Cruel Love

by Kate Brian

  “Whoo! Nice one!” Maria said, raising her hand for a high five.

  Ariana had never high-fived anyone in her life. Now she shrugged one shoulder and slapped Maria’s hand. They both laughed. They looked into one another’s eyes and suddenly, Ariana couldn’t stop smiling.

  “I see what you mean about needing to hit something,” Maria said, getting poised for another return. “I already feel loads better.”

  Ariana took a quick swig of water from her water bottle, then returned to the service line. “Then we should do this more often.”

  Maria grinned. “Works for me.”

  Ariana grinned back and, feeling suddenly like she had been crazy to ever worry that anything could really go wrong, she tossed the ball up to serve.

  THE DUNGEON

  Ariana sat at a table in the Georgetown dining hall on Wednesday morning, her nose buried in her Atherton-Pryce chemistry book, which was definitely hefty enough to pass as a college text. To any casual passerby, she looked like a student who had pulled an all-nighter and was now nursing a coffee and getting in some last-minute cramming. In fact, every ounce of her attention was tuned to the conversation taking place at the table behind her.

  “I can’t believe she’s really dead,” Reed said, sniffling. “We figured she’d just met some hot guy and disappeared to Tahiti for a few weeks.”

  Ariana smiled sadly. That did sound like Kiran.

  “I’m so sorry, Reed,” one of her friends said.

  Ariana had seen Reed walk in, all red-nosed, wearing a baggy Georgetown sweatshirt and no makeup, surrounded by concerned tomboys. She imagined one of them putting an arm around her now, giving her a supportive squeeze. As if Kiran and Reed had ever really been friends. Ariana had known Kiran much longer, and if Reed could have heard some of the crap Kiran had talked about her and her wardrobe behind her back, she wouldn’t be so mournful right now.

  “I wonder how it happened,” another friend chimed in.

  Ariana’s ears perked up as Reed scoffed derisively.

  “My friend Noelle heard she was really wasted at the Halloween party she was at,” she said. “Classic Kiran. Apparently the police think she must have been so drunk she tripped and fell in the water,” she added, her tone bitter.

  Ariana let out a sigh of relief unlike any other. If this was true, she was in the clear. Thank you, Kiran, for your hedonistic ways. But then a sour taste filled her mouth, tempering her happiness as Reed’s comment about Noelle really hit her. So. Reed and Noelle were still friends.

  “Crap. I have to get to class,” one of Reed’s entourage said. A chair scraped back. “Hey … you guys are going to that team breakfast thing on Friday, right?”

  There was a chorus of assenting murmurs.

  “I can’t,” Reed said. “I’m so behind in bio and I’ve got that lab due on Friday morning. I’m going to be spending every free second in the lab until first session starts.”

  “You’re going to the dungeon, alone, before class on a Friday?” one of the friends asked incredulously. “Are you crazy?”

  “I know. That place freaks me out even in the middle of the day,” Reed replied. “But I have to ace this lab. It’s, like, fifty percent of my final grade.”

  A sizzle of anticipation shot up and down Ariana’s arms. This dungeon lab place sounded like a perfect location for her purposes. And from the tone of the friend’s voice, it would be completely deserted early on a Friday morning, which made perfect sense. Thursday night was the requisite party night on college campuses. Only a loser with no life would drag themselves out of bed before dawn on a Friday and into a lab. A loser like Reed. Ariana would have to check out this so-called dungeon after Reed went to class today. But if it was as cold and dark and quiet and windowless as she was currently imagining … she’d just caught the break she’d been hoping for.

  A LOCK

  “Are you nervous?” Jasper asked Ariana, sliding into the chair next to hers in the dining hall that night.

  The very word “nervous” sent a whole new shockwave of prickling discomfort over Ariana’s shoulders and down her arms. In just a few hours the Stone and Grave vote would finally take place. She’d thought of little else all day, but he didn’t need to know that. Ariana took a deep breath and shrugged casually.

  “Not at all,” she said, reaching for a warm roll from the basket at the center of the table. The waiter had yet to come and take her order, but it was no matter. She was certain she wouldn’t be able to eat much anyway.

