Book Boyfriend

by D. C. Renee

  After Travis finally realized why we kept laughing, I had another trick up my sleeve. I kept giving him clothes that were too small and swearing they were the right size. I could hear him mumbling about needing to lose some weight in the fitting room, and I was practically in tears, I was laughing so hard.

  “You are evil, Kim,” Brent whispered.

  “Evil genius.” I laughed.

  “Remind me not to get on your bad side. If this is what you do to a friend, then I’d hate to see what you do to enemies.”

  It only took about five shirts and three pairs of jeans for Travis to finally look at one of the tags. Only. He busted out of the fitting room sans shirt and shorts, boxers only. My jaw might have dropped a little. What? I wasn’t blind. I knew a good body deserved to be looked at.

  “Kim! What the fuck?”

  “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. I couldn’t help it. I get bored sometimes, and you guys use me for entertainment. It was my turn to have some fun,” I justified. “Besides,” I added, “you can thank me.”

  “Thank you for what?” he asked, completely unaware of the current situation

  “Well, in case you didn’t realize how you are dressed currently,” I said as waved my hand up and down his body. “You’re showing off quite a bit of skin and the fine women around the store are staring. I think I might have just helped you get laid tonight.” I winked for good measure.

  “I don’t need help,” he huffed before going back to the fitting room.

  “Aw! Is Travis shy about his goods?” I chuckled.

  “I show more skin than this when I train,” he yelled at the door.

  “And yet, you blushed when I saw you in your boxers. Maybe you’re just shy around nice girls.”

  “You’re not nice!” I laughed and so did Brent.

  “Sure I am, and I thought it was endearing. Let’s remember that when we are working on winning our bet.”

  “Whatever,” he mumbled while Brent and I continued laughing. Suffice it to say, it took far longer than the boys thought to get Travis a new wardrobe, but it was totally worth it.

  chapter five

  The next step was getting Travis to flirt without trying to get a girl into bed within five minutes. He was a charmer all right, a really good one. A little too good in fact. I asked him to flirt with a girl while within earshot so I could figure out what needed work. Within mere seconds, he had his tongue down her throat. Seconds! And the worst part was that it was broad daylight in the middle of campus, and no one freaking cared!

  I had to literally go pull him off. “What the fuck, Kim?” he sneered as I dragged him away. “I was minutes away from getting her to head back to my room.”

  “And that’s the problem,” I hissed, frustrated.

  “Don’t really see a problem there.”

  “Yeah. On your own time, fine, take girls back to your room by the dozens. But the point is not to find someone willing to sleep with you without even knowing a damn thing about you except your name and your nice stupid smile.”

  “Nice stupid smile, eh? Never heard it called that, but I’ll take it.” Right then he was wearing a smug smile, and I wanted to wipe it off his face.

  “Ugh! You are so frustrating!” I ranted.

  “Kim, chill. Why don’t you just tell me what’s wrong.”

  “You need to be able to win a girl’s trust. You need her to want to get to know you. You. Not your body or your sexual skills. She needs to want to be friends with you, go on a date with you, maybe kiss you at the end, but not want to jump your bones within two seconds. There are exceptions to the rule, but most good girls? They don’t go for sex right off the bat.”

  “Damn, this bet is gonna be harder than I thought,” he mused.

  “You’re telling me.”

  “Well, what about you?” he asked me.

  “What about me?”

  “I’m friends with you. You know me, and you didn’t want to sleep with me.”

  “Trav, you’re hot. You’re too hot for your own good, and you know it whether I tell you that or not. I couldn’t help but stare at you when I saw you and I thought nasty thoughts, just like all other women. However, I have only slept with guys I was serious about. And the cocky look you had the first time I met you said you were the kind who only slept with girls you weren’t serious about. If you flirted with me, truly flirted with me, then I would have run screaming for the hills and wouldn’t have stayed around to give you the chance to be my friend. I guess, fortunately for me, since I actually like being your friend—although if you ever repeat this, I’ll deny it—I embarrassed myself, had to talk to you to explain, and that led to friendship. However, I highly doubt the same situation will present itself. Plus, we’re friends now. That means we don’t want to sleep with each other. So I don’t think I’m a good example.”

