Save Me

by Amanda Heath

  “She shoved silly putty in the lock. We couldn’t unlock it from the outside. I’m so sorry we didn’t get here sooner. Wesley got hysterical, which made Paisley start crying and then I started crying, too. Royal spent twenty minutes trying to calm us down, the poor bastard.” Her hands shove into my hair and hold on for dear life.

  I look up from her rose-scented neck and kiss her hard. And I silently thank god for giving me a non-psycho crazy bitch as the mother of my child. And my future children. I won’t ever have to worry about anything when it comes to Rachel.

  My saving grace.

  My everything.

  A loud smacking sound breaks us apart and I turn to see my mother bringing her hand away from Annabella’s face. “Never in my life do I want to see you again. You stay away from my children and you stay away from me. You are dead to me, Annabella Renee Gage. DEAD!” she screeches.

  Donovan moves in next to Ma and pulls her behind him. “You’re dead to all of us, Annabella. I can’t believe I ever loved you. I can’t believe…” he chokes on his words. “I can’t believe you got rid of my baby. I can’t believe you got rid of an innocent life. You’re the most selfish bitch on this planet. I hope you get hit by a fucking train and it takes you days to die. Slowly and painfully.” Then he spits in her face.

  She bursts out of her chair, that crazy look back in her eye. “How dare you! You’re going to pay for that, you low life piece of shit!”

  Having had enough of her voice, I walk over and pick her arm up. I shove it at Donovan’s face and I see him go pale. Ma looks over his shoulder and curses. “I think this is the real reason for everything.” Then I drop her arm and go back to Rachel.

  This is about the time Victor bursts into the room. He takes in all of our faces and sighs. “What did she tell you?” he asks, looking at me.

  “Everything. But her version, and I’ve put the pieces together,” I tell him, still not happy with him, but then again, he’s her brother. He’s her family and he’s allowed to do what he thinks is best.

  “I got a call, right before Ash’s, from her treatment center. So, before you all think I wasn’t trying to get her help, this is the third one she’s checked herself out of.” He looks so fucking defeated; I honestly don’t know what to do for him. He crosses over to Annabella and kneels in front of her. “You’ve lost the majority of the people in this room because of your actions. If you don’t get in my car with me right now and go back to rehab, I’m done with you. I won’t ever do another thing for you. You’ll be dead to me, little sister. And that hurts me more than you could ever know.”

  Annabella looks up at him with fear in her eyes. All her life she’s known that she had Victor, no matter what she did. “You don’t mean that,” she whispers.

  He nods and stands up. “You’ve drawn a line in the sand Annabella. You got on drugs and ruined your life. You had an abortion so you could keep doing drugs. You hurt Pierce because he was close to finding out about the drugs. Donovan was safe because he was at school. You’re the reason Ash left me. You’ve put me through so much fucking hell Anna. If you don’t get help, then I’m fucking done with you. Everyone else already is.” Then he reaches out his hand for hers.

  I feel like the entire room takes a deep breath when she grabs his hand. Vic looks at me and nods. “Y’all have a nice wedding.” Then he nods at Rachel. “You look amazing, Rachel.” Before we all know it, they have left the room.

  I look down at Rachel who’s plastered to my side. “You still want to get hitched?”

  She rolls her eyes. “Like I’d let Annabella Gage steal the day.”

  Then we walk out to get married.

  ***

  “You see, I have this song I want to sing. I kind of feel like it’s Courtney’s and my song. We’ve been through a lot these past five months. And in four more we’ll have a little Courtney around.” Gasps go around the crowd because we hadn’t told anyone what we were having yet. “Anyway, this song means a lot to me. It’s one of those songs you hear and you get goose bumps all over. You just know that the song is going to have a special place in your heart. And this one finally made its point when I started things with Courtney.” She looks through the crowd until she finds me, and beams. “I love you, Courtney Pierce. I see the things in me now that you saw. The things I never thought were true. The things I didn’t think existed inside of me. Or maybe, they were just dormant and you brought them out in me. And I hope every day for the rest of our lives, you always see these things.”

