Mine : You Can't Help Who You Fall In Love With... (The Winterburg Series Book 1)

by Linzvonc

  Luke.

  Even thinking his name made my skin crawl. I couldn’t help but pity him, I had hoped he would have changed a little in the time I’d been gone. But he was still a creep, playing football and hanging out at The Lounge. He lacked ambition but had buckets full of sleaze—what a combination.

  I stole a glance at Cal and my heart physically ached with the love I felt for him.

  The difference between Cal and Luke was astounding—but then again, the difference between Cal and any man was. I didn’t need to travel the world to know there would be no one like him, no one who could look at me the way he did, make me feel like I was the only woman in the world like he did.

  I couldn’t imagine my life without him, and that terrified me.

  His eyelids fluttered as the pilot announced our descent into New York and I was greeted by those captivating green eyes.

  “Did I really fall to sleep on a plane?” He mumbled in disbelief as I littered his face with soft kisses.

  “You did. You slept like a baby.”

  He yawned as he stretched, the cabin stewardess pausing by our seats to remind us to wear our seatbelts. I was used to the effect he had on women, the way their eyes widened at his breathtaking good looks, the way they would struggle to compose themselves when he shot them that panty-dropping smile. But this one was greedy, her professionalism slipping as she gazed at him openly, her eyes locked onto his body until he finished stretching.

  “Sir, your seatbelt.”

  He nodded as he waved her away with disinterest.

  “Yeah, lady, I know. But if this plane comes crashing down do you really think this sliver of fabric will keep me alive?”

  I bit back a smile as a flash of annoyance crept into her doll-like face. “I’m just doing my job, Sir.”

  He nodded without speaking, turning to me. “How are you feeling?” he murmured against my hair as he kissed my head softly.

  “Tired?” I offered with exasperation as he grimaced.

  “Go and see a doctor. It’s not normal to feel this tired for weeks. Tell him you’re losing interest in your boyfriend, too,” he teased as I turned to look at him, kissing his mouth before he could say anything more.

  “Shut up, Mr. Fallon.”

  He grinned as the plane began to pick up speed, his hands now gripping the side of the seat so hard his knuckles turned white. I laced my fingers over his as the pilot executed a near-perfect landing, and I turned to see the relief in Cal's eyes.

  “Thank fuck that’s over.”

  “I’ve missed our bed so much,” I groaned as he sent me a wicked look.

  “The three of us will reunite shortly.”

  “Do you ever think about anything else?” I laughed as we left the plane, the wind whipping my hair around my face.

  “I think about you in every capacity. All of the time,” he said seriously as we entered the terminal building. I felt a shiver of delight at his words as we made it through customs unscathed. I was a U.S. citizen, on an internal flight, yet still felt like a criminal under the suspicious gaze of the border officers.

  As we waited for our luggage, I felt a wave of nausea overtake me as I searched for the toilets with desperation.

  “I need the toilet,” I managed to get out before racing to the nearest restroom, which happened to be an accessible one. I didn’t have time to consider that as I reached the toilet bowl, emptying my stomach contents into it. I gasped as I retched, aware that something was wrong with me. I wiped my mouth as I stood, listing my symptoms in my head. I washed my face in the sink noticing how pale I looked.

  Tiredness...

  Irritated all the time....

  I must be due on my period soon. But that had never made me sick before.

  Sickness....

  I stared at my reflection as it hit me.

  Where was my period?

  I closed my eyes and jumped when someone tried the handle of the door, opening to reveal Cal.

  “Are you alright? You’ve been in here a while—”

  “I think I’m pregnant,” I whispered as his eyes met mine slowly.

  “What?” his voice was low as he dropped the bags he was holding onto the floor beside him.

  I didn’t speak, but to my horror I began to cry.

  “Hey, Raven, don’t cry,” he strode over to me, taking me in his arms.

