Chasing the Horizon

by Scotty Cade

  Garner was lying back, still breathing hard, with his forearm resting over his forehead and a huge smile plastered on his handsome face.

  Hawk smiled in victory, slid over to Garner’s side, and laid his head on Garner’s chest. Hawk could hear and feel Garner’s heart beating in double time and gave himself a secret “attaboy” for a job well done.

  Garner wrapped his arm over Hawk’s shoulder and squeezed. “You realize you’re going to pay for that, right?”

  “I hope so,” Hawk said without raising his head. “So, a little birdie told me I have a charter on Saturday.”

  “A little birdie, huh?”

  “Now who’s Hank?” Hawk asked. “Are he and Thompson the guys from Savannah you helped work out their issues?”

  “One and the same,” Garner replied. “You’ll really like them. They are such great guys. Because of the actions of others, they were cheated out of so many years together.”

  “That sucks,” Hawk said. “But from what you’ve told me, it appears they are on track now?”

  “Yeah, they’re real good.”

  “So,” Hawk said. “I gathered they’re arriving on Friday afternoon?”

  “And heading back on Monday morning,” Garner added.

  “That’s such a long trip for just a couple days.”

  “About ten hours each way. But that’s all the time they can spend away from the marina.” Garner rolled Hawk over and climbed on top of him.

  “Enough about my friends,” he said. He leaned forward and took one of Hawk’s nipple rings into his mouth and tugged on it fairly hard, causing a moan to escape Hawk’s lips. He released it and circled his tongue around and around the sensitive area, kissing his way up to Hawk’s neck. “I have some collecting to do,” he whispered, scooting down and disappearing under the sheet.

  “And I’m ready and willing to pay.”

  AFTER GARNER had collected on his debt, they’d both fallen asleep, wrapped in each other’s arms.

  Sometime later Garner woke and reached over and found the spot next to him was empty again. “Fuck,” he said under his breath, frowning while rolling over onto his back and staring at the ceiling.

  His frown quickly turned into a smile when he smelled something really good and heard noises coming out of the galley. He leaned up on one elbow and was about to get out of bed when Hawk walked in carrying two plates. “Hey, sleepyhead.”

  “Good morning again,” Garner said, unable to contain his smile. He glanced over at the clock. “Or should I say good afternoon?”

  Hawk shrugged. “I guess since it’s almost four o’clock, good afternoon would be more appropriate. I hope you’re hungry.”

  “Starved,” Garner replied, sitting up and propping his pillow behind his back. “What are we having?”

  “Broccoli and cheese omelets, country potatoes with olive oil and rosemary, crispy bacon, and dry toast, because you have no butter,” Hawk recited, looking down at the two plates.

  “Smells great,” Garner shared. “I’m impressed.”

  “I could have done a hell of a lot better, but”—Hawk handed him the plate—“I was pretty constrained by the contents of your refrigerator.”

  Garner chuckled. “I guess I need to hit the grocery store soon.”

  “That would have been yesterday,” Hawk said wryly, climbing into bed next to Garner. “Since it was so late, I skipped the coffee, but there’s juice on your bedside table.”

  Garner looked over to see a little glass of orange juice resting on top of a paper napkin. “When did you put that there?”

  “Just a few minutes before I brought the food in,” Hawk said. “You were sleeping like a babe.”

  “Sorry,” Garner said before taking a bite of his eggs and savoring the flavors. “Damn this is good,” he said with a mouth full of eggs.

  Hawk nodded.

  Garner swallowed and took a sip of his orange juice. “Where did you learn to cook like this?”

  “I was a private chef before I was a charter boat captain.”

  “Oh,” Garner said and then took a bite of his potatoes. “Professionally trained?”

  “Na, self-taught,” Hawk admitted. “My degree is in architectural design, but I much prefer cooking and captaining.”

  “There you go again with the contradictions.”

  “There you go again with the stereotyping,” Hawk responded.

  “Damn, I hate it when you’re right. But hey, promise me something,” Garner asked. Hawk nodded. “As soon as I fuck whatever this is up royally and you can’t stand the sight of me, please say you’ll still cook for me.”