  Royal, who stands behind her with his guitar, starts a chord. Nathan, who’s been playing the drums for forever, starts beating. And then Rachel starts singing “Vindicated” by Dashboard Confessional.

  I wear a huge grin throughout the song, watching my girl move. She sings like it’s the last time she’ll ever get to. She gets so into the song it’s like no one else is in the room but her and that microphone. The end of the song gets heavy and her voice rises. I get the goose bumps she mentioned, because she’s right, this song is about us. But she’s wrong; I’m seeing things in me that she already saw in me. We are vindicated and it’s amazing.

  “I didn’t know she could sing!” Ashley exclaims beside me. I look at my sister, who’s still in her blue bridesmaid dress. Her hair has fallen down, or she took it down. I’m not sure which is true, that she can’t stand having it up, or that Victor can’t. But now it is a habit for her to take it down.

  I lean over to kiss her cheek and turn back to Rachel. “Yeah, she can sing. She’s fucking perfect at whatever she does.”

  Ash smacks me on the shoulder before laying her head there. “Did he look okay?”

  I kiss the top of her head and wrap my arm around her shoulders. “No. He looks like he needs you.” Which is true. I had no idea Annabella was that bad off. If I had known back before Rachel, I would have made her get help. But now I don’t care. Annabella killed any feelings I had left inside for her. She was faced with the same thing Rachel was. Well, not exactly, since Annabella had been with Donovan for forever. But still, Rachel had more reason to get rid of our child. She never even considered that. She was going to raise the kid whether I was there or not.

  I’ll never forgive Annabella for her choice.

  “He asked me before I left if I would keep it to myself. He didn’t want to upset Donovan. He knew that we weren’t going to reach out to Annabella ever again. He wanted to keep Donovan in the dark, save him the heartache. I just couldn’t live in that house with her. I asked him to kick her out. She’s beyond saving. He just wouldn’t listen to me. And I refused to watch him go down with her.” I wipe the tears falling from her eyes. “He wouldn’t leave her. So I left him. I couldn’t live with the things she had done and the things he was hiding.”

  “He told her if she didn’t go back to rehab, she was dead to him. I think you got to him more than you think you did,” I tell her, running my fingers through the ends of her hair. I remember a time when our positions were reversed. She would comfort me and twirl her fingers through my hair. Or, way back when, when I had more hair.

  “I hope he sticks to that because if she was willing to have an abortion so she could stay on drugs, she is lost to us. That thing, isn’t Annabella.” She sits up and looks at me. “It goes to show you what kind of people there are. You and Annabella were brought together because you both went through something none of us could understand. But you grew into a good man, you learned from it, made yourself better. Annabella didn’t.”

  “I know, Ash. And I hope one day she finds peace. I found mine because of Annabella. But she won’t find it the way she’s going about her life now,” I state, turning back to Rachel. I’m definitely done talking about Annabella.

  In fact, I’m completely done with anything that has to do with Annabella.

  Forever and always.

  Epilogue

  It’s Time To Have A Baby

  “Dude, how can y’all have sex with her stomach that big?” Nathan asks me, ever t
he blunt guy.

  I roll my eyes and scoop up some vanilla ice cream to put on my apple pie. “I don’t have to be on top Nathan. There are other positions.”

  It’s Nathan’s turn to roll his eyes. “I meant can she breathe okay? She looks like she’s having trouble walking around,” he whispers, because we are in a room filled with several other people.

  I chuckle because he has a point. “I honestly didn’t feel okay having sex with her when she started to get big, but Rachel had other ideas. If my wife wants it, she gets it. I don’t have a choice in the matter.”

  “Do I even want to know what y’all are talking about?” Royal inquires, walking up beside me.

  “I was getting him to tell me how he has sex with Rachel. I was a little worried about her being able to breathe.” I love Nathan simply for the look on Royal’s face.

  “While I would rather not discuss my twin sister’s sex life, Court has it covered, man. He wouldn’t let anything bad happen to Rach,” he tells us while putting a huge glob of banana pudding on his plate.