  “Liar.” Jasper planted a kiss on her cheek as he stashed his leather messenger bag under the table. “Personally, I think you’re a lock.”

  Ariana’s eyebrows shot up. “You do? What have you heard?”

  “Nothing really. But why would anyone not vote for you?” Jasper replied, flicking his napkin into his lap.

  Ariana shook her head with a smile. “You’re my boyfriend. You have to say that,” she whispered, eyeing Palmer and Landon as they strode by. Landon lifted his hand briefly in greeting, but Palmer didn’t even cast a glance in their direction.

  “Cocky bastard. He deserves to be brought down a peg,” Jasper muttered.

  Ariana clenched her teeth, recalling the look in Palmer’s eyes as he’d accused her the night before. “I couldn’t agree more.”

  April dropped into the chair across from Jasper’s, struggling to detangle the straps of the tote bag, duffel, and backpack she was carrying. She finally got it all organized, shoved the bags under her chair, and took a deep breath.

  “Ready for tonight?” she asked Ariana.

  “Ready as I’m gonna be,” Ariana replied.

  April touched the silverware lined up next to her plate, straightening them into right angles. “I have to admit, Ana, up until last night I was still on the fence about the vote,” she said, sitting up straight and shaking her curls back from her face. “I mean, you are new and all. But there’s no way I can vote for a jerk like him,” she said, casting a derisive look in Palmer’s direction as he settled in at a table near the end of the row. “And the way you handled it? Perfection.”

  “Thanks,” Ariana said, blushing as she looked down at her lap.

  “Wait a minute. What happened last night?” Jasper asked, angling toward Ariana in his chair. “What did the jerk do?”

  “Nothing,” Ariana said quickly, shaking her head.

  “Oh, bollocks. It was not nothing,” April said. She placed her elbows on the table and leaned in toward Jasper. “Tosser basically intimated that Ana here had done something to cause Lexa’s death.”

  “What?” Jasper blurted, instantly turning red. “Are you serious?”

  “It was nothing,” Ariana said under her breath, not wanting to dwell on this particular subject for any longer than strictly necessary. “He’s just upset.”

  “So is everyone else at this school!” Jasper shot back. “That doesn’t give him the right to—”

  He started to get up, but Ariana placed her hand atop his thigh and shoved him back down as hard as she could. “Jasper, please. I just want to drop this. Let’s not do anything to distract from the election tonight, okay?”

  “She’s right. If you kick his sorry arse, he might get a sympathy vote,” April said, tearing into a roll.

  Ariana smirked. As much as she loved Jasper, she was pretty sure that superstar athlete Palmer Liriano would triumph in a fistfight. But April’s confidence was a nice ego stroke for Jasper and it seemed to calm him down.

  “Fine,” he said, blowing out a sigh. “But now you have to win tonight.”

  “Oh, don’t worry,” April said, lifting her water glass. “I’ve been telling all the girls in S and G how Palmer’s been treating Ana. I don’t think there’s a single female that isn’t voting for her.”

  “Yeah?” Ariana asked hopefully. Her heart felt all warm and light. Could this really happen? Could she really be the next president of Stone and Grave?

  “Yes. You’re definitely going to win,” April s
aid, tilting the glass toward Ariana in a toast. “And winning is the best revenge.”

  THE COUP

  “We all know why we’re here,” April said, after calling the Stone and Grave meeting to order. “Before we get on with the meeting, you should all know that our current vice president, Brother Starbuck, has asked that, since I initiated the process, I run the elections.”

  April cast a sardonic look in Palmer’s direction, and Ariana knew exactly what it was meant to convey. Already April believed that Palmer was unfit to be president of their chapter, but his inability or unwillingness to step up to the plate tonight had sealed it. Palmer, meanwhile, sat slumped against the wall, his jeans and sneakers sticking out from under his bunched-up black robe. He gazed into a candle flame off to his right, his expression blank, as if there was nothing and no one else in the room.

  “But first, let’s all take a moment of silence for our sister, Lexa Greene,” April said. “Forever in our hearts.”

