Southern Riders (Scars Book 1)

by Robin Edwards

  She must have regretted giving me her virginity, and I couldn’t really blame her for that. I imagined her reading all of the gossip stories about me online, realizing what a mistake she’d made. Just to see what she would find if she did go looking for info, I typed my name into the Google search bar. The results made me cringe. I scrolled through three pages of articles about me getting into brawls when I wasn’t philandering around the city, before deciding I’d seen enough. The images of me were even worse; I looked like a complete douchebag, with a slew of women around me in every picture.

  I definitely didn’t deserve the innocent woman I couldn’t get out of my head. She was so beautiful. I’d never even used that word to describe a woman before. I’ve had my fair share of cute girls, sexy ladies, and hot babes, but a beautiful woman was new to me. The more I thought of her, the more I knew she was better off without me.

  Just as I’d begun to work through my typical progressions regarding my mystery woman, the doorbell rang. I rarely had visitors to my penthouse, choosing instead to entertain at my condo downtown, since it was closer to the nightlife. But I’d spent the last week at my apartment since it was closer to the arena, and I was spending most of my time in physical therapy trying to get back in the rink. Besides, I hadn’t been drinking or partying much while rehabbing, so the party pad didn’t actually serve a purpose.

  I’d talked to Jeff earlier, and since he and his wife were going to be in the area, he asked if they could stop by. Of course, I welcomed him over, but probably not for the reason he thought. Usually, I’d want to drink and talk about my crazy party stories, but today was different. I needed some advice from my friend.

  “Hi, buddy!” I answered the door, instantly dropping to one knee to talk to Jeff’s son George, who was also my Godson. He’d recently turned four, and I loved when he would come to practices at the arena. He was so energetic and seemed to get smarter every time I saw him.

  “Hi, Bayden,” he squeaked through a smile before wrapping his little arms around my neck. George had a difficult time pronouncing my name when he was little, and because his blunder sounded so cute, we just let it stick. I carried him into the house while everyone else followed.

  “Well, hello to you too,” Amy teased, feeling a little ignored.

  “I’m sorry Amy. Hi!” I laughed as I hugged her. She was pushing a pink stroller. Peeking in, I could see that their daughter Victoria was asleep. I was a little disappointed because she didn’t come by the arena as often, so it had been a while since I last saw her.

  “I’m only teasing. I know you only care about the babies,” she joked before settling onto the sofa. Amy was the ideal wife in my eyes. She loved Jeff and supported his career while taking care of their children and home life. Jeff would always tell me how grateful he was to her for making his family life so calm and routine, which allowed him to focus on playing without any distractions. I always imagined how different his nights after games must be compared to mine, which usually involved late night binges at nightclubs and one-night stands.

  “That’s not true, but I do want to wake Victoria up,” I smiled innocently hoping she would allow me to disturb nap time.

  “She’ll be up in a second, trust me. She’s only asleep from the car ride, but it won’t last long,” she assured me while peeking into the stroller.

  “Okay, well that’ll give me just enough time to give you your present, buddy,” I said excitedly while rubbing George’s head, fluffing his soft blonde hair.

  “Pwesents? Is it my birthday?” George looked to Jeff eagerly, and we all laughed a little at his innocence.

  “No, buddy. Your Godfather just doesn’t understand what it means to be spoiled, so he buys you too many gifts,” Jeff said while smiling at me sarcastically. Obviously, George didn’t understand or care what was going on, he just wanted his present. So when I headed back towards my bedroom, he followed right behind me.

  When we re-emerged, I was holding a black plastic bag in one hand as I carried George in the other. He was leaning over trying to see what was in the bag, so I threw his little body over my shoulder, which he thought was hilarious. His loud laughter seemed to wake his sister, who began whining from her stroller.

  “There’s the princess,” Amy moved to get up from the sofa before Jeff stopped her.

  “I’ve got her babe,” he said after kissing her cheek and going to the stroller.

