Learning to Love

by Erin Trejo

  “I don’t want you to stop.” She tries to move back in on me but I stop her.

  “I mean it, Mouse. My dick is about to fuckin’ burst as it is,” I tell her. Smiling down at her, she looks confused.

  Her hand lowers to the front of my jeans, gripping my hard length. My breath catches in my throat.

  “Goddamn it, Mouse.” Growling between my gritted teeth, she strokes me slowly.

  “I want you, Jace. I’ve never wanted anyone like this.” I know her wrists are still healing and so is her heart and mind. I can’t be that much of an asshole.

  Reaching down, I grip her hand to stop her.

  “It’s not that I don’t want you, Mouse. You have been through a lot though. I won’t rush that.” I can see the look in her eyes. She doesn’t believe me.

  I release her hand before reaching into the shower, turning it on.

  Mouse turns to walk away from me. Not happening.

  I grab her arm, yanking her back in front of me.

  “Don’t walk away from me. You know as much as I do that you’re healin’.” I don’t miss the huff that escaped her little lips either. Fuck, she is making this harder and harder for me.

  “I know what I want. It’s fine that you don’t want me, Jace,” she says in a pissy tone. Trying to pull away once more, I pull her back. Her back slams into my chest before I drag her little hand around.

  “You feel that? Don’t ever think I don’t want you, Mouse. My every goddamn thought has been filled with you.” I let her hand go before I unhook those sexy as fuck jeans. Sliding them down her body with her panties, she steps out of them.

  “Just because I’m lettin’ you heal doesn’t mean I can’t make you feel.”

  And I plan on making her feel like she’s losing her sanity to me. I plan on making her feel just how much I care about her.

  Chapter 35

  Mouse

  His breath skims over my skin, lighting it on fire.

  He strips us both in record time before pulling me into the shower.

  It hurts that he doesn’t want to have sex with me. I want him, I know I do. Maybe I can convince him to do things my way. Jace doesn’t seem to alpha to me, but then again, I haven’t slept with him either. Maybe he is in the bed, I don’t know.

  “Whatever you have goin’ around in that head of yours, you can stop it,” he says, his voice husky. My eyes slowly open. Shit! When did I close them?

  His bright green eyes burn straight into me. The intensity I see in them is fucking hot.

  “You have no idea what’s going on in my mind.” His little smirk tells me he does though.

  “You won’t win, Mouse. I’m the cat. You’re my fuckin’ prey. Not the other way around.” My whole-body shivers when he talks to me like that.

  Jace reaches for the body wash, squirting some into his hand before moving closer to me.

  “You like the game, Mouse? You like me feastin’ on you?” His chest nearly touches mine but I can feel that warmth shooting off him.

  He rubs his hands together before he speaks.

  “Turn around,” he says gruffly. I don’t want to. I want to look at those beautiful eyes of his but when he looks at me the way he is and talks to me in that husky voice, I’d do anything he wanted.

  I slowly turn around when his hands land on my shoulders. Massaging them gently, I melt into his touch.

  “You never answered me, Mouse.” His lips brush over my earlobe. This man is going to make me cum without even fucking me.

  “Like a good cat, I wanna play with my mouse.” His hands slide down and around my waist.

  The slippery soap coats my skin as Jace brings his hands up to my breasts. Just the gentle touch of his calloused fingers sends my body into overdrive.

  He plucks and twists my nipples between his fingers. My mouth hangs open, soft pants, leaving my lips.

  His hands grope and knead my breasts as heat pools within me.

  His teeth clamp down on my earlobe and the moans that fall from my lips are foreign.

  “Hmm. I think my Mouse likes to play.” One of his hands stays on my breast as the other slides down my stomach.

  “Be a good girl now, Mouse. When you cum, I want to feel every drop of it.” Ok, my earlier thoughts of him not being too alpha just flew out the window.

  Jace’s hands feel so perfect. He makes me feel alive. I’ve never felt this before.

  I never want it to stop.

  Chapter 36

  Bullet

  Goddamn! Holding her against my chest feels perfect.

