Blog of the Dead - Life

by Lisa Richardson

  ‘We spent getting on for a year moving on from place to place, slowly heading our way down to the coast, hoping it’d be better down here with the sea on one side – some sort of natural defence. We’d just arrived in Folkestone and were checking the stores in town for supplies and not coming up with very much when we met Marco. He said we could stay with him until we got somewhere for ourselves.

  ‘I didn’t trust him. He was dressed in a clean suit and a shirt with a tie, which I thought was odd in the middle of the bloody zombie apocalypse, and he was all full of … enthusiasm. I hadn’t seen an enthusiastic person since before the outbreak. I mean, what’s there to be fucking excited about? And his smile didn’t seem genuine to me, sort of like a salesman who hasn’t made his target yet that month and faced the boot if he didn’t convince some poor sod to buy something they didn’t need.’

  ‘So you did a runner …?’

  ‘No. We went with him. We were hungry and cold, and it was getting dark. With no food and nowhere to stay we were desperate.’ Sean shrugged his shoulders before carrying on. ‘He took us to a flat overlooking the sea, not far from here. He told us he’d saved a group of survivors in the town and he’d like to save us too. I asked him what he meant and he said he looked forward to me and Anna visiting the centre where he’d talk with us in “great depth” about it. I told him I get bored easily and to give me the short version. But he kept this stupid smarmy grin on his face like it hurt him and told me there is no short route to salvation.’

  ‘What does that mean?’ I asked.

  ‘I don’t know, I never found out. When he offered us food and water I almost told him to stuff it. I knew there was something off about the bloke, but we were both starving. I intended for us to eat and run. The bloke kept on talking and Anna was riveted to him but I couldn’t concentrate on a word of it; I felt groggy and I think he must have slipped something into my food or drink because the next thing I knew, I woke up on the sofa. Morning sun poured through the window, and I had a pounding headache, like I’d been on a three day bender.

  ‘Anna was sat next to me, listening to Marco talking. For all I knew they’d been like that all night. When I asked her what was going on, she was all withdrawn and cagey and I put it down to lack of sleep, but Marco was as overly enthusiastic as the day before. I knew something wasn’t right and I didn’t want to waste any words on it, so I punched the smarmy git and dragged Anna out of there.

  ‘We found that house in town, but Anna was distant, even worse than after losing Dad and Jaden. She wouldn’t eat or talk to me and stayed in her room, even using it as a fucking toilet. Then one morning, a few days after we met Marco, I woke up and she’d gone. I guessed she’d gone back to Marco’s flat but when I went round there, the place was deserted. I searched the streets, hoping that even if I couldn’t find her, I might run into that smarmy git and I could beat her whereabouts out of him.’

  ‘Let me guess, you found her the day she killed Lucy?’ I said.

  ‘Yeah. It’d been almost a month since she’d scarpered. I didn’t recognise her at first, the way she’d mutilated herself. She attacked that girl – Lucy – ripped her throat out with her teeth. I tried to stop her but Anna turned and attacked me and then she bolted. I went after her and that’s when you and Misfit found me on the beach.’

  ‘Some bloke brainwashed your sister into becoming a killer … bit far fetched isn’t it?’ said Shane. ‘How’s that work?’

  ‘I don’t know – I slept through the induction meeting, remember?’ Sean said between gritted teeth.

  ‘Not that far fetched,’ said Chris. ‘I studied history at university and covered a bit on the Korean War. I know brainwashing techniques were supposedly used by Korean and Chinese captors on American prisoners of war to get them to make anti-American statements or convert them to Communism. But researchers think most of the POWs didn’t actually take on the new beliefs, only faking it to avoid extreme torture. And those that were converted went back to their old beliefs once they’d been released.’

  ‘So it doesn’t really work?’ I said.

  ‘No, I’m not saying it doesn’t work. I guess while you’re under the influence of the brainwasher it works. I’m not a psychologist, but look at all those cults where some crazy person convinces a ton of people to believe they all need to kill themselves so they can ride on a spaceship to the New World or something. As far as I know cults work in the same way that the American POWs were coerced, by an individual’s identity being broken down over time to the extent they don’t know who they are any more before being programmed with a new set of beliefs and behaviours.’

