2. Come Be My Love
Page 8
"Damn it!" He paused, then consciously lowered his voice. "You can be very irritating. Has anyone ever pointed that out to you before?"
She smiled. "Oh, yes."
"Good. Then it probably doesn't come as a complete shock to you that I've mentioned it."
"No. That's just one of the reasons I'd never consider getting married. You see," she explained in a confidential tone, "I don't want to ever have to worry that my being irritating is going to create a problem in someone's life. Now they can get away from me until they get over it."
"This may come as a real blow to your theory, my love, but finding you irritating does not make me want to marry you any less."
"It doesn't?"
"Oh."
"You see, you have all sorts of personality quirks that I find endearing—lovable, actually. Irritating I can live with."
"You just don't understand, Greg. It isn't as though I don't like you. I do. Very much. And I'm very attracted to you."
"Well, thank God for small blessings."
"But that isn't enough on which to base a good marriage."
"It's a damn good start."
"What I mean is, I'm not marriageable material."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Some women grow up knowing that they will eventually become wives. I've always known I wouldn't. Therefore, I've never made any effort to find out what it would take to be a good wife. Take my word for it, Greg. You're going to look back on this night as one of the narrowest escapes you ever had." She stretched out on the bed once more and sighed. "I hadn't realized how tense I was. Thanks for talking to me. It's really helped me to relax." She plumped her pillow and turned over. "Good night, Greg."
He stared at her, dumbfounded. She was through talking. She had found their discussion relaxing, for God's sake. She had turned down his proposal of marriage as though he'd offered a second helping of dessert, and she'd refused in the same manner as she would have dessert, explaining it wasn't good for her.
What kind of woman was she, anyway?
Greg lowered himself to the bed and stared at her back. Was she right? Had he just had a narrow escape? After all, what sort of life would he have with a woman like that? Didn't she understand what he was offering her—a stable home life, a devoted husband, a wealthy, devoted husband... a boring, workaholic husband?
She knew. A couple of days in his company had shown her what a narrow existence he led. He didn't really blame her. He'd made no effort these past few years to do more than work.
Greg lay there for hours and faced the kind of person he had become. He didn't like what he saw. He didn't like it at all.
When had he become so set in his ways? So inflexible? So pompous? Why had he thought that a proposal of marriage from him would be immediately and gratefully accepted? He didn't have the foggiest idea how to be a part of a relationship. Perhaps that was why he spent so much of his time working. He was comfortable practicing law. He knew what to do and he was good at what he did. There was a sense of accomplishment and purpose, tangible evidence that he was a success at something.
He didn't know how to relate to another person.
When he'd met Penny he'd been drawn to her warmth and her even disposition. He had visualized them establishing a companionable marriage—with no unexpected scenes or surprises. When her childhood sweetheart had turned up just before their wedding, Greg had been given the opportunity to see a whole new side of Penny, one that he hadn't known existed.
Rather than deal with his discovery, he had walked away from the situation.
Walking away from emotional situations had always been his way of handling them. Now he didn't want to walk away. He wanted to explore these new emotions, to come to terms with them, to incorporate them into his world.
Greg felt as though his life had gone from black-and-white photography to living color. The color was dazzling, almost blinding in its intensity. He needed help in coming to terms with the full spectrum before him.
He felt as though meeting Brandi had snapped him out of that colorless, emotionless world. Even his irritation had been surprising. As a rule, he was adept at not letting his feelings surface. He'd always had the ability to present his case effectively.
Now he'd tried to win the most important victory of his life, and he'd blown it completely.
He forced himself to relax, closing his eyes. All right, so he'd blown it. He'd asked and she'd turned him down. She hadn't really believed he was serious—and if he was, she wasn't interested.
He couldn't blame her. He didn't have much to offer in the way of companionship... love... excitement. But he intended to learn as quickly as possible. He certainly wasn't going to give up. Now that his goal was within sight, Greg knew that he was going to do whatever it took to win Brandi Martin.
As he was dozing off to sleep he felt her curl up to the warmth of his back, her arm curving around his waist. He smiled to himself. Awake, Brandi might not think they had a future together, but asleep she was already making it clear that she was comfortable having him nearby.
❧
When Brandi opened her eyes the next morning she was dazzled by the brilliant light coming from outside. She raised up on her elbow and gazed out the bedroom window. New snow lay everywhere in drifts,, the sunlight catching glints of sparkle in the pristine white mounds.
The storm was over.
She could see small animal tracks crisscrossing the hillside, and she smiled. It would be a perfect day to go out and explore.
Then she remembered.
The two police officers had spent the night. Greg had once again shared her bed. He had proposed to her. She sank back under the covers and pulled them up to her ears. Perhaps she wasn't as ready to face the new day as she'd first thought.
Brandi listened for voices from downstairs, but she could hear nothing. She could only smell the tantalizing aroma of fresh coffee, which was enough to give her courage to crawl out of bed.
