the Wedding (2000)

by Steel, Danielle

I'm not sure, at twenty-nine, I should have had that anyway, she had responded more than once. I've never really wanted to get married.

  That's not the point, Allegra, Dr. Green always said firmly. She was from New York, and she had big dark eyes that sometimes haunted Allegra after their sessions. They had been seeing each other off and on for four years now. Allegra was comfortable with her life, it was just that there was a lot of pressure on her, a lot of expectations from her family and her law firm, and she was very busy. Has anyone ever wanted to marry you} Dr. Green honed in more than once on what Allegra always insisted was a meaningless question.

  What difference does that make, if I don't want to get married?

  Why don't you? Why don't you want a man who wants to marry you, Allegra? What's that all about? She was relentless.

  That's just stupid. Roger would have married me, if I'd gone to London with him. I just didn't want to. I had too much going on here.

  What makes you think he'd have married you? Dr. Green was like a little ferret, she got into every corner, and sniffed out every possible lead, particle of harmless-looking dust, or insect. Did he ever say so?

  We never talked about it.

  Doesn't that make you wonder, Allegra?

  What difference does it make? That was two years ago, she would say irritably. She hated it when Dr. Green would press a point till she wore it out with her questions. This is silly. She was too young to get married anyway, and too involved in her career at the moment to think of marriage.

  And what about Brandon? Dr. Green loved harping on him. Sometimes Allegra hated discussing him with her. She just didn't understand his motivations, or how traumatized he had been by having to get married when his wife was pregnant. When is he going to file?

  When they settle the questions about the property and the money, Allegra always explained sensibly, speaking as an attorney.

  Why don't they bifurcate the financial issues, and just get a divorce? Then they can spend as long as they like resolving the property issues.

  Why? What's the point of bifurcating? It's not like we have to get married.

  No. But does he want to? Do you, Allegra? Do you ever discuss it?

  We don't need to discuss it. We understand each other perfectly. We're both busy, we both have major careers. We've only gone out for two years.

  Some people get married a lot faster than that, or a lot slower. The point is she aimed her sharp brown eyes into Allegra's green ones have you gotten yourself involved yet again with a man who cannot make a commitment?

  Of course not, Allegra answered, trying to avoid the laser gaze, but never quite succeeding. It just isn't time yet. And then Dr. Green would nod, and wait to hear what Allegra would say after.

  The exchanges were almost always the same. They had been for two years, except that Allegra was no longer twenty-seven, or twenty-eight, but twenty-nine, and Brandon had been only separated for two years now. His daughters, Nicole and Stephanie, were eleven and nine, and Joanie still hadn't succeeded in securing employment. She was still dependent on Brandon for everything she needed. And like Brandon, Allegra explained it by saying Joanie had no training. She had given up college to have Nicky.

  In fact, Nicole's voice was the next one on Allegra's answering machine, telling her that she hoped that Allegra was coming to San Francisco with her dad that weekend. She said she missed her, and that she hoped everything was okay, and she hoped they'd have time to go skating. And oh ' that's right ' I love the jacket you sent me for Christmas. ' I was going to write a note, but I forgot, and Mom said ' There was an embarrassed silence as the eleven-year-old voice tried to regain her composure. I'll give you the letter this weekend. Bye ' I love you' . Oh ' this is Nicky. Bye. She hung up, and Allegra was still smiling, when she heard Brandon's message that he was working late, and was still at the office when he called her. His message was the last one.

  She turned off the machine, finished the Evian, dropped it in the garbage, and picked up the phone to call his office.

  She was sitting on the kitchen stool with her long legs wrapped around it as she dialed. She looked long and lean and beautiful, and she was totally unaware of her looks as she called him. She had lived in a world of extraordinary-looking people for so long, and hers was a life of the mind rather than the beauty of face and body. She never thought about it, which somehow made her even more attractive. One easily sensed about her that she didn't even care how she looked, she was totally focused on the people around her.

