I let a smile creep onto my face at the idea of a normal wild night with Steph. ‘I suppose one night out wouldn’t hurt.’
‘Exactly! I’ll call Marcus and see if he can come. Maybe you can bring Phoenix.’
‘Oh, yeah…’
I hadn’t actually seen Phoenix for a couple of days. After the trials and healing Lincoln, I had asked for some breathing space, just to clear my head. It had been good to go into a semi-lockdown at home. Have some time to myself.
‘There’s probably something I should tell you about Phoenix.’
‘What? Don’t tell me he’s a Grigori too. I’m starting to feel like an outcast!’
‘No. Definitely not a Grigori.’ How exactly did I say this? ‘He’s kind of, sort of…an exiled angel,’ I said, my voice sliding up an octave with each word.
‘WHAT? Phoenix is an angel? You’re dating an angel?’
‘An exiled angel,’ I corrected.
It took a few moments of frozen shock before she started again. ‘I can’t believe you didn’t tell me. Was he good or evil?’
‘What do you mean?’ I asked, not fully understanding.
‘Ah…hello? I mean, when he was all halo and wings.’
I rolled my eyes at her.
‘You know, was he one of the…whatever you called it – light ones or dark ones or whatever? Which one was he?’
Alarm bells rang as Steph’s words hit home. Exiles were exiles. I mean, once they were on earth they all kind of went into the same bag, but that didn’t make their pasts count for nothing. Angels of light and dark were very different beings.
‘I never asked.’ I spoke in a daydream.
‘What do you mean, never asked?’
There was a pause before I snapped to. ‘Of course he was light. He’s been amazing. Trust me, I’ve met a dark angel and he’s nothing like that. He was an angel of light.’ Even as I said it I could feel the stirrings of doubt. I pushed them aside. ‘Phoenix isn’t like other exiles anyway – he’s different.’ Again, I realised I didn’t know exactly what that meant. ‘I’ll call him tonight and see if he’s free,’ I said, putting a stop to my runaway thoughts.
Steph watched me for a moment, tapping her fingernails on the table, then blurted out, ‘Look, I understand why you’re so hurt by Lincoln, but are you sure it’s the right time to get involved with someone else? You might not have ever really been in a relationship with Lincoln, but in some ways you two were like an old married couple. You were in love with him – completely.’
I really didn’t want to have this conversation. It felt like I couldn’t have it in a way.
‘You’re the one who told me I should be having fun. Anyway, right now, the main thing I feel for Lincoln is hate.’ The words had come from my mouth, but it didn’t feel like me talking.
‘Wow, Vi, OK, I feel the rage. I get it, Lincoln’s on the shit list, but does that mean that Phoenix is the one you want to be with?’
It was a question I’d been starting to ask myself before the trials too. But since we’d come back, something had changed. I was less inclined to doubt him now.
‘He’s good to me, he looks after me when I need it, he’s honest and…we…’ I blushed.
‘Jesus, Mary and Joseph! You had SEX with him!’
I had a feeling she was enjoying the new slant on biblical references.
‘It kind of just happened,’ I said in a low voice, trying to remind Steph that we were actually in a public place and I didn’t want the whole world knowing I had lost my virginity to an exiled angel.
‘It kind of just happened? The flu kind of just happens – sex requires consensual dirty thoughts and the extensive removal of clothing! I want details, and when I say details – I mean the good details, not the gross details.’ She screwed up her face and we both laughed.
‘Actually, it was strange. Don’t get me wrong, Phoenix was amazing. He has obviously, you know…Clearly it wasn’t his first time.’
‘Yeah, yeah, he’s a sex god. Surprise, surprise. So what’s the problem?’
‘Nothing I guess. It’s just… He has this ability to make everything seem much more intense. He takes me away… It’s a rush and…kind of scary. I feel like I lose myself to him.’ My mind drifted to the images of the fire encasing us and the golden strands wrapping around us both.
‘Is that a good thing or a bad thing?’
