Grim Tempest

by Amanda M. Lee

  “She’s right,” I added. “If we were being indecent we would’ve stripped off our tops and showed you our boobs. Now that would’ve been indecent.”

  “Especially on her part.” Angelina jerked her thumb in my direction. “Her boobs are infested with scabies and are frightening to even the most hard up individuals on the streets.”

  Green pursed his lips. “I don’t want to be part of this conversation.”

  I didn’t blame him. “Leave him alone, Angelina,” I ordered. “He’s trying to be nice, but your foul stench is knocking him for a loop. Next time you pick a perfume, try something different from Eau de Crotchrot.”

  “All right, that will be enough of that.” Green, finally at his limit, strode forward until he stood between Angelina and me. He gestured toward the woman and indicated she should step ahead of Angelina in the line. “Ma’am, why don’t you go ahead?” He let loose a charming smile. “I’ll stay behind and talk to these two … ladies … and see if we can’t come to a meeting of the minds. How does that sound?”

  “I would rather you arrest them,” the woman sniffed, giving Angelina a wide berth as she stepped around her. “I guess I’ll have to take what I can get. I’ll definitely be writing your boss a letter telling him how ineffective you are, so be prepared for that.”

  Green managed to keep his smile in place, although just barely. “Yes, ma’am.”

  I eyed Green for a long beat as the line shuffling finished and then exhaled heavily as I searched for something to say. Our relationship was never going to be easy. He thought I was a murderer and that I somehow managed to hide it. I thought he was the world’s biggest turd – even larger than Angelina and her fake boobs – but that was neither here nor there. I was in a precarious position because I’d been with his dead boss the day before.

  “So, I hear your boss bit the big one yesterday,” I offered. As far as openings go, it wasn’t going to earn a spot on my greatest hits list.

  Green’s eyebrows winged up. “How did you hear that?”

  “My boyfriend is a cop,” I reminded him, briefly worrying that news hadn’t broken yet. If the story hadn’t reached the newspapers I’d look suspicious if I had too much knowledge. I was lucky to have a boyfriend in law enforcement, so I decided to use it to my advantage. “He told me when word started to spread.”

  “Oh.” Green seemed to swallow my lie, which was a good thing. “I guess that makes sense. I didn’t realize the other departments were already hearing word of his passing. It’s difficult all around. I guess it’s good he’s being remembered.”

  “Yes. It’s always good to be remembered.” I flicked a dismissive look to Angelina. “You, for example, will be remembered as the woman with the worst case of ass crabs the tri-county area has ever seen.” I grinned when she frowned. “Did you see how I carried that thread from one subject to another? That’s how you win an insult war.”

  “Whatever.” Angelina didn’t bother to hide her eye roll as she focused on Green and extended her hand. “I’m Angelina Davenport. It’s nice to meet you.”

  Green introduced himself, a real smile playing at the corner of his lips as he took in Angelina’s pale countenance. He probably thought there was a chance he might get lucky – which was true because Angelina never met a man she didn’t want to jump and use for whatever he could give her – but he didn’t seem to notice the dark shadows under her eyes or the way her shoulders slumped as she shuffled forward in line.

  “I’m sorry you have to put up with Aisling,” Angelina offered. “She’s the world’s worst person, and I pity anyone who feels compelled to talk to her. I’m assuming you’re thinking of arresting her for something. That’s the only reason someone as smart and charming as you could possibly want to share a discussion with the antichrist.”

  I mimed puking at Angelina’s flirting attempt. “He doesn’t want to date you. The Royal Oak Police Department frowns on their officers coming down with a venereal disease and putting the public at risk. That means you’re out of the running.”

  Green slid in smoothly and took over the conversation before Angelina, who looked furious, could respond. That was probably a good thing. “So how do you guys know each other?”

  “We went to high school together,” Angelina replied, changing course. “It was the worst four years of my life. She was awful.”

  “Oh, don’t try to pretend like you graduated in four years,” I chided. “It took her six years, Detective Green. She got held back after giving the principal, gym teacher, band leader and Spanish instructor gonorrhea.”