  Her head’s lying on my shoulder as I work her little body into a frenzy.

  Her nipples are like hard-little pebbles under my touch, but reaching between her thighs, I almost lose myself.

  She’s so goddamn hot and ready. I know I need to give her time, but I’m starting to rethink my own sanity if I wait too long.

  The anticipation is beyond worth it, though. The way she writhes in my grasp is stunning.

  My finger slides over her clit, her back arching off me.

  “Fuck, Mouse.” Biting her earlobe, she moans. Yeah, she’s trying to kill me here.

  I work my slippery finger over her entrance before slowly dragging it back up to her clit. Each time, her back arches and moans float out of those lips.

  I can’t do this. I can’t keep touching her and not taste her.

  Releasing her, she whines before I spin her, pressing her back against the wall.

  “I know I said I was gonna go slow but fuck, Mouse. You’re killin’ my damn dick here.” Dropping to my knees in front of her, she watches me intently. I shove her legs apart before positioning her the way I want her.

  I flick my tongue out, sliding it over her clit. Mouse throws her head back, her eyes closing. Oh, like fuck she will.

  “Nope. Your eyes stay on me or I stop.” It’s a warning. It isn’t an option. I will stop and she will hate every second of it.

  Her head jerks forward, her eyes landing on mine.

  “That’s better.” Spreading her pussy lips wide open for me, I lean back in. Our eyes stay locked as I flick my tongue across that sensitive nub.

  Her eyes are hooded, desire floating through her. I can see it all over her face. I love it.

  I continue my torture when her eyes slowly close.

  I stop too. Just like I said I would.

  “Jace!” she cries. Her head shoots forward, her eyes filled with amusement.

  “Last warnin’, Mouse, and you won’t cum at all.” She wants to protest, but when my lips clamp down on her clit, she has nothing to say but my name.

  I work her faster and faster with my tongue. Much to my surprise, her hand goes up to her tits, kneading and tugging at her nipple. Fuck!

  Watching her eyes on me and her hands on herself, I almost cum right on the spot but I can feel her so close to her release.

  Grunting against her, she knows what she’s doing to me. She knows she’s got me all worked the fuck up here, too.

  A few more rough strokes and she cums hard. Her body shakes when I reach up, holding her in place.

  I let my tongue linger between her lips, taking what she has to give before I pull back.

  Shoving off the floor, I stand in front of her flushed pink face.

  “When I get inside of you—you will be mine.”

  Chapter 37

  Trinity

  Nightmares. It’s always the same. They never stop or ease up.

  Startling myself awake, I glance over at Jace. He looks so peaceful in his sleep.

  His long hair is fanned around him. He’s gorgeous. But what melts my insides is his hand. His fingers are tightly wrapped around mine, just like when we were in the cells.

  Jace always made it a point to do that. He always kept me sane by doing that, too. It was our little piece of home.

  “I like doin’ it.” Glancing up at him, his eyes are opened, looking at our conjoined fingers.

  “Makes me feel safer.” I give him a smi
le when he finally looks up at me.

  “Me, too. I didn’t know at the time, but it always calmed me,” I say. Jace moves, rolling onto his side. He pushes up on his elbow as he glances at me.

  “It was weird, right? Only bein’ able to hold fingers. But the feelin’ that I had when we did... fuck, I can’t explain it, Mouse.” Those big green eyes could suck the life right out of me.

  “My dad will come for me, Jace.” Saying what we’ve both been denying, he sighs.

  “He might. He might not. Either way, I’ll be ready for him.” He lies back down, not looking at me.

  “He won’t stop. I know him. It’s better for you if I just go back,” I say. Clearly, that was the wrong answer. Jace bolts out of the bed before jerking his jeans on.

  His hand runs through his hair as he paces the room.

