The Ashes of Longbourn

by Schertz, Melanie

  THE ASHES OF LONGBOURN

  Written and Published by Melanie A Schertz

  Edited by Pat Weston

  Copywrite 2013 Melanie A Schertz

  Dedicated to my family and friends for their support and love, especially my dear friend and editor, Pat Weston, who has corrected my many errors.

  A thank you goes out to those who read my work and have become friends through the stories I have written. Your encouragement and comments have given me the strength to keep improving.

  I am grateful to you, Jane Austen, for your wonderful characters that have lived throughout the past 200 years, and brought so much love to the lives of many. Here’s to another 200 years of people enjoying your stories.

  This is a work of fiction. Any names, characters, places, and incidents are either a created by the author’s imagination or are used with no intention of resembling actual persons, living or dead, events, or places. Any resemblance is entirely coincidental.

  Chapter 1

  Fitzwilliam Darcy was enjoying the walk in the park surrounding his aunt’s home of Rosings Park, in Kent one sunny spring morning. Usually Darcy despised the annual visit he made to his aunt’s home each Easter, but this year he was beside himself with joy.

  This year, he was surprised to find his aunt’s clergyman, Mr Collins, had married the once Charlotte Lucas, now Charlotte Collins, a lady Darcy had met on his visit, the previous autumn, to the estate his friend, Charles Bingley, had leased. Darcy had met the then Charlotte Lucas who lived in the nearby village of Meryton. The joy Darcy was feeling was from being reunited with Mrs Collins’ close friend, Miss Elizabeth Bennet. While visiting Bingley at the estate of Netherfield, the closest neighbors were the Bennet family of the estate of Longbourn. From the moment that Darcy had first laid eyes on the enchanting Elizabeth Bennet, he knew he had lost his heart.

  Most of the times they spoke, there was a great deal of teasing, as Elizabeth was highly intelligent and had a quick wit. And each time Darcy looked into her brown eyes, seeing them sparkle with life, Darcy felt his heart beat faster.

  Before Darcy left Netherfield, he was introduced to Mr Collins, who informed him that Lady Catherine had bestowed the living of Hunsford Parish on the newly ordained clergyman.

  Mr Collins turned out to be the cousin to Elizabeth’s father, and, as there was no heir born to the Bennets, Mr Collins was the next to inherit. Elizabeth tolerated her father’s cousin enough to come to Hunsford, only due to wishing to spend time with Charlotte who had been her friend. Darcy knew enough about the man from the first time he met him on the streets of Meryton. The clergyman was a sycophantic buffoon. Most people that Darcy’s aunt employed knew that Lady Catherine de Bourgh thought herself better than all the rest and she expected everyone to bow at her feet.

  As Darcy walked, he found himself moving closer and closer to the parsonage at Hunsford. He knew he should stay away, but he was drawn there, wishing to see Elizabeth. She had always been fond of long walks in the morning, and Darcy thought she used the walks to be away from her cousin as he prepared his sermon for the week.

  Seeing a flash of yellow moving amongst the trees, Darcy knew instinctively that it would be Elizabeth. Quickening his steps, he moved in her direction with the hope of catching up with her. When he was finally close enough, Darcy called out to her. “Miss Elizabeth, it is a pleasure to see you here on such a fine day. I am not surprised, though, as I know how fond you are of your rambles in nature.”

  Elizabeth was surprised to see Darcy, though she had seemed to encounter the man often since her arrival at her cousin’s home. She could not understand why he would seek her out, as Elizabeth was sure that he disliked her. All of the times they had spoken, when he was visiting Netherfield, had ended in arguments. “And I see that you are enjoying the day as well. How is your visit to Rosings Park? Are you enjoying your visit with your aunt and cousin?”

  “The visit with my aunt and cousin is, as usual, quite tedious. My aunt, as you well know, can be a very difficult woman. If you do not attend to her instructions, she will not rest until she informs you as to what you are doing wrong. And Anne is too frail to stand up to her mother, so she allows Aunt Catherine to make decisions for her.”