  Angelina let loose with a growl. “The gym teacher was a woman.”

  “See,” I said to Green. “She’s not denying she’s an equal opportunity slut. You should run away as fast as you can.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind,” Green said dryly. “I’m guessing the animosity between the two of you is legitimate. At first I thought it was a game, but you clearly seem to hate one another.”

  “Oh, we definitely hate each other,” I intoned. “I could never like a woman who goes years without shaving her armpits. Who knows, though? You might like that.”

  Angelina glared at me, hostility rolling off her. “I’ve had about enough of your mouth.”

  “That’s good. I felt the same way about you ten years ago. You’re finally catching up.”

  Green held up his hands to silence us. “Listen, I don’t want to get in the middle of … well, whatever this is,” he said. “Chick fights are only hot on television. So, you have two choices: You can keep doing what you’re doing and then find someone to pay bail once I arrest you or you can stop and let things go.”

  “I’m fine with being arrested,” I offered. “It would hardly be the first time. My father keeps bail money handy.”

  “That’s because your father is a moron,” Angelina said. “He’s always spoiled you rotten even though you’re the world’s worst human being.”

  “That insult lacked a little zip,” I noted. “You might want to load up on caffeine and try again.”

  “I’d appreciate if you wouldn’t do that,” Green interrupted. “In fact, I want this conversation to be over with. You’re disturbing the clientele. With that in mind, Ms. Davenport, why don’t you let me buy you a coffee and we’ll take a seat in the corner over there?” He gestured to the dark corner on the far side of the shop. There were no open seats anywhere near it. “Then, Ms. Grimlock, you can buy your own coffee and do … whatever it is you do.”

  Angelina beamed at Green, clearly happy to be his chosen coffee date. “That sounds fantastic.”

  Green returned the smile. “Great.” He spared me one last glance. “Try to behave yourself.”

  That was easier said than done. And, as I watched Angelina and Green chat each other up while waiting for their coffee orders, seemingly in their own little world as they steadfastly tried to ignore me, I couldn’t tamp down the worry niggling at the back of my brain.

  There was no way this could be construed as good, right? I didn’t think so.

  6

  Six

  I finished with my two charges before lunch. It was a slow day, which was fine with me, and I was considering returning home to catch an episode of General Hospital and eat potato chips when my phone dinged with a calendar alert.

  I frowned at the readout when I realized exactly why my schedule was so light. It had been planned two weeks before and I’d forgotten about it. Well, to be fair, it was more that I’d purposely willed the appointment out of my mind.

  “Oh, well, great.” I growled and tapped my foot on the pavement as I internally debated if I could get out of the appointment. As if on cue, my phone rang. “Hello?”

  “Good afternoon, love of my life,” Griffin said cheerily, setting my teeth on edge. “As per our agreement two weeks ago, it’s my job to remind you that you have your dress fitting this afternoon and no matter what, you can’t duck out of it.”

  Most future husbands wouldn’t understand my
aversion to wedding dress shopping, but Griffin found it funny. When Jerry set the appointment and insisted I would be forced to die if I attempted to wiggle out, it seemed like a good idea to put Griffin on the case. He wouldn’t allow me to forget, which was exactly why I was getting this call.

  “You put the dress fitting in my calendar, didn’t you?”

  “I did,” Griffin confirmed, seemingly unruffled by my tone. “I put an alert on my phone, too, but I was worried I might be tied up with a case so I programmed your phone first so we were doubly covered. Surprise … and you’re welcome.”

  “I didn’t thank you.”

  “You will later. I’m thinking you will thank me with kisses and sex.”

  Even though I was agitated, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing at his bravado. “Oh, well, is that what you think?”

  “Yup.”

  “What if I decide to duck out of my appointment?”

  “I don’t care what you wear to get married,” Griffin replied. “You can be naked for all I care. It doesn’t matter to me. It does, however, matter to Jerry and your mother. You have to weigh your aversion to seamstresses poking and measuring you against a disappointed mother and best friend.”