  “I know that. I was just curious. I’ve never been around a pregnant lady. It’s one of those things you don’t think about until it’s in front of you and you get morbidly fascinated,” Nathan says, right before he cuts away from the table and heads over to the empty seat next to his girlfriend.

  Yes, I said girlfriend. Bess is a sweet, shy, southern belle and all kinds of perfect for our Nathan. They met this past September at Nathan’s college, where she also attends. I about fainted when he told me about her. I kind of thought the guy was gay. Not that that is a problem for me. I think love is love. Unless it’s illegal, I don’t have an issue with it.

  “He is handling her okay?” Royal asks, having not had time to question me about Nathan since he got in for Christmas break.

  “Surprisingly. They haven’t had any epic fights and his parents think she’s perfect.” I lean closer to him and lower my voice because Bess would get embarrassed if I announced this to the entire room. “When she found out about his Asperger’s she did a ton of research because she wanted to understand him. I told her to be herself because that’s all Nathan wants. Someone real and genuine.”

  “Our little Nathan is all grown up. I think I might cry.” Royal sniffs while eyeing a huge piece of chocolate cake.

  “Rachel did cry. But that was during her emotional month. She cried about everything for four weeks. I thought I was going to have to put her on anti-depressants or something.” We move down the food table until we reach the drink section.

  Royal picks up a Dr. Pepper and waits for me. “She called me every day that month. I feel for you buddy. That was bad enough, just listening to her on the phone.”

  I laugh and pick up a water bottle as Wes and Paisley walk up. “Are you talking about the ‘crying’ month?” Wes asks, her eyes lit up with mischief.

  Royal nods and bends down to kiss her on the forehead. Then he looks at me. “Wes and Paisley here thought it would be fun to mess with Rachel. They called her non stop that whole month and pretty much made her cry.”

  I glare at both of them and manage to flip them off before leaving and heading for my seat. Rachel looks up when I approach with her plate and water. “You should have told me Wes and Paisley were fucking with you back in October, G. I would have turned it back on them tenfold.”

  Rachel rolls her eyes. “It wasn’t like that. I just missed them and every time they called I got all upset. I can’t help it if this baby makes me insane. Thank god it’s almost time for him to come out. I’ve had about enough of being pregnant,” she grumbles, rubbing her huge belly.

  I’ve never thought she looked more beautiful. But then again, she’s pregnant with my child. And she’s my wife. And I love her. “Well, I know you’ll be happy to get your body back.”

  I grin when she glares at me. She knows I think the extra weight is hot. “You’re a sick bastard, Courtney. Only you would think I’m hot when I’m this fat and miserable.”

  I lean over in my chair bringing my face centimeters from hers. “I think you’re hot all the time, babe. You could be as big as a house and I would still want to fuck you.”

  “Gross! I don’t need to hear that shit!” Ashley exclaims, plopping down next to us. “I came over here because Victor showed up and I thought you could protect me, but now I think I might throw up.” Her nose wrinkles and I have to bite my lip to keep from laughing.

  “I’ll protect you, Ash. Vic won’t fuck with me. The guy is terrified of pregnant ladies.” Rachel smiles fondly. “Remember when I chased him out the door? That was priceless! I never thought I could use this belly as a weapon, but I can.”

  It’s not that Victor is scared of pregnancy or all that, it’s more that he thinks he has horrible luck and if he touches a pregnant lady her baby will die or something. And I only figured that out because Rachel tried to make him touch her belly and pure terror crossed his face. No one ever said Victor was okay. His sister is a spoiled, crazy, drug addict. He got blown up overseas for the U.S. Army and now suffers from PTSD. Oh, and my sister left him because he wouldn’t get the drug addict sister any help.

  Yes, his life sucks.

  “Victor is here?” Channing questions, walking up behind our little party.

