High School Lover
Page 18
She sighed and brought my lips to hers. “I’m ready, Andrew. I…want to do everything with you.”
There was nothing I wanted to do more than drive my dick hard inside of her. “Are you sure?” Of course, I wanted it, too, but I didn’t want to hurt her and turn this sublime experience into a nightmare by humping her like an animal. This was Loren, my obsession, my muse, not some random girl who wanted a good-time fuck.
“I’m sure. I want to know what it will be like to feel that close to you.”
I pulled my shorts and underwear down over my hips and my cock sprang out like a damn jack-in-the-box. I saw Loren’s blush as her wide eyes flashed in what seemed like amazement. She reached out, at first hesitant, but grew bolder. She’d touched me before, but again it had been in the dark. Her fingers lingered on my tip and spread the precum that was oozing out around my head. I set a world record jumping out of the bed, getting a condom out of my wallet, and sheathing myself.
I wanted to be inside of her so damn bad, but I carefully brought myself down with my dick nestled between her legs. I gently pressed my tip against her, and Christ, the wetness and warmth were unbearable. But she was so damn tight.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” I breathed, trying to exercise some restraint.
A small sigh escaped her and she furrowed her brows as if she were conflicted with pleasure and pain. “I want this, Andrew. I need this.”
“You sure?” I already felt like I was about to prematurely ejaculate with the head of my cock pressing into her channel. I nudged harder and felt her tense. I brought my hand between us, massaging her sensitive spot, and she began to relax. I was halfway inside of her. And, oh my God, it felt incredible. Her expressive face was scrunched up as if she were experiencing some kind of painful ecstasy. When I pushed as far in as I could, I hesitated, again watching her.
“Fuck, Loren, this feeling is indescribable. Please tell me I’m not hurting you,” I groaned, as though I could stop what was happening. I was past the point of no return.
“You’re not,” she whispered and pulled my mouth down to hers, reassuring me.
I was in a free fall; my sanity was gone. I pulled back almost completely, leaving in the tip, and then slid in deeply. It would take only a few more pumps before I blew like a geyser, but I was trying my best to give her a happy ending, too. I continued to finger her clit as I stilled.
She began grinding on me and had that look like she was bubbling up again, about to burst. I continued gliding in and out, and what started as soft moans increased to high-pitched cries. Knowing she was at her breaking point, I bent down and covered her mouth with mine as she came on my dick. The tightness and the clenching were too much. I pushed as deep as I could and was certain I was high-pitched crying, too, when the overwhelming pressure in my dick set off like a grand explosion.
And, I kept jerking until I had nothing left. When my body stopped shaking, I looked down at her and knew that I had never experienced anything like that in my life. Loren was the air I needed to breathe; her words were the bricks that kept me pieced together. Her body was the temple where I wanted to worship. I didn’t know if I believed in God and eternity but, with her, I felt like I was knocking on heaven’s gates.
She looked at me with such tenderness in her face and touched my cheek. “That was so…beautiful.”
Overwhelmed by the moment, I said the only thing on my mind: “I love you.”
She didn’t return the words and I was a little self-conscious. However, her lips found mine and she poured her emotions into the kiss. In my mind, she was expressing how she felt.
“I want to be with you forever.” She said it quietly as she nuzzled my chest, but the message was loud and clear in my head. She wanted to be with me, and all seemed like it would work out. I was still semihard inside of her, and it wouldn’t take much to go again, but I was concerned about her. “Are you all right?” I asked, as I lifted my head.
She blushed. “Just a little sore.”
Against my body’s wishes I pulled out but held her beside me. I rolled onto my side, taking her with me.
Later we cuddled and talked about our future. “I’m scared, Andrew, my parents won’t understand.” Loren gripped me tighter and burrowed into my chest.
“Don’t be. We’ll talk to them together,” I reassured her. It wasn’t like she was throwing her life away, running off with an escaped convict or something. We had plans. We’d go to college together. Work. Live together. It all sounded plausible until we heard a noise down the hall.