  “I don’t really care what my mother thinks,” I grumbled.

  “You care what Jerry thinks. Also, now that he’s had a bit of time to chew on the situation, you might be able to talk to him about his fight with Aidan.”

  I balked. “I don’t want to do that. He’ll turn it into a big deal.”

  “You guys turn everything into a big deal,” Griffin pointed out. “I think he needs a friend, and because you’re his best friend, I believe it’s your duty to listen to him fret.”

  Sadly, I knew Griffin was right. Jerry never had a problem listening when I complained. He deserved the same from me. I heaved out a resigned sigh. “Fine. I’ll go. If the taffeta strangles me, though, and I don’t make it to the wedding, I want you to remember this is all your fault.”

  Griffin chuckled. “I’ll take my chances. Did anything else happen today, by the way? Are you still working on your evil storm theory or have you moved on to something else?”

  Oddly enough I was so busy during the morning I didn’t have time to dwell on the storm hypothesis. “I haven’t decided on that yet. I did have another issue arise this morning, though, and I don’t think it’s a fortuitous turn of events.”

  I told him about my exchange with Angelina, not leaving anything out because he genuinely enjoyed hearing whatever insults I came up with in the spur of the moment, and I wrapped up with Angelina’s coffee tete-a-tete with Mark Green.

  “So basically it’s as if my worst enemies have joined together to bring me down,” I concluded. “I don’t think it’s going to turn out to be a good thing.”

  Griffin was so silent on the other end of the call I thought I might’ve inadvertently dropped it.

  “Are you still there?”

  Griffin stirred. “I’m here. I’m just thinking about what you said. I’m not sure that Angelina is much of a threat to you, but she does have certain information about your family that makes me uncomfortable. If she shares that with Green … well … it might force him to look more closely at you.”

  I hadn’t considered that. “Angelina doesn’t know everything,” I argued. “She only knows bits and pieces.”

  “She knows enough that we would have real trouble explaining it. She was there for the whole mirror monster thing. She was also there when a wraith attacked at Grimlock Manor, and she saw you take it out.”

  Crap. I’d forgotten all about that. “Yeah, but if she tells Green that stuff he’ll think she’s a loon,” I said after a beat. “Even if he’s predisposed to think I’m a murderer – which he is – he’s not simply going to believe we’re reapers because Angelina says it. He’s much too practical for that.”

  “I think you’re right, but it’s a situation I want to watch all the same.”

  That made two of us. “Well, there’s nothing more we can do about it today. Have you heard anything else on Peter?”

  “Not so far, but I’ll keep you updated. If the doctor blames it on evil storms, you’ll be the first to know.”

  I didn’t find his sarcastic tone attractive in the least. “Great. I can’t wait.” Two could play the sarcasm game. “I have to go. Jerry will be early, and if I’m late he’ll have a meltdown.”

  “And we don’t want that. Try to talk to him while you’re there, maybe see if you can calm him down. I’m sure everything will be better by tonight.”

  “I certainly hope so.”

  “Me, too. Have fun. I love you.”

  “I love you, too.”

  JERRY WAS WAITING FOR me in the dress shop’s lobby when I arrived. I was only two minutes late, which is the same as being early in my world, but he didn’t look happy when I breezed through the door.

  “Where have you been? I was starting to get worried.”

  I glanced at the clock on the wall and cocked an eyebrow. “I was crossing town. I thought speeding up and getting into an accident was probably the wrong way to go so I followed traffic laws instead. Forgive me for my stupidity.”

  Jerry ignored the sarcasm and held up a garment bag. “Try this on.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “What is that?”

  “Your dress.”

  “I haven’t picked out a dress,” I reminded him. “We agreed on three that were supposed to be sent here in my size so I could try them on and then we were going to go from there.”

  “Yes, well, this is the one I like.”

