Innocence Lost

by Bradley Stoke

“You don’t have to spend more than a couple of hours in the studio. And it’ll be more than worth your while.”

  Innocence walked with Bouche into the town of Sauterelle, feeling really very embarrassed with her penis dangling between her legs. She hated the attention it attracted as she walked by - some of it shock, some of it persistent curiosity and some of it people simply turning their heads to have a second look. She felt she’d been right to keep her assets well-hidden and resolved to return to wearing her shorts when she’d left the commune to see the rest of Brook. It sometimes occurred to her that one of the other reasons she was attracting attention was because of the extreme shortness of her hair, which was still only a few days’ growth.

  The photographic studio was just above a shop in one of the main streets in Sauterelle and very well equipped in technical equipment. She didn’t know the names of even a fraction of the machines she could see but nonetheless they were very impressive. The photographer was a small gay man who wore a beret over his shoulder-length hair and had a ring pierced through the foreskin of his long thin penis. He had a curious habit of tweaking and stroking his penis as he spoke but it gave no sign of having an independent life.

  “So you’re Innocence,” the photographer smiled. “You even exceed the description Bouche gave me of you! I really must take advantage of your kind offer. I’ve already cancelled two other engagements. And if need be, I’ll cancel more.” He took Innocence’s balls in his hand and gently bounced them up and down as if weighing them. “And you’re so very beautiful!”

  The rest of the session took place in a room at the back involving a bewildering array of backdrops and in which countless lamps and cameras were pointed at Innocence. The pattern of each session was much the same - and the photographer insisted on several of these for which he offered ever more tempting sums of money. The photographer and Bouche chatted with Innocence on subjects of bizarre inconsequentiality, such as the weather, the football league or the design of a neighbour’s shop-front. All the time, Bouche would stroke her penis and occasionally take it into her mouth as if waiting for a time when it was ready. Then, as if an invisible and inaudible signal had been transmitted, Bouche would start getting more energetic with her fellatio and the photographer would move towards his cameras talking all the time, but interjecting his patter with comments such as “That’s right!”, “You’re doing fine!” and “It’s coming on now!” As this happened, Bouche’s skilled attention caused her penis to engorge to that almost bursting extent she’d succeeded in achieving at the commune.

  Then Bouche would disengage her mouth and hands from Innocence’s penis, but not her eyes, which she kept focused on Innocence’s eyes in a way that communicated love, concern and encouragement. Innocence could see Bouche’s value to the photographer as she stayed under the gaze of the photographer’s rapidly shuttering camera with an erect penis that seemed to have lost all memory of what it was like to be small. It stayed erect for what seemed like forever, while the photographer coaxed Innocence into different sitting and standing poses with a variety of backdrops he selected. Some of these backdrops featured bedrooms or other rooms in a house. Some of these were outside scenes of mountains, lakes or cities. Others were completely surreal - such as outer space, mythical countries or prehistoric environments. Sometimes Innocence would be asked to hold her penis forward in some triumphant pose. Sometimes to put a hand behind her stubbled head with a coy smile. Sometimes she was asked to put a finger in her anus and then to put it to her mouth or nose. Occasionally, Bouche would intervene to give Innocence’s penis a little stroke or even to put the glans in her mouth to keep her member in a sufficient state of excitement.

  The session would end, again decided by Bouche’s and the photographer’s experienced skill, with Bouche exciting Innocence’s penis exactly to the point of coming and then Bouche would disappear out of camera shot as Innocence masturbated off the drops of semen that she could squeeze out of her. At this stage the photographer would come very close to the top of Innocence’s penis to make sure of capturing the moment each stream of semen came free of her penis and spurt forth.

  After each session, Innocence felt no less exhausted than Bouche and the photographer seemed to be, and quite happily collapsed on the bed that was made available with Bouche on one side and the photographer on the other, who recommenced his comforting prattle. Innocence felt somehow better for attracting so much attention to her body, but also felt that this wasn’t an experience she’d like to repeat for a long time. Her balls ached in a curious way and there was a very strong and rich smell given off by her genitals.

