by Ivy Smoak
“Nope. I caught you. I knew it was you.” And then I realized exactly how I could prove he was Ryder. I snatched his phone off his desk and opened his gallery.
“Stealing my phone isn’t going to help anything.”
“It will when I find that topless photo of me that you took.”
“Topless photo, huh? Are you trying to trap me with some sort of sexual harassment lawsuit now?”
“No, I’m trying to prove…” I stopped talking and focused on scrolling through his gallery. But there wasn’t much. Just scans of important-looking documents and photos of him shaking hands with fancy people in suits. There definitely weren’t any pictures of me.
“Any luck finding that photo?” he asked. There was a hint of amusement in his voice.
“No. But I know it’s on here somewhere. Probably hidden…” Hidden! Of course. I knew how to prove he was in the Society. I opened his apps and scrolled through until I found one labeled Tax Codes. I clicked it.
Welcome, Ryder Storm!
Last Spa Visit - April 13
Last STD Test - April 13, Clean
“Boom. You’re Ryder Storm. Read it and weep, punk.” I started to turn the phone so he could see it, but his hand closed around mine on the phone. His other caressed my jawline, tipping my face up towards his.
We locked eyes. I could feel his desire again. It was the same as it had been the previous night. He was ravenous. And he wanted to feast on me.
I went on my tiptoes as he bent down to kiss me. Our lips crashed together. I let out a gasp, but it was lost in his mouth. The phone in our hands was forgotten. One of us tossed it onto his desk and then his hand slid around my waist. I melted into him as his soft lips pressed against mine. And then I felt his tongue. It was the gentlest of flicks, sending a shiver all the way down to my toes. Or maybe only half the way…
Tanner lifted me off the ground with one arm and sat me on his desk, never breaking our kiss. My skirt rode up practically to my hips as my legs spread around him. I allowed my hands to wander to his muscular chest. God, he was so strong. Was it safe to unbutton his shirt? Or better yet, tear it off of him? I wanted to so badly. But I thought better of it. Touching him could have been what set him off on our last date. He, however, was not at all afraid to touch me. His fingers slid under the hem of my skirt, digging into my flesh. I moaned as our tongues fought for control. Even in our kiss we were still sparring. It was like he was furious with me, when really I was the one that was furious with him.
With one swing of his arm, he cleared his desk of everything. Papers, his phone, framed pictures, one of those little perpetual motion machines…it all crashed to the floor. He deepened the kiss and pinned me to the desk. I could feel his manhood pressing against me. “Yes,” I moaned.
I reached for the buttons of his shirt, but his hands caught my wrists and slammed them back down. I was helpless against his strength. And I loved it. I bit at his bottom lip, stopping just before I might draw blood. I could hear him growl as he grew even harder.
And then a knock on his office door broke the spell. He pulled away and smoothed his suit jacket. I got up and yanked my skirt back into place (kind of…) just as his door swung open.
“Tanner, is everything…” Evie stopped mid-sentence and let out a gasp. “Good heavens! What happened in here?”
You cock blocked me!
“I think it was an earthquake,” said Tanner with no hint of sarcasm. The lie rolled off his lips effortlessly. Which made sense given how much practice he had being a filthy rotten liar, always switching between being Tanner Rhodes and Ryder Storm.
“I didn’t feel anything,” said Evie.
“Weird.” Tanner shrugged. “Anyway, we’re fine in here. In fact, we were just about finished.”
What? “Actually, we need a few more minutes,” I said. He wasn’t getting rid of me that fast again.
Evie looked to Tanner for approval.
“Give us two minutes,” he conceded.
She disappeared.
I smiled at him with a smug grin on my face. I had won. I had gotten what I wanted. And he had all but admitted that he was Ryder. “So does this mean you’re going to sign with BIMG after all, Ryder?”
“Shhh,” he hissed. “What are you trying to do?” He glared at me.
“What am I trying to do? I don’t know…have a relationship? After all, isn’t the Society about true love? That’s what you said.”
He shook his head. “You’re messing with things you don’t understand.”