  ‘How exactly do you break someone’s identity down?’ I asked shivering as the knowledge sunk in that Marco had tried to recruit me and my team.

  ‘Like I said, I’m not a psychologist but if you tell someone enough times that they’re bad, they’ll start to believe that they’re bad,’ said Chris. ‘Torture, sleep deprivation, sensory deprivation, malnutrition, isolation, psychological abuse … they’re all techniques used to do it. Then, when the individual is at breaking point, the abuser offers salvation as long as the abused does what they say.’

  ‘This is just, like, mental – So Marco brainwashed the HZs to be the way they are … but why?’ said Tracey, her long blonde ponytail bouncing between her delicate shoulders as she spoke.

  ‘Power. Control.’

  ‘I believed I could save her, if only I could get her away from Marco.’

  ‘And that’s why you ran off this morning … you left me and Kay in a houseful of zombies so you could track her down and disappear and leave us in the shit?’ I said.

  ‘What? No, that’s not what happened. She broke into the house. I woke up on the sofa and she was standing over me with a knife in her hand. I think she’d been sent to kill me, but … she couldn’t do it. She ran off and I went after her. I struggled to keep up because of my bad leg. I saw that kid, Josh tackle her but I couldn’t get there in time. She slit his throat. There was nothing I could do. I chased her to the hotel, busted in and that’s when I met the rest of Marco’s Saved. I managed to get out of there but they chased me to the park. That’s when I ran into you, Sophie.’

  ‘So there are more of them?’ said Chris.

  ‘Yeah. Lots more.’

  ‘And what happened to your sister … how’d she die?’ asked Chris.

  ‘Marco killed her in front of me.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘Me too. And that’s why I’m sticking around,’ Sean said looking at me. ‘One of the reasons.’

  ‘And what’s the other?’ I asked.

  ‘Kay’s stable now.’ I turned at the sound of the voice. Soph stood by the living room door. ‘By stable, I mean she’s threatening to kill someone called Marco very slowly and painfully with her axe. She wants to see you both.’

  ‘Thanks,’ I said, pushing my chair back and standing up. Sean eased himself out of his chair like an arthritic old man and did a half trot, half limp towards the door. I got halfway there and turned back to Soph. ‘Misfit, where is he?’

  ‘He’s out looking for you, Sophie. He hasn’t stopped looking for you, only checking in from time to time to see if there was any news about you.’

  I raised my hands to my face and tried to hold back a wave of tears. I heard the sound of feet pounding down the corridor outside the apartment. I heard a voice yell, ‘Where is she?’ More pounding feet, this time from within the apartment and he appeared in the doorway, followed – I was surprised to see – by Clay, his lethal boxing gloves hanging around his neck on a string. I looked at Misfit as he took tentative steps into the room while Clay remained by the door.

  I noticed he no longer wore the bandage on his forehead and the wound was healing nicely. A frown creased Misfit’s brow as he stared back at me. I opened my mouth to say ‘Sorry’ but the words never had chance to leave my lips before he dived at me, his arms wrapped tightly around my neck. I flung my arms around Misfit’s
waist, wanting to pull his body into mine because, to me, our bodies just weren’t close enough.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ I said, after a moment. Misfit pulled away from me and wiped the tears from my cheeks with his tattooed fingers.

  ‘No need,’ he said with a half smile, brushing a strand of hair out of my damp face.

  ‘Kay’s hurt,’ I said. He placed the palm of his right hand on the side of my face and looked so deeply into my eyes that, for a moment, I became nothing but a soul with no body to hide in.

  ‘But you’re OK?’ he said.

  ‘Yes. Bruised and battered but I’m OK,’ I said as Misfit lowered his hand.

  ‘And Kay, what happened to her? Is she OK?’

  ‘She was bitten –’

  ‘What the fuck –’

  ‘No, no, not by a zombie. By a Human Zombie,’ I said.

  ‘A Human Zombie but …’

  ‘I know, we thought we’d got all of them. Shit, there’s a lot I need to tell you. Remember that bloke that turned up at the camp – Marco?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  ‘It’s him, the HZs, it’s all him.’

  ‘What?’