  However, Innocence was delighted by the cash she received at the end of her day. It was far more than she’d expected and more than enough for her to leave the commune at Sauterelle and see Les Grandes Petites. That evening, when she headed back to her hammock at the commune after eating a hamburger and chips at a take-away, in preference to the lentil and bean mush she’d otherwise have to eat, she resolved to leave the following day unless Purity appeared.

  And as Purity was as far away as ever, Innocence found herself several days later walking up the mountain passes of Les Grandes Petites. It was wonderful to get away from people! exclaimed Innocence to herself. It was a warm day, but even so she could feel a little cool draught coming down from the snowy peaks. She wore only the boots she’d bought at a mountaineering shop at the nearest resort and the rucksack over her shoulders in which she kept her other clothes, a flask of coffee and some sandwiches. It was with relief about a half hour earlier that she’d decided she was sufficiently isolated from anyone’s curiosity to abandon the shorts she’d returned to wearing all the time since she’d left the commune at Sauterelle. It was curious to Innocence how her present nudity seemed to differ from that of the commune where it had almost been a religion rather than a preference. She wasn’t too sorry to leave the commune, its tasteless food and uncomfortable sleeping arrangements, its overwhelming smell of body odour and bad breath. But it was with sadness that she’d left Bouche and she hoped that when she’d return that Purity would be there.

  The mountains were beautiful. She always felt she was coming to the top of them but each time she reached the top of a ridge there was always another much larger one looming over it. Sometimes she paused and sat on the coarse grass which intermingled with her pubic hairs watching the view of Brook stretching out beneath her with the inhabitants looking like tiny insects and their towns like insect nests. Occasionally, she paused that little bit longer to eat a ration of sandwiches, to read her guide book or simply to lie on her back in the sun-warmed stubbly grass and allow the sun to bake her breasts and groin. Perhaps, she thought, I’ll lose all evidence of the whiteness that marks where I’ve worn my shorts.

  The guide book she had was one which Bouche had lent her and was written by someone who had an ideological perspective on everything. Innocence found it a bit annoying that there seemed to be nothing about Brook and its landscape that didn’t have a history of political struggle or a contemporary ideological resonance associated with it.

  After a while, Innocence reached the object of her walk, which was to reach the glacier that marked the lowest altitude at which she could expect to meet snow. She walked up to the glacier and then gingerly trod into the crunchy slightly thawing snow. She felt the coolness of it on her ankles just over her boots. Then suddenly, with a curious passion and impulsiveness she threw herself bodily into the white crisp snow so she could feel it against her skin. She luxuriated in the snow as she rolled around in it, dripped it over her breasts and packed it against her groin. Her penis responded to the cold by shrivelling to ever such a tiny size. She felt it with her fingers. It was curiously warm as a contrast to the ice in which it had been dripped. This contrast was enough to stimulate it and soon her penis was as large as it had previously been small and she started unselfconsciously masturbating with her knees sinking in the snow.

  Not totally unselfconsciously though, as she sudde
nly noticed someone also with extremely short hair watching her from a rock just to the edge of the glacier. At first Innocence thought this might be some kind of mirage and she was looking at a mirror reflection of herself, as women with such very short hair were rather unusual in Brook unless they were nuns. But this girl had a very skinny body with tiny breasts just like Bouche.

  “Don’t stop!” pleaded the girl when she noticed that Innocence had spotted her. “I’ve really enjoyed watching you! And you’ve got such a wonderful dick!”

  Well really! thought Innocence. She wasn’t masturbating for this woman’s pleasure. Crossly Innocence picked herself up and waded through the snow away from her partially melted patch towards where she’d left her rucksack.

  “Don’t go! Please!” pleaded the girl standing up.

  She, like Innocence, was wearing only boots and a rucksack, but there was a glimmer shining from her crotch and nipples that really didn’t seem very natural. Innocence paused briefly, but then continued. Why did her days of solitude have to be disturbed so?