It was a logical question. I answered quickly before I could let the doubt set in. ‘Good. It was good, I think.’
‘Well, I suggest you keep it to yourself for now. I wouldn’t like to be around if Lincoln finds out.’
I covered my face with my hands and sank into my chair.
‘No way!’ Steph almost fell off her seat in disbelief.
‘He figured it out.’ I cringed, peeping out from behind a few fingers.
‘Christ almighty!’ She smiled at her words. I rolled my eyes.
‘OK, but in all seriousness, what did he do? Was Phoenix there? Did he hit him? Who’s stronger out of the two? Is it a fair fight?’ She was rambling on so fast I could barely make out her words.
‘Actually, it was awful. He told me he loved me and that he had dreamed about how we would be together.’ I told her about the candles and the lilies. She looked around wistfully.
‘Oh. My. God! That is so… What did you say?’
‘It’s a little hazy now, but I think I told him…that I hated him.’
Steph leaned forward and actually looked worried. ‘Wow, not really into subtlety at the moment, are you? That doesn’t sound like something you’d say to your worst enemy, let alone Lincoln.’
I was a bit confused myself. ‘Maybe not. But every time I think of him or I’m around him lately, I just can’t stop all these feelings of anger and hate. I mean, it was bad when I first found out he’d been lying to me, but since coming back from the trials, it’s like I can’t escape them, like they’re controlling me.’
‘Hey, I’m all for a little venting, but maybe you should try letting go of some of the hate. You know – deep breaths or something. I mean, it sounds like you’re not going to be able to avoid each other for long, while doing the whole save-the-world thing too.’
She had a point and more than that, I actually agreed with her…in theory.
We spent most of the afternoon hanging out. Steph filled me in on her own love life, which was full-steam ahead. She and Marcus were officially a couple. He ticked all the boxes for Steph and he pretty much worshipped her. According to her, all was as it should be. She offered to carry on keeping me company, but after the tenth text message from Marcus, I pushed her onto the bus to go meet him.
Feeling the urge to be a little spontaneous, I bought some new clothes. They weren’t my usual style, but since everything else in my world had changed, why not my look? I even went and had my hair cut. It was nice to try something different and it gave me a new sense of confidence.
By the time I walked into the apartment, it was dark. Dad was sitting on the couch reading an architecture magazine. He closed it and sat up a little when I came in.
‘Hello, stranger. It seems like we never see each other these days.’
I knew I was going to have to explain my lengthy absences. The problem was, I still hadn’t figured out what I was going to say. We hadn’t even crossed paths since before the trials.
‘I’m sorry I’ve been so caught up with work, sweetheart. I know I haven’t been around much, but if you’re still keen to have a catch-up over dinner one night soon, I’d really like that. How about Thursday next week?’
I relaxed and almost laughed. I’d forgotten that Dad pretty much existed in his own world. I decided it was a good thing.
‘Sure, Dad. Next week sounds fine. How about we go Italian?’
‘Great!’ He went back to his magazine.
I made a coffee and a sandwich and headed to my art studio. With a blank canvas, coffee in hand and Florence and The Machine playing on high, things seemed almost normal
. I even managed to fit in a quick call to Phoenix, inviting him to meet me at Hades the following night.
After speaking with him on the phone, I felt much better. Any doubts that had floated into my mind after talking with Steph vanished. Of course he’d been an angel of light.
CHAPTER THIRTY
‘There is no arguing with the pretenders to a divine knowledge and to a divine mission. They are possessed with the sin of pride. They have yielded to the perennial temptation.’
Walter Lippmann
I was standing alone as they marched towards me. Death, Doom and Destruction in the form of an army of exiles – a promise of pain and suffering wafting in and out of focus, becoming shadows and then reappearing. They moved like a physical force, almost suffocating everything around them.
The two that led emitted enormous power. One was slightly elevated above the ground, still walking but levitating at the same time. It was Onyx. The other looked at me, burning a hole into my eyes right through to my soul.