  “I’d promise that,” Hawk said. “But remember… when things head south, you head south. Get it? That’s a play on words.”

  Garner rolled his eyes. “I got it. But who knows, with your intimacy issues, you’ll probably break it off first, and I won’t have to run.”

  “Ha! Ha!” Hawk said. “This just might turn into a race to see who can fuck it up sooner.”

  “All kidding aside,” Garner said. “What made you come back?”

  Hawk chewed on his food and then swallowed. “I just figured we’re both safe.”

  “How so?” Garner asked, holding a strip of bacon at his mouth.

  “The way I see it,” Hawk explained, “from the start, we’ve both made it perfectly clear that neither of us is looking for a relationship. As long as we both feel that way and don’t expect anything more from the other person, I don’t see any reason why we can’t have a little fun. Besides, I’d already broken my golden rule.”

  “Which is?”

  “I slept with you twice, and I never tap a guy more than once.”

  “Tap a guy,” Garner repeated. “What a lovely term.”

  Hawk shrugged, taking another bite of his food. “That’s the way I see it,” he said when he’d swallowed. “You good with that?”

  Garner nodded. “Yeah, I’m good with that. Especially since I get to stay in Key West. I mean… I’d hate to think I’d have to flee this place because you’ve gone and fallen head over heels in love with me.”

  “So now you can sleep peacefully at night knowing that will never, ever happen,” Hawk replied. “And by the way, sarcasm does not look good on you.”

  “I’ll remember that.” Garner wiped his plate with his last piece of toast. “But if I were you,” he added, waving the toast through the air, “I’d get used to it.”

  “I’ll remember that,” Hawk replied.

  “Good.”

  Garner stood with his empty plate, took Hawk’s, and headed to the galley.

  When he returned and slipped into bed next to Hawk, the man was lying on his back, hands behind his head and feet crossed at the ankles, staring up at the ceiling. “Penny for your thoughts?”

  “Oh hell no,” Hawk said, rolling his eyes. “You’re not getting me to talk about myself anymore. Especially now that I know you’re analyzing every word I say.”

  “Come on,” Garner begged. “What’s left to say? I already know all your shortcomings.”

  Hawk looked over at him with a serious look on his face. “Are you kidding me? You’ve only just begun to scratch the surface.”

  Garner reached over and laid a hand on Hawk’s chest. “All kidding aside, Hawk. Give yourself a break. Unlike me, you had no control over what happened to you before you were adopted.”

  “Wait. What do you mean unlike you?”

  “Unlike you, the issues with my family were a direct result of decisions I made on some conscious or unconscious level. It all started when my father was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. He was my idol, and looking back now, I think I started to distance myself from him so I wouldn’t have to watch him deteriorate to the point where I no longer knew him. I was a psychiatrist, remember?”

  Hawk nodded.

  “I knew exactly what to expect as his illness progressed. In other words, as you so plainly put it, I ran. And apparently I’ve been running ever since.”

&nb
sp; “I didn’t mean—” Hawk said.

  “No!” Garner said, stopping him midsentence. “You’re smart, Hawk. You have common sense, and you hit the nail on the head when you pointed out doctors are the worst patients. There’s a reason why doctors don’t treat themselves. Because they can’t. Throughout my career, after only one session, I could usually diagnose my patient’s issues. But after thirty-seven years, I still can’t see my own.”

  “But I really have no qualifications to analyze you,” Hawk admitted.

  “For someone with no qualifications, you got me pretty quick.”

  Hawk remained silent.

  “The events in your life, on the other hand, were by no actions of your own. It kills me as a psychiatrist to see what the actions of some parents do to their children.”

  Garner stood up and started pacing. “When I was still practicing, I had a patient named Jasen who was five years old. He was blind from birth and diagnosed with a shitload of emotional problems, all as a direct result of his mother using crack cocaine while she was pregnant. That child will struggle with his blindness and suffer emotional issues throughout his life, all because of a conscious decision his mother made to use drugs.”