  I was torn. I understood he was upset. He looked it. His big eyes, always so full of life, looked dull, and the misery wafting off him was enough to almost crush me. That didn’t mean I had any intention of letting him bully me into a dress I would hate.

  “I want to see them for myself.” I was firm as I walked forward and snagged the garment bag. I unzipped the top and poked my nose in, fighting the urge to gag the moment I saw the overflow of lace and beadwork. “Absolutely not. This was not on my list of approved dresses.”

  “I know.” Jerry planted his hands on his hips. “I added one. I didn’t think you were getting the full picture of how perfect it would be for you so I decided to add it. I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d make a fuss.”

  “I’ll still make a fuss,” I warned, shoving the dress at him. “I’m not wearing that.”

  “Why not?” Jerry adopted a pitiable tone. “I think it’s beautiful and you’ll look beautiful in it, Bug. Why won’t you just try it on for me?”

  “Because I’m going to hate it and it’s going to make me want to punch you,” I automatically answered, instantly hating myself when I saw the shift on Jerry’s features.

  “Oh, well, you don’t have to try it on,” Jerry said primly, setting the dress aside. “I was overreaching. Um … try on your other dresses.” He sat on the couch next to the elevated area with the mirrors. “Pick whichever one you want.”

  I grabbed the nearest garment bag from the rack and fixed Jerry with a worried look. I knew I should say something – other than the absolutely moronic thing I’d already said – but I was too uncomfortable. I needed to gather my thoughts first. “I’ll be right back.”

  Jerry flashed a smile that didn’t make it all the way to his eyes. “I’ll be waiting.”

  I drew the dressing room curtain and kicked off my shoes, silently lambasting myself for saying something so stupid to my best friend. I barely paid any attention to the dress as I tugged it on. By the time I stepped out I was ready to tackle the situation head-on.

  “You look fantastic,” Jerry gushed, jumping to his feet and directing me toward the mirrors. “Look at you. All you need is a tiara and you’ll look like a princess.”

  I growled. “No tiara.”

  Jerry pretended he didn’t hear me. “You’re a vision.”

  I shifted my eyes to the mirror and took in my reflection. Jerry seemed excited by what he saw
, but I was of the opinion that I resembled a large Q-tip more than anything else. “I don’t know,” I hedged, shifting so I could study the lace overlay at the back of the overblown frock. “I don’t like that. It looks weird.”

  Jerry skewered me with a glare. “How can you possibly not like the back of that dress? It’s classic, elegant, and the dress isn’t so white that it washes you out. It’s absolutely perfect.”

  The fact that he believed that made me wonder if he knew me at all. “Jerry, there’s a big bow on my ass and it makes me look emaciated on the top here because I don’t have enough boobs to fill it out.”

  Jerry rolled his eyes. “It’s a sample size, Bug. The dress will be brought in at the top to fit you.”

  I didn’t think that would help. “I don’t like it.”

  “Ugh.” Jerry heaved a sigh. “Fine. Put on the next one. Maybe we’ll have an easier time with that.”

  Once I was out of the lace monstrosity I grabbed the second bag and tugged on the dress. It was less garish than the first, but only barely. I wasn’t all that concerned with my dress. but I was legitimately worried about Jerry, so I decided to be more forceful the second time I exited the dressing room.

  “So, as I was saying, I’m sorry about what I said.”

  Jerry pressed his hand to his heart and blinked back tears. “You’re an absolute vision, Bug.” He blew me an exaggerated kiss and dabbed at his eyes. “I mean … there’s never been a prettier bride.”

  I dubiously stepped in front of the mirrors and almost jolted at my own reflection when I realized the circumference of the skirt was bigger than a circle made up entirely of my brothers. “No way!”

  “Yes way.” Jerry moved next to me so he could tug on the back of the dress to tighten it around my breasts. “See. It looks absolutely lovely. You need a tiara with this dress. It also needs a veil.”

  I grimaced at my reflection. “I look like that woman from that scary story we used to tell,” I complained. “What was her name again? Bloody Mary. That’s it. That’s exactly who I look like.”