  Hearing him speak so openly with regards to his family members was shocking to Elizabeth. “That is sad indeed, for I would not wish to be told how to live my life. If my mother had had her way, this would be my home and I would be married to Mr Collins now.”

  Frowning, Darcy was not prepared to hear such a statement. “Your mother wished you to marry that toady? He does not deserve such an intelligent and vivacious young lady such as you. I am grateful that you did not find yourself bound in marriage to him.”

  Elizabeth blushed at his compliment. “My mother, as you have seen for yourself, is tireless in her pursuit of marrying us all off as quickly as possible. Since Mr Collins is to inherit my father’s estate, my mother wished for me to marry him so that she would be secured in not having to move from Longbourn. As I am not Mamma’s favorite daughter, she had no difficulty in sacrificing me.”

  “Your mother may have decided to make a choice to protect her future, but I cannot understand why she would choose you, of her daughters. From what I have seen of your sister Mary, she seems much more fitting to be a parson’s wife. If I am not mistaken, I have seen her reading sermons on occasions when Bingley and I visited Longbourn.”

  Elizabeth was shocked at such a revelation. She had not thought of Mr Darcy seeing anything but fault in all that surrounded him. “You noticed my sister’s reading material? I am surprised at this revelation, Mr Darcy.”

  “Why so, Miss Elizabeth? I am observant of most people. One of the occupations I have at gatherings. As you most likely know, I do not do well at large gatherings; it is difficult for me to speak with others.”

  “I do not play well at the pianoforte, but it is, as your aunt stated at dinner last night, that I do not practice enough. Perhaps you should take your aunt’s advice as well.” Elizabeth teased him.

  Attempting to tease back, Darcy wore a devilish smile as he spoke. “But I would need a willing person who would allow me to practice with them. Do you know of any such person who accepts such a challenge?”

  “Well, as it is would be of aid to you, I could be prevailed upon to take the challenge. And what would you prefer to discuss? The weather or of the war, or, perhaps you prefer to speak on current fashions of women’s gowns?” Elizabeth thought that this would put an end to Darcy’s behavior, as it would require him to continue a conversation with her. She was sure that he would be wishing to bid her farewell and return to his aunt’s home.

  A chuckle came from Darcy, and he turned his attention to the vixen beside him. “I am somewhat current on ladies fashions, as my sister discusses them often and I have escorted her to the modiste’s shop many times. The weather, well, I believe we can both agree that the day has started beautifully. My cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, would be better able to discuss the state of the war. Perhaps we could speak of Hertfordshire and the people there.”

  “I would have thought you had had your fill of our neighborhood, Mr Darcy. You could not leave it fast enough.” Elizabeth said as she glanced sideways at him.

  Darcy frowned. “I do not understand, Miss Elizabeth. I had no regrets to my visiting your neighborhood, with the exception that I had to return to Town when I did. I wished that I had been able to spend more time to know you better.”

  “Me?” Elizabeth “Forgive me for thinking that you could not leave Hertfordshire quickly enough, especially wishing to be away from me. I believe you told Mr Bingley that I was tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt you to dance. Every time we were in the same ro
om, we argued.”

  Darcy could not understand where this conversation took a turn down a very different path than he had planned. “I am highly ashamed of my saying such words, and even more ashamed that you heard them. I was frustrated with my friend, as he is so very easy in conversations and expected me to be the same.” He walked a little bit away from Elizabeth for a moment, gathering his thoughts. “Do you honestly believe we were arguing?” He said as he turned back to face her.

  “I must be honest, I did. I thought you only looked at me to find fault.” Elizabeth said as she looked down.

  “No, Miss Elizabeth, never fault. To be honest, for some time now, I have thought you to be the most beautiful woman of my acquaintance. You have enchanted me, body and soul.”

  Gasping, Elizabeth turned her face upwards, searching his eyes for the truth. There, in the depths of his blue eyes, she could see the kindness that she had never noticed before. “But the way you behaved in Meryton, your refusal to speak with others, you always appeared to be judging us beneath your station.