‘We can feel your power, rainbow. You are the link that promises destruction. We are coming for you.’
I heard the words, even though he didn’t actually speak.
I stood, unable to move, like the nightmares from my childhood where I couldn’t run away. I tried getting down on my hands and knees. In my dreams that sometimes worked. But I couldn’t move at all.
‘Who are you?’ I asked.
‘Joel. Once of the Principalities. I will not let you cloud my path. I have played caretaker to man for too long; now this world will conform. It is the only way.’
I saw the long silver sword by his side. He held the hilt and leaned on it like a walking stick. Blood was sliding down the edges. Where had it come from?
‘The only way to what?’ I asked, now feeling like this wasn’t only a dream.
‘To take the control we are entitled to. Humanity is weak and wicked in nature. They will serve us or be sacrificed.’
‘And you’re planning to be what? Their leader?’ I must have confused him, because he lost his composure for a brief moment before lifting his head high and continuing the sermon.
‘Humans have spat in the face of free will and abused their privileges. The time has come for a new order and it is clear that I must succeed where others have failed.’ He lifted the sword off the ground, still pointing it downwards. Blood dripped slowly from the point.
Fear coursed through my body, along with all five senses, though somewhat dampened.
His body distorted, eyes appeared all over him and wings spread from his back. Three wings on each side. My breath caught. They were magnificent. Then they burst into flames – raging red and blue fire – and he just stood there in front of me, his arms slightly apart as he burned. Then he was gone.
Onyx was left standing before me, his minions floating in the background under a cloud of gloom. He looked at me, smiling, tilting his head as he had the last time we met. He looked at me like he knew all my secrets.
‘For one who was once of the light, he does have an increasing flair for the dramatic,’ he said, sounding amused by Joel’s demonstration. ‘It’s a slippery slope, the road of sin. Even those with the most noble of causes can justify the need for it. Fabulous, isn’t it? He truly believes in his crusade, even as it stains what is left of his soul.’
Onyx glided towards me. I struggled for movement in my unwilling body. It seemed to cause him great pleasure.
‘That’s the beauty of exiled angels, for we all must inherit Original Sin in flesh. It is called concupiscence,’ he rolled the word on his tongue, ‘and has the most intriguing results in our kind. It makes things so much more…entertaining.’ He laughed and walked away, into the pulsing darkness that enveloped him.
I stood in emptiness, still unable to move, trapped. I could hear Onyx laughing his high-pitched cackle. Even in a dream, the guy was grating.
I could do this. I could free myself from this. It was just a dream. I took a deep breath and tried to centre myself and draw on the power that had been given to me. I used it to push the darkness away, peeling layers of it back and slowly surfacing, until the dream started to release me and I was able to bring myself back to –
– a street. No, some kind of alley. My mind took a moment to catch up with my eyes, but bit by bit the world around me came into focus. It was still dark, but not the same dark. It was night and I was no longer in my bed.
The senses were all around me now, a part of me, they hummed and buzzed. Apple and flowers encircled me, warning me but not overpowering me. They informed me and departed.
I was standing on my own, all except for the dead body that lay at my feet. A car drove by the opening to the alley, throwing a momentary beam of light towards me, illuminating enough of the body and face for me to recognise it. Lying in a pool of blood, in jeans and what was once a white button-down shirt, was Marcus.
What had I done? I didn’t know where I was, but I was dressed and it was the middle of the night. Had I been sleepwalking? Panicking, I patted down my jeans pockets and felt the familiar lump that meant I had my phone. When I pulled it out, I saw my hand was dripping with blood that I had smeared all down my clothes.
I called Griffin. I described the area and found a couple of street signs at the end of the alley. Griffin told me he would be there in ten minutes. After I broke into an all-out panic, he promised to be there in five.
I walked back into the dead end where I had woken from my nightmare and found the bloodied body. I braced myself for the awful sight again. Thoughts of Steph rolled through my mind.
But…it wasn’t Marcus.
