Coleen: Forever (Waking Forever Series Book 5)

by Heather McVea

  Coleen finished reading the first book in the series inside of an hour. She completed the remaining six books just before dawn. Putting the Kindle down, Coleen felt the stories and characters lingering with her.

  The magic and wizardry was childish and misguided, but they were hardly the point. The crux of the books was about friendship, acceptance, loyalty, moving beyond your past to a brighter future, and allowing yourself to love.

  It was also about the loss of childhood and innocence before their time, a theme that had brought Julian to mind repeatedly as Coleen read the books. More than that, Coleen began to understand that in taking Isla from her brother, she was giving the woman forever, while killing Julian’s youth.

  Killing is not so easy as the innocent believe. Remembering the phrase from the book series, Coleen shook her head at the sentimentality of it. Coleen left her bedroom and walked toward the kitchen. She had certainly read books over the centuries that more delicately navigated these themes, but she was reading Harry Potter now, and it resonated with her.

  Filling a stainless steel kettle, Coleen put it on the stove and got a mug down from the cabinet so she could make herself a cup of tea. She was jarred from her thoughts by the sound of footsteps coming down the hall. She had nearly forgotten she had a house guest.

  “Do you want some tea?” Coleen asked as Claudio entered the kitchen. He was slightly disheveled and smelled of whisky, blood, and sex.

  “That would be great.” Claudio smiled, and Coleen could see a trace of blood on the corner of his mouth.

  Coleen tapped the corner of her own mouth. “You’ve got some dried blood.”

  Claudio quickly wiped at his mouth. “Thanks.”

  Coleen got a second mug down and put a tea bag in each before pouring the boiling water over them. Handing the mug to Claudio, she hesitated. “Friend, are you seeing anyone? Have you ever been with anyone long term?”

  Claudio took a sip of tea while looking over the edge of the mug at Coleen. “Well, long term is a bit relative for the likes of you and me, but no. Why – are you interested?” He teasingly raised and lowered his eyebrows.

  Coleen rolled her eyes. “You know better.” She took a drink of her tea. “So, you’re what – two thousand years old, and you’ve never settled down?”

  Claudio put his cup of tea down on the counter. “Do I smell like someone looking to settle down?”

  “Well not now, but ever?” Coleen wasn’t sure Claudio was the best person to be having this conversation with. They had parted ways in the nineteen fifties because Claudio’s appetites were diverging from Coleen’s.

  Coleen had been transitioning away from the historically brutal tendencies of her kind, and embracing a more refined existence. It took her decades. She didn’t completely convert until the living hell she witnessed while in Vietnam, but she hadn’t actively hunted humans in close to fifty years.

  Claudio had also mellowed during the last century, but he still saw humans as nothing more than meals and sexual partners – often at the same time. Coleen didn’t judge her friend for his choices, but she wondered what, if any, joy he took from life.

  “Why are we talking about this?” Claudio asked, his eyes narrowed suspiciously at Coleen.

  “No particular reason. I’ve been reading lately, and several of the books are themed around love and loss.” Coleen forced a casual tone. “I was just curious what your experiences had been.”

  Coleen was not ready to talk to anyone about her feelings for Isla. She knew if she ever was, Rachel would be the only vampire she could trust with the truth. Claudio had a penchant for games, and she didn’t want him seeing her feelings for Isla as something he could meddle in.

  “I fuck around a lot, and I eat.” Claudio boasted. “I’m the worst person to ask about the meaning of life – vampire or otherwise.”

  The corner of Coleen’s mouth twitched up. “My mistake.”

  Claudio smiled. “No harm.”

  Coleen excused herself, and went back to her bedroom. It was nearly six in the morning as she fished her cell phone out of the pocket of her discarded jeans from the night before.

  “Hi.” Rachel’s voice was familiar and welcoming.

  “Hello. Can you meet, or should I come over?” Coleen asked.

  “I’m doing great, Coleen. Thank you for asking.” Rachel jabbed.

  Coleen slammed her eyes shut. It seemed there was no escaping people’s incessant need for small talk. “Sorry, but I am in a bit of a bind, and you’re the only person I can think to talk to.”