  I looked around and saw it was just me and Misfit in the room. I had been so absorbed in Misfit I hadn’t notice the others leave. ‘I’ll explain later. Come on,’ I said, pulling him towards the door, ‘let’s go and see Kay.’ I led him towards the bedroom that was doubling as her hospital room.

  I heard raised voices inside. I stood at the door and saw Kay, a wad of gauze bandage taped to her neck, trying to get up off the bed, while Sean and Soph held her down. I saw Misfit’s eyes widen at the sight of Sean. Now wasn’t the time to explain that Sean’s name had been cleared. Chris and Clay stood beside the bed, but the rest of the St Andrews lot had gone.

  ‘Why are we wasting time?’ said Kay. ‘Let’s go finish that bastard. Where’s my bloody axe?’

  ‘You guys need time to recover,’ said Soph. ‘You’ve lost a lot of blood and had a huge shock. You’re not strong enough right now.’

  ‘But we know where he is – the hotel,’ said Kay. ‘We need to move in and attack now.’

  ‘You need to rest, Kay,’ said Sean and I smarted at his show of concern, considering he’d not been so interested back in the café when she got bit. But then I realised I was being harsh – if it was twenty years in the future and that had been me and Jake, nothing would have been more important to me than saving him. ‘And we don’t know if they’re back at the hotel yet. It’s like stirring up a hornets’ nest, we have to wait for them to settle again. But trust me, no one wants that bastard to suffer more than me after what …’ He cast his eyes to the ground.

  ‘We’ll go back first thing tomorrow,’ I said as I walked into the room. ‘Chris, can you and your people be ready and we’ll all head to the hotel together? Get Marco and the HZs before they wake up.’

  ‘We’ll be ready.’

  Kay stopped struggling and lay back against the bed, a pile of pillows behind her head, propping her up into a sitting position. I saw Sean stroke her hair from her face. ‘Fine,’ she said. ‘But I still want my bloody axe.’

  Entry Seventeen

  We headed back to our camp shortly after. I could see that Sean, by the way his eyes wouldn’t meet those of any of the St Andrews lot, and the way he shifted uncomfortably whenever one of them came into a room, wanted to get away as soon as possible. No surprise after what Josh and Max did to him.

  Clay came back with us and Charlotte welcomed us all with open arms and excited squeals, while Stewart called me and Kay, ‘Naughty little puddings’ for going renegade. Then, sat around the fire making petrol bombs with the stuff we picked up from a petrol station on the way back to camp, me, Kay and Sean explained everything that had happened from busting Sean out of St Andrews, to what me and Kay had found in the hotel, to Marco and the HZs. And, of course, Sean told the others the full story about Anna and how he had lost her to Marco. He failed to mention the bit about wanting to grab Anna and run, leaving us all with Marco to deal with, and it annoyed me. I bit my lip. I mean, he was with us now, discussing the plan to attack the hotel the following day, and that’s all that mattered.

  Neither me nor Kay mentioned what I had done to Zombie-Sam. I guessed either Kay had forgotten about Sam in all the other events, or she realised, because I hadn’t said anything, I didn’t want anyone else to know.

  ‘I’m just relieved you’re all OK,’ said Charlotte. She leaned over and gave me a hug. I let go of Misfit’s hand and hugged her. I drew away from her and entwined my fingers back in Misfit’s.

  ‘Sorry for doubting you,’ Misfit said to Sean, who sat on the other side of the fire, next to Kay. Sean, his expression grim and washed out, nodded his head once. ‘And for … um … for trying to kill you and everything,’ added Misfit.

  ‘On more than one occasion,’ said Sean.

  ‘Yeah. Sorry.’

  Sean managed a small smile, wincing as the movement threatened to open his cut lip again. ‘No worries,’ he said. I looked across to the right to see Stewart lower his head, his eyes to the ground in front of him. ‘I’m done in,’ said Sean.

  ‘You can have my old room again,’ I said.

  Sean stood. I saw him grimace as he straightened out his limbs and he headed to the caravan. Once he was inside, Stewart looked up. ‘I’m not sorry,’ he said. ‘That man has brought us nothing but trouble and that trouble is far from over.’

  Kay stood and stomped off to the caravan without a word.