  Darcy shook his head. “Forgive me for my behavior while in your neighborhood. I have never been able to converse easily, and in large groups of people, I fear speaking as I am terribly shy. My cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, says I put up a mask and hide behind it when I fear being with others. I must have appeared quiet retched for you to think I thought so little of your neighbors. To be honest, I quite liked your neighborhood.”

  “In truth?” Elizabeth asked. “That is the reason you did not dance with anyone, even though men were few and many young lady sat alone?”

  “Since I came of age, every dance I have attended, I have felt as if I were a side of beef, with everyone wishing a bite. The mothers and their daughters wishing to capture my hand, the fathers who wish the financial gain of having me in their family, and even the married women who wish to have a dalliance with me. I only wish to be seen for myself, what I have to offer as me. Not Pemberley, not my family’s fortune, for what I am as a person.”

  Seeing Darcy for the first time in such a manner, Elizabeth was amazed by how wrong she had been about him. All the times she had thought ill of him, thinking that he was a rude and uncaring man, how ill she had treated him for the insult that she had been punishing him for. Her wounded pride had dealt him a cruel blow for his words at the Assembly. It was a few moments before she realized that he was speaking again.

  “When I came to Netherfield, it was a dark time for me, as well. The summer last year had dealt me and my sister a cruel blow and that may have also left me feeling timid in the company of others.” Darcy looked into Elizabeth’s eyes to see if she would be willing to hear the rest. “It was, indeed, a very difficult time for me.”

  Elizabeth could see that there was pain in Darcy’s expression and she could not understand it. She knew from the stories that had been spread through Meryton by George Wickham that Darcy was a proud man, but she now knew how wrong she was in believing the man to be excessively proud. At this moment, she knew that he was not being proud; he was a man in misery. “Mr Darcy, I assure you, you may speak with me and I will keep your confidence.”

  “I know that you can be trusted, Miss Elizabeth. I have struggled with having someone to speak with of this matter, but it is quite difficult. Especially when I know that it will be difficult for someone such as you to hear this tale.”

  Seeing a bench near the edge of the park, Elizabeth motioned to it. “Perhaps we should take a seat and you can tell me the tale from the start. And I promise you, I will listen to all that you have to say.”

  Darcy nodded his head and they walked to the nearby bench. Once seated, Darcy began to speak. “You, of course, are aware that I grew up with Mr Wickham.” As she nodded her head, Darcy continued. “Mr Wickham’s father was a valued steward to my own father, and when he died; my father’s respect of the father was given to the son. Unfortunately, George Wickham is not at all the good and decent man that his father was.”

  It was obvious that Elizabeth had heard many of Wickham’s tales of woe at the hands of Darcy. “My father sent Wickham to school with me, and attempted to instill some of the same values in the son that the father had had. It was of no use. My father’s last attempt to reform Wickham was in his will. Father wished Wickham to take orders and left a valuable living at Kympton to Wickham once he had. After my father’s death, Wickham decided that he did not wish to become a man of the cloth, and asked for the value of the living to be paid to him so that he might study law. I knew that he was being dishonest, but I also knew that he would never be appropriate to lead a congregation. We signed a contract, giving him three thousand pounds and he relinquished all rights to the inheritance.”

  Elizabeth gasped. Wickham had told quite a different tale. “If he had so much money, why does he claim to be poor?”

  “He claims to be poor now because he is, though not at my doing. It is due to his gambling and drinking, the debts of honor, most of which have never been repaid. He has ruined many young ladies over the years, and, swindled many a merchant of their goods.” Darcy stopped for a moment as he evaluated the young lady beside him. “Forgive me, Miss Elizabeth, I should not speak so boldly of such subjects. If you prefer me to refrain telling you the rest, I will do so.”

  “No, Sir, I believe that I need to know the rest of the story. I am just overwhelmed at the moment. If you would give me a moment to gather my wits about me, I will be able to hear the rest.”

  Darcy nodded. “Take as much time as you need, Miss Elizabeth.”