  The entire time I was talking, Travis had eyed me curiously. I also saw a myriad of emotions pass his face as I spoke, but I didn’t understand them. I wanted to ask him about it, but we had work to do, so I pushed aside my curiosity.

  “You can, however, practice subtle flirting with me.” I grinned, which caused Travis to smile.

  “All right, my place or yours,” he asked.

  I laughed and smacked his arm. “You don’t even realize you are doing it, do you? It just comes naturally, huh?” Travis just shrugged, but he was grinning ear to ear. “Yours, big boy. Take me to your place,” I answered in my best sultry voice, and Travis laughed.

  Twenty minutes later, we were sitting on Travis’ couch, and I was coaching him. “No sexual innuendos, at all,” I emphasized. “Your goal is not to get her into bed. And come on, seriously, Travis, don’t you ever get tired of your endless string of bimbos? Don’t you ever want someone to actually want to get to know you? Someone who wants to hang out with you in their free time and not just for your body? Don’t you want to get to know someone on a deeper level than just to get off? Think about all that when you’re flirting.” He nodded, although I wasn’t sure if he was actually listening.

  “Okay, I’m a nice girl, and I fit the Abby bill. You want to flirt with me, so what do you do?”

  “I approach you?” he asked.

  “Well, yeah, how else is she going to notice you?” At least he had the first step down.

  “Are you implying I don’t get noticed?” Or maybe he was being serious. After all, I saw him in action. Plenty of girls actually walked up to him. I don’t think he ever really had to make a move unless he felt like it.

  “Yeah, Trav, you get noticed, a lot, but not by the girls we want you to get noticed by. Well, that’s a lie. Even good girls have eyes, for example, yours truly, but notice and stay versus notice and move on are two different things. I would have moved on. The girl you sucked face with earlier today, clearly, she would have stayed.”

  “Okay, fine, I approach you.”

  “And then what?”

  “Hey,” he said in a confident, deep voice.

  I had to admit it made me shiver a bit, but then I responded with, “Hey,” and nothing else just to prove a point.

  “That’s it?” he asked.

  “What did you want me to say? ‘Oh wow, you are so hot! I can’t believe you are talking to me. Me! OMG!’” I added the “OMG” in a high-pitched squeal. “You approached me, remember? What the hell do you want from me after just saying hi?”

  “Well, what would you say if you were me?”

  “How about I tell you what would work with me instead.”

  “Okay.”

  “You need to seem vulnerable. I need to feel like I’m the first and only girl who you actually approached instead of approaching you. You need to draw me in within those first few seconds and make me feel special because I know you are too good to be true and I don’t want to be a notch on your bedpost. You want to know what’s worked for me?”

  “Yeah.” He nodded.

  “Do you always do that when you are concentrating?”

  “Huh?”r />
  “That’s what I asked the guy, too. And he responded, ‘Do you always scrunch your nose in that cute way when you are concentrating? Because I noticed you were so deep in thought, not noticing the world around you, and then all of a sudden, you scrunched your nose and it was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. I had to know if you do it all the time.’”

  “What the hell?” Travis asked.

  “You know what happened? I stuttered. Me! Yes, me, big mouth who doesn’t shut up, ever. I stuttered. You know why? Because he noticed something about me. Me. He didn’t say I was cute or hot or sexy, or whatever. He noticed a small detail. He had me hook, line, and sinker. He proceeded to ask if he could personally find out if I scrunch my nose at any other moments, which meant, of course, we needed to go out. So, we did, and then we kept going out, for about six months until he cheated on me. He had been cheating on me, apparently, broke my heart, and I found out he was just a player wearing a good guy’s disguise. That’s why I was so not okay with hurting someone just for a bet. A harmless date, fine, I’m in, but anything more, and, Travis, I will personally hurt you myself.” I could feel my bubbly walls start to crumble. It had hurt when I found out what kind of guy Will truly was; it hurt even worse that I had fallen for him and that he was my first, but I learned my lesson. I had also become Miss Personality so I would never have to worry about being too deep with anyone. I couldn’t believe I had shared this with Travis, but I wasn’t going to let it go further.

