A Love For Keeps (Truly Yours Digital Editions)

by Janet Lee Barton

  But the decision wasn’t hers to make, and it appeared that Nate had already made it. She prayed for the Lord to help her accept that her dreams weren’t going to come true and to not let Nate see how brokenhearted she was.

  She gave the child a hug and sent her out to show her finished dress to her papa.

  “Natalie, you look too grown-up,” Nate said. “I can see that I’m going to have to watch you closely around all those suitors who’ll be coming to our door a few years down the road.”

  “Oh, Papa,” Natalie said with a laugh. “You are silly. I don’t like any old boys, and they don’t like me. They are too busy catching frogs to notice what I’m wearing!”

  Nate laughed. “Well, that’s quite a relief. They’ll be noticing much sooner than I’ll be ready for them to.”

  “Oh, Papa!” Natalie giggled again. “Are Becca and Sarah here? May I go show them my new dress?”

  “I believe they are upstairs, but you may go, if it is all right with your papa,” Mrs. Snow said. “Be sure to get a cookie before you leave.”

  “I will. Thank you!” Natalie said as she ran into the foyer and up the stairs, calling, “Becca! Sarah!”

  Meagan was thankful that her mother remained in the room, but her relief was short lived as the knocker on the front door sounded. Her mother went to answer the door, leaving Meagan and Nate together.

  “I–I’m not sure Natalie and I are going to know what to do, now that her wardrobe is filled for this season. She’s growing much too fast to have you make anything for fall.”

  Relieved that the conversation centered on Natalie, Meagan felt herself relax a bit. “Yes, she certainly is. I did put deep hems in everything I’ve made her so that it won’t be a problem should they need to be let down.”

  “Thank you. I do appreciate that.” Nate’s glance caught hers. “Meagan, you’d mentioned once that you liked to close the shop early on Saturdays, if possible. Do you think—would you be able to go to lunch with Natalie and me and then to Basin Park to hear the concert today?”

  For a moment, Meagan’s heart sang with joy at his invitation—then it plummeted. How dare he ask her to spend the day with him and Natalie when he was practically betrothed to another woman? She steeled her heart for what she had to do, no matter how badly it pounded for her to accept his invitation.

  “No, thank you.” She knew her voice sounded very cool. The look of disappointment in his eyes was almost her undoing, but she had to remain strong if she was to avoid even more heartache. “I’ll not be able to do that.”

  Nate’s heart felt as if a vise were squeezing it. It appeared that Meagan had no interest in going out with him … yet she looked so sad. He had to ask. “Meagan, have I done anything to offend you? If so, please tell me and please forgive me.”

  “I … you …” Meagan shook her head as Natalie rushed back into the room in her new dress with Becca following close behind. She gave her attention to the girls, and Nate tried to do the same. It appeared he wasn’t going to get any answers—at least not today.

  “Becca wants a dress like this one, Miss Meg,” Natalie said as she went behind the screen.

  “Oh does she now?” Meagan asked. “I’ll see what I can do, Becca. Think about what color you would want.”

  Nate didn’t hear the rest of the conversation as Natalie went behind the screen to change and Meagan went to help.

  “Good day, Mr. Brooks,” Becca said. “Natalie said you are going to Basin Park today. She’s very excited about it.”

  “Yes, we are going after lunch. It’s quite nice out even for early June, so we’re going to take advantage of the sunny skies and balmy day.”

  “Papa?” Natalie said from behind the screen.

  “Yes, dear?”

  “Could Becca come with us?”

  Why not? Nate thought. Her sister certainly didn’t want to. He looked at Becca and could tell that she really wanted to go. “We’d love to have you come with us and share lunch with us. Sarah is welcome to come, too, if she’d like. Run ask your mother—or better yet, let’s both go ask your mother if you can accompany us.”

  “Oh, thank you, Mr. Brooks. I’ve done my chores this morning, so perhaps she’ll say yes!”

  Nate heard Natalie from behind the screen. “Do you think you could come too, Miss Meg? It’s going to be such fun!”

  He held his breath, waiting to see what Meagan said. “I’m afraid not, Natalie. But it was nice of you to ask Becca. I know she will enjoy it.”

  He followed Becca out of the room. There was no need to hear any more. The disappointment Nate felt dug deep into his heart. For whatever reason, Meagan wanted nothing to do with him socially. He was going to have to accept it and get on with his life.

  Meagan didn’t know how she managed to refuse Natalie’s invitation. She wanted to spend the afternoon with Natalie and her father. Wanted to go to lunch with them and then over to Basin Park to hear the concert. Yet it would only mean more heartache for her.

  She helped Natalie change back into the dress she’d worn to the shop and then carefully folded the outfit she’d made her and wrapped it in tissue and placed it in a bag. “I hope you’ll enjoy your new dress as much as I enjoyed making it for you. If the hem needs to be taken down, I’ll be glad to do that for you.”

