Unwrapping Her Italian Doc
Page 11
She was done.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
‘WHAT HAPPENED?’ EMILY asked, when Louise returned a couple of hours later to the ward.
‘Sorry, I just got waylaid.’
‘Louise?’
‘I’m fine.’
‘You’ve been crying.’
‘There’s nothing wrong.’
‘Louise?’ Emily frowned when she saw Louise’s smile was wavering as she took Emily’s blood pressure. ‘What’s going on? Look, I’m bored out of my mind. I mean, I am so seriously bored and I’m fed up with people thinking I can’t have a normal conversation, or that they only tell me nice things.’ Emily was truly concerned because she hadn’t seen red eyes on Louise in a very long time. ‘Wesley isn’t contacting you again?’
‘No, no.’ Louise sat down on the bed, even though Brenda might tell her off.
‘Tell me.’ Emily took her hand.
‘Anton.’ Louise gulped. Certainly she wasn’t going to scare Emily and tell her all that had gone on with Felicity’s baby but they really were speaking as friends.
‘Okay.’
‘Personal or professional?’
‘Both,’ Louise admitted. ‘He checks and double-checks everything, you know what he’s like …’
‘I do,’ Emily said.
‘It’s like he doesn’t trust any of the staff but he does it more with me.’
‘Louise.’ Emily didn’t know whether she should say anything but it was pretty much common knowledge what had happened a few months ago. ‘Remember when Gina had her meltdown and went into rehab?’
‘Yep, I know, Hugh reported her …’ Louise looked at Emily, remembering that there had been more than one complaint, or so the rumours went. ‘Did Anton report her as well?’
‘I’m saying nothing.’
‘Okay.’ Louise squeezed her hand in gratitude as Emily spoke on.
‘So maybe he feels he has reason to be checking things.’
‘Hugh doesn’t, though,’ Louise pointed out. ‘Hugh isn’t constantly looking over the nursing staff’s shoulders and assuming the worst.’
‘I know.’ Emily sighed. She adored Anton but had noticed that he was dismissive of the nurses’ findings and she could well understand that things might have come to a head. ‘So, what’s the personal stuff?’
‘Do you really need to know that your obstetrician got off with your midwife?’
‘Ooh.’ Emily gave a delighted smile. ‘I think I did really need to know that.’
‘Well, it won’t be happening again,’ Louise said. ‘We just had the most terrible row, or rather I did …’
‘And what did Anton do?’ Emily gently enquired.
‘He apologised,’ Louise said, and then she frowned because she wasn’t very used to a guy backing down. For too long it had been the other way around. ‘Emily …’ Louise’s eyes filled with tears. ‘I shouted for him to get off me and the poor guy was just standing there.’
‘Oh, Louise …’ Emily rubbed Louise’s shoulder. ‘It must have been terrifying for you to have a big row. Rows are normal, though. What happened to you wasn’t.’
‘I know.’ Louise blew her nose and recovered herself and gave Emily a smile. ‘I really let rip.’ Louise let out a small shocked laugh.
‘She really did!’ Anton was at the door and came over to the bed. ‘Your latest ultrasound is back. All looks well, there is a nice amount of fluid.’ He had a feel of Emily’s stomach.
‘Nice size,’ Anton said.
‘Really?’
‘Really.’ Anton nodded. ‘Now is the time they start to plump up and your baby certainly is.’
They headed out of Emily’s room and he turned to Louise. ‘What is her blood pressure?’
‘Ha-ha,’ Louise said. ‘Check it yourself.’
Anton gave a wry smile as Louise flounced off but it faded when he saw she went straight up to Brenda.
Louise hadn’t been lying when she had said she didn’t know when she’d be going home.
Something, something had told her she’d be around for the delivery, which meant she wanted to be around when Felicity was more properly awake, and at four she sat holding a big fat baby who had given everyone a horrible scare.
