Always in Her Heart

by Marta Perry

  When the door had closed behind him, Link turned to Annie. “Try not to worry too much. If—”

  “Worry?” Annie’s voice rose, and she made an obvious effort to control herself. “Of course I’m worried. I’m also angry. How could you turn down Frank’s offer without even talking to me about it?”

  “You were already upset about his calling the board meeting. I thought it would just make things worse to know he felt that confident.”

  She was shaking her head before he finished saying the words. “That’s not why. You didn’t tell me because you’d already made the decision for both of us.”

  Her anger sparked his. “What did you expect me to do? Turn the company over to Frank without a fight?”

  “I expected you to consult me about something that affected Marcy’s future.”

  She wrapped her arms around the baby as if protecting the child from him. Marcy, apparently sensing that something was wrong, looked up, her small face puckering.

  How had things deteriorated between them so quickly? He tried for rationality. “Look, Annie, I was only trying to do what was best for everyone.”

  “And you were the one who got to decide what that best was.” Her face was pale and set.

  His determination hardened. “I knew what I had to do. I wasn’t giving up the company without a fight. I thought you understood what it means to me.”

  For an instant, Doc’s words from the day before echoed in his mind, and he pushed them away angrily. He wasn’t like Frank.

  “It means everything to you,” she said flatly, all the emotion wiped from her voice and her face. “I should have realized that, shouldn’t I?”

  “This isn’t just for me.” Why didn’t she see that? “This is for Davis, for Davis’s child. I owe him my loyalty.”

  He’d thought she couldn’t get any whiter, but she did. Her fingers were bloodless where they gripped each other around Marcy.

  “Loyalty,” she repeated. “Yes. Your loyalty was always to Davis and his family, wasn’t it.”

  Never to me. She didn’t say the words, but they echoed in the still air between them like a death knell.

  Annie held Marcy against her chest as they walked out of the office, the baby’s softness the only thing that kept her heart from breaking into pieces. It took a physical wrench to put Marcy into the stroller when they reached the sidewalk.

  Link reached for the stroller handle. She turned away, pushing the stroller quickly along the sidewalk until she reached the corner. She didn’t want him to touch the baby. She didn’t want him to touch her. The shield she’d always depended upon to protect her heart was completely gone now, leaving her vulnerable and exposed.

  The light changed, and they crossed to the square in silence. Her footsteps rustled through a path of fallen leaves, red and gold against the walk, a mute reminder of the time that had passed since they’d made this same trip a month ago.

  They probably looked the same to an observer. But they weren’t. Everything was different.

  She took a fractured breath, the pain heavy in her chest. She loved him. She’d lost him. She wouldn’t get over this so easily.

  They reached the courthouse steps. She lifted Marcy from the stroller, ignoring the hand Link reached out to help.

  Please, Lord. She tried to bring order to the chaos of her thoughts. Lord, help me. In a few minutes we’ll be in the hearing. They could take Marcy away from me. I have to get control of myself.

  She took a breath, then another. Chet held the door open for her, and she walked into the courthouse. All right. Slowly the pain receded to a dull throbbing. It would spring to life again later, and she’d have to deal with it then.

  Now, she needed all her strength to cope with the hearing.

  No, I need Your strength, Father. I don’t have enough of my own. I put Marcy in Your hands.

  Calmness settled over her. She would get through the hearing. Then, either way, she would get through the dissolution of the marriage that could never have been real, no matter how much she wanted it.

  They rode up in the elevator, still silent, still strangers. As they moved out into the upstairs hallway, she saw Mrs. Bradshaw waiting for them. The woman stepped forward, her stern face softening in a smile when she looked at Marcy.

  “The judge has asked me to watch Marcy during the hearing.” She held out her hands. “Don’t worry. I’ll take good care of her.”

  Annie could almost imagine that was compassion in the woman’s voice. Fear settled into her heart. Was Mrs. Bradshaw compassionate because she knew that her report had gone against them?