  “I’ll wear it to church tomorrow!” Natalie promised.

  Meagan was relieved that her mother came back into the shop with Nate, Becca, and Sarah. That way she wouldn’t have to speak to him alone. She had no idea what to say to him anymore.

  “I have some shopping to do this afternoon,” her mother said. “I can meet you at the park and bring the girls home. That way you won’t have to go out of your way to bring them back.”

  Thank you, Mama. Meagan wasn’t sure she could face seeing Nate again that day. It hurt too much to see the look in his eyes.

  “I don’t mind bringing them home, Mrs. Snow.”

  “I know you don’t, and I appreciate your willingness to get them back, but I’ll meet you there about two, if that is all right.”

  “That will be fine. The concert should be about over by that time.”

  “I’ll see you then. Thank you again for asking them. They don’t get many outings like this.”

  “Natalie is thrilled to have some company other than her boring papa, I believe,” he said. He stood a moment as if he didn’t quite know what else to say.

  Meagan’s mother rounded up the girls and led them outside. Dear Mama, she is trying to make this all easier on me. Yet Meagan knew that nothing was going to help her heart stop aching—at least not yet, and probably not for months to come.

  Meagan handed Nate the bag with Natalie’s dress in it. “If the hem needs to be taken down, I’ll be glad to do that for this or any of her other frocks.”

  “Thank you. I’ll remember,” Nate said, taking the bag from her.

  Their fingers brushed, and the electric shock that flowed from the tips of her fingers straight to her heart astounded Meagan. She couldn’t help but wonder if Nate had felt it, too. If so, he didn’t mention it as he followed her mother and the excited girls out the door. But he turned back with a look in his eyes that almost had her changing her mind and saying she’d go with them. It was only with the Lord’s help that she bit her tongue.

  He did look disappointed—just like she felt. Only she was disappointed in him. That he could be involved with someone else and pursuing her at the same time … well, she just couldn’t understand it. She’d thought he was much more honorable than that. Still, he looked so sad.

  Could she be wrong about it all? With Abigail talking about how much time she spent with Nate and Natalie and that she expected to be married to him by next year … why would she be telling Meagan and anyone else within hearing distance about it if it weren’t true? Could she just have wanted Meagan to think that so that she wouldn’t accept Nate’s invitations?

  Surely not. No. That is just wishful thinking on my part, Meagan told he
rself. Yet … should she have done what she truly wanted to do and gone to lunch with him and Natalie? She stood at the side of the window and watched as Nate helped all of the girls into his buggy, her mother looking on.

  No. She did what she had to do for her own sake, but her heart broke as she watched him drive away.

  seventeen

  During the next couple of weeks, Nate thought about the last few months repeatedly. He didn’t see how he could have offended Meagan. He’d only wanted to see more of her. He hadn’t treated her or her family badly. He liked them much too much to do so. The only thing he could come up with that made any sense at all to him was that Meagan Snow just was not interested in him the way he was in her. Yet when she’d refused his invitation to lunch that day, she’d looked … almost as sad as he felt. Sad. How could that be, and why?

  All Nate really knew was that his dreams of a life with Meagan weren’t coming true, and he had to get on with life. It didn’t help him at all that Natalie kept asking when they were going to visit the Snows. He had no reason to take her now that Meagan had finished her wardrobe for the spring and well into the summer. He could only hope that Natalie grew enough to need the hems in her dresses let down an inch or so.

  Life seemed to have reverted back to where it was before he’d met Meagan and her family, only Nate felt his loneliness as he’d never felt it before. He was even thankful for the invitation to Abigail’s for dinner that evening.

  One thing he’d found out about himself was that he didn’t want to be alone for the rest of his life. He was extremely grateful that he had Natalie, but she would grow up, get married, and start a family of her own one day. Then he would be all by himself except for when invited to dinner or when they came to visit him.

  Nate shook his head to rid himself of his maudlin thoughts. Natalie was still a little girl, and it would be a long time before all of that happened. But even now, he longed for someone to share his life with, and he knew Natalie wanted a mother. He’d loved Rose with all his heart, and then Meagan had come along. That he was in love with her there was no doubt. But she obviously didn’t return those feelings … and he didn’t think the love he’d felt for Rose and then for Meagan would come more than twice in a lifetime. Was it possible that he could learn to care about someone enough to share his life with her? Natalie did need a mother.

  He sighed as he stopped his rig outside Abigail’s and hitched his horse to the post. He helped Natalie down and watched as she ran to her aunt’s door. He was a bit surprised when Abigail opened the door herself. She enveloped Natalie in a hug and then smiled up at him.

  “I’m so glad you could come. I haven’t seen you in several days.”

  Her words seemed balm to his battered ego. At least Abigail was glad to see him. Normally he wouldn’t have been thrilled that it was just the three of them for dinner, but tonight he was relieved that he didn’t have to put up with her friends.