  “Nothin’ in life is ever promised. I went to war and I thought I was done. I thought that after what I saw there, nothin’ could come close to it. Then I saw you. The very first time I saw you... you were broken and I fuckin’ hated it. You overcame everything else. You took the visions of war and molded them into you. I never wanted to hold on to somethin’ like that in my life, Mouse. It killed me to let you go. I wanted to protect you.” Shaking his head, he won’t look at me. He just keeps walking.

  “I didn’t know.” My words are only a whisper.

  “You mean a lot to me, Mouse. I’ve made that clear, but if you can’t handle me takin’ care of you, this will never work. I’m built to protect. It’s what I do.” When that leaves him, I shove off the bed.

  Walking to him, I stand there, staring into the eyes of the man that wants to take care of me.

  “I’m afraid to trust.” His hands come to rest on my cheeks, looking into my eyes.

  “I’ve never given you a reason to not trust me, Mouse. You did it once in that hell. Do it again.”

  He’s not asking me, he’s begging me.

  He hasn’t given me a reason to not trust him, but at the same time, it’s hard for me after what I’ve been through.

  Chapter 37

  Bullet

  We met Misty’s husband, David. He seems like a good man. I can’t be the judge though, I’ve never been good at that.

  I heard my mom say that my dad was on his way. My stomach cramps slightly. I left Mouse asleep. I didn’t want to wake her.

  She had a long night last night. Nightmares seem to shake her sleep almost all the time and I hate it for her.

  “You can’t just show up whenever you want to.” I hear my mom’s voice. She’s pissed and has every right to be if what Misty said is true.

  I take my chance and head down the stairs anyway.

  He stands there in a business suit. Looking just like I remember him.

  “Dad,” I say. His eyes slowly pull to mine. Not even the hint of a smile crosses the man’s face.

  “What are you doing here, Jace?” What a nice way to greet your son. I huff out a breath before turning to head back up the stairs.

  “He came to visit, Dave!” My mom’s voice hits me like a ton of bricks. He doesn’t care, never did.

  I head back into the room without another word.

  I don’t know why I thought he might be happy. I don’t know why I thought he’d even give a shit about me anymore. I guess that was all my fault.

  “You okay?” Mouse asks. Glancing over at her, I nod.

  “My dad’s home. Not happy I’m here. We might take off later.” I don’t need to be where I’m not wanted. As much as I’ve enjoyed seeing my mom and Misty, I don’t need this shit.

  “I’m sorry, Jace. I know how that feels,” she says softly. I know she does and that’s why I won’t subject her to the same thing here.

  “I told your mom, I’d help with breakfast.” Always the sweetheart. I shake my head with a smile when she gets up.

  I watch as she quickly throws her clothes on.

  Mouse gives me a wink over her shoulder before leaving the room. I’m left to my own darkness. The one that I hate. The one that I’ve had for a long fucking time.

  I get lost in myself. I never liked it. In fact, I’ve always hated it. I never know where my thoughts will take me and that’s the scary part.

  I place my head in my hands until I hear the door slam shut.

  Looking up, Mouse is pale.

  “What the hell happened?” I ask. My eyes narrow on her. She looks as though she might throw up if given the chance.

  “Mouse?” I say her name again. Her breathing is rapid and uneven. What the fuck is going on?

  Shoving off the bed, I grab her face in my hands.

  “Focus, Mouse. Tell me what happened.”

  Whatever the hell it was, it’s not good. I can see it in her eyes.

  Chapter 38

  Mouse

  He knows me. He said my name, but who is he? I’ve never seen him before. I don’t know him.

  “I have to leave, Jace. Now!” I scream. His hands tighten on my shoulders, but I need out of here, now.

  I shake him loose before he steps back in front of me.

  “Stop this shit! What happened?” he growls. He’s pissed but I’m scared. I shut down. I need to be gone.

  “I need to go! Don’t you listen?” Snapping at him, I see the hurt in his eyes. I’m hurting him, but I can’t find it in myself to care right now. I need to get out of here. What if my dad comes here? What if he hurts them because I’m here? I can’t let that happen.

  “You won’t go anywhere until you tell me what the fuck happened!” he roars. Yeah, he’s pissed. I’ve never seen his face contorted in anger the way it is right now.