  “I can’t remember when I had my last period and—”

  “Sssh. It’s okay. Let’s just get out of the airport, then we can talk okay? We’ve got this baby, don’t worry,” he said soothingly as he kissed me softly.

  I nodded as I sniffed, watching as he gathered our belongings onto a nearby cart. He slid his arm around me protectively as he guided me out of the airport and towards a waiting cab, barking an address at the driver who scurried to the driver’s seat as Cal put our luggage into the trunk.

  I laid against him as we drove, aware that we were nearing home. Cal paid the driver as he handed me the keys to our home, watching me carefully.

  “Don’t carry anything,” he ordered as I leaned down to drag my suitcase.

  “Cal,” I sighed as he looked at me sternly, and I knew better than to argue.

  I walked in, the familiar smell of our house greeting me as I made a beeline for the kitchen, grabbing the wall calendar. I searched with my finger until I saw the little red dot that showed my period's due date.

  Cal stood in the doorway, watching me intently.

  “I’ve missed my period,” I whispered as my eyes widened, realizing it was more than that.

  Being away distracted me, how did I not remember?!

  “Fuck. I’ve missed two.”

  Part Two: Chapter Twenty-Six

  GRETCHEN

  “You need to keep calm, my love.”

  He rubbed my knee reassuringly as my leg jigged with nerves, my eyes glued to the black screen above the reception, waiting for my name to scroll along in red pixels.

  I was sweating and chewing on my lip, yet Cal was an oasis of calm. He was flicking through a home magazine, turning it this way and that to assess the photographs with interest.

  I felt bile rise in my throat and I sipped my water, praying that I was seen soon.

  Suddenly there was a soft ping, and there was my name, Miss Gretchen Red swirling on the screen as I felt dizzy with fear.

  “Do you want me to come in with you?” he asked, and I shook my head.

  “I’ll be fine.”

  “I’m right here,” he said, kissing my hand as I nodded numbly, walking down the pale corridor to the room shown on the screen.

  I knocked softly out of courtesy and heard a firm voice call me in.

  I pushed open the door and smiled, whilst my legs felt like jelly. The doctor was in her fifties, soft grey hair curled under her chin as she glanced at me with kind eyes.

  “Hi, Gretchen. What can I do for you today?”

  I swallowed and held out my first urine of the day bottle, my hands shaking.

  “I have missed two periods. I think I may be pregnant,” I whispered as she nodded, turning back to the screen.

  “Okay, what was the date of your last period?”

  I answered her questions robotically as she took the sample, dipping a thin stick into it then placing it on top whilst she stood watching it, her hands on her hips.

  I stared at the floor, feeling about ten years old suddenly, sitting in the headteacher's office about to be given a dressing down.

  “You are indeed pregnant.”

  I closed my eyes as I heard her shuffling over to the desk, tapping into her computer as she glanced at me.

  “Is this good news for you?” she smiled kindly as I looked at her in shock.

  “I’m not entirely sure how I feel.”

  She held her hand up as she turned a calendar in her hands then looked up at me.

  “That’s an entirely normal reaction. From my calculations, you are approximately eight weeks pregnant. A scan will confirm that though, bu
t we don’t offer them until twelve weeks. Are you in a relationship?”

  “I am, yes. He’s in the waiting room.”

  She nodded as she handed me some leaflets, her eyes crinkling as she smiled.

  “Okay, well, you will receive an appointment from the obstetrician when you reach twelve weeks. If you need any further information from us just call. Is there anything you want to ask now?”

  I shook my head as she smiled.

  “Okay, then, congratulations.”

  I turned and walked out of the door, my heart in my throat as I walked back down the corridor.

  I was pregnant? I was going to be a mommy?

  Cal has his hands laced behind his head, jumping up when he saw me.

  “Are you okay” he asked gruffly, and I nodded, pulling him to the exit. When we got outside, I began to cry, and his eyes filled with worry.

  “Baby, whatever the doctor said, we can get through it. I swear. Come here.”