  Travis stared at me with sadness and pity in his eyes. Pity for me, and I didn’t want it. I didn’t like it. I was a big girl, and I was moving on from this. He reached out a hand, and I knew he was going to try to comfort me, which was pretty shocking actually. Travis wasn’t the comforting type, but I didn’t want that from him or anyone. So before he could, I spoke, effectively killing the slightly sad moment. “The point, Trav, is that he made me feel like I wasn’t just fun for him. Hence, he got the good girl. That’s what you need to do. You need to take a moment to study the girl you plan to flirt with and learn something about her. Find something small to make her want to get to know you better and allow you to get to know her. ‘Hey’ is not sufficient. ‘This might sound forward, but I couldn’t keep my eyes off you. Your eyes are the most brilliant shade of blue I’ve ever seen. It’s like a mix between the ocean and the sky, and I had to come see them in person.’ That, Trav, is sufficient. Yes, sure, it’s a line, a cheesy one at that, but you took the time to write it in your head. You took the time to find a line that would fit the girl. That is what is going to get her.”

  Travis just nodded. I had tried to lighten the mood a bit by switching it up on him with that line, but it hadn’t helped. I was down, and I knew Travis felt my mood. I wasn’t happy-go-lucky Kim right now, and I didn’t want to be. I needed to go find Lauren and eat a ton of ice cream.

  “So I think that’s enough for today. Tomorrow, we’ll find you an Abby, and we’ll try it out.”

  I got up, brushed my hands on my legs, and Travis stood to walk me out. He gave me a quick hug, as he usually did, but before he closed the door, he softly spoke words I thought I’d never hear from someone like him. “For what it’s worth, you do scrunch your nose every time you concentrate, and it really is cute. And that guy was an asshole for using that against you. I may be a player, Kim, but at least I’m upfront with the girls. They know who they are getting when we hook up. I make no promises and neither do they. But, if I did make them, I would keep them. I’d never hurt you.”

  I nodded. “I know, Travis. That’s why I told you that I was fortunate that I became your friend after all. You’re a good guy. A player but a good guy.” I smiled, but it was forced. He smiled too, but it was strained. “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow. And remember, Brent is coming to watch, so you better not crash and burn.” And just like that, I was back. Travis laughed, and I went home to stuff myself with junk food.

  chapter six

  The following day, Brent, Travis, and I met up on campus.

  “So which one is Abby?” Brent asked.

  “This is just practice,” I responded.

  Brent’s eyebrows drew together in confusion. “Practice for what?”

  “To see if Travis can flirt the right way,” I stated matter-of-factly.

  “Oh, Kim, sweetheart, I think Travis can flirt with no problem. Not sure where you have been hiding out, but his bedroom door is definitely a revolving one.” Brent chuckled.

  “Exactly! That’s the wrong kind of flirting!” I exclaimed.

  “Hello! You guys know I’m right here, right?” Travis chimed in, but we ignored him.

  “How in the hell is there a wrong kind of flirting?” Brent asked.

  “That’s what I asked, too.” Travis tried desperately to fit into the conversation, but again, his voice fell on deaf ears.

  “The bet isn’t for him to get a girl in the sack,” I scowled. “All he has to do is smile flirtatiously, and he gets a girl to go back with him. We don’t want that, remember? We want a good girl—one who doesn’t want to jump his bones, one who wants to go on a nice date with him and like him—and poof, we win. So stop sabotaging our bet!” I yelled. “I don’t even know why you’re here anyways,” I said in frustration.

  I wasn’t even all that sure why I was getting so upset with them. Maybe it was the fact that they were extremely good looking and fairly intelligent and could get just about any girl they wanted and yet, they didn’t know the difference between the various types of flirting. That meant that all they cared about was getting some tail, and although I knew that was who these guys were, it still kind of bothered me.