  “You’re Innocence aren’t you?” shouted the girl. “I’ve heard so much about you!”

  Innocence started. How did this total stranger know her? Was it those photographs she’d had taken of her? Had her freakish fame spread so far? The girl ran towards her, and Innocence could see further glimmerings from the brilliant sun through the ice-blue sky reflecting from what she could now identify as body jewellery. And such a lot of it! Her ears seemed to be a mass of earrings. A ring through her nose. Great round rings through her nipples and a collection of shiny gold and silver metal attached around her groin. A woman clothed only in precious metal.

  “I’m a friend of Mouse’s!” announced the girl. “My name’s Dodie! I knew you were in Brook. Your sister told Mouse about you leaving. I never expected to see you though! And you do have the most wonderful prick!”

  Innocence stood by her rucksack on the grass looking bemusedly as Dodie herself stepped out of the snow and her brilliantly edged shadow obscured the few flowers surrounded by melted snow.

  “It’s beautiful! I must touch it!” gasped Dodie, coming to within feet of Innocence. Dodie reached out her hand and took the round mass of Innocence’s testicles in her palm. “It feels so firm and sure! You must be the luckiest girl in the world!”

  Innocence wasn’t sure that she felt like that, but she settled down in the grass next to Dodie and allowed her to put her arms around her and to caress her breasts and stimulate her penis. She’d had so many hands caress her that she somehow didn’t mind a couple more, even from someone who only knew her by report and whom she’d never heard of before.

  “You’ve got Cafard’s classic guidebook!” exclaimed Dodie, suddenly taking one hand off Innocence’s penis and reaching for the guidebook Bouche had lent her which was lying just by Innocence’s sandwiches. “How wonderful! And I didn’t know you were at all political! But then Mouse wouldn’t know would she!”

  Innocence reflected on the truth of that - Mouse hadn’t the slightest interest in political, social or ethical matters. However, Innocence wasn’t especially marked for her political interests either.

  “It’s not mine, I’m afraid! I’m borrowing it!”

  ”Don’t you find it puts Brook into perspective though?” remarked Dodie detaching her other hand from Innocence’s left breast and used it to support the book on her lap. Innocence felt slightly discarded by this sudden change of Dodie’s attention. Her attention was focused on the rings and studs embellishing Dodie’s groin and hidden tantalisingly within the bush of her pubic hair. “People think of Brook as just being some kind of naturist holiday resort. A place where you can take your clothes off and fuck in public. But it’s so much more than that! It’s a whole history of political struggle for freedom. A struggle to retain its own distinctive identity in an unsympathetic nation.”

  Innocence’s mind wandered as Dodie concentrated her thoughts on politics, and she let her gaze return to the hills. The political struggle wasn’t there at the moment, she thought. What there was was the swerve and sweep of swifts, the song of birds hidden in trees, the ticking of cicadas in the distance and the shadows of the mountains etched against the deep blue of the sky. She gradually became aware of hands attaching themselves to her thighs. She looked down to see Dodie, who had taken off her boots, kneeling in front of her, resting a hand on each of her thighs, looking imploringly up at her.

  “May I?” Dodie asked in a curiously submerged voice glancing pointedly at Innocence’s penis. Innocence nodded. She stayed transfixed by the view while Dodie’s mouth engaged itself on Innocence’s penis with a passion that she’d not experienced since she’d last made love to Mouse. Dodie wasn’t as technically proficient at fellatio as Bouche, but there was no doubting her passion or the joy in which she licked up the semen that eventually came pumping forth and threatened to stain the scenery.

  IX

  In Which Innocence is restored to Purity; the beauty of Innocence is immortalised on film and Purity and Innocence are exposed to the virtues of great wealth and proportion.

  Dodie and Innocence were staying at different resorts on opposite sides of the mountain where they met, so, despite Dodie’s entreaties that they stay together and further what she said was potentially a beautiful relationship, Innocence returned to her hotel room to spend a few more uneventful days in the shadows of Les Grandes Petites. She soon felt the need to return to the vegan commune in the hope that Purity would have returned. The thought of being with Purity once more filled Innocence with a warmth of expectation and desire.