“Loren! Whose truck is that outside?” Her mother’s voice boomed down the hallway.
“My parents are home. Oh, my God!” Loren shoved away and frantically grasped her clothes.
I almost felt like a spectator watching the craziness, but somehow I kicked myself into action as I tried to gather my clothes. I heard her mother at her door. I felt like I was watching a bad movie, like this wasn’t really happening.
“What the hell is going on?” Her mother rammed through the door glowering at Loren like she was hiding something horrible. She caught me as I was buttoning up my shorts. Loren had just pulled her tank on without a bra. She had her panties on at least.
“Trey!” her mother screamed to her husband. She glared at me as if I were a sexual predator.
“Stop, Mom! You don’t know him!” Loren yelled.
“Get out of our house!” I was still trying to collect my things. I glanced at Loren, and she had the most depressed look on her face as if life between us was over.
Her dad entered the room and was quiet for like a second until he saw me putting on my shirt in Loren’s room.
“Mr. Douglas, it’s not what you think. I love your daughter, and I want to be with her, take care of her.”
He went off on me like a crazed beast—confronting me, shoving me, punching me in the jaw a few times. “You piece of shit! You have the fucking nerve to come in our house and disrespect us? Disrespect our daughter like this?”
“Dad. Don’t hurt him. He did nothing wrong.” By now, Loren was hanging on her father’s arm, trying to stop him. As angry as I was, I wasn’t going to fight Loren’s dad.
He slung her off. And, I almost forgot my resolve and decked him, but knew that would only make matters worse. “Put some damn clothes on, Loren. Now!” He clenched the back of my neck and dragged me to the door. “Get the hell out of our house before I call the police.”
I dug my heels in, twisting my head back. “I love you, Loren!” Her face was splotchy with tears, and her mouth quivered. Her dad’s fingers ground into my neck as he shoved me forward. As I allowed her dad to drag me out of the house like garbage, all I could think of was how I needed to make this right. “I love her.”
“Don’t!” He heaved me through the front door. “If you care for her so much, you’ll leave her alone. Loren has everything going for her, and you’re trying to ruin it. If you ever come around here again, I’ll have you arrested.” He slammed the door in my face. I stared at the door for several moments, fuming, before I headed to my truck. Once I felt somewhat calmer, I convinced myself Loren’s parents just needed some time, and then Loren and I could be together. We had one week of school left, and then we would be free to do what we wanted.
Present
My head was swimming from downing too much wine too fast. I needed to slow down and drink some water because I sounded like an enraged person lashing out about how unfair life was. I was angry, to be truthful, but at myself for not taking advantage of the opportunities I had. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous of Andrew’s successes. He had the career in the field he loved and a stunning girlfriend, which was like a huge billboard in my face that read “He’s not yours!”
“Hey, the past is the past. I’m not going to lie and say I wasn’t messed up over you, but we were in high school—things happen, people change and grow up.” He shrugged like our past meant nothing to him.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.�
�� The words came out of my mouth, but I knew it was a lie on my part since I still had strong feelings for him. I remembered how close we had been in the past as if it were yesterday. He’d told me he loved me. I’d loved him, too. Spending more time with him only pushed the dagger of emotions deeper into my heart.
“Loren, you barely touched your salad. You really need to eat something, since you’re drinking that wine like a champ.”
The rational side of me knew I would pay for it later, but I wasn’t hungry. However, I stabbed the leafy vegetables and lifted them to my mouth to appease him.
“How’s your brother? I see he made the majors. Just like you said he would.”
He smiled fondly. “Yeah, he did. I try to go to as many games as I can. He lives in Dallas during the off-season.”
“You watch him play?” I was somewhat surprised because Andrew used to talk about how he hated going to games.
“Of course I do. I know I said I hated baseball, but I was acting like an angry twit back then. John and I are tight now.”