  “He knows me, Jace! He called me by my name!” I say in a panic. I rush around the room, grabbing the small bag Aubrie packed me. I toss my stuff in while Jace trails behind me.

  “Who, Mouse? Who knows you?” he asks. How do I tell him it’s his own dad?

  Shit!

  “Your dad, Jace. He knows me. I don’t doubt that he isn’t on the phone right now,” I say with a new fear inside of me. His face falls. His eyes darken before he spins around and leaves the room.

  I don’t follow him. Shit, I just need to get out of here. I toss the rest of my stuff into the bag before throwing it over my shoulder.

  I can hear screaming downstairs and I feel like shit that I had to put Jace in the middle.

  It’s too late to feel bad for it now, though. I said the words. I told him that his dad knows me. I don’t know how or why, but I don’t plan on sticking around to find out either. If my dad finds me, I already know that my life will be over in the blink of an eye.

  I close the bedroom door behind me before heading down the hall. The screams get louder, but it’s the deadly note in Jace’s voice that startles me.

  Making my way down the stairs, I see Jace directly at the bottom.

  He sees me out of the corner of his eye. He extends his hand to me but never looks my way. His focus is intently on his dad.

  I go to him, much like I always do.

  “You are making a huge mistake with that one, Jace!” His dad points at me but Jace’s stance never changes.

  The look in his dad’s eyes is as deadly as Jace’s.

  He has to know more about me than I originally thought. That gleam in his eyes is pure hatred.

  Chapter 39

  Bullet

  I wonder what the fuck gave him the idea that I cared about his opinion?

  “Back off of this one. I don’t know who the hell you’re workin’ with but you are pickin’ the wrong war.” My voice is as deadly as I feel right now. I don’t know what he’s gotten into but he sure as hell better think twice before fucking with what’s mine.

  I pull Mouse up next to me before turning and heading for the door. He knows something, and Mouse is right, he can’t be trusted. I saw the look in his eyes.

  “I hear you go by the name Bullet now,” he says. I stop walking as my head tilts back. To me, that almost sounds threatening.

&nbs
p; I turn around slowly, my eyes connecting with his. I see the reflection of myself. He’s as lethal as I am. I can see it all over his face.

  “You’ve created a worldthat you don’t wanna be in. If you can find out what they call me—then you know why they call me that. I wouldn’t take that name lightly, Dad—my next bullet might be yours.” His face changes in an instant. I’ve never threatened either of my parents before. I was never that kind of asshole kid either.

  He’s shocked that the words left my mouth. I’m not a kid anymore, though. I’m a grown ass man, that’s handling his business.

  “Over a girl, Jace? You’d cross this line?” he asks. My eyes mimic his. Hatred and rage.

  “She isn’t just a girl to me. You are as sick as her dad if you think I’ll let either one of you ruin her anymore.” Gritting my teeth, I can only hope he gets the picture.

  Without another word, I turn and pull Mouse out the front door with me. I can hear my mom yelling, but I can’t stop now. I need to get her out of here.

  I don’t know what it is he knows, but I’ll for damn sure be finding out.

  My first priority is to get Mouse out of here and as far from my dad as possible. The way he looked me in the eyes, I wanted to snap his neck right then and there. I didn’t care that my mom was standing there in a stunned silence. I would have done it.

  Grabbing the bag off Mouse’s shoulder, I don’t speak. I shove it into the saddle bag before grabbing the helmet and passing it to her. She doesn’t take it, though.

  She looks like she’s seen a ghost. Fuck! I brought her here. I brought her to the devil’s doorstep.

  “I had no idea what he was into. I would have never brought you here if I knew.” Mouse’s eyes come to rest on mine.

  “I know that, Jace, but I told you… he will find me.”

  She may be right about that. I may be in over my head right now.

  Chapter 40

  Mouse

  There was never a doubt in my mind that he’d find me eventually, but this quickly? I didn’t expect that. Maybe I should run. Jace said I was free to go anytime I wanted to.