  Garner sat back down on the bed and ran his fingers through his hair. “All of this was out of Jasen’s control, but yet he’s the one paying for it in the end. How does a person live with themselves?”

  Hawk rested his hand on Garner’s leg. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, Hawk! I’m the one who’s sorry,” Garner said, laying his hand on top of Hawk’s and looking him directly in the eye. “I own my shit. I caused it and I’ll deal with it. But your shit was a direct result of a decision someone else made. But like Jasen, you’re the one left to deal with the fallout.”

  “At least I see why you ran from your job,” Hawk said. “I can’t imagine dealing with that shit day in and day out. Especially the kids.”

  Garner took a deep breath. “How in the hell did we get from my asking you what you were thinking when I came back into the room to this? I haven’t thought about this stuff since I left my job.”

  Hawk sat up and crossed his legs in front of him and took both of Garner’s hands in his. “Maybe it’s been in the back of your mind, and it was something that needed to be acknowledged before you could deal with it and put it away.”

  Garner shook his head. “How did you get so smart?”

  “Don’t get too excited,” Hawk said through a smile. “After I was adopted, my parents sent me to therapy to make sure I was adjusting okay, and that was something I remember my therapist saying to me once.”

  “Thank you,” Garner said while leaning in and stealing a kiss. “For listening, that is.”

  “Anytime.”

  Garner looked over at the clock. “Hey. I don’t know if you have plans or not, but how about a shower and a sunset sail?”

  Hawk shrugged. “Sure, why not.”

  “Wait!” Garner said. “You never told me what you were thinking about.”

  Hawk smiled. “I was thinking about how I haven’t talked so much about myself in years.”

  Garner howled. “We’re a pair, aren’t we?”

  “Sure looks like it.”

  Garner squeezed Hawk’s hands. “You hit the shower, and I’ll check the weather report.”

  AS AQUATHERAPY motored around Sunset Key, Garner checked his anemometer. The wind was steady out of the south at about twelve knots. “Perfect,” he said. “You wanna take the helm while I raise the sails?”

  Hawk nodded and slipped behind the wheel.

  “Just hold her off the wind until I tell you,” Garner said as he cranked the winch and unfurled the bright white mainsail trimmed in a wide navy blue banding.

  When the main was completely unfurled, Garner nodded at Hawk. He turned the wheel and headed directly into the wind, and Garner heard that familiar woof as the wind quickly filled the sail. AquaTherapy heeled over in the water about ten degrees and steadied as she picked up speed. Garner moved to the next winch and cranked, the jib slowly unfurling and luffing loudly until Garner tightened the sheet and she filled up with wind as well. AquaTherapy heeled over another few degrees as Garner trimmed the sails, until she was tuned perfectly to the wind and slicing through the crystal clear water.

  “This is my favorite part,” Garner said as he cut the engine. “Listen to that.”

  Hawk smiled as he listened to absolutely nothing but the occasional whistle of the wind though the riggings.

  Hawk noticed that Garner seemed to be a different man on the water. Lighter somehow. The uptight vibe he gave off on land disappeared, along with the stress lines in his face. In fact, the expression on his face when he was unfurling the sails was almost giddy. He sat back and watched as Garner checked his surroundings, set the autopilot, and disappeared through the companionway door. He reappeared a few minutes later with two beers and a bag of potato chips. He handed a beer to Hawk and opened the chips, stuck his hand in the bag, and dropped it on the seat next to Hawk, keeping a hold of a handful of chips.

  “Appetizers,” Garner said through a smile. He looked up at the sky and took a deep breath, inhaling the rich salt air. “God, I love this.” He sat next to Hawk and rested an arm over his shoulder. “This is exactly what the doctor ordered.”

  Hawk smiled and held up his beer bottle. Garner tapped the neck of his bottle against Hawk’s, and they both took a pull.

  Garner pointed across the cockpit. “Would you look at that?”

  When Hawk turned, the sun had momentarily dropped behind a low-hanging cloud and the orange and red hues surrounded the entire cloud with rays of sun shooting out in every direction. For a split second Hawk thought that if he were a religious man, he might almost have to say a prayer or something. It was just that beautiful. But then just as quickly as it came, it disappeared as the sun started to peek out from the bottom of the cloud.