“Then make me understand.”
“I can’t.” His Adam’s apple rose and fell as he stared at me. “You should go.”
“Are you serious right now?” What the actual fuck?
“I never should have kissed you. I’m sorry.” His eyes dropped to my lips. “I’m so sorry.”
“What’s your problem? Why do you keep kissing me and then pulling away? Am I really that repulsive?”
He looked hurt that I would even suggest that. “What? No. No. If anything it’s the exact opposite.”
“How so?”
“It’s complicated. Like I said, you wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me.”
“No.” His voice was so firm that I almost backed off. Almost.
“Are you a born-again virgin or something?” I asked. “If you are, just tell me and we can take things slow.”
“Uh, yeah. Yes.” He nodded enthusiastically. “Definitely. I’m that.”
“You’re lying.”
He sighed. “Fine. You want to know the truth?”
“Yes. Have I not made that clear?” Cockhat.
“I pissed off some very dangerous people. Us being together would put you in grave danger, and I’m not willing to risk that.”
“Aren’t you like…a billionaire? Just give them a couple million and tell them to leave you alone.”
“These people don’t care about money.”
“Have you thought about going to the police?”
“The police would be useless. And even if they could help, it’s out of their jurisdiction.”
I knew what that meant. That it had crossed state lines. Only the FBI could help him, and from what I’d read in countless crime novels…the FBI usually screwed everything up when they got involved. They were basically dumb babies. “Jesus. Did you piss off a Mexican cartel or something?”
“Pretty much.”
Pretty much? That was not an actual answer. I could feel my blood boiling again. He was clearly lying to me. I was going to keep arguing with him, but then I remembered Frankie’s advice. Men want what they can’t have. I needed to keep playing hard to get. “So you’re trying to purge me from your life because you’re worried your enemies will see us together and kidnap me to hurt you?”
“More or less.”
More or less my ass. “Well, you have nothing to worry about then. Because I’m not interested in you. So sign the BIMG contract and withdraw your rape accusation. From now on, our relationship is strictly business. Good day, sir.” I spun dramatically on my heel and walked out of his office.
Chapter 30 - Tanner’s Secret
Friday
When I left Tanner’s office I had a text message from Chastity: “Mason sent us home early. Meet at your place?”
Ten minutes later, I found Chastity sitting in the hallway outside my apartment.
“So did you get him to sign?” she asked as I unlocked the door.
“Yeah.”
“Yeah?” She jumped up. “So it’s a done deal?”
“Well, kinda.” I almost screamed when I saw all the boxes that still filled my apartment. I kind of thought they had just been part of some weird dream. I tossed my purse on the floor and kicked my heels off. “Actually, now that I think about it, he never said he would sign with us.”
“You’re gonna have to give me more than that.”
“I stormed into his office. I found the Society app on his phone. We hooked up on his desk.
He pulled back, pretended to be a born-again virgin, and then told me a Mexican cartel would kill me if we were together.”
“Whoa, what?”
“And then I told him I wasn’t interested in him and demanded he sign with BIMG.”
Chastity stared at me like I was crazy. “And then…?”
“Oh, then I stormed out. It was epic. I even tossed a case of cupcakes into the trash on my way out.” Remembering the satisfying squish of the cupcakes going into the trash made me smile.
“Wow, that’s…a lot.”
“It was awesome.”
Chastity plopped down in the one chair in my apartment not buried under a stack of FedEx boxes. This was an interesting test to see which she liked more: Odegaards or juicy gossip. So far, juicy gossip was winning. “So just to clarify…he banged you on his desk?”
“What? No. We just kissed. And why are you focused on that instead of the Mexican cartel that wants to dissolve my body in a vat of acid? #AcidDeath.”
“No. You’re still using hashtags wrong. Don’t use them for morbid things like that. They’re supposed to be fun. Like #JustBangedMyBoss.”
Damn it, I’d been using them in my head so well recently! Why did I always mess them up when I said them out loud?
“And I thought they just wanted to kill you normally?” added Chastity.