  “Forever in our hearts,” the brotherhood responded as one.

  Ariana stared down at the floor. Her heart pounded an excited, anticipatory beat, and she felt uncomfortably like she had to pee. As much as she wanted to honor Lexa, she needed to get on with the vote. Each slowly passing minute of the day had meant an uptick in her tension level. By the time she, Tahira, and Maria had set out from Privilege House to walk down to the Tombs together, she had felt like she could barely breathe. Even with April’s complete confidence that she would win, Ariana felt as if the chips were stacked against her. With Lexa gone and Soomie still MIA, there were fewer girls than guys in Stone and Grave. Even if she did land every single female vote, it wouldn’t be enough. She’d need at least three guys to win. She’d been doing the math over and over all evening, giving herself a stabbing headache in the process. Now, whatever the outcome, she just wanted to have it over with. She wanted to know.

  And yes, she wanted to win.

  “Thank you,” April said. Around the room, dozens of faces lifted. “And now, I will read the list of nominees.”

  “Brother Starbuck, do you accept your nomination?” she asked.

  All eyes in the room turned to Palmer. He nodded. A movement so minuscule Ariana wasn’t sure if it was real or a trick of light.

  “So noted,” April said with a frustrated sigh. She made a mark in her notebook.

  “Sister Portia, do you accept your nomination?” April asked.

  Suddenly Palmer’s head snapped up. His gaze found Ariana’s in the circle, and he sat up straight, pushing himself away from the wall and toward the circle. Clearly, no one had told him that she was nominated. Ariana found his obvious shock highly gratifying.

  “I do,” she said clearly, her voice strong.

  “Thank you,” April said. She made her note, then looked around. “At this time, it is my duty to open up the floor to any last-minute nominations,” she said. “Let me remind you of the gravity of this decision. Tonight we will elect the person who will be our president for the remainder of the school year.” She made eye contact with each and every brother and sister in the circle, driving her message home. “You must choose the person you think best exemplifies the values of the Stone and Grave. The person you would like to have representing us to the alumni. Now. Are there any further nominations?”

  Christian Thacker raised his hand.

  “Yes, Brother Darcy?”

  Ariana’s heart was in her throat. Palmer looked betrayed. Christian was really going to nominate someone else? Now? What was he trying to do, give her a coronary?

  “I nominate Brother Lear,” Christian said.

  “No.” Conrad’s voice filled the room so utterly, Ariana flinched. “I’m sorry, Brother Darcy, but trust me, I’m not the best person for the job right now.” He shifted, pulling his legs up story style under his robe and casting a sidelong glance at Palmer.

  Ariana’s pulse grew shallow and quick. What did that look mean? Was he not running in order to throw his support behind Palmer? Or did he think that Palmer should withdraw his nomination as well, since they were both in mourning? Ariana swallowed hard, hoping it was the latter.

  Please, please, please let Conrad be on my side, she thought suddenly. With Conrad on my side, I really have a chance.

  “All right then,” April said. “For those of you who are new to this, we have open voting in Stone and Grave. There are no secrets among the brotherhood. I will call each of your names and you will answer with the name of the person for whom you wish to vote.”

  Ariana gripped the sides of her robe with both hands. Open voting? So she’d know who voted for her and who didn’t. She’d be able to keep track. Suddenly her pulse throbbed so loudly she could hardly hear herself think. What was she supposed to say at her turn? Should she vote for herself, or do the mature, valiant thing and vote for Palmer?

  She stared at her former love from across the circle. His jaw was set in a babyish pout, his fists stuffed under his arms. She remembered the way he’d attacked her in the hospital, in front of everyone, and then again in the common room. She suddenly felt so disgusted that she wasn’t certain she’d be able to utter his name if she tried. There was a good possibility she’d gag on it first.

  “We start with the newest members so that they can’t be influenced by the votes of their elders,” April continued, looking at Jasper. “So let’s begin. Brother Amory Blaine?”

  Jasper cleared his throat. “Sister Portia.”