  ‘I’m turning in too,’ Charlotte said with a smile and a squeeze of my arm and she bounced off to the caravan.

  Misfit turned to Clay. ‘Cheers for today, man. You really helped keep me together.’ I shot a look at Misfit, guilty that I’d put him through the agony of not knowing what had happened to me over the last day.

  ‘No worries, man.’

  I shivered, despite the jumper and the biker jacket I was wrapped in. ‘Let’s get you inside,’ said Misfit and he stood and pulled me to my feet. ‘Clay, mate, you can take the sofa in that caravan,’ he said, nodding to his and Stewart’s caravan. ‘If you don’t fancy heading back to your place.’

  ‘Cheers, mate. I might just do that. I’m beat.’

  ‘Cool,’ said Misfit.

  ‘Night guys,’ said Clay and he stood and strode towards the caravan while Misfit led me to mine, leaving Stewart alone by the fire.

  Inside, I lay down on the sofa and Misfit pulled a blanket over me. ‘Stay,’ I said to him as he stood gazing down at me.

  ‘I wasn’t going anywhere,’ he said and he lay down beside me, on top of the blanket, and put an arm around me.

  My eyes snapped open at the sound of a frantic beeping. I sat bolt upright, confused, trying to figure out what the noise was, and in my haste I knocked Misfit’s body off mine. He rolled to the edge of the sofa and tumbled onto the floor with a thump. ‘Ouch,’ he said, sitting up on the floor and looking at me. ‘It’s just the alarm, Sophie,’ he added, noting my startled face.

  As reality flooded back into my mind, I remembered the previous night we set a battery powered alarm clock we had found in the master bedroom. It had been so long since I’d heard one go off. I picked the small clock up from the windowsill and switched it off, before placing it back. 5am. I looked out of the bay window; it was still dark and wouldn’t get light for at least another couple of hours, probably nearer three. We wanted to get to the hotel before first light, hoping to attack the HZs while they slept.

  I swung my legs to the floor and perched on the edge of the sofa while Misfit settled next to me. He placed a warm, rough hand on mine, resting on my thigh, and squeezed it. I may have got over the shock of hearing an alarm clock beep for the first time in over a year, but I looked no less startled – the thought of attacking the hotel wouldn’t allow my face to progress from the rabbit caught in the headlights look.

  I glanced at Misfit. I wanted to tell him how scared I was, not just at the thou
ght of the imminent attack, but of going back to the place where such horrific things had happened to countless people. But before I could open my mouth, Misfit took his hand off mine, slid it around my shoulders so his palm lay against the back of my neck. He pulled me towards him and kissed my forehead. ‘It’ll be OK,’ he said.

  Before I could respond, the door of my old room opening caught my attention. I expected to see Sean emerge, instead, Kay staggered out, her blonde hair all over the place. She saw me and Misfit watching and she looked sheepish.

  ‘Good night?’ Misfit said to Kay, his tone unusually playful.

  ‘Shut up, fucktard and lets go kill some psychos,’ said Kay as she walked towards the door of the caravan. Just before she disappeared outside she added, ‘And yes, it was.’

  Both me and Misfit couldn’t help grinning as Sean emerged from my old bedroom. ‘What?’ he said, trying to suppress a grin as he passed us on his way out of the caravan. Me and Misfit burst into giggles.

  ‘I’m happy for them,’ said Misfit.

  ‘Me too,’ I said with a smile. The smile slipped from my face as my thoughts went back to the attack on the hotel. I stood and added, ‘Right, let’s go kill some psychos.’

  Entry Eighteen

  At just after 5.30am we left our camp, Sean carrying a cardboard box full of petrol bombs, and made our way down to St Andrews. Soph and Chris were waiting for us in the car park with seven of their people, all tooled up and with a few of them carrying torches.

  The sixteen of us continued down towards the harbour with only the stars and the moon to light our way, having switched the torches off to avoid announcing our arrival. As we drew up outside the Gran Canaria Hotel, my stomach tightened. Images of what me and Kay had found in the restaurant the previous day ran through my mind like a torture porn movie I didn’t want to watch but couldn’t tear my eyes from either. I didn’t know what the time was but even though the sun hadn’t yet risen, the sky had lightened slightly, as though someone had turned up the contrast.