“Well Tanner didn’t specify the exact method of murder. But I’m just assuming they’d be professional about it.”
“Why doesn’t he just pay them to go away?” asked Chastity.
“I asked that too. He said that they don’t care about money.”
“A Mexican cartel that doesn’t care about money? And they weren’t even going to dissolve you in acid? That hardly sounds like a cartel.”
I nodded and gently moved a few boxes off the couch. “Yeah, you’re right. I should have known he was still lying. Where is Madison? I could really use some of her anti-man rhetoric right now. They’re such lying asshatteries.”
Chastity raised an eyebrow.
“You know. Like…a shop where ass hats are sold. It’s a few degrees worse than being an ass hat.”
“Oh.”
“It’s a devastating insult. Tanner was devastated when I called him that.” Fine, I didn’t actually call him that. But if I had, he would have been destroyed.
Chastity nodded. Clearly she wasn’t getting it.
“Imagine a hat store, but all the hats are made of asses… You know what? Forget it. Did you see all these Odegaards?!” I gestured to all the FedEx boxes. The ones Tanner had sent me as an apology for running away during make-out sesh. Or for getting me kicked out of the Society. Or for getting me almost fired from my new job.
“First, this is freaking amazing. I’m supes jeals (super jealous, for those of you that don’t speak Chastity). Second, were all these shoes an apology for walking out on your kiss last night, or for ruining our lives today?”
“That is an excellent question.” I bit the inside of my lip as I thought about it. “I think both?” Although, he may not have known I’d get almost fired. And he certainly couldn’t have known about the Society thing. Unless he’d been the one who reported me…
Chastity picked up a box and cut the tape with her terrifying fake nails. “That’s what I’m thinking too. In that case, don’t half of them belong to me since he was getting me fired too?”
I stared at her. “Aren’t your feet like two sizes bigger than mine?”
“I don’t care what size they are.” She ever so gently removed a pair of Odegaards from the box and cradled them like a baby. “If I have to cut off my toes to make them fit, I’ll do it.”
“That’s one way to keep the foot freaks away.”
“Speaking of foot freaks, have you heard anything new from Dr. Lyons about your date tomorrow night?”
I laughed. “I hate that segue for so many different reasons. But no, I haven’t.”
“Well, you’ll certainly be going in style. Which Odegaards are you gonna wear?” Chastity picked up another shoebox. “Oh my God, did he send you the new Medusas?”
“I dunno. I only got to look at a few pairs before work.”
“You mean we’re sitting in a room with dozens of mystery Odegaards? The fashion police would stick us in a vat of acid for that.” She grabbed a pair of scissors and got to work opening the boxes.
“You’re confusing the fashion police with the cartel that wants to kill me.”
Chastity shook her head. “I’m calling BS on that cartel story. Give me a sec...” She pulled out her phone and started typing furiously.
“Please tell me you’re not texting Tanner.”
“Nope. It was Dexter.”
“That name means nothing to me.”
“He’s an IT guy at BIMG. I played D&D with him and some friends after work one day, so he owes me one.”
“You played D&D?” I really could not picture that.
“Yeah. It wasn’t too bad. Did you know there’s a spell that makes your shirt disappear?”
That didn’t sound right. “Your character’s shirt, or yours?”
“Well, both.”
Oh sweet, simple Chastity. “I don’t know anything about D&D, but those pervs definitely just wanted to see your boobs.”
“I knew it seemed suspicious!” She glanced at her phone. “Dexter says that there’s no cartel chatter about Tanner.”
“What about the mafia?”
After a few more texts Chastity shook her head. “Nope. Apparently there’s no chatter about him at all. Not from the mafia. Not from the Russians. And not from anyone else.”
“You trust this Dexter guy?”
“Yup. He wouldn’t dare lie to me.”
He lied to you about that disappearing shirt spell. “Alright, so let’s assume all the usual suspects are out. How else do we explain his weird behavior?” And the more I thought of it, the more I realized just how strange Tanner was. One of the first things he’d ever said to me was something about a bedchamber. And then all those old movies he referenced. And that thing about the Gestapo.