  Palmer stared flaming daggers across the circle at Jasper. Ariana was certain he had been counting on the male vote the same way she was counting on the female vote.

  “Brother Oliver Twist?”

  Adam averted his eyes from Palmer’s, looking at the stone floor. He picked at a fraying thread on the hem of his robe.

  “Sister Portia.”

  Palmer’s angry exhalation was audible throughout the room. Ariana’s heart soared. Even though Adam had seconded her nomination, she hadn’t been certain that she’d win his vote. He and Palmer went way back, and Palmer was part of the reason Adam, a scholarship student, had bothered applying to Atherton-Pryce at all. Still, Ariana should have known Adam would vote his conscience. He’d always been a brave and honorable guy.

  April made a note in her book, and Ariana started to feel like she already had this thing won. Two guys had voted for her. If all the girls stayed on her side and she got one more guy, that was all she’d need.

  Landon was next. Seated next to Ariana, he suddenly became unnaturally still.

  “Brother Pip?” April said.

  “Brother Starbuck,” he said clearly.

  It was all Ariana could do to keep from glaring at him. She’d known she’d never win his vote, but for some reason, hearing it out loud felt like a betrayal.

  “Sister Portia?” April said.

  Ariana held her breath. She knew that voting for Palmer would be the honorable thing to do, especially with everyone listening, but this election might come down to one vote. She had no interest in losing this battle for herself.

  “Sister Portia,” she said, her voice firm.

  Luckily, no one flinched. April moved on to Tahira, who voted for Ariana, then continued around the circle with the more seasoned members. As Maria had predicted, every single girl voted for Ariana. She kept a running tally on her hands, curling a finger on her right for each of her votes, on her left for each of Palmer’s, then starting over again, trying to keep track of the five-vote increments in her mind. The whole way, they were dead even. Finally, the vote came to Rob Mellon. All day, Ariana had gone back and forth over Rob, wondering whether he would go against Palmer. His girlfriend, Tahira, had been the one to nominate Ariana, after all, but he was also one of Palmer’s best friends.

  “Brother Von Hardwigg?” April said.

  Rob glanced over at Tahira, then away. “Brother Starbuck.”

  Damn, Ariana thought.

  Only Maria, Conrad, Palmer, and April were left. That meant that only Conrad coul
d save her. He and Palmer had always been friends. What if Lexa’s death had bonded them, rather than torn them apart? What if their shared grief had solidified their brotherhood?

  If it had, Ariana would lose. But she couldn’t lose. The Stone and Grave presidency was huge. It would open up opportunities she could scarcely even imagine. If she could win this, she’d be set for life. She’d never have to worry about anything ever again. Her mouth was dry and clammy as the vote came to Maria.

  “Sister Estell—”

  “Sister Portia,” Maria interjected, not letting April finish her name.

  The note was made. The vote came to Conrad. “Brother Lear?”

  Ariana stared at Conrad. He clasped his hands together and rested his chin against them. His elbows wide on his knees, he leaned forward and let out a sigh.

  Please say Sister Portia, please say Sister Portia, please say …

  “I cast my vote for …” He paused and looked over at Palmer. Palmer gazed back confidently. Slowly, Ariana’s heart sank. The guy code was too strong. Conrad was going to vote for Palmer. “Sister Portia,” he said finally.

  Jasper let out a whoop, and a few people laughed, while others twittered nervously. It seemed Ariana wasn’t the only one keeping a running score. And as long as April voted for her, she’d just won Stone and Grave.

  “Brother Starbuck?” April asked.

  “Brother Starbuck,” Palmer said through his teeth.

  April made a note, then lifted her face from the book. “And I, Sister Miss Temple, cast my vote for Sister Portia. Which means … the new president of Stone and Grave is Sister Portia.”

  A grin lit Ariana’s face as Tahira reached in for a hug. There was the briefest smattering of applause, but they were quickly cut off.

  “You have to be kidding me!” Palmer blurted, standing. “She’s a newbie! She just transferred here, for God’s sake!” he shouted, throwing an arm out in Ariana’s direction. “What the hell is wrong with you people?”