‘Your husband just called and he’s at Heathrow and is on his way,’ Louise said. ‘And your mum is on her way too.’ Felicity smiled. ‘And you have the cutest, most gorgeous baby. In fact, he’s so cute I don’t think I can hand him over …’
Felicity smiled as Louise did just that and placed the baby in her arms.
‘He’s gorgeous.’
‘I was so scared.’
‘I know you were but, honestly, he gave us a fright but he’s fine.’ She stared at the baby, who was gnawing at his wrist. ‘He’s beautiful and he’s also starving,’ Louise said.
‘Can I feed him?’
‘You can,’ Louise said, ‘because he’s trying to find mine and I’ve told him I’ve got nothing …’ She looked up as Anton came in and then got back to work, helping a very hungry baby latch on.
‘Louise, can I have a word before you leave?’ Anton asked.
Louise’s response was a casual ‘Sure’, but Anton knew that was for the sake of the patient.
‘Felicity,’ Anton said. ‘Your mother has just arrived …’
‘Do you want me to tell her to wait while you feed?’ Louise checked, but Felicity shook her head.
‘No, let her in.’
Louise stayed for the first feed. She just loved that part and then when finally the baby was fed and content and in his little isolette she gave Felicity a cuddle. ‘I’ll come by tomorrow and we’ll talk more about what happened today, if you want to. I took some photos with your phone, if you want to have a look through them with me.’
‘Thank you.’
She popped in to see Emily on her way out, as she always did, but she was just about all smiled out. She just wanted to go home for a good cry, a glass of wine and then bed.
She didn’t even pretend to smile when she knocked on Anton’s office door and went in.
‘Can we talk?’
Louise shook her head. ‘I don’t want to talk to you, Anton,’ Louise said. ‘I’m tired. I just want to go home.’
‘Louise, what happened today was not about you. I had an incident in Milan …’
‘I don’t want to hear it, Anton,’ Louise said, and then relented. ‘Imelda’s, then,’ Louise said. ‘I’m just going to get changed.’
‘Sure.’
‘I’ll meet you over there.’
There was Anton with his sparkling water but there was a glass of wine and some nachos waiting for Louise. Really, she shouldn’t because she had the bloody photo shoot in less than a week but Louise shovelled them in her mouth, getting hungrier with each mouthful.
‘Do you want to get something else?’
‘These are fine,’ Louise said, and then looked at him. ‘Well?’
‘I am so very sorry for today. You did everything right, from ringing Theatre to keeping her on the bed. She was very lucky to have you on duty and I apologise for jumping to the worst conclusion.’
Louise gave a tight shrug. It wasn’t just today she was upset about. ‘What about the other days?’ she challenged. ‘I don’t think you trust me.’
‘No.’ Anton shook his head. ‘That is not the case.’
‘It’s very much the case,’ Louise said. ‘Everything I do you double-check, or you simply dismiss my findings … Aside from the repeated wallops to my ego, it’s surely doubling up for the patient.’ Louise let out a breath. ‘So what happened in Milan?’
‘A few years ago, on Christmas morning, I took a handover, and I was told everything was fine, but by lunchtime I had a baby dead—’ Louise was about to say something but Anton spoke over her. ‘It was the hospital’s fault,’ Anton said. ‘Apparently the night midwife had told a junior doctor she had concerns; I took the handover from the registrar and those concerns hadn’t been passed on to her. I
t was just complete miscommunication. I went in to see my patient at ten, and there were many things that I should have been paged about but hadn’t been. I took her straight to Theatre and delivered the baby but he only lived for a couple of hours.
‘The coroner did not blame me, thank God, but I have never seen friendships fall so rapidly. There was blame, accusations, it was hell. So much so that when the finding came in I no longer trusted anyone I worked with, and I knew I had to make a fresh start, which was why I moved into fertility.’
‘But you came back.’
