Until You

by Denise Grover Swank

  “So, if you can’t tell me about your job, then tell me about the cities you’ve lived in. I’m somewhat jealous. I’ve only lived in three places—Columbia, Blue Springs, and Kansas City, and in reality, the last two count as one.”

  “It was exciting at first,” she said. “Los Angeles, Denver, San Francisco, Seattle, and now here.”

  “Obviously Kansas City being the most glamorous.”

  She gave him a coy smile. “Hey, it’s not so bad. The perks here are pretty amazing.”

  His face lit up and he kissed her. “If I’m included in the perks package, I’m feeling pressure to keep you happy.”

  “You’re doing pretty well so far.”

  He turned more serious. “But I can see the downside. You said you live in furnished apartments so you don’t even have your own things with you. Do you have a home base anywhere?”

  “I used to have a storage unit in LA, but I got tired of paying the monthly fee when I didn’t use anything in it.”

  “So you’re homeless?”

  In the whole five years she’d been doing this, she’d never looked at it that way. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

  He paused, and something shifted in his eyes. “Where will you live if you move to Atlanta?”

  A wave of panic hit her and she sat up. “I don’t know. I hadn’t even considered that aspect of it.” She wouldn’t have Stephanie with her. She’d be alone. Suddenly, she felt like she was losing something important, and it gave her second thoughts.

  He sat up with her and turned her to face him. “Hey. It’s just logistics, Lanie. You’ll figure it out.”

  “Yeah.”

  When he spoke next, his words sounded weighted. “What about Aiden? I thought you two were friends.”

  What was she thinking? She wouldn’t be alone. She’d have Aiden and the people in his new company. From the way he talked it up, they often worked as a team and got along well. “Yeah.”

  Tyler pulled her into a deep, soulful kiss then lifted his head, searching her eyes. “Do you want to take a shower before I take you home?”

  She shoved her distress to the back of her head. She didn’t want her fear getting in the way of her time with Tyler. Giving him a sexy smile, she said, “Only if you take one with me.”

  He hauled her out of the bed and flush against his naked body. “It’s one of those Kansas City perks.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  What the hell had he gotten himself into?

  Tyler watched his younger brother pack away two hamburgers, an order of fries, and a chocolate shake. And now he was snatching an onion ring off Tyler’s plate.

  After their shower, he’d tried to get Lanie to go out to breakfast with him, but she only had her bridesmaid dress and one shoe—they couldn’t find the other anywhere, but he’d promised to check with the building manager on Tuesday. He’d suggested he take her home to change first, but she’d insisted she needed to get started with her paperwork, with writing her resignation letter at the top of the list, and said she’d see him at the barbecue.

  So after he’d dropped her off, he’d thought about their conversation about his brothers and called Eric and invited him to Five Guys for lunch. And now he was about to go broke feeding the kid.

  “Does Dad cook?” Tyler asked, finally caving in and shoving his tray toward the teen.

  Eric laughed through a mouthful of food. “Yeah, right.”

  “What do you guys eat?”

  “Frozen dinners. Takeout when Dad leaves money. He’s at the garage most of the time. I’m trying to get a part-time job, but the car Dad got me broke down.”

  Tyler frowned. “Why doesn’t Dad fix it? He owns a garage.”

  Eric shrugged and grabbed more of Tyler’s onion rings.

  Dammit. No one was taking care of his brother.

  His chest tightened, and he felt claustrophobic even though they were in a restaurant with thirteen-foot ceilings and walls of windows. He knew it wasn’t the restaurant making him feel closed in. It was memories of his childhood, when he’d been responsible for himself and Alex for as long as he could remember. Sure, his mother hadn’t left until Tyler was nearly seventeen, but in reality, she’d checked out long before she’d gone.

  Now Eric had no one taking care of him, and Tyler felt that old familiar noose tightening around his neck.

  But anxiety or not, this was his brother, who hadn’t asked for their shitty family any more than he had. “Say,” Tyler said carefully, testing out the words as he said them, “I need to go to the mall and get a few new dress shirts and ties. Want to come with me?”

