by Brei Betzold
“Scout?”
I looked up and found Thayne looking down at me, his lip was swollen, and I winced for him.
I pulled my ear buds out. “Yeah?”
He laughed, it was a nice sounding laugh. “I called your name like five times.”
“Sorry, didn’t hear you.”
“Yeah, kinda figured that out.”
“Did you need something?”
“No, not really, just wondering how you were feeling?” He asked a little taken aback by my abruptness.
“Doing fine.”
“How’s the head?”
“How’s the lip?”
“Touché,” he said looking at me oddly, “sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine, just didn’t sleep well.”
“Right, I can understand that.”
I was beginning to get nervous under his scrutiny, it was like he saw me, my demons, and I didn’t like that.
“Okay well,” I said lifting my ear buds up, “nice talking to you.”
“Scout, what the hell is wrong with you today?”
“Nothing, just tired.”
“Did I do something?”
“No, it’s me, okay, I’m broken, you don’t understand how broken.”
“Scout, we’re all broken, in some way, we’re all broken.”
“Not like me, you’re not broken like me,” I told him, hopped up and headed to the bathroom so I could breathe.
I went to the sink and ran cold water, leaned down and splashed some water on my face. I reached over to grab some paper towels when one was handed to me. I jerked my head up and saw Thayne standing there. I took the paper towel from him and wiped off my face keeping an eye on him.
“Want to tell me what’s going on?” he asked. “Yesterday we were friends and today I get the cold shoulder?”
I shrugged. “I’m not a good friend.”
“Mmm nope, that’s not it, so what’s going on?”
“Nothing,” I mumbled.
“So then what was with all that broken shit out there?”
“I am you know, broken?”
“How about you let me come up with my own conclusions?”
“Why, so I can get used to you, comfortable with you, just so you can tell me I’m not worth the time and energy?”
“Fuck, what the hell they have done to you?” he muttered, though it sounded like it was to himself.
“Told me the truth.”
He shook his head. “They did a real number on your head. What kind of dickwads have you dated in the past?”
I looked away and whispered, “Not many, they all came to the same conclusion though.”
“Well how about you let me make my own decisions regarding about how I spend my time, yeah?”
“Fine, whatever.”
“I never knew I could hate a word so much, until now. How about the next time I ask how you’re doing you tell me the truth instead of just saying fine, think you can do that?”
“Don’t know.”
“Well at least that’s honest,” he told me while rolling his eyes. “So Scout, how are you feeling today?”
It was my turn to roll my eyes. “My head hurts, I’m tired, and I don’t know what’s going on between us, and it’s confusing the fuck out of me.”
“I’m sorry about the head, take a nap in your stall later, and we’re friends, for now.”
I had to hide my smile about the nap comment; I hadn’t known anyone had noticed that.
I nodded, “Friends.”
He smiled at me, “For now, now let’s get out of here before I get into trouble for being in the women’s bathroom.”
We walked out of the bathroom and straight into Simon, Liam, and Kale walking into the shop—well, this should be fun.
“Scout,” Simon growled and walked away.
Liam and Kale both looked at me smirking, and I sighed. This is shaping up to be a fan-fucking-tastic day. Thayne reached down squeezed my hand then grinned at me, he knew I would be in for it and he found it funny—terrific. Then he walked off.
“So what was that middle of the night call about?” asked Kale. “Something about Cas?”
“Yeah, not quite sure but I think he may be on his way home?” I said ending it in a question looking at the two of them.
“Well guess we’ll find out soon enough, Harper Lee.”
I nodded, not wanting to think what I had missed in that conversation, about the possibility that he had been hurt, and they were transporting him to a hospital. I headed towards our stall for the guys to grab my arm and direct me to a different stall.
“Uhm, where are we going?”
“We were moved,” replied Kale. “Everything’s been moved over already.”
“Okay,” I said following them over to the stall beside Ace & Lace’s. “Oh this is lovely,” I said sarcastically.
We unlocked and opened the door and I went in search of my pillow and blanket, found a corner and curled up for a much needed nap, and I hoped that Cas would call me soon.
I was awoken by my phone ringing once again. I quickly pulled it out of my pocket, and hit the answer button.
“Ello,” I mumbled.
“Scout, it’s Cas.”
I was awake in an instant, “Cas.”
“I’m in Germany, waiting on transport.”
“Are you serious?” I asked. “Are you okay, you’re not hurt, are you?”
“No, I am fine, not hurt, just being sent home early.”
“Really?” I squealed.
“Yeah, hey I just wanted you to know, I gotta go, talk soon.” Then he was gone, and I squealed again.
“You okay over there neighbor?” I heard Thayne yell.
“I’m great,” I yelled back.
I heard him chuckle. “I like great,” he yelled back.