  I immediately stand up and throw my arms around his shoulders. I let go pretty quickly though. I guess we took it pretty seriously when Ma said we were brothers. We talk on the phone a couple of times a week and we text all the time. Never in my life would I have thought I would be close to Channing Southerland. I haven’t seen him since Thanksgiving, so I’ve been looking forward to this Christmas gathering at my mother’s house.

  I sit back down as he hugs Ash tightly before moving to Rach and kissing her on the top of the head. “Yeah, mom invited him because he didn’t have anyone else to spend it with.” Annabella broke out of rehab shortly after my wedding. Victor hasn’t talked to her since. He refuses to have anything to do with her if she won’t get clean.

  I honestly don’t think Annabella has the willpower or strength. I think she used all of that to ruin her life to begin with.

  “At least he’s making an effort, Ash. You should go talk to him,” Channing tells her, looking at her like she’s nuts. We all know how much she loves Victor. When Wes used to say Annabella was it for me, I always thought she had the wrong couple. Really, Ash and Victor are it for each other. They’ve never been with anyone else, literally.

  What does that tell you?

  “Leave her alone. We can talk her into getting back with him on a day that isn’t Christmas,” Rach throws in, a grin on her face. “Besides, I’m about to have a baby. Ash is going to be too busy helping me.”

  Channing and I both shake our heads. Women.

  “EXCUSE ME!” My mother’s voice screeches all around the room. It seriously sounds like she is in several different places at once.

  We all look to the front of the room where my mother stands with a huge ass smile on her face. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look this happy. “I’m so happy to have everyone here this Christmas. This year has been exhausting, but eventful. We’ve gained several members of the family, and hopefully in the next couple of days we’ll have a baby around to help make us feel incredibly old.” We all laugh with her and she beams even brighter. “I just have to say a very public thank you to my favorite daughter-in-law, Rachel. Without you in my baby boy’s life, I think we would have lost him along the way. You brought him back to us and I can never thank you enough for that. Saving my son is the best present any mother could ever receive.” Ma starts getting emotional and the tears flow down her face. “I can’t thank-“

  Rachel lets out a scream and I go into action mode. I lean over her and bring her face to mine. “Where does it hurt?”

  She starts panting and glares at me. “In my stomach, you dumbass!” she yells and I can’t help but laugh.

  “I know, G. Is it a contraction or is it something else?” I ask gently, because
we’ve been through this before. Braxton Hicks sucks.

  “I think it’s real this time. But I don’t know. Just take me to the hospital.” She starts breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth. I stand up and bend over her chair to scoop her up. Even with twenty-five extra pounds, I can still carry her around without breaking a sweat.

  And right about now is when we all know it’s real.

  Wetness leaks down my front and all over the crotch of Rachel’s red dress. I stop and look wide-eyed down at her. “Did you just piss?”

  She raises her hand and smacks me. Hard. “No, that’s my water. Get me to the hospital! This shit hurts!” She lets out a pained noise and I feel it in my chest. I feel it every time she shows her pain.

  Channing comes up on my right and Royal comes up on my left. I feel Wesley and Paisley come up to my back. Everyone is running around cleaning up the food because it looks like we’ll be spending the night at the hospital.

  Channing opens the front door of the house when we get there and I walk out to his Range Rover, thankful he drove it today. “Why are we taking Channing’s car?” Rachel moans when I set her on the front seat.

  “Because it’s got enough room for the six of us. And he’s a better driver than me.” I kiss her lips softly and pull back. “Now, let’s go have a baby.”

  This only earns me a glare.

  ***

  Twelve hours of labor. Thirty minutes of pushing. Asher Noah Pierce was born. Eight pounds, three ounces. A head full of brown hair and the most beautiful hazel eyes I have ever seen. Well, when he’s awake long enough to see me. I was the first thing he saw and my heart clenched so hard I thought I was about to die. He’s the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

  I may never look at Rachel’s vagina the same way again. I should have listened to Channing when he said I might want to wait. I wasn’t about to miss the birth of my son though. She needed some stitches (like eighty of them) and a lot of blood and gore came out of there. It’ll go back to normal. I hope.