  It took every bit of control she could muster to kiss Marcy and hand her to the social worker. Marcy, sensing tension, tried to cling to her.

  “It’s all right, sweetheart. You remember Mrs. Bradshaw. She’s going to play with you for a bit.”

  Mollified, Marcy let herself be passed over. The woman nodded, then carried the baby quickly into a nearby room. The sound of the door closing was like a blow to Annie’s heart.

  “It’s all right.” Link repeated her words. “You’ll have her back again before you know it.”

  She nodded. Her lips were too stiff to manage a smile. She turned to Chet. “I need a few minutes before we go in.”

  He glanced at his watch. “Go ahead. There’s a women’s lounge around the corner.”

  She walked quickly away, needing to be out of Link’s sight for a few minutes at least. Her footsteps echoed on the tile floor.

  She rounded the corner and nearly walked into Frank. Before she could turn away, he took her arm.

  “You’re just the person I wanted to see. I’d like a word before we go in.”

  “I don’t think there’s anything we have to say to each other.” She tried to pull her arm free, but his grip held her in place.

  “Oh, but there is.” He smiled.

  Frank smiles and smiles, and all the while… Fear shot through her.

  She forced it away. That was ridiculous. What could Frank possibly do to her in a public place, with Link right around the corner?

  She tried for a reasonable tone. “I’m sure we should let our lawyers do the talking for us. The judge will decide what’s best.”

  “Wouldn’t you rather settle this between us?”

  It was an echo of Frank’s offer to Link. All her defenses went up.

  “I don’t see how that’s possible.” She tried to free her arm. Why didn’t someone else come along this end of the hallway?

  “It’s perfectly possible. Even easy. All I want is the company. I’m sure you know that.”

  “Yes.” Her anger sparked. “It’s too bad the judge can’t hear you say so.”

  “You know I wouldn’t be foolish enough to say this where anyone else would hear. Now, you’re a bright young woman.” For an instant his face darkened. “Bright enough to ferret out the truth about the loan payment, I imagine. I don’t think Link did that on his own.”

  “You’re not giving him enough credit.” Even after what Link had done, she was still defending him.

  He dismissed Link with a wave of his hand. “He doesn’t matter. I’m making this offer to you. You make sure I get the company, and I’ll guarantee you get custody of Marcy. Simple as that.”

  “It’s too late. There’s nothing I can do to make that happen.”

  “Of course there is. All you have to do is go into the hearing and admit to the judge that your marriage is a sham. That you only married Link to get custody of Marcy and control of the company. That’s all.”

  She could only stare at him. “You must think I’m crazy. If I did that, the judge would grant custody to you.”

  “And as soon as Marcy’s shares are in my hands, we’ll turn her over to you. You can raise her as you see fit. We won’t interfere, as long as I control her shares.”

  “You’re asking me to trust you’d keep your end of the bargain. Why would I?” It was ridiculous even to be having this conversation. And yet she couldn�
��t seem to stop her mind from looking at the possibility.

  “Surely you don’t think Julia and I really want to raise a child, do you? It was all I could do to convince Julia to pretend for a month. This way, we each get what we want. Everybody’s happy.”

  “Everybody but Link.”

  “Link will survive. He’ll still have his share of the company. He’ll just have to report to me.” Frank released her arm. “Think about it, but think fast. Once you’ve testified, the chance will be gone.”

  Once more, Annie found herself seated in the judge’s chambers with Link on one side of her and Chet on the other. Once more, Judge Carstairs sat behind the massive mahogany desk. The huge desk might have been expected to dominate the book-lined room, but it didn’t. Judge Carstairs did.

  “All right, let’s get started.” The judge glanced at them. “We’re keeping this informal, as I said. No one outside this room needs to know what happens here.”

  Annie was already cold, and the ominous words seemed to freeze her into immobility. She wanted to look at Link but she couldn’t. He might see the temptation to betray him in her eyes.