“I don’t know. But I intend to figure it out.” Chastity grabbed another box. “But I can’t think until I know what Odegaards you have in these boxes.”
***
We stepped back and looked at all the shoes. They were magnificent.
“So which are your favorites?” asked Chastity.
“Hmm…maybe the Medusas.” They were ridiculous in so many ways - the white and green snakeskin, the thigh-high cut, the ridiculously tall heels - but I kind of loved them. It was a shame I’d never have the confidence to wear them.
“Solid choice. But I thought for sure you were gonna choose these.” She pointed to a pair of classy 6” black lace stilettos. “The real question, though, is what the hell is up with those weird elf shoes?”
I picked up one of the white heels with the curly toe. “Yeah, I dunno. Ryder really liked these ones though. They were the first ones he tried to get me to try on at the store.” Another weird thing to add to the list of weird things about Tanner.
“Interesting.” Chastity stroked her chin. “Very interesting.”
“You look like you just figured something out.”
She stopped stroking her chin and smiled. “Yup. There’s only one explanation. He’s an elf.”
“Say what now?”
“He’s an elf,” said Chastity with 100% certainty. “Just hear me out. He must have run away from the North Pole. And now he’s being hunted by Santa.”
I laughed. Santa would never hunt. He was…Santa.
“I’m serious! Think about it. It all fits. It explains his elf-shoe fetish. And why he can’t just pay his enemies off. Everyone knows Santa doesn’t take bribes.”
“Unless the bribe is milk and cookies.” I glanced at the two empty wine bottles on the coffee table. Chastity had insisted that we drink while we opened the rest of the boxes. “How much have you had to drink?”
Chastity too
k another sip from her wine glass. “Not much. Why? You want more?” She picked up one of the empty bottles and shook it furiously to get every last drop out. Before I could answer, her face lit up again. “Oh! I have an idea. As an elf, Tanner must know that you write letters to Santa every year. What if you write an early letter this year asking for an engagement ring from Tanner. Then he’d propose, and his cover would be blown. We’d know he’s…”
She’s so drunk. And then I remembered something. “I actually did tell him about my letters to Santa.” Didn’t I? I thought I had, but we’d talked about so much that first night that the whole conversation was kind of a blur.
“And who brought up letters to Santa first?”
“I think I did. Maybe he did. Gah! I can’t remember.” I took another sip of wine to try to clear my head. Was it really possible that he was a runaway Christmas elf? Of course it wasn’t! That would be crazy. Then again, I had thought the same thing about my invitation to the Society, but that had turned out to be quite real. And I was kind of dating a billionaire. Since when did my life get so crazy?
“Well there you go.” Chastity tipped the now empty bottle of wine towards me. “He’s a Christmas elf. It’s settled.”
“It’s a fun idea, but you’re crazy. He’s probably just in the mafia or something. Or pissed off the mafia. The police can’t help him because the mob paid them off. And it would explain why he can’t buy his way out of trouble. If he crossed them, they’d have to retaliate to send a message. Otherwise they’d look weak.”
“Oh!” said Chastity, totally ignoring my very logical argument. “I’ve got it. He’s a vampire!”
“Darn. I was hoping he was a werewolf. After all, I always was #TeamJacob.” Not.
Chastity stroked her imaginary beard. “I hadn’t considered that angle… We better consult the literature.” She grabbed my copy of Twilight and started reading aloud.
That was about the time that the night really got away from us. First we speed-read the entire Twilight saga, and then we went into a paranormal rabbit hole. I thought we were just going to find more books about vampires, but no - it doesn’t stop there. We found books about dragon shifters, and other shifters. Really just about every type of shifter you can imagine. Then we dove deeper and found one series about a BBW (big beautiful woman) witch who fell in love with an alien werewolf dude and encountered some gnomes that lived on giant mushrooms or something. I don’t know. That description doesn’t do justice to how weird it was. But the weirdest of all…that award definitely went to the bigfoot erotica.