  Eric glanced up at him as though there was a catch, and Tyler felt like a dick. He’d created this gap between them. It was up to him to repair it.

  “I need some jeans, too,” he said. “Maybe you could help me pick out a pair.”

  Eric snorted. “I thought you had swagger.”

  “Is that a good thing or bad?”

  His brother laughed, relaxing a bit. “Good, but now I’m reassessing.”

  “Then obviously I need your help. What do you say?”

  Eric studied Tyler’s face, and Tyler purposely remained impassive. He suspected it might be easier to lure a bear into a cage than to get his brother to go shopping with him.

  Finally, Eric shrugged. “Sure. Why not?”

  Two hours later, Tyler had two shirts and ties he hadn’t needed, along with a pair of jeans, a pair of shoes, and some T-shirts. But Eric had multiple bags of new clothes and shoes of his own. If it took pretending that Tyler needed new athletic shoes to convince Eric to go into the store and try a pair on and buy them, then so be it.

  “I’m hungry,” Eric said, after they left a trendy clothing store for teens. He was carrying a bag with several name-brand shirts and jeans. The only way Tyler could get Eric to let him buy them was by lying and telling him he’d gotten a coupon for 50 percent off at the register.

  Tyler laughed. “Why am I not surprised?” But when he saw the smile fall from Eric’s face, he quickly added, “But you read my mind. I’m hungry too. What will it be? I say we skip the food court. How about 54th Street Grill? I could go for their Gringo Dip.”

  Eric shrugged, trying to look indifferent. “Yeah. Sure.”

  They took their shopping bags to Tyler’s car and put them in the trunk before they drove across the street to the restaurant.

  After the hostess showed them to their seat, Tyler racked his brain for a subject to talk about. School was out. When he was seventeen, what was he interested in? Football and girls. Since Eric didn’t play football, that left girls.

  Shit. He was in trouble.

  When the waiter came over, Tyler ordered Gringo Dip and Eric ordered a chicken strip platter. When the waiter walked away, Eric beat him to starting the conversation. “So why are you hanging out with me? Couldn’t get a date?”

  Tyler considered reminding him it was three o’clock in the afternoon on Labor Day, not exactly prime dating time, but said, “I haven’t been dating lately.”

  Eric snickered. “Define lately. You mean the last few days?”

  “Five months.”

  Eric’s eyes widened, and he sat up, finally showing interest. “You’re kidding? Alex says you have a new woman every week.”

  Tyler shifted in his seat. “Let’s just say I had a situation that made me reconsider dating.”

  “Did you get someone pregnant?”

  Tyler’s eyes narrowed. “No. I know how to use birth control, moron. Do we need to have that talk?” The edge in his voice softened. Maybe they did need to have that talk. Their father had never given it to him when he was a teen. “I’m not sure what they teach you in school, but you need to use condoms every time, Eric. The girl might be on birth control, but it’s not always 100 percent foolproof, and you need to protect you both against STDs.”

  Eric squinted his eyes closed and shuddered. “Oh. My. God. I am not having this conversation.”

  “Tell me you’re s
mart when it comes to sex.”

  Eric pushed out a loud sigh. “Not everyone is like you, Tyler. We don’t all have women falling at our feet.”

  Tyler studied him for a moment. Eric hadn’t mentioned having a girlfriend, not that Tyler had ever told the family about the girls he’d dated back then either. But Eric wasn’t Tyler—he seemed more sensitive and not as cocky. Maybe that was why his grades were slipping. Maybe he had an unrequited crush on a girl. “True, but sometimes that’s a good thing. Is there anyone you’re interested in?”

  “I’m not talking about girls with you.”

  “Have you had a girlfriend?”

  “What part of ‘I’m not talking about girls with you’ do you not understand?”

  Defeated, Tyler picked up a package of sugar and twisted it in his fingers. “How’s band?” When Eric didn’t answer, he glanced over at him. “Are you still in band?”

  Eric held his gaze. “What instrument do I play?”