  As they silently watched the scene unfold before them, Mother Nature didn’t disappoint. The sky was filled with one spectacular moment after another until the fiery ball dropped below the horizon, leaving nothing but traces of orange, red, and fuchsia behind. With Garner’s arm still hanging comfortably over his shoulder, Hawk felt his chest tighten and the slightest wave of panic when he realized he felt truly content. Before he could overanalyze the feeling, his thoughts were interrupted by Garner’s voice. “Time to come about.”

  Pushing his feelings aside, he stood and saluted. “Awaiting my orders, Captain.”

  Garner laughed out loud. “You take the helm and I’ll man the winches.”

  “Wenches?” Hawk teased. “I didn’t know there were wenches on board.”

  “I said winches, you idiot. Now release the autopilot, turn her hard to port, and don’t forget to duck.”

  “Aye, aye, Captain,” Hawk shouted as he carried out his tasks.

  When the boat came about, the boom swung from starboard to port, and both men ducked as it passed over their heads. Wind filled the mainsail, and Garner loosened the starboard jib sheet while cranking the winch on the port side. The wind caught the large sail and nosily blew it to port as well. AquaTherapy heeled over once again and sliced through the glistening water.

  “Nice job,” Garner said. “I’m gonna make a sailor out of you yet.”

  “Not sure about that,” Hawk said. “I have a real need for speed, and I like my throttle too much.”

  Garner spun around and licked his lips. He grabbed a handful of Hawk’s crotch and shook it. “I like your throttle too.”

  “Really? Is that the best you can do?” Hawk asked, shaking his head. “Oh, dude, that was pretty lame.”

  “You think so? I thought it was pretty damn clever,” Garner replied. “You get it, right? Throttle.” He squeezed Hawk’s crotch again and then repeated the word while pointing to the throttle of his boat.

  Hawk flashed a grin and rolled his eyes. “Yes, I get it, and I still think it was lame.”

  Garner released Hawk
’s crotch and hung his head, looking up at Hawk through his eyelashes.

  “Stop with the puppy-dog eyes,” Hawk said. “Do I look like the kind of guy that would react to that?”

  Garner glanced up. “I have two words for you, Mr. Bristol: walking contradiction.”

  “Shit,” Hawk said, looking away quickly, unable to mask the smile that consumed his face.

  “What, no response?” Garner teased. “That’s because you know I’m right. And for the record, I’ll use my puppy-dog eyes any damn time I please.”

  Hawk figured he was catching Garner’s giddiness because he started laughing and didn’t stop until just before they entered the harbor.

  Hawk took the helm and started the engine while Garner manned the winches, furling the sails and preparing the lines for docking. As soon as they were inside the breakwater, Hawk surrendered the helm and walked out onto the bow. When they passed ReelCrazy on their approach to Garner’s slip, Hawk did a double take when he saw Justin sitting on the bow of his boat. Even from this distance, Hawk could see the all-knowing smile that was spread over Justin’s face, and he could feel the sarcasm oozing out of his deliberate wave. “Shit,” Hawk said under his breath. “I’m so busted.”

  Hawk watched Justin walk over to meet them at the dock, probably under the pretense of assisting them with the lines. “Hey, Butt-rah,” he said, winking at his best friend as they pulled into the slip.

  Justin smiled broadly as he caught the line Hawk threw him and secured it to the nearest cleat. Hawk jumped off the boat at midship and secured the spring lines and then the stern line until the boat was secure.

  Justin walked down the finger of the dock and stood next to Hawk.

  Garner shut down the engine and hopped off the boat. “Thanks for the help,” he said, obviously recognizing Justin as Hawk’s friend and extending his hand, “I’m Garner Holt.”

  Justin accepted the outreached hand. “Justin Morrison. Good to meet you.”

  “Hawk has mentioned you,” Garner said.

  “Has he now?” Justin asked, casting a sideward glance at Hawk and elbowing him in the ribs.