  He held me in his arms, and I cried before pulling away from him, looking up into his eyes, my heart thumping in my throat.

  “You’re going to be a daddy, Cal.”

  He blinked, a broad smile spreading over his face. “No fucking way.”

  I nodded as his eyes searched mine anxiously.

  “Are you happy? Whatever you want—” he began his supportive spiel, which I interrupted suddenly, kissing his mouth.

  “I want it. I’m in shock, but Cal, a mini us.”

  Suddenly I felt the floor disappear from beneath my feet as he lifted me into the air, swirling me around.

  “Oh baby, I’m so fucking happy right now, you’ve got no idea.”

  I bit my lip as our lips met, a new feeling enveloping me as I saw his eyes gazing at me like they did the first time he saw me.

  “I couldn’t wish for anyone better than you to be a mother to my child.”

  I felt tears fill my eyes again as he pulled me close, kissing my head as his arms circled me protectively.

  “The baby is due in seven months, Cal! What am I going to do about school?” I chewed on my fingernail as he sighed, guiding me towards his car.

  “We’ll speak with the college, see what your options are. What are you thinking of doing?”

  I couldn’t think, my head was too busy with images of our unborn child.

  Would they have my eyes or Cal’s?

  “Oh God, our parents,” I groaned as he smiled, almost as though he had already thought it through.

  “I need to be honest. I have booked to take you away, to Paris. I’m not entirely sure that it’s the best idea, considering how ill you have been. I’d rather not take you on a flight over the Atlantic to a foreign country,” he grimaced as he thought about it, his eyes filled with anxiety.

  My heart swelled with love for him, and I reached for his hand.

  “You’re so romantic! Paris?! For my birthday?”

  His lips kissed my hand softly, his green eyes piercing into mine and making my skin heat up instantly.

  “You’ll have many more birthdays. I’ll take you and our baby around the world if that’s what you want,” his hands fell to my stomach, caressing it softly.

  I didn’t think I could have felt more love for him than I did right then, and I threw my arms around him.

  “Shall we get you home?”

  He opened the car door and gazed at me as I climbed in gingerly, suddenly aware I was carrying a tiny human in my womb. He shut the door carefully before making his way to the driver’s side, climbing in beside me and grinning inanely at me.

  “I’m so fucking happy, Raven. I want to go and buy a whole new nursery for the little bean.”

  “Bean?” I laughed as he drove, his hand on my thigh lovingly.

  “Yeah, it’s like, the size of a kidney bean. I looked it up last night whilst you were sleeping,” he looked over at me and blushed as I laughed.

  “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, you said you had missed two periods, so I guessed you were about two months pregnant. Either that or a whole host of other terrifying things that could be wrong with you,” his jaw clenched as I watched him drive, his thumb now running circles on my thigh.

  “Is our house big enough for a baby? Is it in the right area?”

  I suddenly panicked at the thought of being a mother in New York. I had visions of me hauling a screaming baby onto the subway whilst sweating buckets, everyone sneering at how bad a mother I was.

  A smile played at his lips as he glanced at me, before focusing back on the road.

  “Listen to me, Gretchen. You and this baby will want for nothing. Anything you want, or need, you’ve got it. Just tell me.”

  “What if it means no more mafia stuff?” I blurted out, biting my lip as his eyes hardened, his posture deflating as he let out a sigh.

  He pushed his hair back in irritation before answering me.

  “Whatever is right for us. As a family.”

  Relief coursed through me as we sat in traffic, my eyes darting around the streets surrounding us looking for babies and mothers. Cal would be as good as his word, that I knew. I just also knew that there was a side to him that I was either going to have to accept that I didn’t know it, or decide if he needed to change it.

  If that was even possible.

  Part Two: Chapter Twenty- Seven

  CAL

  I’m going to be a daddy.

  I had always known I’d want a family at some point, but I didn’t expect it to be so soon. I couldn’t be happier though, the most incredible woman in the world was going to have my child.