Chapter 15
We were sitting around waiting for them to call the winning and losing teams into to the little room they had designated as the judgment room. We had already sat through the judges going over our work, though we weren’t allowed in the room with them, since they were trying to keep it all unbiased. I looked over at a scowling Simon and rolled my eyes. Then I looked over at a scowling Thayne. I had no idea who had pissed in his post toasties since we had last talked.
Finally someone who worked with the show came out and called three teams out, and the rest of us had to wait. Some people talked, some were quiet, others looked nervous. I just wanted to get this over with. After about thirty minutes, the three teams came out looking dejected, one team went to their bay and started packing their stuff up, well I guess we knew who was going home.
Ten minutes later, the same guy came out and called in Ace & Laces team, Uncle Matt’s team, and ours. We all stood and made our way into the room. It was dimly lit with a long table sitting at one side where the five judges were sitting. Could they have been even more cliché with all this? It looked like every other reality show on television.
I stood with Simon on one side of me and Thayne on the other, both occasionally glowering at me. What the hell had I done to them? I knew Simon’s problem, he was pissed that we were now next to Ace & Lace as if I had any control over that. Thayne though, I had no idea about what his issue was.
We waited while they got everyone lined up then finally the show started. Eddie looked us all over then finally began, “Congratulations you three teams were the favorite with the judges.”
I waited, knowing there was more, Eddie looked over at Matt’s team, “Team Carson, we liked the old school look you went for, also the repair work is excellent. You couldn’t tell what was new and what you had made.”
Matt smiled and nodded his head and Eddie continued, “We were impressed and look forward to see what else you can do.”
Then he looked at our team. “Team Misfit Cabal, we were impressed with the skill of that paint job, and the unique colors you chose, well done. We were curious as to which one of you came up with the paint scheme as well as
who painted it?”
“I did,” I said quietly and four of the five nodded in appreciation, Ace glared at me.
“Well done, Scout, it was unique and we loved the black on black.”
I nodded and he turned towards Thayne’s team, “Team Ace & Lace, it was a very interesting combination of old school meets new school. The graphics you were able to paint on there I was a little worried about at the beginning, but it fit perfectly. We look forward to seeing what more you can do,” he finished.
“So now to the big moment, we chose Team Ace & Lace as the winner.”
Team Ace & Lace yelled and smacked each other on the back, then when everyone was calm we were released to go. I turned to head out of the room but heard my name. I looked back and found Micah standing there.
“Micah,” I said smiling up at him, “how are you?”
“Doing well, and you?”
“I’m fine,” I replied and heard a noise like a grunt and looked over to find Thayne standing near.
“Good, I’m glad to hear it,” he replied. “How’s Cas?”
“He’s doing good, coming home soon.”
Micah smiled. “Glad to hear it.”
“Yeah, me too, you going to be in town long?”
“Leaving tomorrow, why?”
“You should come over for dinner tonight,” I told him. “I’ll cook. We can talk and catch up.”
“Sounds like a plan,” he replied and I quickly gave him our address, and told him I would see him around six tonight, then headed out towards the door.
“Can I talk to you?” Thayne growled.
I was a little taken aback by how he as acting but I nodded and told him sure, we walked out and I led him to our bay, the pedal car was sitting on a table.
“So congrats,” I told him, he just grunted. “Wanna tell me what’s going on?”
“Why did you do it?”
“Uhm, do what?”
“You know what,” he growled.
“No I really don’t.” I said getting angry.
“Why did you have Tristan arrested?”
I flinched at the use of that name then took in what he said. “I didn’t get anyone arrested,” I said confused.
“Really? Because right before we were brought in there to sit around, I got a phone call stating he was arrested for breaking his restraining order.”
“Uhm…”
“Really, you won’t even admit you did it?”
“I didn’t do anything; I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“I’m done, and fuck you, Scout,” he yelled leaving me confused about what just happened.
I watched him walk away, running the conversation over in my head trying to figure out what the hell was going on. I hadn’t talked to any police. Of course, it had crossed my mind that he had written those words on the wall, but too many people knew what had happened to be sure. I hoped it hadn’t been him, I had hoped that he had gone home. I didn’t want to chance seeing him. I guess I had my answer on that though—he was still in town.
I rolled my head on my shoulders trying to break the tension in my shoulders and headed out to go to the grocery store so I could buy food for dinner tonight. I also planned to ask what the hell was going on, and what else they hadn’t told me.
***
I walked in the rental juggling the cheap plastic bags they used at the grocery store, praying that another one wouldn’t rip open. As it was, I had bags hanging on my arms and an armful of produce that had fallen on the ground when I picked up the bag. Why they felt the need to put as many items as possible into the cheapest bags they could buy, I would never understand. I was broken from my mental rant by the yelling in the other room, I quietly as possible kicked the door closed, and of course eavesdropped—I mean, who wouldn’t?
“You need to tell her,” I heard Cam yell.
“We can’t, you know that,” replied Simon attempting to not yell.
“No, I do not know that. I know that you won’t though.”
“No we can’t, she can’t handle it.”