‘Yes, I never thought I would but the last months I was there, the parents of Alberto, the baby who had died, came in to try for another baby. It was a shock to us all. I offered to step aside but by then I had quite a good reputation and they asked that I remain. I was very happy when they got pregnant and it was then that I realised how much I had missed obstetrics. I knew I needed a fresh start so I applied to come here. I had always had a good rapport with colleagues until Alberto’s death. I wanted to get that back and I tried, but within a few weeks of being here there was an incident … He looked at Louise and she was glad that Emily had filled her in about Gina because Anton didn’t. ‘I’m not giving specifics but it shook me and from that point I have been cautious …’
‘To the extreme,’ Louise said.
‘Yes.’
‘Terrible things happen, Anton. Terrible, terrible things …’
‘I know that. I just wish I had not taken a handover that morning and had checked myself …’
‘You can’t check everyone, you can’t follow everyone around.’
‘I’m aware of that.’
‘Yet you do.’
‘I’ve spoken to Brenda and I have told her what went on, not just today but in the past. I also told her that I am hoping things will be different in the future.’
‘Did you get her “There’s no I in team” lecture?’ Louise asked, and Anton smiled and nodded.
‘I’ve had it a few times from Brenda already and, yes, I got it again today.’
‘Well, I disagree with her,’ Louise said. ‘There should be an I in team. I am responsible, I am capable, I know I’ve got this, and if I stuff up then I take responsibility. If we all do that, which we seem to do where I work, then teams do well. We look out for each other,’ Louise said. ‘We have a buddy system. I don’t just glance at CTGs when they’re given to me and neither do my colleagues. We take ages discussing them, going over them …’
‘I know that.’
‘It doesn’t feel like it,’ Louise said.
‘I am hoping things will be different now.’
‘Good,’ Louise said. ‘Is that it?’
‘No, I want to know what you meant about me judging you on your morals.’
‘This isn’t a social get-together, Anton. I’m here to talk about work.’
‘Louise.’
‘Okay, just because I’m not on a husband hunt, just because I fancied you …’
‘Past tense?’
‘Oh, it is so past tense,’ Louise said. ‘So very past tense.’
‘Louise,’ Anton said, and she must have heard the tentative tone to his voice because immediately her eyes darted away, even before his question was voiced. ‘What happened that made you so scared back there?’
‘That isn’t about work either.’ She got up and hoisted up her bag. ‘I’m sorry you went through crap and I’m so sorry for the baby and its family.’
‘Louise.’ He halted her as she went to go. ‘The midwife on that morning, I was going out with her. She was busy, meant to go back and check, meant to call, but got waylaid. Can you see why I was very reluctant to get involved with you?’
‘I can.’ She stood there but didn’t give him the answer he was hoping for. ‘Well, at least you don’t have that problem with me now—we’re no longer involved.’ She gave him a tight smile. ‘Goodnight, Anton.’
Louise got home, closed the door and promptly burst into tears. Despite her tough talk with Anton she could think of nothing worse than losing a baby under those circumstances and at Christmas too.
Then she went into the bath and cried some more. She’d been raging at him and he’d simply stood there.
She was beyond confused and all churned up from her loss of control.
Why couldn’t it just be sex? Louise thought. Why did she have to really, really like him?
As she got out of the bath her phone bleeped a text from Emily.
U OK?
Louise gave a rapid reply.
Bloody men! How’s baby?
Kick-kicking, or maybe he’s waving to you.
Louise sent back a smiley face, knowing what was to come.
Maybe SHE’S waving???? Emily texted, hoping that Louise would give her a clue.
Not telling, came Louise’s reply. Ask Hugh.
He won’t tell me, Emily replied. Bloody men!
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
ANTON REALLY DID make an effort at work, though Louise wasn’t sure if it was temporary. At least he had stopped double-checking everything that she did. Brenda had a word with some of the staff, as Anton had asked her to do. They in turn rang him a little sooner than usual with concerns, and slowly the I in team was working, except Louise was no longer a part of his team.
‘Phone for you, Louise,’ someone called, and Louise headed out to the desk. It was the IVF clinic, which had been unable to reach her on her mobile or at home, and Louise took out her phone and saw that the battery was flat.
‘Are you okay to talk, or do you want to call us back?’