  Tyler dropped the sugar packet on the table, stalling. “Uh…the trombone?”

  Eric’s mouth pinched, and he crossed his arms, glaring out the window like he could catch one of the cars in the parking lot on fire if he concentrated hard enough.

  Wrong answer, apparently.

  The waiter brought their food, and Tyler realized this was his little brother, and he didn’t know jack shit about his life.

  “You were a cute baby.”

  Eric gave him a look that said he was sure Tyler had lost his mind.

  “I remember one Christmas, Mom dragged us to the mall to see Santa. I protested that I was too old to see Santa, but she wouldn’t take no for an answer. You were a baby. I was sixteen.”

  Eric’s expression softened. “What was she like?”

  Well, shit. She’d left six months later. Eric wouldn’t remember her at all. “Sometimes she was nice. Fun when she was around and…herself. When she acted like our mom, she used to do the stupidest things, like dance contests and gingerbread decorating contests between Alex and me.”

  “I bet Dad hated that.”

  “He did.” Looking back now, he wondered if his father had pushed her into her madness. He was a cantankerous, practical man. But she had been like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. When she was on the upswing, she was giggly, fun, and lit up the room when she walked in. He’d adored that mother. Worshipped her. But toward the end, she became the dark side of herself, especially when she became pregnant with Eric.

  He hadn’t understood it back then, but he’d talked to his grandmother and researched it later. Their mother had been bipolar, and when she became pregnant with Eric, she’d stopped taking her medication and refused to go back on it after he was born. She’d suffered a deep postpartum depression. She’d started doing drugs and hooked up with her dealer, and the next thing he knew, she was gone. They never heard from her again.

  She’d abandoned them all. Even the bubbly baby that shared her temperament when she wasn’t deep in her madness. Only there was no sign of that carefree temperament in Eric now.

  She might have abandoned her sons, but Tyler had abandoned Eric.

  The waiter came to check on them, and when he left, Tyler steered the conversation to the latest movies they’d seen. Before he knew it, Eric was telling him about marching band camp and a new video game he’d borrowed from a friend.

  Watching him, Tyler smiled, trying to remember being seventeen and having his whole life ahead of him. He’d been more cynical and jaded, mad at the whole fucking world, and while he’d turned out okay in the end, he didn’t want that for Eric.

  Tyler glanced at his phone to check the time. The barbecue was in an hour and a half, which meant he had another hour or so before he needed to take Eric home. Just as he was about to return his phone to his pocket, it rang.

  He almost let it go to voice mail, but was surprised to see Lanie’s number. They’d exchanged numbers that morning, but he hadn’t expected to talk to her until Britt and Randy’s get-together. Maybe she wanted him to take her home after the party. He hoped she wanted him to take her home after the party.

  He tried to disguise his excitement when he answered.

  “Lanie.” He glanced at his kid brother and decided he didn’t give a shit what he heard. He liked Lanie, and while he planned to keep it from everyone else—at Lanie’s request—Eric didn’t know any of his friends to tell. “Did you get all your work done?”

  “Yeah.” She sounded hesitant. “But I’m calling about something else, and I hope I’m not out of bounds.”

  He tried to quell his anticipation. It was obvious she was still trying to keep this as light and easy as possible, and common sense suggested that seeing each other three nights in a row was too much, too soon, yet damned if he didn’t want to see her anyway. “I told you I wanted you to tell me anything you feel comfortable sharing. No rules, Lanie. We’re just going to enjoy this before you go.”

  She hesitated. “Tyler, I think Britt’s on to us.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “She called me after you dropped me off this morning. She says Celesta cornered her last night and told her I was lusting after you.”

  Tyler nearly choked on his water. “She said that?”

  “I heard it secondhand, but basically that’s the story, and the word lust was definitely used. But Britt wanted to know if I liked you and is suggesting pairing us up at their shindig.”

  “Oh.” Why didn’t that idea sound as bad it should have? “So what do you suggest?”

  “I think one of us should skip Britt and Randy’s barbecue.”