  Elizabeth took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. Darcy sat still, praying that she would allow him to finish what he had to tell her. After a few moments, Elizabeth nodded her head as she spoke. “I am ready for the rest of the tale.”

  Darcy turned away from Elizabeth as he took to his feet and began to pace in front of her. “Every once in a while, Wickham would show up on my door step and ask for more money. I knew that he was not studying at the university, and I knew whatever I gave him would be wasted on gambling and debauchery. I refused him several times. The last time, he swore that he would exact his revenge upon me for not coming to his aid. That was nearly six months ago. Just three months ago, he attempted to strike at me in the most painful of manners. My sister, Georgiana, is twelve years my junior. She is quite innocent and somewhat sheltered, though she learned a very hard lesson. Wickham found her as she was spending a holiday at Ramsgate. He pursued my sister, with the help of his friend, Georgiana’s companion. Between them, they convinced Georgiana that she was in love with Wickham and he begged her to elope with him. Fortunately, I arrived ahead of schedule and was able to thwart their plans. Wickham announced, in front of my devastated sister, that he had only wished to have my sister’s thirty thousand pound dowry.”

  When he looked at Elizabeth, he could see tears welling up in her eyes. “Forgive me, Miss Elizabeth, it is not the sort of subject that one speaks of with a gentlewoman. The reason I spoke of the matter is out of concern for you and your family. I do not wish to see you or your sisters become victims of the man.”

  “There is no need for forgiveness, Mr Darcy. You are correct in your thinking that my sisters and I needed to be protected from Mr Wickham. I must also admit that I noticed Mr Wickham was not all that he stated. I could tell that he was too willing to give information against you to people he had just barely met. I am ashamed at how easily I believed his words.”

  “It is easier to believe the words of someone who behaves with sweet manners than it is to believe someone who is reserved and cannot speak to strangers with comfort.”

  “I realize that I have disliked you since the night we met. After hearing your words that I was not handsome enough to tempt you to dance with me, my pride was wounded. I held that against you and believed words from another against you. I must beg your forgiveness for my judging you so harshly.”

  Darcy turned his head and walked a few steps away from where Elizabeth sat. “Those words
will haunt me to the day I die.” He said in a strangled whisper. Looking back at her, he continued. “Miss Elizabeth Bennet, I did not even look to see to whom Bingley was referring to. I was disturbed by his sister’s behavior and wished to be away from her. This put me into a foul mood. Had I known then that you had heard me, I would have asked your forgiveness immediately.”

  “This is too difficult for me to understand. Everything I believed from meeting you is now wrong. How could someone like you be attracted to me? I am nothing, a country gentleman’s daughter of no consequence, no dowry or connections to speak of.”

  “Miss Elizabeth, I have no need of a large dowry to consider when seeking a wife. I have no need of titles. Darcy is an old and well regarded name. I despise society functions as most are filled with women wishing to become my wife or men wishing to befriend me for financial gain. I desire a country life to town, being out on the land is far grander to me. I imagine you feel the same. The city does not afford one the opportunities to enjoy nature.”

  Elizabeth smiled. “Whenever I am in London visiting my aunt and uncle, I long for the park around my home. The view from Oakham Mount is far more appealing. I do enjoy the theater and concerts in Town.”

  “As do I, Miss Elizabeth. My sister and I have a box at the theater. When next we are in Town, perhaps you will accept my invitation to join us.”

  Blushing crimson, Elizabeth simply nodded. Darcy had another issue he wished to discuss. “I wonder if you will allow me to speak on another matter, one I consider to be important.”

  “Of course, Mr Darcy, as I do not fear any subject you might wish to speak of.”

  “When my friend, Mr Bingley, left Netherfield last year, I did not see much regard from your sister toward him. Now that I realize how wrong I have been on other subjects, I ask you to tell me whether your sister was being polite or did she have tender feelings for him?”

  “Jane is quite shy as you are, as she does not speak of her feelings to others. I know her well, as she is my closest friend, as well as a cherished sister. As to her feelings towards Mr Bingley, yes, Jane was very much in love with your friend and she was devastated when he left and Miss Bingley sent the letter to her.”