She felt rested, which surprised her. For some reason she seemed to sleep better when Greg was there in bed with her than when she slept alone. She couldn't understand it. She certainly wasn't used to sleeping with anyone else. How was it possible that she could sleep so deeply, without dreaming, and not be disturbed by his presence?
Brandi shrugged and crawled out of bed. She found the heavy velour robe she'd purchased during their last trip to town, slid her bare feet into her warm fleece-lined house slippers and made her way downstairs.
She paused at the bottom of the stairs. There was no sign of their previous night's guests. The room looked neat and clean, and there was a fire dancing merrily in the fireplace. The coffee was warming in an empty kitchen. She poured herself a cup and sat down at the table.
Glancing out the window, she could see that Greg had been busy since he'd gotten up. The porch and stairs had been shoveled clean and a path had been dug to the car. Squinting slightly against the glare, Brandi spotted Greg clearing the drive to the cabin.
On sudden impulse, she decided to join him. She finished her coffee quickly, then, after dressing into her ski clothes, let herself outside.
What a glorious day. It was crisp and clear, with no sign of wind. She didn't feel the cold through her warm clothing. Brandi wanted to laugh out loud with the sheer joy of being alive and able to experience this latest miracle of nature.
Greg glanced up, and she waved. He waved back and began to walk toward her. His proposal from the night before popped into her head, and all at once she wondered how she was supposed to treat him now. She'd never had anyone propose to her before, and she wasn't certain of the proper etiquette in such a situation.
She hadn't wanted to hurt him. In some unconscious way she knew that she was actually protecting herself by refusing to even consider the idea. What she had said the night before was true. She'd never considered the possibility that someday she might meet someone who would change her mind about marriage.
It wasn't the institution of marriage s
he was avoiding as much as it was the long-term intimacy that marriage suggested. Greg had implied that she had been willing to make love to him, and he'd been correct, even though she still couldn't explain her reaction to him.
Brandi had never been tempted to make love with anyone before. She'd never allowed anyone the opportunity to get through her defenses. Somehow Greg had. No doubt the frightening situation she'd run from had already shaken her so that she hadn't been able to rebuild her defenses by the time she'd awakened and discovered him in bed with her.
Whatever the cause, she had allowed Greg more liberties than she'd ever allowed another man—and she'd thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it.
But that didn't mean that she could be a wife to him, or that she had the foggiest understanding of what he might expect from her as a wife.
"Good morning."
Brandi realized that the man had an unfair advantage. The combination of his flashing smile, dancing eyes and seductively low voice played havoc with all her good intentions to spare him a future with her.
"Hi."
Brandi couldn't think of anything else to say. She just stood there and looked up at him, enjoying the sight of him along with the rest of nature's miracles.
"Did you sleep well?"
She nodded. "What happened to the police officers?"
He glanced back to the road, which curved out of sight around the hillside. "They heard the snowplow out early this morning and went to catch up with it. They've had time to get their car unstuck and back to town by now." He dropped his arm companionably around her shoulders, the snow shovel in his other hand, and started walking back up to the cabin. "I don't know about you, but I'm starving."
Greg didn't want to tell her that when he'd awakened that morning, just past dawn, he'd had the worst struggle of his life not to make love to her. She had felt so natural there in his arms, and he'd wanted her so badly that he still ached with it. But making love wasn't going to settle the questions between them.
He'd gotten up and made coffee for himself and Pete and Jim, seen them off and decided to start clearing the driveway. Greg could only hope Tim would make it back that day. His sense of honor and his willpower had never before been so tested.
Greg had spent the intervening hours looking at himself, his life and his goals. He had realized that if he didn't like what he saw, he could change it. He was in control of his life. He accepted full responsibility for the restricted, shallow existence he'd chosen up until the time he had met Brandi.
With firm resolve, he was determined to change... not because of her but because of what he wanted out of life. He wanted a full, substantial, loving relationship. He wanted a family. He wanted sons and daughters with curly black hair and big blue eyes in elfin faces. He wanted to be there for them, to watch them grow, to listen to their stories, to share in their triumphs and their disappointments.
No longer was he willing to settle for the tepid companionship that he had thought he wanted with Penny. With Brandi he knew that he could have a Technicolor spectacular of a marriage—filled with fireworks, crashing cymbals and rooms filled with love and laughter.
All he had to do was to convince her of that.
A piece of cake.
Chapter 7
Breakfast became a hilarious affair. Brandi wasn't sure what had caused the difference, but Greg seemed to be lighthearted, teasing her unmercifully with outrageous suggestions for breakfast.
She ended up preparing huevos rancheros, a Mexican dish of scrambled eggs and chopped beef wrapped in a flour tortilla and covered with a hot sauce. Brandi was determined to show him that despite his ridiculous suggestions she could turn out a breakfast that was neither dull nor boring.
"My God, my tongue is on fire," he said after a few bites. He grabbed his glass of orange juice.
"I told you not to be so liberal with the hot sauce," she pointed out calmly, continuing to eat.
"You also said it wasn't all that hot."