  It was a surprisingly relaxed atmosphere. Instead of eating in the dining room, Abigail had set a smaller table in her parlor for just the three of them, and there was much more of a family feel to the evening than her elaborate parties. The first course was mulligatawny soup, followed by veal cutlets with brown sauce, rice, potatoes, and string beans.

  “This is very good, Aunt Abby,” Natalie said.

  “Thank you, dear. Of course, when Millie knew you were coming, she took extra care. She wondered if you would like to help her make some cookies after supper.”

  “May I? Papa loves gingersnaps. Could we make those?”

  “Of course you may. And you can take some home with you, too.”

  “Thank you, Aunt Abby!”

  Any hopes Nate had of leaving early disappeared, but Natalie was happy and excited, and he supposed there were worse things than spending an evening in Abigail’s company. Being alone and spending too much time thinking of Meagan, for instance. Perhaps it was time he thanked the Lord for the blessings he had instead of longing for something that could never be his.

  The meal was quite pleasant, and once they’d finished, Natalie ran off to help Millie in the kitchen while he and Abigail went into the parlor.

  Abigail breathed a sigh of relief. The family supper she’d planned had worked out well, and Nate seemed quite relaxed and at ease tonight. With Natalie in the kitchen with Millie, she might not have a better chance to broach the subject dearest to her heart.

  She sat down on the settee and poured coffee from the pot her housekeeper had set on the table beside her. She put just a dollop of cream and two teaspoons of sugar in the cup, just as she knew Nate liked his after-dinner coffee, and handed it to him.

  “Thank you, Abigail. Supper was delicious. And it was nice and peaceful.”

  “Did you have a bad day today, Nate? You seemed a bit dispirited when you arrived.”

  “It has been a busy week. Perhaps I’m just tired. I do appreciate that you weren’t throwing a dinner party tonight. I enjoyed the quiet evening.”

  Maybe she’d been going about things all wrong, Abigail thought. It had never occurred to her that he would enjoy a quiet, family-type meal more than one in the company of others. Maybe he was just now beginning to appreciate that kind of thing. Whatever it was, he seemed quite at ease with her, and she was going to take advantage of his mood.

  “You know, Nate, I think you are just lonely. I think you miss being married. You need a wife as much as Natalie needs a mother.”

  For once, Nate didn’t argue with her. “I’ve been thinking about that.”

  Abigail caught her breath. For a moment she was afraid she’d heard wrong and was afraid to speak. “That’s good. That you’ve been giving it some thought.”

  He nodded and took a sip from his cup.

  The thought that he might have someone—that Snow woman—in mind had her asking point-blank, “And is there someone you—”

  “No.” It came out rough and firm and told her more than she wanted to know.

  He was hurting. Something had happened, but she wasn’t going to ask about it. Instead, she was going to fight for what she wanted. She rose from the settee and went to sit on the footstool at Nate’s feet. She looked him in the eyes and spoke from her heart. “You know, Nate, you will never find anyone who cares about you and Natalie the way I do. I’ve loved you both for a very long time.”

  “Abigail—”

  “Please hear me out, Nate. Think about Rose. Can you think of anyone she would rather you marry than someone who loves you and Natalie as much as she did?” She didn’t wait for his answer but continued, afraid he’d stop her at any moment. “It’s what she would want, Nate. I know that you don’t love me the way I love you … but I will try to make you happy.”

  There. She’d done it. She’d laid her heart at his feet.

  Nate stood and pulled her to her feet. “You deserve more—”

  “No.” She shook her head. She had no time to lose. “Nate, think of Mama and Papa. They were devastated when Rose died. If you were to marry someone outside the family, they might lose some of the closeness they have with Natalie and you. And … well, married to me, you would never have to worry about your position at the bank. Think about it, Nate, dear. The best thing you could do for all of us is to marry me.”

  She held her breath, waiting to hear what he had to say, but Natalie burst into the room just then. “Papa, Aunt Abby! The cookies are nearly done. I can’t wait to taste them!”

  Abigail had never been more relieved in her life. At least she’d been saved from an outright refusal. “I can’t wait, either, Natalie, dear.”

  “Neither can I. Should we go to the kitchen and grab one hot out of the oven?”

  “Oh, let’s!” Natalie said.

  Abigail laid a hand on Nate’s arm as they headed out of the room. “Just think about it, please.”

  Her heart leaped with joy as he nodded his head. He’d listened without getting angry and without telling her no. She could only hope that her plan to come betwee
n him and Miss Snow had worked. Now, maybe, just maybe, he’d come to his senses and see that he needed to keep his love and his daughter in his wife’s family.

  For the next few days, Nate mulled over all Abigail had said. He’d been surprised when she dropped the conversation once Natalie came to get them. It was as if she’d made her best case for marriage, and she was going to let him think about it.