  I sat on the love seat across from Amy as I opened the bag and handed George the box. I could tell he had no idea what it was, so I opened the present, removing the contents as his eyes lit up.

  “Wow! You got me a car, Bayden?” He asked while kneeling down to touch the remote control car.

  “Yep, and you can drive it with this,” I explained while extending the remote control towards him. He slowly moved towards the remote as I pulled him onto my lap to show him how to work his new toy.

  “He’s too little for that, bro,” Jeff claimed while holding Victoria, who was now wide-awake, squirming to get down. The car moved behind the sofa and George leaped out of my lap to chase it now that he knew how to use the remote.

  “No, he’s not. Look at him! He’s got it all figured out. Plus the box said 5 plus, and my Godson is way more advanced than a 4-year old, so he’s got this,” I smiled towards Amy who was laughing at me and Jeff’s usual antics.

  Victoria was slowly making her way across the room towards me. She was so adorable in her frilly pink dress. She had just turned one, but Amy said she was too much of a diva to start walking, so she chose to crawl and scoot when she wasn’t being carried around. Just as she made her way to my feet, I went to pick her up before Jeff stopped me.

  “Wait, bro! Watch, she can pull herself up!” He said excitedly while glancing behind the sofa, checking on George who was still chasing his car. Just as Jeff predicted, Victoria gripped onto my jeans with her tiny fingers and pulled herself up onto unsteady feet. I acted as if she’d climbed Mt. Everest before lifting her up and kissing her cheek.

  “Be careful. She just ate, you don’t want to smell like baby puke,” Amy warned with a smile, but I didn’t care. When Amy first figured out George was a boy, I celebrated with Jeff thinking to have a son was the best thing ever, but from the moment I met Victoria I was wrapped around her tiny finger.

  “Okay, come on son,” Amy yelled towards the kitchen as she walked towards me. Victoria began squirming in my arms as she tried to make it to her mother, who was smiling and holding her arms out.

  “I’ll take them to the park so you two can hang,” she smiled towards Jeff as she took a squealing Victoria into her arms. You could tell Amy was a great mother, both of their children seemed to adore her and Jeff was George’s idol. We always joked that George learned to ice skate before he could walk because he was in the rink when he was a tiny thing.

  “Okay, babe. I’ll meet you down there, I won’t be long,” Jeff said before signaling to George who picked up his toy car and headed towards the door while Amy strapped Victoria into the stroller.

  “Take your time, baby. See you later, Bayden!” She teased as she headed towards the door. She had adopted my nickname since George gave it to me, it was an inside joke between us.

  Jeff helped Amy out before kneeling to remind George to behave himself while he was at the park. I smiled watching them all together. Jeff kissed Amy and whispered something in her ear that made her blush before she disappeared into my private elevator.

  “So what’s up in the bachelor world?” Jeff asked as he settled on the sofa across from me.

  “Same old, same old,” I feigned sadness as I walked towards the dry bar in the corner of my living room. Lifting a crystal bottle filled with whiskey, Jeff nodded and I poured a generous serving into two glasses before handing him one as I sat across from him, setting the decanter on the table between us.

  “I don’t know why you act like you even want to do that forever, bro. You know you don’t.” He smirked befo
re sipping his Whiskey.

  “What do you mean?” I asked, a little taken aback by his statement.

  “I mean, you love kids, you grew up in a loving family, you know you want that at some point. And I’m not sure if you know this, but you’re not twenty-one anymore,” he joked.

  “I don’t know that I want to be living the fast life forever, but can you seriously see me as a dad, Jeff?” I asked sarcastically before taking a large gulp of my drink.

  “Are you serious? I have to be careful how much I bring George around you because he might begin to think you’re cooler than me. You’ve got the dad role down, bro,” he frowned as if it was an accurate observation.

  “Yeah, but that only works with a great woman like Amy. While I can agree I’m good with kids, I think we can both agree I’m no good with the ladies.” I raised my glass before taking another sip while Jeff shook his head and finished his drink before refilling his drink.