  There was a long pause. “Because I’m a vampire or –”

  “Because you’re a friend.” Coleen reassured Rachel.

  “Let’s meet at the Starbucks near Northwest Military and 1604.” Rachel suggested. “In about thirty minutes?”

  “Thank you.” Coleen disconnected the call, and before she could think better of it, texted Isla. Good morning. I enjoyed yesterday. Thank Julian and you for inviting me.

  Coleen tossed the phone on the bed, and proceeded to get dressed. She was pulling her hair back in a loose bun when she heard her phone beep. Coleen delayed looking at the phone. She needed to convince herself that she wasn’t desperate. It wasn’t until she got in her car ten minutes later that she brought up the text screen.

  We should make it a slumber party next time. I have some babysitting credits to burn with Cory… so let me know.

  Coleen sat perfectly still, her finger hovering over the phone’s screen. It wasn’t as if she had never flirted, so a dozen sexy, seductive, and suggestive lines shot through her head. In the end, though it pained her, she didn’t respond. She knew it would be best to wait until after her conversation with Rachel.

  The quiet uncertainty that had been plaguing Coleen for the past three months was growing louder. Though she could not name them, she was aware of subtle shifts in her perceptions, if only superficially. Things she had once thought intrusive, though still lingering near her edges, were now things she might invite in.

  Chapter 10

  “What are you asking me exactly?” Rachel sat across from Coleen, the smell of coffee and steamed milk filling the space around them.

  Coleen glanced down at her untouched cup of tea. She had been working the conversation around to a very specific point for the better part of ten minutes. Now that she had arrived at her actual reason for meeting with Rachel, she found herself floundering.

  “You know what I’m asking.” Coleen was feeling vulnerable and it made her harsh.

  Rachel leaned back, and took a sip of her tea. “To avoid both of us being embarrassed, why don’t you spell it out for me?”

  Coleen looked up, exasperated. “Fine. Rachel, how did you manage the protruding teeth, glowing eyes, and general blood lust when you had sex with a human you didn’t intend to kill or turn?” Coleen arched her eyebrow for emphasis. “There – happy?”

  Rachel took a deep breath. “Yes. I’m thrilled to be having the vampire equivalent of the birds and the bees talk with you. It’s very exciting for me, Coleen.”

  Coleen grabbed her purse from the chair next to her. “I’ve clearly caught you in a mood.”

  Rachel reached for Coleen’s wrist. “Don’t be dramatic.”

  Coleen considered her options. She was already here. She had already started the talk. She may as well finish it. “Then answer my question.” Sensing Rachel was still undecided, Coleen willed the final word past her lips. “Please.”

  Rachel grinned. “Since you asked so nicely.”

  Coleen sat back down. “So?”

  Rachel took a deep breath. “I’ve never been with a human who didn’t know what I was.”

  “So you intended to turn them?”

  Rachel paused and then shook her head. “No. Until Sara, I had never considered turning anyone, and you remember how much I struggled with that decision.”

  Coleen did remember. Rachel had, similar to her own situation, become entangled with Sara because she had decided to
intervene to avoid a tragedy. Ultimately, though at the time it seemed completely absurd to Coleen, the two women fell in love.

  Rachel continued. “You have to tell Isla; otherwise you risk –”

  “I’m not telling her anything.” Coleen was shocked that Rachel would even suggest she divulge her true nature.

  Rachel leveled her gaze on Coleen. “Then you don’t get to be with her. At least not physically.”

  Coleen’s shoulders drooped. “Then not at all. She’s already hinting at sex, and I can’t think of any plausible reason to put her off; so I should just end it.”

  “You could tell her.” Rachel looked closely at Coleen, a flicker of recognition passing over her face. “Have you never been with a human?”

  Coleen rubbed her palm against her forehead. She was already humiliated by the fact she was even engaging in this conversation, what else did she have to lose? “Not to the point of consummation, and only before turning them or killing them.”