  “All right, master, why don’t you show us how it’s done then?” Brent challenged.

  “Master? Me? I don’t know. I mean, you are so good at everything you do. You’re smart, and I should know since you help me with bio all the time. And you’re nice and charming, and girls scowl me at constantly because I get to hang out with you. But me? I’m just trying to get through college and maybe have some fun along the way. I guess I was really lucky you and Trav decided I was worth being friends with. I’m just plain old me, nothing special here. Definitely no master or anything. I mean, come on, I haven’t had a boyfriend in as long as I can remember. I don’t even know how I think I can teach you guys anything.” I said the entire thing with an increasingly sad note and a tiny hint of mockery, but I knew the boys didn’t catch on to that little bit.

  “Kim, you’re wonderful and smart too, and entertaining. Come on, you have to know you’re beautiful. You have a great personality, always happy. We’re the lucky ones. You know if you so much as batted your eyelashes at one of us, we’d fight it out to see who could get a piece of you.” Brent tried to cheer me up and then he pulled me into a hug. He was really a nice guy underneath it all. When he pulled away slightly, I looked up at him with a giant grin on my face and then proceeded to bat my eyelashes in mock fashion.

  Brent stared at me for a moment before the realization of what happened flashed across his face and then he pulled back. “Oh, oh, damn, you’re good.”

  “I’m still confused.” Travis stared at us.

  “That, my friend, was watching a master.” Brent laughed. “She,” he pointed at me, “just played us. She made us think she was vulnerable and in need of comfort, to which I, unsurprisingly, since all I said was obviously true, fell right into that role. All I wanted at that moment was to be there for her and make her feel better instead of thinking about how she looks naked, which,” he looked at me, “I do all the time. Just so you know,” and then he smirked.

  Travis turned to look at me, and I saw the awe in his eyes. As I said before, I knew I wasn’t a knockout, but I knew how to work what I had, especially after Will had broken me down. I wasn’t going to be a weakling ever again, so I made sure I knew how to use every skill available to me.

  “I think you might have a bit of drool right there,” I said and pointed at Travis’ lips. “Mouth closed or people wil
l think you have issues. But Brent got it spot on. And it’s what I said last night. You need to find something that will draw her in. You can appear vulnerable, you can use a line on her, and you can compliment her, or even jokingly insult her, as long as it’s something unique to her.”

  “Right, and how will I do that?”

  “Do I have to do everything?” I huffed.

  “Hey, don’t look at me,” Brent said, holding up his hands. “That’s why I offered you up to help Travis.”

  “Ugh! Okay, fine. Let’s see.” I scanned the unsuspecting girls sitting around. “There,” I pointed to a fairly attractive blonde sitting under a tree reading some textbook.

  “What am I supposed to say to her?” Travis asked.

  “Hmm,” I thought for a moment. “Okay, go say something like, ‘Hey, you’re in my spot.’ But you have to say it playfully. She might flirt with you, but most likely, she’ll get an attitude with you, or she might even think you are crazy. Then, you can tell her something like, ‘Okay, so I should confess it’s not technically my spot, but I saw you sitting here under the shade, and you didn’t look like you were anywhere near falling asleep, which is impressive considering it looks like you’re studying. So naturally, that meant this must be the perfect spot. But I’m no jerk, so how about we share it.’ You don’t give her a chance to answer before you plop down. And then you don’t say anything. You open your book, your phone, I don’t care what you do, but you don’t say anything. Trust me. She’ll talk to you. Just don’t go into sex-flirt mode. Got it?”

  “Where do you come up with this crap?” Travis asked, but he looked impressed.

  “Reading, remember, book boyfriends and all? Plus, if that were me, that’s what I’d want someone to say.”

  “You sure it’s gonna work?” Travis asked.

  “Positive!”

  Then I slapped his ass, probably a little too hard, and said, “Go get ‘em, tiger.” Travis’ step actually faltered while Brent tried desperately to hold in his laugh.

  “What?” I asked innocently. “Athletes slap each others’ asses all the time!” I cried. “I was cheering you on!” I tried to plead my case, in vain.