This guy was tall and slim, wearing a dark suit. He would have been about thirty years old. He didn’t look anything like Marcus.
I called Steph. She answered, half asleep. ‘This better be an emergency of epic proportions. I’m talking rising from the dead kind of stuff here. It’s 3 am.’
‘Steph, when did you last speak to Marcus?’
‘Tonight, why?’ she asked, becoming more alert with my tone.
‘Can you try to call him for me? I need to know if he’s OK.’ I was doing that thing where I bounce up and down on the spot. It was becoming a habit.
‘OK.’ She drew out the word as if she thought I was crazy. I was wondering the same thing. ‘Can I ask why?’
I was freaking out, not thinking straight, so I just blurted it out. ‘I had a nightmare and then I woke up in an alley in the middle of the city and I was standing over a body and it looked like Marcus and now it…doesn’t.’
‘WHAT! Marcus is dead?’ She was hyperventilating.
‘Yes… No! I don’t know. Can you please just try to call him?’
She hung up the phone without another word.
While waiting for her to call back I looked in the alley to find something to clean myself up with. I settled for ripping apart a cardboard box. But when I looked down, the blood was no longer on my hands. They were as clean as if just washed. I dropped the cardboard, searching myself for any other signs of the blood. Nothing.
I was losing it. Losing perspective. I started to feel woozy and claustrophobic. I was going to pass out. I walked towards an upside-down crate and collapsed onto it just before my legs gave way.
Then next thing I knew, someone was slapping me across the face. Griffin.
‘Aww!’ What was it with everyone belting the crap out of me when I was unconscious?
‘Ah, you’ll be OK. You have extra durability now and you wouldn’t come round with the lighter slaps.’ He smiled a little.
‘How many times have you hit me?’ I asked, alarmed.
‘A few,’ he said, blowing it off and adding, ‘You’re a Grigori now, Violet. You can take a few hits.’ As if that was the end of it. ‘What happened?’ he asked.
I told him how I had ended up in the alley with the dead body after having a nightmare about Onyx and another exile called Joel. He sighed when he heard the name.
‘Do you know him?’ I ask
ed.
‘Yes, he’s an extremely powerful and insane exile, once of light,’ he raised his eyebrows at me, ‘with a particular panache for dream altering. He believes he is on a divine mission and he leaves a trail of death and destruction everywhere he goes. He is especially vengeful towards Grigori and has always been a hunter of us. We’ve never been able to get close enough to finish him.’ He shook his head and frowned. ‘Acting alone is bad enough. Working with Onyx…’ Griffin wiped his forehead then threw his hands in the air. ‘Honestly, they used to at least have some honour. Light and dark working together – there’s no integrity any more.’ Griffin kicked one of the wooden pallets beside me, breaking it in two. It seemed to calm him down. ‘Come on. Let’s look at this body.’ He turned towards the end of the alley where it lay.
My phone rang and when I answered Steph was on the other end, yelling at me.
‘Are you insane? You almost gave me a heart attack!’
‘Did you speak to Marcus?’
‘You mean did I piss Marcus off no end by waking him up in the middle of the night? Yes! I’ll be surprised if he ever takes me seriously again!’
My whole body folded over in relief. ‘That’s great!’ I said.
‘No…it’s not great. He thinks I’ve lost the plot.’
‘OK, so I’m sorry about that part, but I’m still glad he’s OK.’
‘You really saw a dead body that looked like him?’ She sounded in control but for the little tremor in her voice.
‘No. I saw a dead body that was him. I can’t explain it now. I’ll call you in the morning.’
‘There is some seriously weird stuff going on around you at the moment, you know that, don’t you?’
‘Yep.’
‘Well, call me when the sun is up.’ I could hear her getting back into bed. ‘Night.’ The phone went silent.
When I rejoined Griffin, he was leaning over the body and already on the phone, organising a clean-up crew. I suddenly had a bad feeling. He snapped his phone shut and put his head in his hands, taking deep breaths.
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