  Rachel winced. “If you care for Isla, then you will either tell her the truth, or you will get out of her life.”

  The thought of not knowing Isla and Julian triggered a tightness in Coleen’s chest. “I like her.” The statement was an oversimplification of her feelings for Isla, but it was the most direct.

  “What do you think will happen if you tell her?” Rachel took the lid off her tea, and finished the last of the beverage.

  Coleen looked up as if attempting to solve a complicated math problem. “She panics and I have to kill her. She threatens to tell people and I have to kill her. Or she does either of those things and I turn her, but then Julian becomes like a stranger to her.” She looked back at Rachel. “Or any other variation of that horrific theme.”

  “Or she accepts you.” A quick smile passed across Rachel’s lips. “Sara did.”

  “You know this is not just my burden to bear, Rachel.” Coleen asserted. “It’s not just my secret to keep.”

  “I know that argument, Coleen. You’ve been using it for as long as I’ve known you.”

  “Because it’s true.”

  “That doesn’t make it right.” Rachel countered.

  A long, awkward silence fell between the friends until finally Rachel spoke. Her voice was flat and indifferent. “You are at a different place on the food chain, Coleen. You are at the top of that chain. Never apologize for that, and don’t spend eternity in self-inflicted angst struggling with your nature.” Rachel’s cadences were even and monotone. “Sleep with her, turn her, and let fate dictate the boy’s future.”

  Rachel’s tone shifted and she began to seethe. “You’re ancient and yet you’re pissing yourself over this human. You’ve managed to put her on equal footing with us, and for that you should be ashamed.”

  Coleen recoiled from Rachel, her eyes wide with shock. “Why would you say something like that?”

  Rachel’s posture relaxed as she leaned back in her chair. “It’s what you told me the night I was turned. The pissing yourself part was mine, though.” She took Coleen’s hand in hers. “You don’t think like that anymore, and your reaction to your own words proves that you can change.”

  Coleen looked down at where her hand was joined with Rachel’s. A wave of acceptance washed over her, and it was as if a bell had been rung inside her. “You’re right. I trust Isla, and I’ll – really consider telling her.”

  Rachel smiled. “Well, that’s something.”

  Coleen pursed her lips. “So – how did you tell Sara?”

  Rachel released Coleen’s hand. “Well, I was scared to death; so I managed to present it in the form of a riddle.”

  Coleen frowned. “What?”

  Rachel shrugged. “I asked her how old she thought I was.”

  “That must have been really awkward.” Coleen couldn’t imagine what she might say to Isla, but was resolved not to take her friend’s very indirect route.

  “That’s putting it mildly.” Rachel grinned. “But if you decide to move forward, don’t you dare do it like Emma did. She told Ash about Ela, and that vampires existed, but failed to mention she was a member of the club.”

  Coleen leaned in, resting her elbows on the table. “And?”

  Rachel cringed. “Ash comes over to our house, furious and demanding explanations about Ela, and then I casually mention Emma is a vampire, and the poor woman fainted.”

  Coleen laughed, but her mind turned toward the moment she might utter the words to Isla. For all of her insights, she could not see the outcome. The point that drove her forward was the realization and acceptance that she wanted something more with Isla.

  It was time for her to welcome something new, something emotional, something human into her life. It was a life full of things, but otherwise empty. Coleen knew the need to no longer be idle in her existence would drive her towards what she must do with Isla and Julian.

  ***

  Coleen had been standing on Isla’s doorstep for nearly three minutes. She had responded to Isla’s suggestive text after leaving her meeting with Rachel, and for the past two days had been both anticipating and dreading her date with Isla.

  Coleen heard footsteps behind the door, and a moment later Isla was standing in front of her. “Are you okay?”

  Nodding, Coleen managed to smile. “I think the bell must be broken.”

  Isla frowned, and reached past Coleen to press the doorbell button. A series of chimes sounded from inside the house. “Seems fine.”

  “My mistake. Here, I got you something.” Coleen pulled a small wrapped package from her purse.

  Isla hesitated and then took the package. “Thank you, but you know you don’t have to bring something every time you come over.” She stepped back so Coleen could come inside.