‘No, now’s fine,’ Louise said.
‘Richard wanted to let you know that your iron levels are now normal but to keep taking the supplements, especially the folic acid.’
‘I shall. Thank you,’ Louise said.
‘Have a lovely Christmas and we’ll see you in the new year.’
Louise’s stomach was all aflutter as she ended the call.
‘Good news?’ Brenda asked, but Louise didn’t answer. Her lovely Christmas was walking past and this time when he sat down and ignored her it was at Louise’s request.
Of course, she still dealt with his patients—after all, Emily was one of them—but the distance she had asked for was there. As far as was reasonable she was allocated other patients and when they spoke it was only about work.
‘Can you buddy this?’ Beth asked, and Louise nodded and sat down. ‘What are you working over Christmas?’ Beth asked.
‘Tomorrow’s my last shift,’ Louise said, ‘and then I’m off till after New Year.’
‘Lucky you!’
‘I know.’ Louise smiled. ‘I can’t wait.’
She lied.
They looked at the CTG together and Anton could hear them discussing it, Louise asking a couple of questions before they both signed off on it.
What a mistrusting fool he had been.
He had never worked anywhere better than here. The diligence, the care, was second to none but he’d realised it all too late.
‘Do you need anything, Anton?’ Beth asked, as Anton signed off on a few prescriptions and then stood.
‘Nope, I’m heading home. Goodnight, everyone.’
When Anton stepped into his apartment a little later he felt like ripping the bloody tinsel down, yet he left it.
Louise had been in his apartment for three nights in total yet she was everywhere.
From lipstick on the towels and sheets to long blonde hairs in his comb.
Even the bed smelt of her perfume and Anton woke to his phone buzzing at three-thirty a.m. and, for a second, so consuming was her scent he actually thought she was in bed beside him.
Instead, it was the ward with news about Emily.
‘I’m so sorry …’ Emily said, as Anton came into the room at four a.m.
‘No apologies,’ Anton said, taking off his jacket, and then smiled at Evie, who had set up for Anton to examine Emily.
‘I thought I’d wet myself,’ Emi
ly said. ‘Maybe I did …’
‘It is amniotic fluid,’ Anton said, taking a swab. ‘Your waters are leaking. We will get this swab checked for any signs of infection and keep a close eye on your temperature.’
‘How long can I go with a leak?’
‘Variable. Do you have any discomfort?’
‘My back aches,’ Emily said, ‘but I’m not sure if that’s from being in bed …’
‘Have you told Hugh?’
‘Not yet,’ Emily said. ‘He was paged at midnight and he’s in Theatre. He’ll find out soon enough.’
When Louise came on for her shift she saw Anton sitting at the desk and duly ignored him. She headed around to the kitchen and made herself a cup of tea, trying to ignore the scent and feel of him when he walked into the kitchen behind her.
‘Emily’s waters are leaking,’ Anton said. ‘I just thought I’d tell you now, rather than you hear it during handover.’
Louise turned round.
‘I’ve ordered an ultrasound to check the amniotic levels and she is on antibiotics …’
‘But?’
‘Her back is hurting again. There are no contractions but her uterus is irritable.’
‘She’s going to have it.’
‘You don’t know that’s the case …’
‘I do know that this baby is coming soon,’ Louise said, and Anton nodded.
‘I don’t think she’ll hold off for much longer.’
Louise felt her eyes fill up when Anton spoke on.
‘I miss working with you, Louise.’
Louise didn’t say anything.
‘I miss you,’ Anton said.
She looked at him and, yes, she missed him too.
‘Can we start again?’ Anton said.
‘I don’t know.’
‘Louise, you seem to have it in your head that I’m controlling. I get that I have been at work, I still will be …’ He looked at her. ‘Do you know why I’ve been on water at all the parties over Christmas? It’s because I have Hazel who is due to deliver soon and I believe Emily will have that baby any day. I want to be there for them both. Yes, I am fully in control at work, and I get you have seen me at my worst here, but you know why now.’