  He betrayed you, didn’t he? The voice of temptation was soft in her ear. If you play it safe, go along with Frank, you’ll get Marcy. That’s the only important thing.

  If she did that, how would she live with herself? If she lost Marcy—

  No, that didn’t bear thinking about.

  Please, Lord. Panic filled her mind, disrupting the prayer.

  “I already have the social worker’s report.” The judge lifted a manila folder from the desk blotter.

  She raised her hand, seeming to silence a protest Frank’s attorney was about to make. Annie felt Chet move slightly, as if he’d thought of speaking and changed his mind.

  “I want to hear from all the participants, telling me in their own words why this little girl should be given into their care. The attorneys for each side can ask any questions that are pertinent.” She glanced down at the report, then looked at Frank. “We’ll begin with Mr. Lester.”

  An invisible hand tightened around Annie’s throat. Was she beginning with the Lesters because the social worker had recommended them?

  Frank looked startled, but seemed to regain his balance as he stood to be sworn in, then resumed his seat next to Julia. The judge nodded to him encouragingly.

  “Well, Your Honor, the baby’s father was my cousin. We grew up together here in Lakeview. I’m a member of the board of his company. My wife and I have been married for eight years, we’re lifelong residents of Lakeview, and we’re fully prepared to provide Marcy with a stable, loving home.”

  Liar. All you want is the company.

  If only the judge had seen and heard what she had. But there was no way of proving anything. Chet had made it clear they could make no accusations they couldn’t prove.

  “Mrs. Lester?”

  Then Julia was speaking, talking about how she’d always loved Marcy and what pleasure she’d taken in setting up a nursery just for her.

  All the while she talked, Annie’s fears bounced around and around in her brain. Please, Lord. The prayer was desperate. Please show me what to do.

  “Mr. Longly, do you have any questions for either of the Lesters?”

  “No, Your Honor.”

  “Let’s go to Mrs. Morgan, then.”

  Suddenly she was being sworn in. Last chance. The words kept echoing in her mind. This is your last chance.

  Judge Carstairs was looking at her, waiting for her to begin. Annie could feel the intensity of Frank’s gaze on her face, as if he willed her to say what he wanted.

  She swallowed, trying to find her voice. “I love Marcy.” As soon as the words were out, her tight throat eased. “My sister and I were very close. I was there when Marcy was born—I was the first person to hold her after Davis and Becca. I’ve been taking care of her since Becca’s death, and I’m sure Becca would expect me to continue to do so.”

  She came to a halt, not sure she could say anything else. What else was there to say? She loved Marcy for herself, not for anything that came along with her.

  “Ms. Marshall?” The judge recognized the Lesters’ attorney.

  “I have a few questions for Mrs. Morgan, Your Honor.”

  The judge nodded.

  Annie braced herself. The woman was going to ask about their marriage. Frank was giving her the opportunity to take the deal he offered.

  “Mrs. Morgan, isn’t it a fact that you and Mr. Morgan only married in order to gain control of the child and her inheritance? Isn’t it true that the two of you have no feelings for each other, and that this is simply a marriage of convenience, undertaken to fool the court?”

  Chet was on his feet in an instant, objecting to the question, but Annie barely heard him.

  All she could really focus on was her own heart, and suddenly she could do so more clearly than she had in her entire life.

  She’d been telling herself that loving Marcy and being loved by the child was enough for her. But that was cheating. She’d longed all her life to be loved, but she’d never been willing to take the emotional risk needed to deserve it.

  “Mrs. Morgan?” Judge Carstairs prompted her. “Will you answer the question?”

  “Yes, Your Honor.” It was suddenly very clear. No matter what Link had done, no matter what the future held for them, all she could do was tell the truth.

  Father, give her the wisdom to see into my heart as clearly as You do.