  “I don’t know why you like presenting this image about yourself, but we both know it’s inaccurate,” he shrugged.

  “What’s incorrect?” I quizzed, my eyebrows furrowed in anticipation of his explanation.

  “This,” he thundered, pointing his finger as he moved his hand around my apartment before adding, “the whole bachelor ‘I don’t give a shit’ mentality you have going on. Bro, I know you want more. You can play that bullshit to everyone else, but I know you, Aiden.” I knew the liquor was kicking in because Jeff rarely cursed unless he was tipsy.

  He wasn’t wrong either. There was more to me than the bachelor bravado I let people see, but that had been my identity for so long it was just comfortable. People knew me as the guy who slept around, and although it got lonely at times, it was all I really knew.

  “I do not deny it, bro. I just don’t really know anything else. But to be honest, I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately,” I admitted before finishing off my drink and pouring another one.

  “All you’ve got to do is find the right girl. I know the interview process will be pretty time consuming since the applicants will be lined around the block,” he joked as he set his drink down, trying to pace himself.

  “I think I’ve found her, but I don’t believe she’s interested,” I quietly admitted, a little embarrassed.

  “What?! You’ve been dating, bro? I need my drink for this!” He quickly wrapped his fingers around the tumbler before taking another swig, looking at me expectantly as he awaited more information.

  “No, it’s the same girl. I haven’t seen her since the charity event, but I haven’t stopped thinking about her. She hasn’t reached out to me at all, and I’ve been looking for her message; nothing.” I took a large swig of my drink before looking to Jeff, who was frowning deeply.

  “You said you didn’t get her name, right? Did you give her yours?” He asked excitedly, but I just rolled my eyes.

  “Let’s be real, Jeff. What are the odds that she didn’t know who I was?” I asked, dismissing any subtlety. I’d considered the possibility that she could have no idea who I was, but despite how arrogant it sounded I found that option unbelievable.

  “Yeah, but you said she looked around 24. How many 24-year old virgins do you know?” He laughed before finishing off his second drink, and placing his hand over his glass, signaling he was done.

  I hadn’t really thought of it that way. I guess she was a pretty unique case. Everything about her was out of the ordinary, so I guess anything was possible.

  “I’ve thought of everything, man. I went looking through Facebook and Instagram. She seemed like a model, but she was too innocent for that. I bet she’s a teacher or something. She’s fucking beautiful,” I said more to myself than Jeff, but I could see the look of approval on his face as he watched me wonder about my mystery woman.

  “So you’ve been holding out all this time, waiting for your dream girl?” He looked at me astonished.

  “Don’t be crazy,” I chuckled after taking a sip of my drink before continuing, “I’ve had my regular routine, albeit a little slower than usual due to the injury. But the regular train of one-nights is still chugging along.”

  “Maybe you should actually look for her if she means that much to you,” he said in a concerned tone.

  “I’m telling you I have,” I explained, a little exasperated.

  “Yeah, but I’m talking about with a professional; like a private investigator. You’re filthy rich, bro, finding a girl can’t be that difficult.” He chuckled as he said the last sentence.

  “A private investigator? Really? ‘Yeah, I had a one-night stand and didn’t catch the woman’s name. She’s blonde and beautiful, here’s my black card.’” I joked, imagining what a conversation with a PI would sound like.

  “I’m sure they’ve had much stranger requests than that. Besides, what are your options? To just think about her forever? That doesn’t sound any better, bro. When was the last time you felt this strongly about a woman?” He asked and looked at me in a way that let me know his question wasn’t rhetorical.

  “Let me think,” I pretended to be in deep thought while tapping my chin with my index finger. “Oh, right. Never!” I exclaimed, and we both laughed.Cha

  “I’m just saying. It seems special, and I definitely don’t think you should just let it go.” He said while holding his hands up, silently asking me what I had to lose.

  “But what if it’s only sexual? What could I really have to offer her?” I inquired, realizing I’d never considered if I would make a good companion.