He pushed his plate aside and leaned his elbows on the table with his strong hands loosely folded. The sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up on his arms, revealing tanned forearms and a tattoo. I remembered when he got this tattoo in high school. It was a crazy design, based on one of his sketches. It resembled an eye with a knife buried in it with blood spattered around it. I didn’t understand the significance of it until he enlightened me. He explained it more like a kaleidoscope with the point of the knife being the truth, and everything surrounding it represented others’ perceptions of the truth. I remembered when my mom saw his tattoo that fateful day and thought he was a psychopath.
“You look great, by the way,” he commented as he studied my face.
“You do, too. You look more muscular, broader. Do you work out?”
“Yeah, I run and go to the gym.”
“I bet you’ve had a lot of girls because of your fame.”
“Didn’t you know? I’m kind of a big deal.” He said it in a self-effacing manner, but I knew he had probably been with a lot of women, and my jealousy resurfaced again. I had no right to be upset. Like he said, it happened years ago. Get over it, Loren. But my tortured soul couldn’t. “So, what’s it like hanging around all those big stars?” I asked, trying to change the subject.
“Not as great as you would think.”
“Whatever, you’re just downplaying it.”
He raked his hands through his hair in frustration “No I’m not. It’s a very superficial industry.”
“Kind of like dating a super model?” I slapped my hand over my mouth and raised my eyes in horror. Oh, my God, that actually came out of my mouth.
Andrew, too, had a shocked look on his face.
“I’m sorry. That was out of line.” I took a long gulp of water, swearing to myself not to drink any more wine.
He nodded. “Are you okay?”
I took his concern to mean he thought I wasn’t mentally stable. “I’m not depressed, Andrew, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“I was worried because you just don’t look like, I don’t know…”—he looked around—“you. You just seem really unhappy.”
“If I seem that way it’s because we just buried our friend. I feel dejected that I never followed through with my dreams like you did. And I don’t have someone, like you have, to come home to.”
“So, no boyfriend?”
“No, I’m a bad picker, I guess.” That was an understatement. Every relationship I’d ever had crashed and burned because I’d never met anyone I’d had a real connection with like the person sitting in front of me. “Please keep your sarcastic comments to yourself.”
He kept his mouth closed on that subject. “It’s never too late to start over. You should start writing again. How will you know if you can ever reach your dreams if you don’t try?”
Maybe I could. “I wish you could help me, Andrew,” I said under my breath with my head down.
“I would help you.”
“You weren’t supposed to hear that.” I took another sip of water.
“I’m serious, Loren, I would love to look at your work.” A familiar warmth shot through me. It took me back to high school again when he wanted to read my work.
“Why would you want to do that for me?”
“Because you have talent, and I remember back to the people who helped me along the way. I guess you could say I want to pay it forward.”
“Actually, I lied. I have been writing a lot lately.” I’d debated telling him what I was writing about because it sure as hell wasn’t poetry, and who knew if he would laugh at me for the content.
“Really? That’s encouraging.” The waiter returned, and he took Andrew’s plate. He looked at my half-eaten salad in question. I nodded for him to take it, too.
“Loren, you barely ate anything.” He frowned as if I couldn’t make decisions for myself.
I glanced around the restaurant avoiding his eyes.
“How far do you live from here?”
“About ten minutes. Why?”
“Because I’ll take you home. I don’t think you should drive.”
Before I could answer, the waiter set down the check.
I reached out to look at the bill, but Andrew quickly retrieved it. “I’ve got this.”
I felt guilty ordering a bunch of drinks and making him pay for them. “Andrew, at least let me pay for myself.”
“Don’t worry about it. It’s no big deal.” He extracted his credit card from his wallet and put it with the tab.
The waiter picked up the bill. “Where are you staying tonight?” I asked Andrew.
“Remember how I said my brother lives in Dallas? We share a loft near downtown.”