  When she returned, she carefully removed her clothes before coming within sight of the commune as she didn’t wish to attract the approbation of the more fundamentalist commune members, although she was aware that the stares she got were no less pronounced than before. She felt nervous as she walked towards the main farmhouse, her penis shrivelled from anxiety and aware that although her hair had grown to nearly a centimetre in length it was still very short in the eyes of her company. She was delighted, though, when Purity hurried towards her smiling with her arms outstretched. In less than no time Purity’s arms were around Innocence’s naked body and they were kissing each other full and long.

  “I’m so pleased you came here!” Purity exclaimed. She ran a hand down Innocence’s stomach from the hollowed recess of her navel, over the flatness of her stomach and to her penis. “And you can see that you have nothing to fear of being naked here! Isn’t it so much nicer?”

  Innocence let her eyes drop down to her waist where the whiteness of her skin around the groin clashed determinedly against the opaqueness of Purity’s skin. She was very conscious of the lack of sun she’d allowed against her lower body and how untanned she seemed in contrast to the others.

  Innocence enjoyed her stay at the commune much more now that Purity was there to share it with her. She and Purity slept in the same room and the same bed in the commune. At first she was alarmed that she would have to share the bed with two others: a fat woman with an unfortunate propensity to fart and belch for which she never apologised nor gave any warning, and a very skinny man with a very thin penis and a wispy apology for a beard.

  Innocence soon found out more about the sexual ethics of the commune which she found she was expected to participate in. This was principally that one would never have exclusive partners - this was considered a great vice leading to jealousy and selfishness. And also one had to be very open about one’s sexual behaviour and pay no attention to anyone else’s presence when making love. This meant that at any moment and at any time Innocence would stumble across two or more people making love with each other making no allowance for the nuisance the flailing of their limbs or their ecstatic gasps would make. Another feature of the sexual ethics was that there was apparently no concept of aesthetic choice in whom one made love with - and most certainly gender, race and age were not to be used as grounds of discrimination either.

  As a result, she often
found Purity in the throes of lovemaking with the most unattractive people, and usually at some time in the night during, after or before Purity and she had made love together. She might be deep inside Purity, her bottom trembling with ecstasy, sweat clinging to her chest and Purity’s vagina clasped tightly to her penis (Purity had quite a grip which she used to great erotic effect). Then Innocence would notice a hand grasp her testicles, or another tongue probe the entrance to her anus as her buttocks were gently parted, or see another penis appear in front of her face to be greedily gobbled by Purity. Sometimes there might be four or five people gathered around Purity and her participating in their activity with no prior invitation to do so.

  Innocence knew that her attitudes towards sex were definitely not as liberated as they ought to be. She found some of the partners she made love to distinctly unattractive. They might be grossly obese with layers of fat around the top of their thighs and contrasting tiny hands or feet. They might be painfully thin with breasts more like fat sausages with hairy nipples at the end. There were penises that barely made any impression when erect - perhaps half an inch long and spurted uncontrollably and often into her face. There were those who made no effort to clean the shit from their bum after they’d excreted leaving unpleasant dried and sometimes moist brown faeces trailing between their cheeks. A common feature of members of the commune was their lack of physically attractiveness - Bouche and Purity were very prominent exceptions and this possibly explained their popularity as partners. This common feature was partly obscured by the curtains of hair over the face and shoulders, but not assisted in many cases by the untrimmed facial hair.

  Innocence wasn’t getting to enjoy the meals or the meetings any more. The meals were distinguishable only by the strength of the herbs and spices that were mixed in, sometimes so strong that however hungry she happened to be she was unable to digest the food at all. The meetings became, if anything, more tedious as she became more familiar with the topics of conversation. Frequently, in any case, she would find her attention diverted from the meeting as Purity or another person would start stimulating her penis or even suck it off in full view of everyone.