  I watched her sleep, her full lips parted slightly as she breathed, her chest rising and falling with a steady rhythm. She was so pale though, and it was killing me seeing her suffer through something that was supposed to be natural. She didn’t want anyone to know until the scan proved that everything was okay, which meant she didn’t have any other women to talk to.

  I wanted her to tell her mother at least, but she was stubborn. My eyes trailed down her chest to her exposed stomach, my chest aching with love and adoration for what was growing in there. I stood and quietly walked to the window, staring out at the city.

  I don’t want our child growing up here.

  I didn’t want our child to be a target from all of those that had issues with me—and there were many.

  The only reason I was here was because of Gretchen and her studies, but she could study somewhere else if she wanted to. I glanced back over at her, the moonlight from the window falling on her in the darkness, illuminating her like an angel.

  Too much had happened to her already.

  If it was up to me, she would be on bed rest for the rest of her pregnancy. She’d addressed my line of work a few weeks ago and at the time I was filled with shame. This woman deserved an honest man, who worked his fingers to the bone to put food on the table, not someone who pulled the trigger on a gun when someone needed to pay a debt.

  It was this city. When I was here, this is what I did. She deserved better.

  “Cal?”

  Her soft voice broke into my tormented thoughts, as I turned to see her rubbing her eyes sleepily.

  “Go back to sleep baby, it’s early,” I made my way over to the bed as she yawned, looking at me with those beautiful eyes.

  She still gave me those damn butterflies in my stomach, and that’s how I had known she was The One. Many girls were beautiful, and kind. Most are great in bed too, and eager to please.

  But Gretchen was different. She made me want to be a better man.

  “I’m hungry,” she pouted, and I laughed.

  “At three am?” I couldn’t hide the disbelief in my voice as she nodded enthusiastically.

  “Yup. Bean must be hungry.”

  I leaned over her, my lips brushing against the soft skin of her tummy as I addressed said Bean.

  “What would Bean like? Waking mommy up for food and all.”

  “Bacon,” she declared, her hands on my hair as I loo
ked at her in surprise.

  “Bacon at three a.m. Okay, Bean, I’m going to cook some bacon. Anything mommy wants, mommy gets,” I pushed up onto my forearms as she held her hands out, pulling me into an embrace.

  “Thank you.”

  I kissed her tenderly as her tummy rumbled.

  Our eyes met and I did a mock salute before climbing off the bed, pulling my thin hoodie over my head as she watched me hungrily.

  “Then can I have you for dessert?” She bit her lip as I winked at her.

  “As I said, anything you want.”

  Part Two: Chapter Twenty-Eight

  GRETCHEN

  The craving for coffee was ridiculous.

  I pushed open the doors of Starbucks, my nostrils inhaling the intoxicating scent.

  Cal wouldn’t approve, but I’d done my research.

  I can have a small coffee.

  I almost ran to the barista who blinked at me in surprise as my order tumbled from my mouth hungrily. I spied the lemon muffin and demanded one of those, too. I paid and went to sit at a table by the window, feeling giddy that I was finally going to get my caffeine fix. The nausea was starting to fade now, but cravings were kicking in big time.

  My phone vibrated on the table and I saw Cal's name with a message asking where I was. I considered lying for a moment as I wondered where I could say I was. The barista called my name and I stood eagerly, only to see someone standing in my way.

  Someone heavenly. Who smelled amazing.

  “You didn’t reply to my text,” he said softly as he turned to get the coffee and muffin from the gazing barista.

  “Cal,” I squeaked as he examined my cup.

  “Decaf?”

  I shifted on my feet as I snatched it from him, holding it to my chest protectively.

  “It’s small,” I snapped defensively, as he chuckled softly.

  “But strong. Like you,” he guided me back to my table, sitting in front of me as he watched me carefully.

  “I’m not a Faberge egg.”

  “You’re pregnant with my child, in New York City. Yes, you are.”