“I thought you lived in Austin.”
“I do. But I spend time up here, too, to see my family.”
“Oh, I guess you can afford it now. Must be nice.” He rolled his eyes and shifted in his seat as though self-conscious about having money. “So, I bet you go to all the cool shows like ACL and South by Southwest. Just like when you went to Coachella. I couldn’t imagine you liking that festival. I would’ve thought Bonnaroo would be more your thing, but whatever.” Like the drunken idiot I was, I kept rambling on about information that he hadn’t told me.
“How did you know I went to Coachella, Loren?” He drew his brows together.
I cursed to myself when it finally dawned on me what I’d said.
“So?” he asked again. His inquisitive eyes had always been able to see through me when I was lying.
“I kind of saw a picture of you and Alyssa at the concert.”
He smirked. “You kind of did, or you did? And where did you see that picture?”
This was embarrassing because I would have to admit I was trolling his girl online. “Um, on Facebook.” My mind raced, trying to come up with any excuse that didn’t make me seem like a stalker. “After seeing you two last night, I was curious to know what had been going on in your life.” Then I added, “I try to keep up with our old friends on social media. Do you have a personal page?”
“No. I have a public page that promotes my work and raises money for special causes, but I never had any interest in having a personal page and reminiscing with a bunch of people that I was never close to in the first place. I don’t use social media for personal endeavors.”
Oh, okay, Mr. I’m-Too-Cool-for-Social-Media. That was typical Andrew, but I did respect him for that. “I saw your page and donated to the rehab facility.”
“That’s great, Scout. Thank you.” My face heated as he watched me with what seemed like admiration, maybe?
“It wasn’t much, and I certainly haven’t been as selfless as you have, but seeing your posts and reading about wanting to help others, it made me want to be a better person. I did it for Mike, too.”
“I know you did.” He gazed at me intently, and my heart flipped. “I’m sorry for what I said to you yesterday about not se
eing Mike. I know how close you were back then.”
I waved my hand, and my eyes watered up. “I feel horrible that I didn’t see him. We lost touch after my first semester in college.”
He reached out and ran his hand over mine, giving me comfort. And liquid heat pulsed up my arm and into my chest. Settling in my heart. “Hey, don’t cry. If Mike were here he’d probably tell a story about someone getting kicked in the nut sac to make you smile.”
A laugh escaped me. “God, he told the most ridiculous stories.”
“That’s true, but you’re smiling thinking about them.”
He squeezed my hand before breaking contact and swept his palms over the edge of the table as if checking its sturdiness. “So, you stalked my page, too?”
I clutched the back of my hand, needing to rub the remnants of his touch into my skin. “I just wanted to see what you’d been up to, Hollywood.”
“I’m kidding.” He leaned in, giving me a lopsided smile. “I’m glad you liked my movies. Your opinion always meant a lot to me.”
“Is that the only type of writing you do now?”
“No, I’m also working on a book.”
“You are going to write that great American novel, aren’t you?” I asked, remembering him saying that several years ago.
“Trying to. It’s in the early stages right now, though.”
“Can you tell me what it’s about?”
“I’d rather not because I’m still trying to kick around the plot and timeline.” The waiter had brought Andrew’s card back, and he signed the tab. “You ready to go?”
“I guess,” I said half-heartedly, wishing I could spend the rest of the day talking to him. “Thank you for lunch, Andrew.”
“No problem.” He stood up and waited for me to slip out of the booth. “Don’t forget your purse.” He pointed behind me, and I blushed, grabbing it as he held his hand out to steady me while I stood. Yeah, the wine had taken a toll on me. I felt a little dizzy on my feet.
“Can you walk by yourself?”
“Yes, Andrew, I’m not that bad,” I said that, but wasn’t completely convinced myself. He gave me his arm, and I took it. I had on some wedges that were very tall, and the last thing I wanted to do was fall in front of him. That would be embarrassing.