"I told you the bottle was labeled Medium Spicy. But if you aren't used to it, the sauce can seem rather hot."
"You can say that again." He tentatively took another bite. "Great flavor, though."
"But not what you'd expect a lawyer to have for breakfast on a daily basis."
He grinned, wiping his mouth with a napkin. "Oh, I don't know. I have a hunch it might give me an unusual amount of energy to meet the demands of a busy schedule.''
Brandi unobtrusively tried to study him at odd moments, wondering why he seemed so different today. He was dressed in a heavy sweater and winter pants, his usual attire since she'd known him. The morning exercise had given him a ruddy color that was in attractive contrast to his light hair.
The change seemed to be from within. It was as though he glowed with an inner light. He seemed more relaxed, somehow. There were no distractions today. He was totally and completely focused on her. She found the attention a little unnerving. It was almost as though he were a missile locked in on a target. Brandi had an uneasy suspicion that she was the target.
She hadn't brought up his proposal of the night before. Neither had he. Brandi supposed she was relieved that he wasn't going to try to debate the issue with her. She reminded herself once again that he would be a formidable foe. She had no desire to cross swords with him.
If you lost this battle, you'd probably find yourself married to him, she reminded herself. A shiver ran down her backbone at the thought.
"Are you cold?" he asked, getting up and pouring them some more coffee.
"No."
"Good. I was hoping I could talk you into going skiing after we give our breakfast a chance to settle."
She grinned. "I'd love it. I just wish I'd brought my camera. Today looks like a winter wonderland."
Greg sat down across from her again and picked up his cup. "I can't help wondering if we'll hear from Tim today."
"He said he'd get back to us as soon as he learned anything."
"I know you'll be glad to have this nightmare behind you."
She nodded.
"I've been thinking. Why don't you come back to Payton with me? No one would question your presence there. You'd be safe while you wait until this mess is resolved."
She was quiet for a few minutes, thinking over his suggestion. He'd been casual enough in his offer, in much the same way she imagined he'd have made such an offer to Tim.
Now that she knew she had been traced to this area, Brandi knew she couldn't stay there.
But would she feel any safer with Greg at his home? He had an unusual effect on her. All her lifelong convictions seemed to waver and wilt whenever he was around.
"I might consider it, on one condition," she finally said.
"Name it."
"There will be no discussion of marriage between us."
"Whatever you say," he replied immediately.
"Because you know how I feel about the idea."
"Not really. All I know is that you don't consider me ideal marriage material."
"I never said that!"
"That's the impression I got."
"Well, I never even implied that. I'm sure you'll make someone a fine husband, if that's what you really want. I'm just saying that you don't know me well enough to want to marry me."
His grin widened. "Then I find it very accommodating of you, Ms. Martin, to allow me the opportunity to get to know you better."
"Wait a minute. That's not what I meant." Why was she having so much trouble explaining something so simple? "I don't mind getting better acquainted with you. I would like to be your friend, Greg. I just don't want more than that.''
"I see."
"Somehow I doubt it."
"What you're saying is that you will come and stay with me for a few days until Tim lets us know you can go home safely only if I treat you as a friend and not as a potential mate."
"That's it. You've got it."
"I can live with that."
"Good."
"Can you?"
/> "What do you mean by that?"
"I suppose that only time will tell. Why don't we get some skiing in while we're waiting to hear from Tim? Who knows? He may be able to get to the bottom of it immediately and we can go our separate ways, content to mail Christmas cards to each other annually."
She looked at him through narrowed eyes. "Are you making fun of me?"
"Of course not! Why do you ask?"
"Because you're smiling."
He immediately stopped smiling. Looking at her sternly, he asked, "Is that better?"
"Your eyes are smiling."
He grinned. "You're adorable. Has anyone ever told you that?"
She shook her head. "Mostly I'm told that I'm irritating, stubborn, opinionated, too independent and a pain in the posterior."
He stood and pulled her up with him. "Then I've got a great deal to look forward to, haven't I? Just think, by the time I see all those sides of your personality I'll be eternally grateful that you refused to marry me.
As she pulled on her outdoor clothes once again, Brandi couldn't help but realize that she rather resented his cheerful assessment of their present relationship.
❧
Hours later they returned to the cabin, happily exhausted, and saw Tim's car. Brandi breathlessly shed her skis and stumbled up the stairs and across the deck to the door.
"Tim?'' she called, throwing open the door. "What did you find out?" She bent over and started unlacing her boots.
She heard a noise from the couch, and Tim's frowning face appeared over the back of it. "I found out that I might as well forget about catching up on my sleep if you're anywhere in the vicinity," he grumbled, running his hand through his hair.
Brandi stepped out of her boots and padded over to where he sat stretching.
''Well? What did you find out?" she demanded.
Tim glanced around. " Where's Greg?"
"Oh, he's coming. We were out skiing. Isn't it a gorgeous day?"
He narrowed his eyes when he looked toward the bright expanse of snow and sky. ''Yeah. Gorgeous."