“How the fuck would you know what she can and can’t handle? You don’t ever let her handle anything to find out,” she yelled then I heard a door slam.
I quickly went to the kitchen and started putting the groceries away, going over what I had heard. What were they hiding from me? I knew the argument was about me, they always are it seems, and after Thayne today, I had some ideas.
“How much did you hear?” asked Simon.
“Enough,” I replied curtly continuing to put everything away.
He sighed. “We don’t do it to hurt you, we’re just trying to protect you.”
“Is that why you didn’t tell me he was arrested today?”
“How did you hear about that?” he growled.
“Had an interesting conversation, was accused of things I had no idea about, wasn’t hard to put two and two together.”
He sighed again and ran his hands through his hair; he was annoyed. “He was picked up this morning to be asked about the vandalism.”
“Mmhmm,” I said knowing he was leaving things out, “and the violation on the restraining order?”
“God damn it,” he yelled, “who the fuck did you talk to?” Then he looked at me, “Thayne, it was Thayne, right?”
I nodded and went to start preparing for dinner.
“He had no right to tell you,” he continued to rant, “it wasn’t his place.”
“Seems to me he was the only one willing to tell me anything, even if he didn’t do it in the best of ways,” I mused.
He looked at me oddly then shook his head. “Where were you anyway?”
I looked around at the food, the cheap plastic bags then back at him, really was he that dense?
“Oh, right, sorry,” he replied sheepishly.
“Whatever, go fix things with your wife.” Then I went to work on dinner and ignoring him.
I knew they hid things from me, I wasn’t dumb, and I hadn’t really cared before. This time though I did care, and I was pissed about it. I was twenty-one years old, did I really want to spend the rest of my life with people hiding things from me, and making decisions about me? I didn’t know the answer to that since I had never really considered the question before, but now that I had, I wasn’t so sure I could live like that.
Micah showed up promptly at six p.m. I let him in and directed him towards the kitchen where I was still finishing dinner. I had decided to make chicken enchiladas in a cream sauce, spiced black beans, and Mexican rice. Micah carried in a six-pack of beer and sat them in the fridge, pulled two out and offered me one, but I shook him off.
“Come on Scout, you’re twenty-one now, right?”
“Yeah, but I don’t drink,” I said giving my standard answer.
“Why not? It’s just a beer.”
“Can’t,” I replied hoping he would drop it.
“Can’t?”
“Nope,” I said busying myself with dinner.
“Huh,” he said putting the second beer back in the fridge. I let out a relieved breath, no need for him to know I couldn’t drink because of all my medications.
I turned around to look at him and found him closer than I thought he was, he wasn’t quite invading my personal space, but just barely. I tried to step back but the counter blocked me. He stepped closer and ran a finger along one of my curls that had escaped my ponytail. I leaned back to get away from him but he only followed.
“I like the blue,” he murmured, “but I also liked the red.”
“It’s…it’s turquoise,” I stammered out I didn’t know what to do with him so close.
“It fits you,” he whispered leaning closer. I turned my head away.
“What’s the matter, Scout? Don’t you like me?”
“I…I like you fine,” I whimpered.
He leaned against me, putting more body weight on me pinning my legs to the cupboards below and I started hyperventilating, I didn’t like to be restrained.
>
“Scout,” he crooned and ran a finger down my cheek, I flinched, and then his weight was gone.
I gripped onto the counter holding myself up, trying to even out my breathing. I glanced up and found Thayne standing there looking extremely pissed off. He pulled his arm back and punched Micah, then tossed him out the kitchen door. I saw Cam move out of the way just before Micah was thrown out, she had a look of pure panic on her face.
Thayne held his hands out walking to me slowly. “Shhh Scout, it’s okay, he’s gone,” he murmured to me as he slowly walked toward me.
He was careful to not touch me, and I appreciated that, then I heard Micah yelling and the front door slam shut. Simon, Kale, and Liam rushed into the kitchen and it was too many people, and I felt my chest tighten.
“Hey guys, give her some space,” Thayne said, but kept his eyes on me.
The guys didn’t listen though and tried to push in closer to me, Thayne looked around saw the back door and nudged his head in that direction. I quickly headed that way hoping my knees wouldn’t give out. I opened the door and rushed outside sucking in lung full of air, hoping to calm myself.
Thayne sat down lit up a cigarette and let me calm down, never saying a word, never asking any questions, and I appreciated it but I knew he would ask soon.
I finally got my breathing under control, though my hands were still shaking, I looked out over our small back yard and finally admitted to him, “I have PTSD, an anxiety disorder, trust issues, and a whole slew of other fucked up issues.”
Chapter 16
He continued sitting there, smoking his cigarette as though I hadn’t told him that I was damaged, didn’t he get it?
“Did you hear me?”
“Yeah, I heard,” he stated calmly. “What you expect me to run away now?”
I snorted, “Yeah actually.”
“Is that what all the others did?”