  Brandon answered his private line on the second ring, and he sounded busy and distracted. It was easy to believe he was working. Brandon Edwards, he said, and she smiled. He had a deep, sexy voice, and she particularly liked the way he sounded. He was tall, and blond, and clean-cut, and preppy, and perhaps a little too conservative in the way he dressed, but she didn't mind that. There was something very wholesome about him, and very honest.

  Hi there, I got your message, she said cryptically, and he knew who it was the moment he heard her. How was your day?

  Endless, he said, still sounding frazzled. She didn't tell him about hers. He had very little interest in the clients of her law firm, and he always acted as though he thought her field of law was really more nonsense than legal. I'm going to trial next week. And I'm having a hell of a time with some of the research. I'll be lucky if I get out of here before midnight. He really sounded exhausted.

  Do you want me to bring you something to eat? she asked with a small smile. I could come by with a pizza.

  I'd rather wait. I've got a sandwich here now, and I don't want to stop. I'll pick something up on the way over, if it's not too late, and you still want me. She could hear something warm in his voice as she smiled in answer.

  I always want you. Come as late as you want. I brought some work home too. She had the papers for Bram Morrison's next concert tour in her briefcase. I've got plenty to do to keep me busy.

  Good, I'll see you later.

  And then she remembered. Oh, by the way, Brandon, I got a call today from Nicky. She must have gotten mixed up on the dates, she thought we were coming to San Francisco. That's next week, isn't it? The coming weekend, he was going to the Golden Globes with her, and the following weekend they were going to San Francisco to see the children.

  Actually, I ' I might have told her something about ' I thought it might make some sense to go up before the trial starts. After that, I really can't get away for a while, or at least I shouldn't. He sounded awkward as he tried to explain, and Allegra frowned as she sat looking at the view from her kitchen.

  But we can't go this week. Mom and Dad are both nominated for awards, and so are three of my clients. Among them Carmen Connors. Did you forget? She couldn't believe he'd changed his mind. She'd been talking about it since before Christmas.

  No, I just thought ' I don't have time to discuss this with you now, Allie, or I'll be stuck here all night. Why don't we talk about it later? His answer didn't put her mind to rest, and she was vague a little while later when she called her mother.

  Blaire was shooting her series all week, as usual, and she was tired at night, after hours on the set, but she was always happy to hear from her older daughter. They saw each other frequently, although less so now that Allegra was so involved with Brandon.

  Blaire reiterated the dinner invitation for Friday night, and told her that her brother, Scott, would be there. His homecomings were important to all of them, and Blaire liked nothing better than an evening with all her children.

  Is he coming to the Golden Globes too? Allegra asked, always happy to see him.

  He's going to stay home with Sam. He says award ceremonies are more fun on TV. At least he gets to see everyone he wants to, instead of being trampled by the crowd, unable to figure out who the reporters are running after.

  Maybe he's right. Allegra laughed at the description. She knew that Sam would have been thrilled to go, but her parents never wanted her in the public eye, or as seldom as possible, and certa
inly not at the Golden Globes or the Academy Awards. Every starlet in Hollywood would be there, and every possible reporter. The only reason they had ever agreed to her modeling career was because no one knew who she was when they saw her pictures. She modeled under the name of Samantha Scott, her mother's maiden name, and although her mother was well-known, it seemed less conspicuous than Steinberg. Everyone in Hollywood knew who Simon Steinberg was, and they would have done anything to take pictures of his daughter. Anyway, I'll be there, Allegra reassured her. She was no longer quite as sure that Brandon would be there, though she didn't say anything about that to her mother. But eventually Blaire asked her. It was no secret between them that Brandon was not one of Blaire's favorite people, nor Simon's. They were both concerned that Brandon had gone out with her for two years, but still hadn't divorced his wife yet.

  Will Prince Brandon be with us too? Blaire asked with an obvious edge to her voice, and Allegra hesitated for a long moment. She didn't want to get into a fight with her, but she didn't like what her mother had said, or the way she'd said it.