  “It’s true that Link and I married when we did because it seemed best for Marcy.” She said the words slowly and clearly, knowing she was laying her heart out for all to see. “But that doesn’t mean we have no feelings for each other. I love my husband with all my heart.”

  There. It was done.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Link’s breath caught and his heart seemed to twist. Annie—his Annie—had sat there and told the world that she loved him. Through a tumult of emotions, he could barely hear Chet arguing something with the opposing attorney. He couldn’t seem to concentrate on that—on anything.

  One thing stood clear in his mind. Annie wouldn’t lie. She was telling the truth. She loved him.

  Exultation swept through him, closely followed by a hard sock of reality. Annie might love him, but she still faulted him for making that decision without talking to her. She thought that meant his loyalty wasn’t to her.

  All of a sudden the answer that had always seemed right—that he’d done what he thought was best for all of them—didn’t sound so right anymore. What had been so important that he had to make that decision without her?

  He knew the answer to that. The company. He hadn’t even considered the possibility of doing something that would affect his stake in the company.

  Doc’s words, when he’d talked about Frank, echoed in his mind again. Doc had held a mirror up to Link without even knowing it. In that mirror, Link saw a man consumed with the facade marked “acceptance” and “success.”

  It was time to call a halt to that. If God looked at his heart, he didn’t want Him to find a hollow shell.

  Annie had just done the hardest thing in the world for her to do. She’d opened her arms and taken the risk of offering love with no certainty that her gift would be welcomed.

  If only he could talk to her—but he couldn’t. Already he was being sworn in. All he could do was reach out and take her hand, not sure whether he was offering strength or asking for it.

  “Would you like to say a few words, Mr. Morgan?”

  “Yes, Your Honor.”

  Annie had been willing to sacrifice her vulnerable heart. He knew what he had to sacrifice to make this right.

  He cleared his throat. “Your Honor, I still believe what I said the first time we met here. My wife loves Marcy more than anything. She’s the best person to have custody of this little girl.”

  He glanced at Frank, trying to overcome his dislike. “I realize that Frank, as Davis’s cousin, feels that
he has a claim on the child, too.” He felt Annie’s hand jerk in his. “So I’d like to propose a compromise.”

  He looked at Annie, hoping that she could read the love in his eyes. “I haven’t had a chance to talk this over with my wife, and I’m sorry about that.”

  Annie squeezed his hand, as if encouraging him.

  “What is this compromise, Mr. Morgan?” Judge Carstairs studied him, her expression giving nothing away.

  He took a breath and murmured a silent prayer that he was doing the right thing. Frank only wanted the company, not Marcy. If given a piece of it, he might be content to leave Marcy alone.

  “I’d like to propose that Annie be granted custody of Marcy, and that Frank Lester be named as a trustee, with Doc Adams, to control her share of the company until she is of age.” Doc Adams would protect Marcy’s interests, and maybe that was the best he could hope for.

  In the silence that followed, all he could hear was the sound of Annie’s indrawn breath and the beating of his own heart.

  Annie tried to get her mind around Link’s words, and she couldn’t quite manage.

  She thought several people started to speak at once, but all she clearly heard was the sound of crying. Marcy was crying.

  Annie turned, half rising, to see the door to the judge’s chambers open. Mrs. Bradshaw came in, carrying Marcy.

  The woman murmured something that might have been an apology. She put the baby down.

  “Nan!” Marcy toddled unerringly right into Annie’s arms.

  Annie lifted her, holding her close, murmuring softly. Link’s arms were around the baby, too, his hand gentle on her back.

  “Hush, sweetheart, it’s all right.” He stroked Marcy’s blond curls. “Link and Nan are right here.”

  Marcy’s tears vanished. She squirmed to a sitting position on Annie’s lap, tilting her head back to give Link a ravishing smile.

  “Here,” she said proudly.

  “Your Honor, this is unfair.” The Lesters’ attorney shot to her feet. “Mrs. Bradshaw’s actions in bringing the child in could prejudice your decision.”