  “Honestly if I thought you expected it, I would be less inclined to do it.” Coleen gave Isla a quick peck on the cheek.

  “That’s honest.” Isla shut the door.

  Coleen stood perfectly still in the narrow entryway, and it occurred to her she was nervous. “Are you ready?”

  Isla took Coleen’s hand and led her into the living room. “I’m that woman tonight. I need ten more minutes. So have a seat.” She started to walk out of the room, and then stopped abruptly. “Crap – ah, would you like something to drink?”

  Coleen shook her head. “I’m fine, and take your time. Our reservations aren’t for another half hour.”

  Isla smiled and left Coleen alone in the room. Am I planning on making a complete ass out of myself for the duration on the evening, or am I front loading? Coleen got up, and crossed the room. Hung on the wall closest to the hall were several photos, Coleen assumed, of Isla’s family when her parents were still alive.

  In most of the photos it was clear Julian was no older than six or seven, and one was of a teenage Isla donning a very pronounced set of braces. Coleen smiled, amazed at what ten years and puberty could do to the human form.

  “You’ve discovered my formative years. Such as they were.” Isla came into the living room. She was wearing a pair of dark boot cut jeans, brown leather platform sandals, and a light blue Henley style blouse.

  Coleen meant to say something snarky and clever, but the words didn’t form properly. “You look beautiful.”

  Isla paused before slipping a diamond stud earring into her left earlobe. “Thank you.”

  Coleen nodded toward the unopened gift Isla had laid on the chair next to her purse. “Can I persuade you to open that before we go out?”

  Isla, snapping the back on the second earring, smiled. “Twist my arm.” She picked up the package and quickly tore into it. Coleen knew she had made the right choice when a small gasp escaped Isla, and her eyes lit-up with surprise.

  “Coleen –” Isla carefully opened the gray, cloth covered book. She turned one of the yellowed pages, her eyes quickly skimming the page. “I can’t accept this.”

  Coleen sighed. “Of course you can. You clearly love it, and it’s the whole reason you do what you do.”

>   Isla stared, mesmerized by the first edition of Darwin’s On the Origin of Species by Means of Natural Selection. “I can’t imagine what this must have cost you.”

  Shrugging, Coleen carefully took the book. “Less than you think.” She turned the book over in her hands. “It’s only the American first edition after all.” She winked at Isla.

  The truth was the book had cost less than two dollars, or the modern day equivalent of twenty six dollars when she bought it in New York City in eighteen sixty two. A small fortune back in the day, it had been one of the last purchases Coleen made before she and her then companion, Lewis, had relocated to Virginia. She recalled that particular period of time not because of the brutality of the American Civil War, but because that was when she first met Emma.

  “So there’s no point in me telling you it’s too much?” Isla put her hand on Coleen’s forearm.

  Coleen handed the book back to Isla. “It would be a complete waste of your time.”

  “Thank you.” Isla pulled Coleen to her and eagerly pressed her warm lips to Coleen’s cool ones. Coleen surrendered herself to the warmth and feel of Isla against her. Her lips moved along Isla’s jawline, and down to where her neck and shoulder met.

  Isla took several steps backwards, bringing Coleen along with her. Turning, she pushed Coleen back onto the sofa. She straddled Coleen, and resumed kissing her. Coleen’s head was spinning, and she felt the burning in the back of her throat growing as Isla’s lips moved from her mouth to her neck.

  Shards of electricity shot through Coleen as Isla’s hand slid under her blouse.

  Urgently, Coleen lifted them both up, and positioned Isla on her back. Desperate to be closer to her, Coleen unbuttoned and then unzipped Isla’s jeans. Tugging the trousers down, Coleen thrust the full length of her finger into Isla, gasping as a sheath of warmth and wetness wrapped around her.

  Isla cried out and arched her hips against Coleen’s onslaught, her heart pounding as she clutched and grabbed at her shoulders. Then inexplicably, Coleen saw blood pooling on the sofa under Isla’s head, and great cascades of it began to flow onto the floor.