  I'm not sure yet, Allegra said quietly, which spoke volumes to her mother. She was always defending him, and as far as Blaire was concerned, she shouldn't have to. He's preparing for trial, and he may have to work this weekend. She didn't think it was any of her mother's business that he might be going to San Francisco to see his children.

  Don't you think he could break away for one night? Blaire asked skeptically, and the tone of her voice grated on Allegra like fingernails on a blackboard.

  Why don't you just let it go, Mom? I'm sure he'll do his best, and if he can, he'll join us.

  Maybe you should ask someone else. There's no reason for you to go alone, that's not much fun for you. It always annoyed Blaire that he left Allegra in the lurch whenever he had other plans, or too much work, or wasn't in the mood. He always did what suited him. She was always a good sport about it, and Blaire didn't see why she should be.

  I'll enjoy it either way, Allegra said comfortably. I just want to be there to see you and Daddy get the awards, she said proudly.

  Don't say that, Blaire said superstitiously, you'll jinx us. But there was very little that could jinx either Blaire Scott or Simon Steinberg. They had each won a Golden Globe Award several times before, and it was both prestigious and exciting, and in recent years, it often foretold how the Academy Awards would go in April. It was a night that meant a lot in Hollywood, and the Steinbergs were all excited about it.

  You'll win it, Mom, I know you will. You always do. The Golden Globe was unusual because it was awarded for television as well as for movies, so it was an award which both Steinbergs could win, and had. It made Allegra very proud of her parents.

  Never mind the flattery. Her mother smiled, proud of her daughter too. Allegra was a terrific girl, and she and Blaire shared a special bond, which had always kept them close together. What about Friday night? Can you come to dinner?

  I'll have to let you know tomorrow, if that's all right. She wanted to discuss Brandon's plans with him, and see what he wanted to do about San Francisco. If he stayed, then she wanted him to join them for dinner at her parents', but she thought it might be easier to negotiate all at once, so she put the conversation off till morning, and they chatted for a few minutes about Scott and Sam, and her father. Blaire explained after that that she was introducing a new character on the show, and the idea had been very well received by the network. At fifty-four, she was still beautiful, and full of exciting new ideas. She loved what she did, and she had had another show before this one on the same network. And for the past nine years, she had had incredible success with her current show, called Buddies. But the ratings had wavered a little that year, and there was no doubt in anyone's mind how much the Golden Globes would help them. This time, Blaire really wanted to win it.

  Blaire Scott had Allegra's long, lean looks, and a model's body, and her hair had been naturally red, but it had long since faded to a warm strawberry-blond that actually needed very little help from the bottle. She had had her eyes done once, and her neck tightened a few years before, but she had never had her face lifted. She was the envy of all her friends, and watching her age so gracefully gave Allegra a lot of hope for the future. The secret is not doing too much, she always said matter-of-factly to her daughters about plastic surgery. But Allegra always swore she'd never do it. She thought it was a waste of time to try and tackle nature. Wait a few years, you'll feel differently, Blaire said wisely. She'd said the same thing, but finally at forty-three, in the public eye more than she'd planned, she'd done the eyes, and then the neck at fifty. And as a result, she looked barely more than forty-five now. It ruins everything when people know how old you are, she teased Allegra at times, but she had no real desire to conceal her age, just to remain attractive to Simon. At sixty, he was still the handsome man he had always been. If anything he looked better now, she said, than he did when they were married.

  You lie, he always grinned winningly when she said that. Allegra loved being with them. They were kind, intelligent, happy people, and they made everyone around them feel good.

  I want a man like him, she had said once to Dr. Green, and then feared that Dr. Green would get all caught up in Freud, but surprisingly, she hadn't.

  I'd say that's a pretty good decision, from what you've told me of your parents' marriage. Do you think you could attract a man like him? Dr. Green had asked her bluntly.

  Sure, Allegra said easily, but they both knew she didn't mean it.