  He blinked, sure he’d heard her wrong. “What?”

  “There’s too much chemistry between us to deny it. We might be able to get away with hiding it at the next photo shoot this week, but at a party? There’s no way I’ll be able to pretend I’m not interested in you if I’m with you for a couple of hours.”

  He suspected she was right.

  “It will be easier for me to come up with an excuse than you, so I’m going to text her and tell her I can’t get away from work. Which isn’t actually a lie.” She laughed, but there was no humor in her voice.

  He was surprised by the wave of disappointment that he wouldn’t see her. He rubbed his forehead, bumping his stitches. He flinched. “Shit.”

  “You’re pissed.”

  “What? No. That had nothing to do with you.” He rubbed his head again. “Lanie, I think you’re right, but let me ask you this—if you weren’t worried about her discovering us, would you still put work on the back burner and go to the barbecue?”

  “Yeah, but that’s beside the point.”

  “No. It’s not.” He pushed out a breath. “I’ll bow out. You go. Britt misses you, and you’re leaving in less than a month. She’ll be upset if you don’t show. I can see them anytime.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah.” He glanced over at his brother. “Believe it or not, I wasn’t planning to go anyway. I’m spending the day with my brother Eric.”

  “Thanks,” she said, her tone husky. “I know you’re lying about not going, and I think it’s sweet. I promise to make it up to you. I’m already thinking of several ways to show you my appreciation.”

  His groin tightened, and he shifted in his seat. “I’m looking forward to it,” he said, but kept his tone conversational.

  She laughed. “Your brother’s with you now, isn’t he?”

  “Yep.”

  “Older or younger?”

  “Younger.”

  “Too bad,” she whispered. “I was going to tell you some dirty, dirty things, but it doesn’t seem appropriate when you’re next to a teenager.” She laughed again. “Thanks, Tyler.” Then she hung up.

  He must have worn a bewildered expression, because Eric was grinning ear to ear. “I didn’t think you had a girlfriend.”

  “I don’t.”

  “Was that the woman you were obsessed with at the game?”

  “I wasn’t obsessed.�
��

  “Okay, the woman you stared at every two minutes.”

  Tyler grunted and shifted to relieve the pressure of his erection in his jeans. “That was Lanie.”

  “Lanie…” Eric’s tone sounded suggestive.

  Tyler turned on a dime. “You will say her name with respect.”

  His brother’s eyes widened. “Wow. You really like her.”

  He could deny it, but he had to deny it with everyone else—he didn’t want to deny it with Eric, too. “Yeah. I do.”

  “But she’s leaving in a month?”

  “Yeah.” He sucked in a breath and leaned his elbow on the table. “Her job moves her around every few months.”

  “That sucks. What does she do?”

  “She’s a time management consultant for retail stores.”

  “Wow,” Eric said taking a bite of his chicken tender. “How does that work?”

  “I’m not sure. She doesn’t talk about it much.”

  “Where is she going that she doesn’t want you to go?” Tyler shot him a surprised look, and he grinned. “I could hear your side of the conversation, you know.”

  Might as well tell him everything…within reason. “I’m a groomsman in my friends’ wedding—Britt and Randy. One of the bridesmaids is Britt’s cousin.”

  “Lanie.”

  “Yeah.”

  “She doesn’t want Britt to know about us because Britt tends to meddle.” When Eric made a face, he added, “She means well, but Lanie doesn’t want her to meddle with us. So she wants to keep it a secret. From everyone.”

  “Is she embarrassed by you?”

  That caught him off guard. “No. I don’t think so.” He’d dwell on that later. “But I suspect Britt might not meddle the way Lanie thinks. I think instead of trying to keep us together, she’d try to split us apart.”

  “I thought Britt was your friend.”

  “She is, but she knows my…past.” If Britt wanted Lanie to stay, setting her up with Tyler would be the last thing she’d do.

  “You mean that you’ve slept around with a lot of women?”

  Tyler’s eyes widened.

  “Dude, you never made any secret of it, and remember, Alex fills me in.”