she realized it was tearing them apart. She didn’t even notice until the time came when she needed him to bail her out of trouble and he was no longer around.

  That was when she’d told him she was pregnant.

  He’d been stunned and terrified but determined to do the right thing. Then he found out she’d even lied about carrying his baby, and he realized he had done the right thing when he walked away from her the first time.

  Of course, he’d been a lot younger then, a lot more susceptible. And Margot had been a master manipulator. She’d enticed and seduced, using his desire for her to get what she wanted. In the end, she’d left him not so much brokenhearted as disillusioned. And determined to never make the same mistake again.

  He didn’t really believe that Lara was anything like Margot. He didn’t think she could fake her sweetness and innocence—or the confusion and hurt that had shone in her eyes when he’d sent her away.

  He’d berated her for almost letting herself be taken in the hallway, but he was the one who’d almost taken her there. He’d been so wrapped up in the passion of their kiss that he hadn’t cared about anything but assuaging the violent need churning in his blood.

  If he hadn’t managed to hang on to that one last shred of decency, he might have laid her down on the antique carpet or pressed her up against the silk-covered walls without a thought f
or anything but burying himself in her hot body.

  And he couldn’t help but think he’d be feeling a hell of a lot better right now if he had.

  Lara needed to get away from the palace. She often used her day off to catch up on homework, but she’d finished her last assignment and written her last exam, so she actually had free time for a change. She considered taking one of the horses for a ride or lazing by the pool with a good book, but both of those possibilities carried with them the risk of running into Rowan, and she wasn’t quite ready to face him again.

  She had no idea what his plans were for the day. He might be on his way out of the country for all she knew, but after last night, she wasn’t going to hang around to find out.

  Rowan might have made the first move, but she’d matched him step for step after that. Not just a willing participant but an eager one. There was no denying the way she had responded to his kiss, his touch. He’d stirred wants and needs inside her that she hadn’t imagined.

  And in the light of day, though she might be embarrassed by what had happened between them, ashamed by her wanton behavior, she was unable to deny that there was a part of her that wished he hadn’t stopped. Not that she really wanted him to make love with her in the middle of the hallway, but she really wanted him to make love with her.

  As much as she wished he hadn’t stopped, she knew that an affair with the prince would only lead to heartache. She’d yet to offer either her body or her heart to a man, and she feared that she couldn’t share the former without also sacrificing the latter. Or maybe she already had.

  It was a thought that niggled at her on her way into town and continued to worry her as she wandered through the market and browsed in the shops. Though she usually loved visiting Port Augustine with its little boutiques and sidewalk cafés, as she found herself navigating through crowds of tourists doing the same thing, she found her heart just wasn’t in it today.

  Deciding company and conversation were what she needed rather than solitary brooding, she turned toward the art gallery. She found Tanis finishing up a tour and tagged along for the end of it. When Tanis had answered the last question and said goodbye to the last visitor, she turned to Lara with a bright, if somewhat weary, smile.