  Allegra promised to call her mother about dinner on Friday night as soon as she knew her plans, and after that she thought about calling Nicole, and then decided against it. Joanie probably wouldn't like it. So instead, eating a half-eaten yogurt from the fridge, Allegra called Carmen. She sounded completely hysterical, as she always did, whenever a fresh story hit the tabloids. But even she had to agree that this one was silly. They claimed that she had attended an orgy in Las Vegas with her plastic surgeon. Supposedly he had given her a whole new face, new nose, new chin, breast implants, and liposuction.

  How could I have done all that? she asked, aghast, still surprisingly naive, and always shocked to realize to what extent people were willing to lie about her. Like all celebrities, people claimed they'd gone to school with her, were best friends with her, had taken trips with her, and of course the number of men claiming to have slept with her were legion. Recently, even two women had made that claim, and Carmen had been reduced to tears over that too. It just seemed incredibly unfair to her that people were so willing to make up stories about her.

  It's the price of success, Allegra always reminded her gently, finding it difficult to believe that she was only six years older than Carmen. The young star seemed so naive in so many ways, so unaware of the evil lurking everywhere, and surprised by the extent of the exploitation. She still wanted to believe that everyone was her friend, and no one wanted to hurt her. Except at two A.M., when she easily believed that half of Los Angeles was at her back door and about to break in and rape her. Allegra had hired a live-in housekeeper for her finally, and told Carmen to leave a light on outside her bedroom. She was afraid of the dark, and she was always scared to death of what she couldn't see just beyond her bedroom.

  Listen. Allegra reassured her again about the article in Chatter. You're not old enough to have had all that work done.

  Do you suppose anyone else will figure that out? All I did was have a mole removed on my forehead, she said miserably, blowing her nose again, thinking of all the things her grandmother had said when she called from Portland. She said that Carmen had shamed them all, and that God would never forgive her.

  Of course they'll figure it out. Did you read the next page?

  No, why? Carmen asked, stretching her perfect figure out on the couch, as she held the phone and talked to Allegra.

  On the next page it probably says that a woman gave birth to identical quintuplets on Mars. And two pages after that a woman gave birth to a monkey
on a UFO. If they believe that crap, then who cares if they say you had a face-lift at twenty-three? To hell with them, Carmen. You've got to toughen up a little bit, or they'll drive you crazy.

  They are, she said forlornly. They talked for an hour, and finally Allegra hung up and went to take a shower, and by the time she got out and was drying her hair, Brandon pulled into the driveway.

  She was at the door in a terry-cloth robe as he came up the walk, her hair was hanging down her back, wet, and her face was scrubbed clean of makeup. In some ways she was even more beautiful than when she was all done up, and he liked it when she looked natural and clean and sexy.

  Wow! he said, and then kissed her hello, as he followed her inside and she locked the door behind them. It was ten o'clock at night, and he looked exhausted as he dropped his briefcase in the front hall and put his arms around her. This was definitely worth working late for, he said, kissing her, and slipping a hand inside the terry-cloth robe. She was naked beneath it.

  Are you hungry? she asked him between kisses.

  Starved, he answered, referring to her, not dinner.

  What would you like? she asked, laughing at him, as she entwined her legs around his playfully, and took off his jacket.

  Breast, I think ' or maybe leg' . he said hoarsely, and then kissed her again, and a minute later they were sitting on her bed, as he unbuttoned his shirt and looked at her with eyes filled with desire. He looked tired, after his long day, but his spirits didn't seem to be dampened. He didn't even want to talk to her, he just wanted to devour her body.

  She helped him take off his shirt, and he slipped out of his pants, and a few minutes later they were both naked, lying on her bed, and making love in the soft lights she had left on. He was totally enraptured with her, and an hour later they both lay spent and pleased, and as she started to drift off to sleep, she felt him get up, and it woke her.

  Where are you going? she asked, rolling over and opening an eye to look at him in all his long, tall, blond splendor. They were well matched, and their looks were so similar that sometimes people thought they were brother and sister.