  “Are you serious, Aiden? Why do you think women throw themselves at you every day?” He frowned deeply, shocked by my question.

  “Uh, money,” I said flatly before finishing my drink.

  “Not the puck bunnies, bro. I’m talking about the women who are really interested in getting to know you. You know, the ones you don’t give the time of day? Don’t sell yourself short. You’re fun, you’re athletic, you come from a good family, and you look like a fucking model. I feel weird saying this, but you’re a catch, bro.” He smiled, and I began contemplating his hypothesis.

  Could I really have more of a connection with my mystery woman? In a way, I feared the connection and desire would fade if I ever saw her again. Maybe the inability to have her was what made her so desirable to me in the first place. She was the forbidden fruit, the unattainable beauty.

  The more I thought about finding her, the more ways I envisioned myself messing it up. She would probably be annoyed by my lifestyle. How could I maintain a relationship when I was in a different city every week for half of the year? No woman would be happy with that.

  I also couldn’t shake the feeling that she may not be interested in me, and even if I did find her, she would still reject me. I think that’s actually what I feared the most. The idea of putting myself out there, only for her to turn me down made the task seem impossible.

  “Don’t overthink it, bro. It’s just talking to a girl, that’s it,” Jeff said as if he could sense my fear.

  I chuckled as I thought of how childish it was for me to be so scared to reach out to a girl. In the back of my mind, I did think she would want me. I couldn’t convince myself that the way she looked at me didn’t mean anything. Her deep gaze haunted my dreams. She looked at me like she saw the real me, more than the superficial hockey star that everyone else saw. And when she smiled at me I felt like the luckiest man in the world.

  Sure the sexual chemistry between us was off the charts, but that didn’t necessarily mean we couldn’t add to it. I really did want to meet her and take her out on a date like a gentleman. Introduce her to my parents, the whole bit. But I couldn’t shake the fear that I’d ruin her. And the more I thought of that, the more I knew she was better off without me.

  Chapter Four

  EMILY

  I’d been lucky enough to land two new students for private gymnastics lessons, one of the first students I’d taken on had just been invited to the nation
al championships, and a local cheerleading team had approached me to work with them for tumbling at tournaments. Everything seemed to be shaping up professionally and then, just as work was going so well, I ran into a bad case of the flu.

  I’d been out of work for three days trying to nurse myself back to health, but nothing seemed to be working. My appetite was touch and go, and even when I could manage to eat, keeping it down was another challenge altogether.

  At least I had rid myself of the fever, which was the catalyst for me to take time off from work in the first place. The past two days had been more of a stomach sickness, although I did still feel sore and fatigued. I’d spoken with my doctor, and although she couldn’t fit me in for an appointment until the next day, she was pretty confident that I was just experiencing the mild flu, which was common, especially since I worked at a school. We had a running joke amongst the teachers, referring to the school as a petri dish, especially as seasons changed, which was when the students seemed to get sick more frequently.

  I’d just taken a long bath in my lavender oil when my doorman called to let me know the deliveryman was downstairs with the food I’d ordered. I gave him the go ahead to send the delivery upstairs while quickly slipping into my cozy pajamas. As much as I wanted to cook for myself, I just couldn’t find the energy, so I’d ordered tomato soup and crispy bread from my favorite diner.

  Just as I finished what I could manage eating without feeling nauseous, my phone vibrated. It was Mariah, who had been the best friend a girl could ask for, bringing me medicine as well as soup and ginger ale to help fight off the flu.

  “Best friend!” I chimed into the phone excitedly.

  “Hey, Bestie! How ya feeling?” She asked cheerily.

  “I think I’m getting better. I just had some soup, and I don’t feel ready to hurl, so that’s an improvement,” I joked.

  “Well, I’m glad to hear you’ve been eating,” she sighed into the phone. I could hear her clicking away on her keyboard in the background. I imagined her in her office handling a million other things, yet she still found time to check in on me. The thought made me feel really special. I knew that Mariah had been anxious when I couldn’t keep any food down, so I was happy to report I’d been doing better.